Ch. 21

Thank you again!

Sawyer was one at the end of the last chapter. He is three here.

Two years later

Time passed for them more quickly that it did before they had Sawyer. Used to, they'd spend their free time messing around or sitting up on the roof. They still messed around, but after they were sure he was asleep, and neither one of them ever dared go up to the roof.

That little boy wasn't to be trusted at all.

He was the reason that there was plywood over the gate to cover the slats.

A few weeks earlier, they were harvesting the garden and letting him help pick stuff with them. Beth had gone to put the peas in the kitchen, and Daryl had turned his back one-second, and when he turned back around, Sawyer was gone.

He had called out his name, and Beth had come out of the kitchen at the sound. They both rushed around the place, and up to the front yard just in time to see him squeezing his little body in between the metal slates.

"Sawyer!" He hollered and took off running. They hadn't had a walker in months, but it would be their luck one would show up right in front of them, so he sprinted faster. "Get back here now!"

"No, sir! Stop right now." Beth yelled as he stopped and looked back at them with a grin then crossed through the gate to the other side.

He almost had a fucking heart attack and instead of trying to fiddle with the lock, he climbed the damn gate like some kind of crazed man and landed on the other side right as his son tripped and face planted into the ground.

Sawyer cried and reached for Beth who looked like she was close to passing out.

"Ya can't do that, Bub. Can't go outside." Daryl looked down and tried to catch his eyes, but he was little and knew he had done something wrong, and he hurt himself on top of that, so he buried his face in Daryl's chest. "It's okay. Momma's gettin' the gate opened."

When they got back in the yard, Beth took him and hugged him close as Daryl relocked the gate.

After they got him to sleep that night, Daryl laid down on the couch with his head in Beth's lap and said, "Gotta get somethin' to cover the gate with."

"That's a good idea," she said and ran her fingers through his hair.

He took her hand and pressed a kiss to her palm. "Wanna go fool around?"

"Are all the doors locked and chained?" She asked with a grin.

"Of course they are," he mumbled and pulled on the end of her ponytail, so she would lean down and kiss him.

"Momma!" His voice screeched through the kitchen. "Why kissin', daddy?"

"'Cause I love daddy," Beth said with a sigh. "You're supposed to be in bed, little man."

"It's dark, and I scared."

He wanted to say there wasn't anything to be scared of, but that was a lie. Instead, he sat up and helped Beth stand. "We'll all lay down then," he said and picked up Sawyer before walking back into the bedroom.

They laid down on the bed with Sawyer between them and after a few seconds of silence, he said, "Momma's tummy." He scooted down and laid his head on her stomach. "Ya sing the pretty song, momma?"

"Just once, okay?"

He nodded and yawned.

Beth started singing a song that her momma had sang to her when she was little. Normally, all she had to do was twirl a strand of his hair around her finger, sing the song, and he would be out like a light.

Daryl peeked down at his boy once more then closed his eyes.

The older Sawyer got, the more he looked liked Daryl. He had that dark, shaggy hair since Beth wouldn't cut it and dark blue eyes like his, they were more open like Beth's, though. He had her lips but Daryl's jaw line and janky little ear that always stuck out from under his hair.

Beth said you could really see it when they smiled because they had the same little half grin.

Apparently passing out while she sang ran in the family, too, because he never did get past a kiss that night, and he didn't remember falling asleep.

The garden had turned out really well. They canned for days, and Daryl got as stir crazy as Sawyer by the end of it.

"Why don't y'all go outside?" She offered and practically pushed them out the door.

"Bye, momma!" Sawyer yelled and took off into the backyard with Daryl on his heels.

"Bye, baby!" Beth called and waved from the door.

They played tag for a bit then Daryl put him on his shoulders and started walking around the wall.

"Now, this wall's important, Bub."

"I know," he said and pulled on his hair a little trying to get him to turn. "Don't go without ya."

"That's right. When ya get bigger, I'll teach ya how to hunt and track, so ya can help me take care of momma."

"I'm brave."

Daryl tapped on his foot. "There's a difference between stupid brave and smart brave."

"I'm smart. Momma said I was."

"Ya are, but sometimes it's smart to run away."

"Like chase?" Before he could say anything, Sawyer bent to the side and tilted his head right in front of Daryl's face. "Daddy?"

"Yeah, Bub?"

"I want arrows."

Daryl flipped him off his shoulders and put him back on the ground. "When ya get bigger."

Sawyer reach up and grabbed his hand, holding it as they kept walking.

At first, it had been hard not to flinch or feel uncomfortable with the affection from his little boy. He hadn't been given any as a child and had always been called names for wanting a hug or trying to get to close to anyone.

His momma was good about treating him nice when his daddy hadn't been around, but he didn't think he had ever held his old man's hand. Not even when he was dying on the forest floor after getting eaten by a walker.

Daryl couldn't even say if what he felt then had been sadness.

Then one evening while he and Beth were sitting on the couch, he poured it all out to her.

She had hugged him tight to her and whispered into his ear, "You're not him."

"What if I turn that way?"

"Ya won't." Her voice was so full of conviction and he turned his head and looked at her.

"How do ya know that?"

Beth kissed him slowly then pulled back, meeting his gaze again. "You're the man that hunted me down when no one else cared, the man that stayed here with me, the man who brought me peach schnapps in a tree house and took me back to my home." He smiled at that and so did she. "Tell me, Mr. Dixon, who was the first person your son saw when he was born? Who was the first person to ever hold him, show him attention, and treat him with love?"

The next day, he let his toddler hold his hand as they walked around the backyard.

His hands had done a lot of bad shit in his time, but turned out, they also did good stuff, too.

"Daryl?" Beth shook him awake.

He opened his eyes up and squinted at her. "What's wrong?"

"Listen."

Daryl got very quiet and his heart started beating in overdrive as the groans got louder and louder.

He was up instantly and pulling on his shirt. "All the doors are locked and chained. Can't nothin' get inside this armory," he whispered.

"What about the gate?" She asked and watched him as moved the chair to the wall and stepped up in it to look at the broken window, a chilly breeze blew through signaling winter's approach.

"Standin', but looks like a lot of movement."

"What the hell?" She whispered hysterically.

"No clue, darlin'. Not a damn clue."

Neither one of them moved, and he prayed that Sawyer would stay asleep. If he woke up, and started crying. They'd never be able to get out.

"What do we do?" Beth asked after several minutes.

"Looks like they're just at the gate. Maybe ten of 'em. I can't tell too much since it's dark, but by the sound, there ain't a herd."

"They're so loud."

Daryl nodded. "Ya ain't seen walkers in a bunch in a while, Beth. Ya forgot how they really sound when they're this close."

Beth covered her face with her hands and tried to calm her breathing down while he turned back to the window. He stood there for hours watching them at the gate.

They weren't wandering off, and they weren't pressing hard enough against it to knock it over. There weren't enough of them to cause it to break anyway.

When the sun started to rise, he stepped off the chair and grabbed his bow. "I'm gonna get up on the roof and get a better look."

She looked from him to Sawyer then back. "Please, be careful, Daryl."

"I ain't gonna do nothin' stupid, darlin'. I swear to ya."

She nodded shakily and hugged him as tight as she could. "I forgot how it was."

Daryl kissed the top of her head and whispered, "I didn't forget 'em, but I forgot what it was like to have 'em near y'all."

They broke apart, and he went into the barracks then up the rusty ladder that led to a hatch in the ceiling. It creaked a little when he opened it, but it was up so high the walkers wouldn't think it was in front of them. Might even be confused and start wandering somewhere else, he hoped.

On top of the armory, he crouched down and moved quickly to the front of the building then laid down on his stomach.

There were twelve walkers all gathered around the gate, pushing and groaning, their faces seeming to press into the wood like they were trying to eat something. It was too many to kill by himself or even if Beth came and helped him.

He'd never use the ammo to shoot them from the roof and have the gunshots bring down more if they were in the area. He was at a complete loss at what to do for several minutes before he and the walkers heard a loud crash in the distance.

They all looked to the left and the walkers amble off towards the noise, and Daryl released a long breath. Once they were out of sight, he went down the ladder and out toward the gate.

He looked around and saw several drops of blood on the ground and a handprint against the plywood, but no body.

That wasn't a good sign at all. One the ground, were so many footprints that he couldn't tell which were walkers and which were people, but once he stepped away, he could tell the distinct path the people had taken. There were three sets of footprints, but no blood, so he assumed someone was being carried.

An unnerving feeling skittered up his spine as he looked around the woods. And he wondered who had made that crash because he was certain it wasn't an accident.

He locked the gate back up after he got rid of the blood and went back into the armory.

Beth was walking the kitchen and Sawyer was blissfully unaware of anything going on.

"Well?" She asked, trying to make her voice not sound strained.

"Looks like we had a wounded animal that left some blood and a print on the gate. They were being followed by something, so they took off."

Beth paled and looked to Sawyer who was drawing with some colors Daryl had found a few months ago.

"Ya think we're safe?" She whispered and stepped toward him.

"Dunno. Thinkin' about lookin' in the woods, but I don't wanna leave y'all here unprotected, and I don't wanna get ambushed," he whispered back.

"What should we do?"

He took a few strips of rabbit meat from one the plastic containers then said, "I'm gonna take the rifle and get up on the roof. Keep an eye out."

"Okay, babe." Her voice was just a breath.

Several hours later, he was getting sleepy and stiff from laying on the roof. He had been looking through the woods with the scope and nothing had made an appearance. He wondered if it was just a random accident.

People were running from walkers, got up to the gate and tried to get in before they realized the walkers were too close then took off again. It wasn't too difficult to believe something like that.

He spent the next couple of days doing the same thing, and he'd take a nap in the early evenings, then spend the nights up there, too. Beth insisted that she take a turn, and they work in shifts, but he refused. Finally, he was so worn out that he didn't wake up when she laid down Sawyer one night, so she just left him in bed and took the roof herself.

Daryl had been pissed at first, but that quickly vanished when he saw how tired she looked and had still fixed something for them to eat for breakfast.

"We all got jobs to do, Daryl." She handed him a little plate with some opossum on it. "And sometimes our jobs overlap now."

He thanked her for the food, and she took a little nap before getting up to take care of Sawyer through the day while he went to the roof.

The boy was off in his own little world, playing and coloring. He missed going outside, but Beth had told him that they couldn't right now because it wasn't safe, and Daddy was trying to make it safe.

Daryl looked at his son and shook his head because he looked like him for sure, but he acted so much like Beth, always creating or imagining something.

After five days of nothing, Daryl decided that it probably was an accident, and whoever had been at the gate was either dead or long gone by then.

That morning, instead of heading up to the roof after Beth's nap, he said he was going to check the snares. Beth and Sawyer stayed inside and he was back within the hour, two rabbits and three squirrels on his belt.

They all sat outside that evening as Daryl cleaned the animals and cooked them over the grill. The weather was getting colder, and he looked at Sawyer who was wearing a too small jacket.

"I'm goin' on a run soon, Bub. I think ya need a bigger jacket. You're gettin' to be a big boy," he said and nudged him with his shoulder.

Sawyer grinned and so did Beth.

"He's right, baby. You're growin' up on me." She picked him up and kissed his cheek.

"I wanna be big like daddy," he said in his little squeaky voice.

Beth looked at Daryl with soft eyes and then back to Sawyer. "Ya will. It just takes time, and ya gotta eat all your food so ya can get strong."

That started him and Beth going back and forth about what foods were good and what foods didn't taste right, and how grass was green, could he eat that?

Daryl smiled and cleaned off his knife.

"Ya can't eat grass," she laughed. "You're not a cow!" Then she tickled his side.

After he finished giggling he asked, "What's a cow?"

Beth got quiet, and he looked over at her. Now, that he was talking really well and learning more, he would ask questions when they talked about stuff he didn't know anything about.

"Well, ya remember when I told ya things used to be different?" He nodded. "A long time ago, there were animals called cows, and we used to eat them like we do the squirrels and rabbits. And cows would eat grass like this." She made an exaggerated chewing motion with her mouth and Sawyer laughed again.

"Why don't ya go sit by daddy, and I'll get the food ready."

He sat down by Daryl and looked between them. "You have a daddy?"

Daryl tensed for a second then nodded. "Sure did, Bub. So did your momma. Everyone had a momma and daddy at some point."

"Who's everyone? Where's you daddy?"

Daryl sighed. It was moments like these when he hated how the world was more than anything.

"Everyone means like other people. My daddy died a long time ago. Momma's daddy went to heaven later." His voice cracked as he remembered the small smile on Hershel's face right before the blade came down on him. "Your momma's daddy, he'd be your grandpa. He was a good man. He'd have loved ya."

Daryl saw Beth walk quickly into the kitchen and knew she must have been crying because he was right on the verge of it himself.

"Are ya sad?" Sawyer asked and patted his cheek.

Daryl tried to smile and shrugged. "Miss him."

"You daddy or grandpa?"

"They'd both be called your grandpa, but I really miss momma's daddy. He was good to me."

"Do ya wanna go play before food?"

And just like that, he was onto something else, and without a clue just how many people had gone before him that he would never meet or understanding the depth at which his daddy had opened himself up to him.

Daryl ruffled his shaggy brown hair and said, "Sure, Bub. We got time."