How grateful she was for Kylo grabbing her by her arm and leading her out of there, away from Snoke. His appearance had made an everlasting impression, and Nara promised herself she would never come into a situation where she would have to come before him again.

Hux tracked her closely as they left the room, his eyes burning in her back. She tried to pay no attention to it, but it began to feel like whatever she would do it would never be enough for him. Sooner or later he was going to doubt her again and demand more information, but after today she didn't have more to give. She gave up their location. What else would they want from her?

She felt disgusted with herself. Nara tried to convince herself she had told them where the Resistance was situated so the mission wouldn't be jeopardized, but deep inside she knew it was to save herself. Her selfishness had perhaps cost the lives of many.

As she tucked her hair behind her ear she disabled the chip. Her message had been sent and she could only hope it would reach them in time. Perhaps she could try and stall whatever they were going to do on D'Qar, but then again she didn't want to put herself in the same position as she was today. If it had proven one thing it was that she had to be more convincing. The Resistance was no more. She fully had to embrace the First Order and give in to anything they might desire from her.

Kylo let the two of them back to his living quarters, their eyes just briefly meeting. Nara wasn't sure what she was seeing. Was he proud of her? Disappointed? Both?

Nara decided to remain silent as they made their way back as she tried to assess Kylo's reaction. He had been protective of her in there, that much she knew, but had she done enough to convince him as well?

When they were back in his room, she began to take off the plastoid armor that covered her body. She hadn't realized how cramped it had made her feel, and taking it off felt relieving.

Kylo unwrapped the black fabric that went around his shoulders and released himself of his belt. Without it he felt a lot less imposing and while she had expected it would let her feel at ease, the nervousness in her stomach wouldn't seem to fade. She didn't expect it would go away until she had heard back from the Resistance.

"I don't understand," he spoke, breaking the silence.

He had placed his lightsaber on the table and had completely undressed except for the black pants and shirt he wore underneath of his uniform.

Nara raised her gaze as she stopped to take off the piece that had covered her thigh.

"Why did you hold back?"

She swallowed as she felt her skin burning. The uneasy feeling returned, and Nara figured the only option she had was to tell a distant version of the truth.

"I was confused, Kylo. It all felt so wrong. The thought of seeing you kill Luke was just too much. I am trying, but it is like the light inside of me does not want to fade. You would understand that, right?"

Kylo moved forward and took her hand in his.

"You have to let in the darkness. It's not easy, but it will be worth it. Once you see its powers you'll never doubt it again."

Nara wasn't sure if what he was saying was the entire truth. She had felt him toss and turn late at night, and she didn't think it was because he was nervous to go to Luke's location. Something told her it was Han who was haunting him at night, and if the dark side was supposedly so strong, how could he?

Still, Kylo spoke his words with certainty and she nodded nevertheless.

"What are you going to do to the Resistance?" Nara asked, her voice soft. She didn't want to face reality, but she had to. She owed it to them.

"I don't know," he shook his head. "I'm going to discuss it later tonight, but I am sure we will destroy it like we have destroyed other planets."

Even though she had already seen this coming, the truth still hurt. What she would do to be a fly on the wall during that meeting. She could use the information to send to the Resistance, and try to make up for her betrayal. Maybe she could manage to interrogate Kylo about it at night, pretend she was interested about the destruction of D'Qar.

She inhaled sharply before releasing her breath. His fingers was still intertwined with hers, his rough skin that was hardened by battle brushing against the softness of hers.

"What will happen to me?" she then asked, an unsteady tone to her voice.

"Short term? You're gonna stay here," Kylo replied. "I'm not letting you go. Long term however… I can't answer that yet."

Nara was surprised by his honesty. She averted her gaze, letting it all sink in. If anything today had been a huge lesson to her. Whatever she did, she had to be more convincing. All her actions were being watched closely by either Hux or someone else, and she couldn't allow herself to slip up again. The only thing she could to make it up to the Resistance was provided them with all the information she could possibly get, and she'd have to get deep for that. She had to let the dark side reach to her, even though she did not want it to be. If she could keep it balanced she might be of help and would live to tell it.

She nodded slowly, looking back up again.

"I won't disappoint again. I promise."

A soft smile unraveled on Kylo's lips. He leaned forward, his nose almost touching hers as his hands found her hips.

"I believe you," he spoke, before kissing her with so much affection that it warmed her heart and made her forget about the Resistance just long enough to let her body soften.

When Kylo left to discuss whatever the First Order was going to do about the Resistance on D'Qar, Nara was left alone with her thoughts for the first time, and it scared her. As soon as she was sure he was far enough down the corridor so he wouldn't hear anything, she pressed the transmitter behind her ear.

The piece hummed and crackled in her ear. It felt like her stomach had been turned upside down as she anxiously waited for any messages that the Resistance might have left her.

"We've received your message, Nara," someone said, but she couldn't recognize the voice. Her heart sank. She had hoped it would be Leia addressing her, telling her everything was going to be alright. The absence of her voice left her feeling more nervous than she already was. They obviously weren't happy with what she had done, but how could they?

"D'Qar will be vacated as soon as we can. For security reasons we will not tell you yet where we will position our base next. Keep giving us information."

The message stopped abruptly without as much as a goodbye or a good luck. The messenger had spoken calmly, almost as if he had been annoyed. Nara gripped the bedding, letting the fabric run through her fingers before moving her hand up to her ear again.

The hum stopped and the room was completely silent again. She shook her head, closing her eyes. Betraying the Resistance was the worst thing she had ever done, and she had done it for selfish reasons. This was not how her parents had raised her. This was not how she knew herself. Even the Resistance was seeing the bad in her. They didn't even want to tell her the next location in case she would rat them out once more.

Nara opened her eyes. What if the dark side was already creeping its way inside of her? What if it had possessed her sooner than she had thought? The way she had given them up so easily, it wasn't like her. She had been a Resistance fighter through and through, willing to die for the operation, but something was witholding her from dying all together, and perhaps it was the dark side.

Desperate to get rid of her thoughts Nara jumped under the shower once more, hoping the water would wash away her feelings.

She stayed there until she heard the door opening again and the skin on her finger tops had gone wrinkly. Her heartbeat increased as she stepped out, quickly throwing on a t-shirt that was too big for her and wrapping her head in a towel to prevent the water from dripping down her back.

With her hand resting on the doorpost Nara waited patiently until Kylo spoke.

"We're not going to attack just yet," Kylo spoke. "We're going to use the element of surprise to our advantage."

Nara held her breath. Surprise. The First Order would certainly be surprised when they would realize the Resistance had already left D'Qar, and she could only hope that wouldn't blow back on her. They didn't know she was able to contact them. Hopefully when the time came she could brush it off as a coincidence. Perhaps she could convince them the planet was becoming too inconvenient for the Resistance and they needed something better. Perhaps it was only for the better they wouldn't tell her the new base. The less she knew the better.

"I guess that makes sense," she replied, trying not to sound too relieved. At least now the Resistance would have some time to relocate. She made a mental note to send them another message in the morning, figuring she couldn't take a shower a third time, and she needed the noise to avoid suspicions.

"I'm going to bed," Kylo said. "Are you coming as well?"

Nara's gaze shifted to the window. She hadn't noticed it was already that late.

"Just give me a second," she replied before slipping in the bathroom again to take off the towel and detangle her hair with her fingers. It was going to look like a mess in the morning, but that would be the least of her worries.

It felt wrong to press her body against his. For a reason it felt like she was betraying the Resistance even more. The longer she was with Kylo, and the more affection he gave her, the more she began to fall back in love with him. If only circumstances had been better. If only Snoke hadn't lured him to the dark side.

Kylo had his arm wrapped around her waist as he pushed his face in her damp hair. Her body fit perfectly into his, her back pressed against his chest. She could feel his breath on her skin as he increased his grip, pulling her even closer. The temperature of his body warmed her, and if Nara for a moment forgot what was happening all around her, she genuinely felt happy.

But the rest couldn't be forgotten. She tried to close her eyes countless times, but every time she saw Leia in front of her, trying to get as far away from D'Qar as possible. Next she saw Poe, struggling to organize the fleet of X-Wings for transportation. Every time she tried again she saw someone else she had betrayed.

Throughout the night Kylo released his grasp on her waist, turning his body as he let out a soft and long sigh. Nara switched positions, her eyes gliding over his frame, wondering what he was dreaming about. She saw the fingers of his hands twitch every now and again, his head sometimes shaking back and forth.

After all this time she still wasn't sure where his allegiance was. Sometimes she still saw the light in him, but more often than not he was consumed by darkness. Even after so much training it appeared that even Kylo Ren was still struggling with balancing the force, and in a way that soothed her. If he couldn't figure it all out, then she didn't have to feel bad for feeling conflicted as well.

When she saw the sun rising she realized she hadn't slept at all that night. Her body was tensed as she pushed herself upwards and positioned herself against the wall, her feet pulled up to her body. She wrapped her arms around her legs, resting her head on her knees as she watched the light slowly spread over the red clay. She still had no idea where they were, and she promised herself it would be her mission to find out as soon as possible. The Resistance needed something they could work with.

After they had breakfast Kylo told her he would be leaving for the day. He was being vague about the details, but when she saw him pull out his lightsaber as he got dressed she didn't feel bad about not having to come along. On the contrary, she was happy he was taking things slow with her again.

"Am I allowed to leave the room once you're gone?" Nara said as she watched him assemble his uniform, which proved to be more complicated than she had imagined.

Kylo looked up and ruffled his brows. "Of course you are. You're not a prisoner."

"I know I am," Nara nodded, although it felt good to hear him confirm it once more. "It's just that Hux doesn't particularly seems to like me. Would he mind if I walked around the base?"

He secured the belt that went around his hip, his fingers finding the clasp that made it stay in place.

"Hux doesn't like me either, don't take it personally," he spoke. "Don't get intimidated by him."

That was easier said than done. Whenever she saw him she felt like he was staring right through her lies and deceptions. If anything, she didn't want to be brought before Snoke ever again.

"Where are you going?" Nara asked.

Kylo had fully put on his attire, the only thing left to do was pull the hood over his head. The mask was still missing, but Nara didn't mind that it was. She preferred him without it.

"I'll tell you when I get back," he said as he moved towards her. "You'll be allowed to come on the next operation, I just think you need some time. I shouldn't have pushed you so hard for your first time. For a moment I forgot how little you know of the dark side."

Nara didn't want to go next time either. If it were up to here she would never join him in combat ever again, but she couldn't let her disappointment show. At least she was able to get out of it this time.

"Next time I'll be ready," she said, forcing a smile on her lips, hoping it looked somewhat convincing.

"I'll make sure you'll be," Kylo replied.

He leaned forward to kiss her goodbye.

She had spent the entire day exploring the base, getting lost twice before she was able to return to Kylo's room. The intricate web of corridors confused her every time, but at the end of the day she felt like she had gotten the hang of it.

Never during her time roaming the building had she ran into Hux, and Nara was very glad for it. The only encounters she had made was with stormtroopers who didn't seem to acknowledge her and commanding officers who simply nodded once as she passed by.

When she saw Captain Phasma standing in front of a glass window that covered the entire side of the building, Nara shuffled closer. She was watching her stormtroopers train in the red dust, keeping a close eye on their progressions.

Nara cleared her throat as she crossed her arms in front of her chest. Next to the shiny armor of the captain she felt painfully bare.

"Can I ask you something," she asked, her voice uneven and awkward. "Ma'am."

The stormtrooper turned her head towards her before turning it back to her troops, replying with a short and stern nod.

"Where are were?"

One of the stormtroopers threw the other one down on the ground, but Phasma didn't seem to be affected by it in any way.

"I mean, on what planet are we?"

"Why would you want to know?" Phasma replied, her voice booming.

"Curiosity," Nara stated.

Her gaze never left the troops training below, obviously deeming them to be more important than Nara.

"This planet has no name," she replied. "Uncharted territories."

She had no idea if what she was saying was true, but Nara could only take her word for it. Back when she was with the Resistance they had spoken about how the First Order was trying to colonize as much of the Unknown Regions as possible. Their empire had to start somewhere, and what better place than here?

"Anything else?" Phasma asked with a slight tone of annoyance to her voice.

Nara shook head head, answering her before she spun on her heel to return.

"Nope. That was all, thank you."

She was glad to see Kylo again. The moment she heard heavy footsteps approaching she knew it was him, but when he came in with his hand pressed to his side and struggled for the nearest chair, her smile disappeared.

"Did something happen?" Nara asked as she rushed forward, helping him down. Her eyes slid over his body, but it appeared that it was mostly the wound in his side that was a bothering him.

He shook his head in response before closing his eyes in pain when her fingers made him release the pressure on the wound so she could take a look, but through the thick black fabric she couldn't see much.

"You need to take off what you're wearing. I can't do anything now."

Nara was far from a good nurse, but she knew the basics and she was sure she could at least bandage the wound again.

"It's fine," Kylo protested, but Nara paid no mind to his comment and began free him from his uniform.

When she accidentally grabbed the lightsaber that hung from his hip an electric shock went through her body. Nara blinked a couple of times, wondering what just had happened before she quickly placed it on the table besides him.

"Oh," Nara exclaimed, as she frowned in disgust. Now that he was bare chested she could finally take off the bandages and see the extent of the wound, and it was very impressive. It wasn't until now she comprehended how much power Chewie's bowcaster had.

"How the hell are you able to withstand this pain?!"

But she already knew the answer. It was the darkness that was pulling him through, and she had no idea how.

"It's not that bad," Kylo mumbled, but Nara wanted to argue otherwise. Any normal person would surely have been in tremendous pain, or perhaps even died, but he was able to continue his duties without as much as complaining.

"You probably should seem a medic about this," Nara said, but when Kylo shook his head sternly she let out a sigh.

"You at least need a fresh bandage," she said. It was impossible to pull her gaze away from the damage that had been done to his body. She had seen the bandages before, but never had she figured it was this bad. Kylo had handled the pain so well she thought it was merely a scratch, but it was a serious flesh wound. If Chewie had aimed only an inch in the other direction he would have killed him.

"In that dresser," Kylo said as he nodded in the direction where she would find supplies.

Nara rushed to it, opening the metal drawers and began to rummage around until she found everything that she needed.

It didn't take her long to redo the bandage. The wound looked a lot less bad with fresh white gauze covering it, and Nara could see Kylo's body relaxing as the pain seemed to be leaving.

"What happened?" she tried again as she remained knelt down in front of him, her hand resting on his knees.

"Nothing happened. Don't worry about it," he replied. The color on his cheeks seemed to be returning. Nara had no idea what she had done but it seemed like it had worked.

"Then why did this wound suddenly hurt?" Nara continued, not ready to give up yet. She wanted to understand what he was going through, and he needed to let her in order for her to understand. Even though she was beginning to feel the pull of the dark side herself, she still understood little of it.

"I overworked my body," Kylo spoke, raising his eyebrows as his face turned soft. He leaned forward, his hand cupping her face.

"I am feeling better now. Thanks to you."

His smile was contagious, and when he stole her a quick kiss Nara felt the butterflies in her stomach rising. She was craving his affection more and more, and while it troubled her, she couldn't care less.

She couldn't hold herself back again. Her hands slipped further up his thigh, his muscles stiffening as her touch increased. For a moment she was scared he was going to stop her, but when his hands grabbed her by her hips and pulled her closer to him while leaning forward to let his lips crash against hers she knew he wanted this as badly as she wanted it.

It was as if he had forgotten about the pain of the wound as Kylo managed to pick her up. She wrapped her arms around his neck to stabilize herself as he moved closer to the bed, letting her fall backwards. She felt the need to be careful, not wanting to hurt or injure him any more, but when Kylo pressed his body against hers she knew it was alright to do what she wanted.

Their kiss deepened before Nara let out a soft sigh of pleasure. She couldn't even remember the last time they had done this, but she remembered all too well how much she had missed it.

She could feel the warmth of his body through his clothing. Nara wrapped her legs around his hips when he began to place gentle kisses in her neck.

"Stop it," Nara snickered as his lips brushed against her collarbone. She had always been ticklish and he had always been one to exploit it.

"You want me to stop?" Kylo said as he raised his head to let his gaze meet hers. A devilish grin was playing on his lips.

"Shut up," she replied, mimicking his smile before she kissed him again and her hands tried to undo his pants, ready to let her body melt into his.

A/N: So yeah. That happened. A number of people commented when it would happen but I had already planned to do it this chapter. Hopefully it didn't disappoint too much. This story is still rated T, so I couldn't take it too far. Just let your imagination fill in what happened after ;) (and honestly if it were rated M, I can't write explicit sex scenes to save my life so there's that).

Also, where do all those guest reviewers come from? Did someone rec my story somewhere or? Either way, I'm very happy you enjoyed this as much as you did! Your reviews are very much appreciated.

Finally I wanted to give you a little heads up that I sadly won't be able to update again this week due to commitments at university and work. I will of course write again as soon as I get the chance. I still have 3 finals coming up so that is taking more time than I expected. Hopefully you can understand.

As always, please leave your thoughts and thank you again for reading another chapter. Take care 3