88. Exhilaration 89. Mortification
Warnings: 88 includes mild language and mild descriptions of injuries. 89 includes mild language and mild romantic content. Over all it's pretty... mild.
Exhilaration
Shadan wasted no time. Before the last droid had hit the floor of the interrogation room, the Jedi was slashing through the restraints that held one of his men suspended.
"Taggart's squad, guard the door. Pierce, with me. The rest of you report to Captain Blue and help search for the others," Shadan ordered as he caught the suspended trooper and lowered him gently to the floor. Shanks was in bad shape: pale as a sheet and burning with fever. A lump of dread formed in Shadan's throat when he saw the lack of movement in the trooper's chest, but before he could examine Shanks, Pierce was crowding him out so that he could check the man's vitals.
"Shab!" Pierce cursed. He tore open Shanks' body-glove and began chest compressions. "Strax! Shanks is in cardiac arrest. He need defib now. See what you can find."
"Sir!" Strax immediately left his post at the door and set about locating the equipment. Shadan watched his progress for a moment, then turned to watch Pierce.
"Come on, Shanks, hold on." The medic's ministrations were beginning to break Shanks' ribs. Shadan winced at the sound of cracking bone, and at the fear radiating from Pierce and the rest of the men. It reminded him of a Force power he had learned on his own, back in his youngling days. Before Master Windu had caught him, he'd been studying how to control the frequency of…
"No luck, sir!" Strax reported. "I found some paddles, but they're useless. Looks like they got caught in the crossfire when we were slagging the droids."
"Look again! Check adjoining rooms if you have to!"
"Belay that. Private, return to your post," Shadan ordered. Strax froze, conflicted, but begrudgingly obeyed. Pierce on the other hand…
"What the hell, Shadan?!"
"Stand clear, Captain."
"No! I am NOT giving up on him! There's still a chance!"
"What frequency do you need?"
"What?"
"What frequency?"
Pierce's glare was almost as dour as Hawkbat's. "250."
"Stand clear." Pierce obeyed this time, but stayed nearby, ready to pounce at the first opportunity. Shadan ignored him. He closed his eyes and held his hands out in front of him, breathing slowly and deeply. He tamped down on the sense of unease he felt at revisiting this technique. He had to do it. He was desperate.
Shadan melted into the Force, his minds' eye filled with the swirling colors of life. He resisted the urge to bathe in the serene, safe curls of blue and purple, instead seeking out the darker hues. He focused on his fear, his pain, and that of his men: the righteous anger at the fate of their comrade. The emotions spilled into him: turbid water into a rippling pond, and he nurtured them, pushed them. Red exploded in his vision, and fire in his veins. He could feel every beat of his heart, every milliliter of blood in every capillary. His fear and anger fed on each other, melding into something like euphoria. A taste caressed his tongue: sweet and delicious and nauseating and rotten. Just as he thought he would burst, he dropped his hands to Shanks' chest and released. Blue tongues of lightning crackled over the clone and his body jerked, then lay still.
Vaguely Shadan was aware of Pierce's voice. "Nothing. Try again, General."
The Force was still buzzing in Shadan's ears, and the lightning came more easily this time, as the Jedi luxuriated in the beautiful agony of emotions in and around him. Another jerk. The body remained still.
"Again!"
Fear began to overtake anger. The hot joy faded, replaced with a cold, clammy hand around his heart. It wasn't working! He couldn't lose Shanks now! Not after all this! Adrenaline coursed through his system, and with a desperate cry of pain and terror he sent one last burst of lightning coursing through Shanks' body.
Coughing erupted from the man sprawled on the floor, followed by groans. Shadan opened his eyes. Shanks' face was contorted in pain, and his eyes were bloodshot and glassy, but he was alive.
With some difficulty, Shanks focused his eyes on Shadan. "General?"
Blood still laden with adrenaline and natural narcotics, Shadan gave a rather undignified whoop and narrowly prevented himself from slapping poor Shanks on the shoulder.
"You're alive!"
"Copy that, sir." Shanks smiled weakly and Shadan laughed with relief. He didn't react when Peirce elbowed him away so that he could tend to his patient, or when Strax left his post to assist.
As the adrenaline and endorphins left his system, though, euphoria faded. He stood to give the medics room to work, as well as to give himself space to think. He couldn't help but feel ashamed. He had used a technique that he had been expressly forbidden to use by the second most powerful Jedi in the order. It had saved a life, and he would do it again in a heartbeat if it meant that more of his men would come home, but… He shuddered as he felt the taint of the dark side – real or imagined, he wasn't sure – clinging to him like a second skin.
"General?" Shadan turned to see Pierce regarding him carefully. He must have scared the man badly for him to turn his attention away from his patient. Shadan realized for the first time that he was flushed, trembling, and drenched in sweat. He must be a sight.
"I'm fine, Captain."
"Osik."
Shadan smiled ruefully. "I will be fine," he amended. "I just need a moment."
Pierce frowned dubiously, but returned to binding Shanks' ribs. Shadan trudged over to a corner of the interrogation room, slumped to the floor with is head in his hands, and tried to meditate. With a little effort, he was back amid the peaceful blue, purple and green eddies of the Force. But the colors weren't quite as bright as they had been before.
Mortification
Aww… Kriffin' hell.
Rex hadn't meant to intrude; he'd just come to fetch his general back form the Senate apartments to The Resolute. But apparently the universe was not in a good mood with him today.
It seemed Anakin Skywalker had been on his way to The Resolute, because he and Senator Amidala were already in the doorway of her apartment when Rex rounded the corner. Rex hadn't been fully paying attention, and had already raised his fist to knock when he noticed them standing there, bodies entwined and lips locked in a passionate kiss.
The general, of course, sensed his presence and broke off the embrace, whirling on Rex in surprise. The senator followed a second later, cheeks blossoming pink with embarrassment. She retreated a step back into her rooms, but Anakin stood his ground, eyes hard.
"Captain," he said, "What are you doing here?"
The stern question broke Rex out of his stupor. "Sir!" he exclaimed, snapping to attention and hastily saluting, clonking himself pretty hard on the forehead in the process. He'd forgotten he wasn't wearing his helmet. After staggering back and staring incredulously at his gauntlet, he returned to official stance, more carefully this time. "The Resolute is prepped to go and awaiting you, sir!" Rex wished he could pop his bucket back on. His face was flaming and streaming with sweat.
General Skywalker took a menacing step forward. "Rex, if you tell anyone about this…"
"Anakin." Senator Amidala's hand on his shoulder halted the General's advance. He turned back to her and the two locked eyes. After a moment, Skywalker snorted and stalked back into the apartment. Amidala sighed in exasperation, then smiled at Rex.
"Come inside, captain. Have a seat."
"Yes, ma'am." She led him to a comfortable chair in the front room, and then exited to the kitchen. The general must have been in there too, because muffled conversation drifted through the door. Rex shuffled his feet, feeling distinctly awkward.
The room wasn't very big, he supposed. Not that he was in any position to judge. He only really knew barracks and various rooms aboard starships. Barracks were tiny, of course: meant to house the maximum number of men in the minimum amount of space. Even as a Captain, his personal space was limited. Other shipboard rooms had to be large enough to house various types of equipment, as well as accommodate the easy movement of countless men. The color was nice too: a pleasant blue rather than the uniform and inexpensive whites and grays that Rex was used to. The carpet was plush, the air scented with perfumes and pleasantly cool… all in all it was a very nice place. Very fitting for the Naboo senator…
Rex was jerked out of his musings as the kitchen door opened, admitting the General and Senator. Rex started to rise.
"Sit down, Rex," General Skywalker said wearily as he and Amidala lowered themselves into a loveseat across of Rex. Rex complied, but remained stiff and upright in his chair.
After an awkward pause, Senator Amidala smiled at him. "Captain," she said, "allow me to introduce my husband: Anakin Skywalker."
Rex's mouth fell open. Husband? But the general was a Jedi! Jedi didn't… and with the senator?
"H-how long?" Rex's mouth acted before his brain could catch up, and he winced. "Sorry ma'am, sir. It's none of my business…"
But the General chuckled. "Just after Geonosis," he said, taking the Senator's hand with a fond smile. He then turned back to Rex, his expression grave.
"Rex," he said. "You can't tell anybody about this."
Rex glanced at the ground, unconsciously chewing his lip in consternation. It was an order from a superior officer, and… and a request from a friend. He wanted to obey, to keep his general's trust. But did he dare keep something like this a secret?
Rex took a deep breath and returned his gaze to the general and senator. "Technically, sir, the army's non-fraternization regulations regarding civilians only apply to clones. And Jedi… Jedi rules aren't really my concern."
Senator Amidala gave a delighted gasp and Skywalker grinned with relief. He leaned over and gave Rex a friendly slap on the shoulder-bell.
"Thanks, Rex. Really."
"Not a problem sir."
Author's note: Mortification was not on the original emotions list, but I swapped it in because I was inspired after writing "Alarm" to delve into just how Rex found out about Anakin and Padme. Also… it seems I really like making clones feel awkward ;) Exhilaration ended up turning out a bit gloomier than originally intended, but oh well. Happy Holidays everyone! :)