Hello everybody. I'm sorry for being all late again. I kept meaning to start it, and then stuff would happen, and I'd end up falling asleep or decide to be kind of responsible and do homework or something like that. I actually haven't felt like I've been able to write anything for almost a week now, but hopefully this will get me out of that rut. Anyway, it's finally here though, so hurray.

Chapter 21

Just like Selim had thought, after the two had finished with his next alchemy lesson, his mind was whirling again. He wished it was just from attempting to remember and sort through all the new knowledge, but that wasn't really the case. It was part of it, yes, but there was that aching urge inside of him saying that all of this was much too familiar to be normal.

Climbing into his bed, he wasn't really all that tired. He hadn't done too much today besides try and ignore everything picking at him. Trying to picture a calendar in his head, he counted the days until he would have to go back home. It was the end of his eighth day here now, and he really couldn't believe how short it'd actually been. It seemed like so much had happened in such a small amount of time. He was a bit over halfway through his visit now, only six days left. He'd miss it here, even with all the confusion it brought. Shaking his head, the black haired boy tried to just block those thoughts from his mind. He still had six days left, after all.

It took a few hours for Selim to finally fall to sleep. He wasn't able to really get much though, just lying there staring at the ceiling and thinking. There wasn't anything new for him to add to his equation yet, so for the moment, he was stuck.

When he woke up on the morning of his ninth day, he was very glad at the lack of nightmares for once. With how much he'd been scrutinizing everything, he was sure it was only instigating them even more than usual. Quickly getting dressed, he started downstairs to see if Alphonse was awake yet.

The blonde didn't seem to be anywhere, which was a bit strange. He was almost always up before Selim, and looking at the clock it wasn't really that early. 9:03am, he really should be up by now.

Frowning slightly, the child started back up the stairs and to Alphonse's room. Maybe he was feeling sick or something. If that was it, then Selim would see if there was anything he could do to help him. Once he got there though, he found the room empty, which didn't help to clear his confusion much at all. Well, maybe he went out to get something, like breakfast or something from his brother. He might not of wanted to wake him up to tell him, especially if it was really early and with the way the black haired boy hadn't been able to sleep too well for the past few days.

Shrugging slightly, he tried not to worry about it and went back downstairs to make himself something to eat. Mr. Al was a great alchemist and fighter, although he'd never actually seen him fight anything, but he'd heard things. He was definitely capable of taking care of himself.

The black haired boy had just managed to finish almost all of his toast, just leaving a bit of the crust on the plate when Alphonse came walking in through the front door. He wasn't carrying any groceries or anything, so Selim could only assume it was probably more along the lines of having to do with his brother, or visiting some other people who liked in the small rural town.

"Mr. Alphonse, good morning," Selim said happily, getting up from the table and walking over to where the young man was. Al smiled down at him as he took a grey hat off and placed it down on the side table.

"Good morning, when did you get up?" the blonde asked, walking a bit farther into the house. Selim followed him, still wondering where he had gone off to.

"A little while ago, where were you?" he asked.

"At Ed's. Sorry, I meant to leave a note incase you woke up, but I couldn't find my shoes and it completely slipped my mind once I finally found them," Alphonse explained casually. Selim just nodded, taking a seat on the couch as Al took a quick glance out the window. It seemed like it was pretty windy today, Selim guessed that was why he'd been wearing that hat.

"I think it's gonna storm soon…" the blonde man mumbled slightly before turning back towards Selim. When the boy looked outside though, there weren't that many clouds. "It's still got about another hour or so if you want to go outside for a little bit though," he suggested, and now Selim could see the band of grey clouds just over the horizon. He thought for a moment before nodding. Sure, he wasn't really able to find something to do outside yesterday, but it might be different this time around. "Alright, but makes sure you don't go too far away," Al said as Selim started getting his shoes on.

"I wont," the child promised before he walked out through the front door. It was a lot windier than he was used to, but it actually felt kind of nice. His hair was whipping around slightly, but he was pretty sure Al was right in saying that it would probably hold off for at least another hour. Plus, even if it did start raining, he'd already said he wasn't going to go very far, he could just run back inside where it was safe.

The black haired child started walking around the yard, trying to distract himself with all the plants there. It was something he liked to do back home, and these plants were different, especially the ones from Xing. Some of the taller ones were flailing around in the wind, their shadows following the pattern wildly.

He couldn't help but be a bit mesmerized by the silhouetted shapes, still visible as the clouds had yet to block out the sun. Something inside him said that he probably shouldn't spend his time staring at shadows, especially with the way his dreams went most of the time. It was always that thing from the shadows that would terrify him. It was the one thing that would let him really know what was reality and what was a dream. Except for that one time, in the forest…

He wished he hadn't closed his eyes then. How was he suppose to know that something that could have potentially told him if everything was real, or if he was just over thinking it and starting to go insane was about to happen though? He could see the temptation to go back to the forest and investigate like Ethan had, but firmly decided against it. He said he wasn't going to go far, and it was obvious that Ethan's trip hadn't ended very well.

Frowning, he didn't notice that the wind had started to pick up even more now, already lost in his own thoughts. He was quite good at blocking out the rest of the world when he wanted to, instead focusing solely within himself. It was just like last night though, he didn't have anything else to add to his puzzle. If he couldn't find any more pieces, how was he suppose to figure out what the picture was?

Selim almost wished he did have one of those awful dreams last night. Maybe if it was something new it would have given him some sort of clue. If he didn't figure it out soon, he wasn't sure how much longer he could go before he straight up asked Mr. Al what was wrong with him. He was still a bit too terrified of what would happen if everything was true though. If he was some sort of monster…

"Selim? Are you okay? It's raining," Alphonse's voice broke the boy out of his trance, and he looked around to see that it was indeed raining. It wasn't very hard, just a small drizzle, but he still should have noticed it. Looking back towards the grown, the shadow that had set his whole train of thought off was gone now, hidden by the overcast.

"Yes," he answered, before quickly walking towards the door and went back inside. His hair was just a bit damp, and his clothes were mostly fine, he didn't need to change or anything, thankfully. If the rain had gotten worse and he didn't notice, then Mr. Al probably wouldn't have taken yes as an answer. He didn't even seem like he wanted to take it as one now.

"Alright…" he said uncertainly, watching the child as he sat down and started looking over a few of the photographs framed on the side table. None of them really stuck out to Selim. He couldn't help but notice that most, no wait, all of the ones with the armored man in them were gone now, and frowned. There hadn't been that many to begin with, but it was clear now that it wasn't something Mr. Al wanted him to know too much about. Then why had he given him that doll all those years ago in the first place?

"Mr. Al?" he asked quietly, not taking his eyes away from the photos. It wasn't that he was cared about them anymore, because he didn't really. They were all too recent, although he wasn't even sure what time period he was looking for. Something from before he was born. The blonde man stopped in his tracks and turned towards the child. No, he was staring at the photos because he was afraid to look back at his current guardian.

"Hm? What is it?" he asked casually, not sounding suspicious about the way he'd spaced out in the backyard or was avoiding eye contact now. Selim could only wonder how much of it was an act.

"What's a homunculus?" the black haired boy said quietly, and could almost feel the way Alphonse flinched at the seemingly innocent question.

"What?" the blonde asked back, trying to hide the shock and fear in his voice. Selim was still able to notice them though, and quickly added them to whatever list of strange things he had going on in his head. He said he was good at puzzles, but it seemed it was much harder to get the pieces than it was to actually put them together.

"Um, I asked what a homunculus is. I… I saw it in that book, and was wondering…" he explained, still afraid to go above a whisper, but managed to sneak a look back at Al. His expression didn't have any of the shock that he knew what there a moment before, but it was mostly blank now. Mostly… there actually seemed to be a bit of… anger? Oh no…

"You looked in the Human Transmutation book?" He asked, and all Selim could do was nod, not able to turn back and stare at the pictures again. Mr. Al didn't get mad very often, or ever really. Just that one time, when he'd started asking too many questions, and now… "I thought I said that was something that no one should bother with," he said, and Selim nodded again.

"I know… I was just curious, I wasn't going to do any of it… I don't even have anyone to try to bring back…" He mumbled, but it didn't seem to give the older man any sort of comfort.

"Yes, I know you don't now, but that doesn't mean it wont always be that way. You're a smart boy, and I know that curiosity can get the better of us some times, but I do not want you to mess around with anything even close to human transmutation. The more you know about it, the worse," Al said, and Selim wasn't sure what else he could say back. He didn't want to upset the man anymore then he already was. Even if he didn't even look or sound that mad, it was clear that this was something he did not like in the least. There was just a burning behind his eyes that wouldn't leave the boy alone.

"Okay… I promise I wont do anything," he said, staring at the floor now, and Al nodded approvingly. Taking a breath, he looked back up at the man and tried to see if he could ask just one more question. If he wasn't going to get an answer to his first one, at the very least. "But um…" he started, catching Alphonse's attention again quickly. "why do you um… hate it so much, if your dad didn't try it?" he asked.

"Selim, I hate it because it's wrong. You can't reverse the flow of the world, it will only-" before the young man was able to finish his sentence, Selim spoke up again. He wasn't thinking, it'd just slipped out, something clicking in his head at that moment.

"Did you do it?" he asked, his hands almost instantly flying up to cover his mouth. His eyes were wide as dinner plates as he stared at a stunned Alphonse, who froze as soon as the question left the child's mouth. The guilt in his eyes was obvious, and Selim couldn't move from his spot as his hands slowly moved down from his mouth to hang limply at his sides. "O-oh…" he stuttered out.

After a few moments Alphonse sighed and ran a hand down his face. "Selim…" he started, not really sure what he wanted to say. "Look, just listen to me about this, okay? Stay away from that book, I don't know why I didn't just get rid of it ages ago," he mumbled, and Selim nodded obediently. The rain was coming down harder now, and the black haired boy couldn't help but think how fitting it was.

"I'll go make us some lunch, why don't you go find something fun to do until it's done?" Alphonse suggested, the previous strain from before mostly gone. Selim just nodded again, quickly getting up from the couch and nearly running until he was inside of the guest room with the door closed.

That… wasn't what he'd thought he'd find out, and now he felt guilty… It was obviously not something Mr. Al was comfortable talking about, but at least he hadn't gotten too upset. If he didn't get upset with something as personal as that, then maybe…

No, the child quickly shook his head to rid himself of the thought. He couldn't ask the blonde man any more questions. Maybe he could tell him about his dreams, and see if he'd say anything on his own, but he wasn't going to start prying into his past again. Human transmutation was illegal and… and really, really bad, according to Mr. Alphonse. He said it was impossible too, and he was the greatest alchemist in the world. If he couldn't do it, then it was probably true.

Sitting on his bed with the old stuffed armor in his hands, he tried to not think about the heavy old alchemy book, or what could have possibly caused the blonde man to do something so desperate.

Most of all though, he tried not to think of why that old armor in his dreams always spoke with Mr. Al's voice…

Hurray, finally finished this. Sorry once again for the long wait. Also for Selim taking so long in figuring everything out. I know some of you were starting to get a bit impatient with the last chapter. Hopefully this revelation helped move things forwards a bit.

Well, I hope you liked this chapter, and as always reviews are greatly welcomed.