Chapter Twenty-One
Backstreet Boys and Pillow Fights

Nothing says awkward like Xion. I don't know why I always get stuck watching her, I mean, I've made my distaste towards children blatantly obvious. Axel hasn't spoken a word to me, and if I stare at him long enough, I catch him right before he stares at me. I see his head slowly move, eyes trailing towards me and when he sees me watching back, he jerks away. I rest my chin in my palm and listen to Xion sing, trying to distract myself from staring at Axel. This is why she's making this situation so much more awkward than it has to be. With her headphones on, it seems like she's possessed by some annoyance demon. My aunt Aerith told me music would 'keep her occupied' which in her terms must mean, 'keep her still, but ten times louder'. There is just no in between with this kid.

"Quit playing games with my heart…with my heart!" Xion is horribly off key, and I know this because long ago, there were dark times. Dark, dark times I never speak of, the only trace of them ever existing is a collection of Backstreet Boys CDs in the basement. Which will never see the light of day ever again, might I add. "Before you tear us apart...my heart!"

I cringe as the little girl keeps singing, some people staring in our direction and I can't help but send them a pitying look. I can't do anything about her and I wish they just knew that. It's either we all listen to her sing, or I take the headphones off and unleash the hyperactive ten year old on the fifth floor. They have no clue what she's capable of, no fucking clue. Next thing you know, she's running into rooms tripping on life support cables and killing half the unit. Then they'd really hate me, so I decide I can deal with a few dirty looks, it's better than a mob.

Speaking of dirty looks, Axel is now completely avoiding looking at me and I wonder just what his problem is. I know I was trying not to look at him, but I can't help it. His question is still floating around in my head. 'Roxas…what's gonna happen between us?' I can't push it away, and I especially can't ignore the way it left my chest feeling. My heart is still thumping and every time I see Axel shift from my peripheral vision, it leaps and I think I'm having a mini heart attack. I keep thinking what I'm going to answer, to be honest I don't even have a clue what I was going to say before. Most of me wants to be with Axel, but there is still this tiny part telling me it's a bad idea. I can mostly ignore the little voice, so right there I decide if Axel is going to ask me out, I am going to say yes. That voice inside is screaming, I can practically feel it calling me a sicko. He's still my brother somehow right? Ah, I just don't know anything anymore.

"Quit playin' games with my heart! Na na na na na! Na na na na na baby! Na na na na na..."

I doubt my relationship status is going to change any time soon though, Xion serenading us and him looking like he can't even take the thought of sitting on the same strip of chairs as me. My stomach clenches and I have to worry, I mean, what if I finally pushed Axel away? I haven't been the most welcoming, nor have I been charming at all, so why would he even like me in the first place? I think I've finally gotten my wish of him never speaking to me again; the only problem is I don't want that anymore.

"Roxas…why is your face all bruised?" Xion's voice gathers my scattered brains and brings my attention down to her. I stare at her heart shaped face, her big, blue eyes blinking and beady. I remember then, that I had been punched in the face not too long ago. I lift my fingers and gingerly rub them over the sore spot. I can see Axel, sitting a little straighter, acting like he isn't really straining to hear. I lick my dry lips and shrug at the little girl. Judging by the way she tugs the headphones off and rests them around her neck, she isn't going to be dodged so easily. This is why I hate the fact that two smart people procreated. Xion is a major pain in the ass, I mean, aren't most ten year old girls too worried about Barbies to be analyzing people?

"I hit my face against a wall," I shrug again and feel self conscious as she stares at me with those bright eyes, almost like she can see right into my soul. I don't know why I have to explain myself to her anyway, what does she even know about having to tear two psycho delinquents apart? Nothing! This is so stupid that I even have to answer her. I cross my arms and send her a pointed look while she seems to not believe me. I hear Axel cough, covering his mouth probably to muffle a laugh. I decide I'm too old to be questioned by my little cousin and I tune them out, shutting my eyes and trying to not feel Xion's eyes on my skin.

The loud voice of Sora however, makes me open my eyes. I stare as he and Riku walk into the waiting room, my Uncle Leon and Aunt Betty a few paces behind, of course I remember now that my father told me they'd be coming. Sora waves at me ecstatically and I roll my eyes, not at all ready for his hyper active self so early on a bloody Tuesday. "Roxas! How are you? Is Aunt Sara okay?" Sora looks like he might burst into tears if I don't answer him, but I ignore him in favor of watching where Riku chooses to sit. I'm relieved to see him move and sit beside Axel, the redhead lifting his eyes to look at the other boy and thankfully doesn't lunge at his throat. I'm glad everything seems back to normal with them, I mean, that gives me one less thing to worry over. "Roxas?"

"Oh...yeah, I'm fine…my mom's okay. She's in the room with my dad, uncle Zack and Aunt Aerith," Both my uncle Leon and Aunt Betty nod and excuse themselves after I direct them to her room, leaving Sora and Riku out here in the waiting room with Axel, Xion and me. I suppose I have to take care of them too. See, I'm always left as a baby sitter.

"What happened?" Sora sits beside me and I stretch out, trying my best not to look at Axel. I fail miserably, as you probably already figured I would, and I watch him as he talks quietly to Riku. He looks over at me and I flush, turning my back to him and moving to face Sora. My cousin just stares at me, before shrugging off my weird behavior and waits for me to answer.

"She was hit by a van; the police are still looking for the driver though. I guess all that matters is that she's okay," I shrug my shoulders and Sora puts his hand gently over mine, which is fisted in the material of my school shirt. I find it unbelievably gross that I'm still in my uniform since early yesterday morning; it's been like 24 hours that I've been wearing this. I could really use a shower.

"Are you holding up okay? The guys and me were really worried," Sora frowns softly before continuing, "We were texting you to find out what happened, but you wouldn't answer your cell…how's your face?" he can't hide the grin that spreads across his mouth when he spots the Mickey mouse bandage still in place and I lift my fingers to smooth it down though it's still practically glued to my skin. My face is still a little sore from the hit, but it's nowhere near as bad as yesterday. I mean, yesterday my brain felt like scrambled eggs.

I reach into my back pocket, Sora just reminding me of my cell phone and the screen shows me I have around 18 new messages and one missed call. My eyes widen and Sora peeks over, laughing when he sees why I made such a weird face. "Yeah, told you we were worried," most of the messages are from Sora, Naminé and Olette. Hayner just sent me two, asking if I was skipping and if I was, I was a dick head. Pence is the one who called, but didn't bother leaving me a voicemail. He knows I never check those things. I feel touched really, that my friends would worry so much and I smile at Sora.

"Sorry, I was caught up in my mom's stuff…I'm fine, honest…" Sora just takes notice of Xion and he smiles at her, the little girl has never been too fond of him, so it's not a surprise when she puts her headphones back on and moves a few seats away taking up her horrible squawking again. Sora scrunches his nose in distaste before looking back at me and I shrug. "She just doesn't like you," I laugh when he rolls his eyes. I don't think he likes her either.

"How are you and Axel?" He wiggles his eyebrows and I swat at him, my hand slapping against his arm and making him cry out. He rubs the offended spot and pouts at me while I cross my arms over my chest. Serves him right for being such a pervert, if he thinks I don't know what those eyebrows mean, he's got another thing coming.

"He isn't talking to me…I don't think he likes me anymore," It's with a heavy heart that I admit this and I think Sora notices because he looks shocked, his mouth forming a little 'O' as he tries to see the two boys behind us from over my shoulder, he pats my shoulder and smiles softly as if to comfort me. "How about you and Riku?" Sora's face turns bright red and my eyes widen as he slowly tries to meet my gaze after looking away.

"Uh…well…" Sora is actually embarrassed. This is something I'll remember forever because it's only a handful of times that I've ever seen him flustered and I have really small hands. He tugs on his shirt collar and coughs into his fist, mumbling something against his hand and I raise an eyebrow at him, really thrown off by his weird behavior. I'm getting a weird sense of déjà vu, because the hand full of times that I've seen him flustered all had something in common…I just can't seem to remember…

"Well? What happened? Did you guys talk it out?" When Sora does this creepy, nervous chuckle, I feel sort of sick. My lips pull back from my teeth and I think Sora thinks I'm going to throw up because he lifts his legs away from me. That little chuckle has to be the worst thing you could possibly hear coming from Sora. It's only shown up the same number of times he's ever been flustered, and he's only ever been flustered well…when he has to tell me about…certain things. Ugh, why did I even have to remember!

"Sorta…" he bursts out laughing when I gag loudly, slapping his arm again and causing Riku and Axel to look towards us, Sora laughing so hard he's almost choking and I'm trying to stop my brain from processing this information. If it's not too late to forget he ever said anything, I'd like to make sure it's wiped from my memory but sadly I can't. I heard it, and his laughing is just the seal that makes it official. Gross, Sora and Riku…had sex. Oh my god.

"With Uncle Leon and Aunt Betty in the house?" I hiss, dragging him across his seat and towards me by his collar, he laughs before trying to pry my fingers out of his shirt. I can tell he's trying really hard with no success, so I let go and he fixes the material before looking at me again, his cheeks still a little red.

"Of course not dummy! It was one of their date nights, so my dad dragged my mom out of the house to get her mind off Aunt Sara's accident. Your dad had told her she couldn't visit until today anyway," Sora shrugs but there's this stupid, little grin on his face that makes him look like a gremlin. "It was better than how I'd imagined it," his eyes glaze over and I gag again, smacking him out of his corrupt day dream.

"I'm going to completely ignore this entire conversation for the rest of my life," I cast a quick look over my shoulder to see if Axel and Riku had been listening but they haven't, instead they are too busy talking. I figure even if they had tried to listen, Xion's obnoxious singing would have drowned out mine and Sora's conversation anyway.

"Oh come on Roxas, you can't tell me you haven't pictured doing Axel at least once," Sora has enough sense to whisper this to me, but it doesn't make it any less disturbing or any less appalling. I stare at my cousin like he just sprouted another head and all he does is smile cheekily at me, looking almost certain of this. I may have pictured Axel naked a few times (a lot) but not once, never ever, have I pictured us having sex. My cheeks feel hot and my stomach twists just thinking about, thinking about it. "My little prude cousin," Sora laughs at me as I just sigh; I'm giving up fighting against his virgin jokes.

After enduring torture from Sora and Xion for almost the entire day, my aunts and uncles finally spill out into the hallway, my father escorting them towards the waiting room where Aerith comes to pick up a slumbering Xion. I don't know exactly what time it is, but I know it's late and I watch as Riku and Axel walk towards the crowd coming back from a walk they decided to take like 3 hours ago, Riku yawning tiredly but of course Axel doesn't.

"Alright, we're going home," My uncle Zack announces, grabbing his little girl from a struggling Aerith and promising my dad to visit tomorrow and whenever he can, Aerith kisses my dad's cheek, telling him to call her should he need anything at all. Finally, they're gone and Aunt Betty smiles at me, beckoning me over.

"Axel and you are coming with us, we're taking you boys home," My dad smiles when he sees me about to complain, cutting off anything I have to say with a wave of his hand.

"Roxas, I'm going to be staying here with your mother, don't worry. Axel and you however, have school to attend and showers to take. You can drop by after school tomorrow and I'll call you later tonight," My father is begging me not to argue with him, his tired face making my heart twist up painfully and I just can't keep quiet. I don't want to leave him here alone.

"But dad, you're gonna be all alone," I frown and he just shakes his head, ruffling my hair before placing a hand on Axel's shoulder, the redhead is almost taller than my dad.

"I'm with your mother Roxas, besides, you've already missed enough school. Go on now, get a good night's rest," my father winks at us as my Aunt and Uncle lead us downstairs towards the car. Leaving him in that waiting room just tears up my insides and I find it hard to swallow all the tears. I feel Axel looking at me and I think I'd be okay if he'd just hug me. I look up hoping that he'll comfort me, but instead he looks away, shoving his hands in his pockets and I frown, feeling even worse than before.

Sora and Riku are walking behind us, giggles and low murmurs filling the air and I can't resist taking a peek. They're holding hands and are huddled close, Riku mumbling something into Sora's ear and making my cousin laugh and giggle like a little girl. I ignore the pang in my chest and quicken my steps, falling along side my Aunt Betty, the petite woman putting her arm around my shoulders and finally someone hugs me. I'm not the most fond of physical affection, but there are just time when you need it more than anything else. We stay like this until we reach the car, Riku and Sora quickly climbing into the very last seats, leaving Axel and me to sit together in the middle.

I hate the world so much right now.

The drive home is quiet, finally Sora isn't talking but I'm worried why. I'm not brave enough to chance a look back, too afraid of what I'll see. I mean, hopefully Sora wouldn't be so gross as to make out with Riku in his parent's car, but sometimes you just can't tell with my cousin. I think it's safer to just mind my own business and keep watching the back of my aunt's seat. Axel hasn't shifted, his foot the only thing in constant motion, tapping out some unknown beat. I wonder what he's thinking about, but that could be anything. I suddenly remember how pale he had been inside Ansem's office and I lean over, clearing my throat before speaking. "Axel…why'd you look so scared at Ansem's?" I feel stupid for such a pathetic conversation topic, but when the redhead turns and looks at me, I realize I'm desperate enough to try anything.

"He looks just like Xemnas…" the way the redhead says the name makes my skin crawl, every single syllable is dripping with hatred, almost as if saying the word leave a putrid taste in his mouth. I blink, almost too afraid to ask who that is, but luckily he figures I wouldn't know, so he tells me. "Xemnas used to be my boss…yah know…when I was in the gang," His whispers are almost hard to hear, but judging by Aunt Betty's soft snores we don't have to worry about her. Uncle Leon is too concentrated on driving, but it's better safe than sorry I guess.

"Oh," it's all I can say, and as I expected my pathetic little conversation dies just as we pull into our drive way. Uncle Leon turns and smiles at me, pressing the button to unlock my door.

"Now Roxas, don't hesitate to come over or call if you need anything, we're just next door," I nod my head and thank my uncle, sliding out of the car and Axel following close behind. We stay outside long enough to watch my uncle drive the short distance into his own garage and then we head inside. The silence of the house is familiar, so walking in isn't as bad as I had thought it would be. I'm used to the place being so silent, only now I know that my parent's should be home and that they aren't working. I guess that's what makes it a little depressing to be in here, never once had I thought about the sad emptiness my house has without them in it.

"Hey Roxas…hey, don't get all slobbery," Axel wipes his thumb across my cheek and I realize I let the water works go. I quickly rub the rest off and clear my throat deciding it's time to get ready for bed or something as I kick off my shoes, Axel following my lead and we both move towards the stairs. "Meet me in the living room after, okay?" I look at him like he's crazy but all he does is smile. I guess it wouldn't do any harm to humor him, so reluctantly I agree and we both head into our rooms to shower and get ready.

My stomach is constantly flipping, my mind drawing blanks every time I try and imagine just what Axel wants to do. I feel nervousness inside of me at the thought of maybe having to speak about my feelings. I don't want to have to admit them out loud, but I'll do it if I have too. Filled with anxiety I step into the shower and the rest is a rushed progress. I can't wait to just get downstairs and see what Axel wants.

Fucking Charades? This is what he called me down here for, what I bit my nails over! A fucking game of charades? I groan as I drop onto the couch, Axel laughing as he stands in front of me and shoves the coffee table out of the way. I can't believe I actually agreed to this. I feel stupid for even worrying in the first place, Axel's probably given up on me anyway. If only I would have been a little nicer…

"Okay so, Imma stop talkin' now," His smile is so big and bright, I have trouble focusing on his crazy hand gestures. When I do concentrate even a little, I still can't make out what the hell he wants me to figure out. I furrow my eyebrows as he acts it out, nothing even coming to mind.

"Uh…sounds like…?" I blink a few times when Axel flails his arms around, trying hard not to laugh when he acts out like he's riding a horse…I think.

Okay, this is just ridiculous. Axel has to be the worst charades player on the planet, and if I laugh any harder my stomach is going to cramp up forever. I can't stop though, because I just can't seem to get any guesses as to just what he's supposed to be. I wipe a few stray tears from my cheeks and watch him as he stomps, groans and acts it out again. "I swear you're just makin' me do this to laugh," he glares at me and I shake my head, laughter bubbling in the pit of my stomach as I watch him do it all over again.

"N-no, I swear…" He rolls his eyes and does more weird motions with his arms, his green eyes staring at me the entire time and I'm fighting tooth and nail to stop myself from laughing. "Why would you want to play charades if you suck at it?" I can't hold it in anymore, I laugh so hard I topple off the couch and Axel grabs a throw pillow to beat me with. I never expected him to be the pillow fight type, but when the soft cushion smacks into my face, it's instinct to reach for the other and swing back.

Now, before you go thinking, "How much GAYER can this get?" I should tell you that my pillow fights in the past have been nothing short of gory. Hayner went home with a black eye once, and Sora…well, let's just say he shoves bricks in his, or at least it feels that way. Axel sees me start to get up and smacks me back down with his pillow before darting out of the living room. Oh, it is so on.

"It was The Little Mermaid, by the way!" he shouts as he disappears from my view and I jump to my feet.

He's a slippery bastard, resorting to hiding. I stand in the foyer, looking around but I can't even hear anything. My heart is thumping crazily and I realize trying to find Axel is going to be like looking for a needle in a haystack. His footsteps are phantom-like, so I can't rely on hearing to find him. I don't even know where to start! Just as I'm about to go into the kitchen, he runs out of the closet and whacks me on the back of the head with his pillow, making me stumble forward a few paces. I turn just as he's running at me and lift my pillow, swinging it and smacking him right on the side. He laughs before going for another hit, but I block him. This turns into an all out pillow war, I swear there's a few feathers floating around and each hit echoes through out the house. I hit him so hard he falls flat on his ass, looking up at me with round, shocked eyes.

"Holy shit Blondie, you packin' rocks in that thing?" he laughs and I hug my pillow close, smiling at him over the top of it. He gets up, but we're both too tired to keep beating each other senseless with cushions. "Alright, it's a draw?" He sticks his hand out for me to shake but I just stare at it.

"A draw! I clearly kicked your ass," I smile at him, shaking his hand and he just rolls his eyes before smirking. I'm about to ask what's so funny when he smacks me upside the head with his pillow, grabbing mine and ripping it out of my arms. I shout, trying to grab them but he throws them both too far, but not far enough! I can run to them, but by the time that idea is set in my mind, he's winding his arms around my waist and keeping me firmly in place. I struggle a bit, laughing but when I feel his warm breath tickle the back of my ear, I freeze. Holy shit…

"How're you feeling?" he whispers quietly and I stare down at his hands, long, spindly fingers intertwined and resting on my belly. My heart just gave up by now, not even beating anymore or maybe beating too fast for me to feel. I can't tell, my entire body is tingling and my brain…well it's just being a pervert.

The picture of my parents reminds me why we played charades in the first place and I swallow, searching for an answer to Axel's question. How am I feeling? I don't even know. I'm a little worried about my mother, hoping she'll get better soon and I'm not worried about my father, I just hope he's alright. I chew on my bottom lip, squirming a little until I turn and face him, my own arms resting awkwardly at my sides. I don't know what to do with them, until I spot a few feathers in Axel's hair. I lift my hand shakily to take them out, plucking them from the sea of red gently "I'm…okay…thanks to you," I smile a little sheepishly and Axel's eyes widen before he laughs.

"Never thought I'd hear those words comin' outta your mouth," His grin is wide and happy, as so close, making me almost blush. He's right here, in front of me, only a few inches away and I can kiss him. He stops smiling down at me and just stares quietly, his head dipping a little lower and I can almost feel his mouth against mine. My entire body is buzzing with anticipation, my fingers curling into his hair.

"ROXAS!" My front door slams open, causing both Axel and I to fly apart and I turn to stare at Sora and Riku as they walk in with a pizza. Sora stares at me curiously, while I place curse upon curse on both of their fucking asses. "We come bearing gifts and such, mom told me to come over, cheer you right up!" he smiles like moment-ruiner he is and I nod my head, making my way towards the kitchen on stiff legs.

God damn it, why are people always barging into my house, screaming my name?

A/N: QUIT PLAYIN' GAMES WITH MY HEART!

Anyway, you guys can look forward to some Roxas/Axel bonding time!
I have some ridiculous ideas in mind to embarrass the SOCKS off Roxas 8D
So, y'all look forward to that ;D

Also...when will Axel pop the big Q! Well, I dunno 8D
Buahahahahaa

- Peace out, Sharmander!