It's so hard for me to say this
I'm struggling to find the right words
What I've felt is past tense
What I feel you just haven't heard

So, I think it's better that I tell you now
I think it's better that I tell you now

I Think It's Better, Jill Scott

So, this is what it was going to come to. Brian Johnson was both an academic failure and social blunder at the age of fifteen.

He'd gotten through the rest of shop class last year okay, with Bender's influence and a little bit of his assistance as well, and he was even a little bit thankful for that F by now, because without it there would be no best friend and no Claire and no Saidie.

But there was no Saidie now, anyway, it seemed.

Since the start of the new school year, Brian and Saidie had never gotten to see all that much of each other at school. They didn't have English class together anymore, and Saidie, while in most advanced classes, didn't take advanced math and science like Brian (her worst, most hated subjects, she told him). And during lunch Saidie went home and Brian ate with his academic friends or with Bender. So it shouldn't have surprised him that he went a couple of days, at time, without seeing her inside Shermer High.

But now it seemed like she was outright avoiding him.

The last time he'd seen her, he'd stopped by her locker to say hello, and she'd smiled and told him she had something to ask him when they met up after school to go to the diner. He couldn't wait to hear what it was, but he never did. She didn't show at their usual meeting spot.

Eventually Brian, defeated, had given up and walked home, wondering what was going on. But it hadn't taken him long to figure out what it must have been that she'd planned on asking him, because Claire called him that night.

"Brian! Are you excited? Are you, like, totally nervous? I am. But I think it'll be fun." She babbled.

"Nervous? About what?"

"About Halloween! You know, about the double date to Bender's hangout. Me, you and Bender and Saidie?"

"Um, what double date?"

"You mean Saidie didn't ask you? Bender told me she was going to."

"Nope. She was supposed to meet me after school, and she said she was going to ask me something. But she didn't show up."

Oops. That's when it all came back to Claire. Saidie crying on the school steps while waiting for her father. Claire was now starting to think those tears definitely had something to do with Brian.

"Brian, are you okay?"

Brian was quiet. Then, he cleared his throat and asked, "Claire? Should I call her?"

Part of Claire wanted to say no. Because another conversation was replaying in her head. One that she was going to have to deal with tomorrow. But she sighed and said, "Um, I think you better."

The two friends hung up the phone shortly after. Claire was expecting a phone call from Bender, and Annabelle after that.

Annabelle. That was a situation she had no idea how to deal with. When Annabelle had revealed her crush on Brian, Claire didn't know how to respond. She didn't have to. Annabelle had said, "Look, don't say anything now. Just let it sink in. We'll talk about it another time."

Claire had just nodded and they'd continued the rest of short ride in silence.

The next day, Brian was waiting for Claire at her locker when she arrived. He looked like he was about to jump out of his skin, and Claire knew it was because this was the first real time they were interacting at school. Where people might see.

But Claire had long since almost completely stopped caring. She had her growing affection for Bender, and her strengthening friendship with Annabelle, to thank for that.

And besides, she loved Brian. He was becoming one of her closest friends. She wasn't going to tear him down in front of Benny, or Erica, or anyone.

She smiled reassuringly at him. "Hi, Brian."

"Um, hi, Claire." He said, stumbling over his words again and looking quite nervous. Claire giggled to see that underneath the new clothes and the more attractive Brian, he was still the same sweet, lovable, awkward guy.

"What's up?" she asked.

"Um, I-I tried to call her. Saidie. She wouldn't come to the phone."

Claire frowned. "What do you mean? She wasn't there?"

"No, her m-mom said she was going to go get her, and then I heard her talking to someone, and then Judge Heyer came back and said Saidie must have just stepped out."

Claire mouthed an, "Oh."

Brian nodded and blushed. "I know…I-I know she couldn't have had plans, because, um, well, because she was supposed to be out with me."

"Well, maybe she went to go see Bender." Claire said, trying to be optimistic for her friend.

But Brian knew that Bender had gone to work last night. He hadn't told Claire about his job, yet. He was still trying to figure out the "right" way to tell her, he'd confessed to Brian.

"Did you, um, talk to…talk to him last night?" Brian asked.

"Yeah. Late. He said he was tired, so we didn't talk long. He didn't mention anything about Saidie, though." Claire said, regretfully.

Brian finally looked up and met Claire's eyes. He looked like he desperately wanted to ask her something, but couldn't quite find the words.

That's when Annabelle and Caroline showed up. Both Claire and Annabelle had started to separate themselves, just slightly, from Erica and Charlotte, and were spending more time with Caroline and, in Claire's case, Sloane from time to time. They were much easier to get along with.

"Hi, Claire!" Annabelle said, sounding more like an Erica clone than she had in a long time.

"Um, hi." Claire said, smiling so her friend wouldn't know anything was wrong.

Caroline and Annabelle exchanged a look, and then Caroline said to Claire about Brian, "I didn't know you two knew each other." She turned to look at Brian, flipping her long blond hair.

"Hi again, Brian. You're a hard guy to pin down." She said.

Brian blushed furiously. "Um, h-hi." He couldn't believe two of Claire's rich, popular friends were speaking to him.

"Brian, I've been looking everywhere for you. You left science class so early yesterday, I didn't get to speak to you again."

"Um…." Brian said, giving Annabelle a dumbfounded look.

"Caroline and I wanted to know if you'd hang out with us after school."

"Oh. Um, o-okay," he replied, assuming that they were being nice to him to get help on homework or something. "I, um I don't know how much help I can be, because I'm only a sophomore and I don't take—"

Caroline and Annabelle giggled. Claire watched the scene in front of her and began to feel uneasy. This wasn't the Annabelle she'd started to see over the past few weeks. Here they were, flirting with Brian and fawning all over him, just because he'd made a few changes to his dress style and his appearance. If they hadn't liked the way he looked now, they'd still be making fun of him the way they did with the other "academic dweebs".

"—This isn't about homework, silly. We just want you to go shopping with us. Come on, walk to class with us." Caroline said, taking charge. She nudged Annabelle, who linked her arm through Brian's. Claire glared at him. But he didn't seem to notice. The guy was in seventh heaven. And, as disappointed as Claire wanted to be, she couldn't quite blame him. She knew that every guy in school wanted to be with girls like them. Especially Annabelle, the doe-eyed, sensitive, long-legged brunette; and Caroline, the well-developed blonde bombshell. And after all, Brian was only a guy.

But no. Claire remembered the Brian from detention. The guy who had called her out on being conceited. The guy who had been disgusted with her when she said that his friends looked up to her.

That's who Brian was deep down. And that guy would never fall for the ditzy girl act. He'd never trade a real, caring girlfriend for the chance to be made popular by Caroline and Annabelle.

"Um, Brian, what about your—" She started to say.

But Caroline cut her off. "—Claire come on, we don't want to be late." The two girls took off, with Brian between them, and Claire had no choice but to follow.

At one point they walked past where Bender and Saidie and Freddie were standing, talking together. Brian tried to catch Saidie's eye and speak to her, but she turned away from him quickly.

Claire noticed this and met Bender's eye. She raised her eyebrows at her boyfriend, and he just shrugged. Claire sighed, shrugged back, and tilted her head as a way of saying goodbye to him, before following behind her three friends.

She and Bender, since they'd started dating, had gotten really good at having conversations at school without saying any actual words to each other, or without anyone even knowing that they were communicating at all. Claire loved their secret conversations and way of communicating. Not so much because she was afraid to be seen with him at school, but because it made her feel close to Bender. Connected to him.

Once Claire and the others had walked off, Bender poked Saidie.

"Ow!" she said.

"You deserve it. Saidie, why the fuck are you doing this? Why don't you just talk to him?' Bender asked.

"I told you. It's over."

"He doesn't seem to know that." Freddie chimed in.

"Well, he will. I heard them, guys. I heard that Annabelle girl talking in the girls' locker room about how she was going to make him all popular, and how she was going to ask him out."

"So? Tell the bitch to back off. Tell her he's taken." Freddie said.

Saidie shook her head. "Do you really think he'd choose me over her? Get real, guys. Look, I know that we don't care about being popular, but not everyone is like us." She looked directly at Bender. "You know as well as I do that guys like that worship…well, girls like that. Once she asked him out, how long did you think it would be before he dumped me?"

Bender rolled his eyes. "Hey. Shit for Brains. Big Bri actually likes you. At the moment I'm not sure why, because you're being a fucking mental case, but he does. Trust me on this. And believe me when I tell you, you're screwing up."

But Saidie was defiant. "Look at how happy he was just now. They're obviously already going out. I just saved him the trouble of having to break up with me. It was a bad idea in the first place." She slammed her locker shut, and started to walk off, her two friends following behind her.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Bender asked.

"Look. You told me that you're pretty sure he'd never had a girlfriend before right?"

"Yeah? So?"

"So, okay. I was convenient. I liked him, he wanted a girlfriend. Fine. It was fun while it lasted. But that's all I probably was to him. A convenient opportunity. Why would he waste his time on me now, when girls like Annabelle McClain are interested in him? We've seen it before, Bender. You know? The smart guy ends up rich and successful with a beautiful trophy wife. Not with the weird chick from high school. I mean, look at my parents." She turned to Freddie. "Look at your grandparents."

Bender couldn't even respond. He knew exactly where she was coming from. These was the same insecurities he'd gone through in his head a thousand times about his own relationship with Claire.

But Claire was showing him every day that she didn't think like that. She'd accepted his invitation to the Halloween party. She'd been so sweet to him. She had also recently started talking about how she had a friend she wanted to officially introduce him to. He knew Claire didn't think like that.

And he was even more certain that Brian didn't think like that. He'd heard the dweebie say that he'd never take any of Claire's friends seriously, not in that way. And he had seen the way Brian looked at Saidie. Hell, often Bender was embarrassed for him. No way was he dating Saidie out of convenience. Guys that were dating girls out of convenience didn't look at them like they were fucking angels sent down from heaven. And they certainly didn't come out of closets with said girl, looking as if they wanted to eat said girl up. Bender hadn't said anything, but he'd noticed Brian looking at Saidie like that. He knew that was how Brian felt about her, even if Brian himself didn't know it. Because that was the way he felt about Claire.

He wasn't used to this insecure side of Saidie. He didn't like it. Something had to be done.

As they reached Saidie's classroom, she handed him one of Brian's wristbands. Bender had been with him when Brian bought them. He'd bought three sets, to match some of his "cool" T-shirts, and told Bender that he planned on giving one to Saidie to wear, so she had something of his.

"Could you give this back to him, please? That way….that way, he'll know." She said, shoving it into his hand and running off into class before Bender could have the chance to stop her.

Yep. Something had to be done.