Chapter Twenty-One: Think Of Me
*more spoilers for Kill Ari*
Think of me
Think of me fondly,
when we've said goodbye
Remember me
once in a while-
please promise me you'll try
Why'd she do it? Why did she leave him? She… she shouldn't have. She was still in love with him! She had left him a letter telling him she was leaving, and she wished she had added a few more things to the letter.
Like to think of her. Even if it's thoughts of hate, at least to think about her and the good times they had. Marseilles, Paris, Serbia, the list goes on. All of the cities filled with sweet memories. Hopefully, he would think of her. Even if it's only a couple of times a year, it would be something.
When you find that once again you long
to take your heart back and be free
If you ever find a moment
Spare a thought for me…
Would he like to see her ever again? Would he try and fight for her to return? Her question was answered when she met up with Ducky a few months after she left him.
"Jennifer," he said sorrowfully. "I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but…"
"Ducky, is he okay?" Jenny asked, her voice cracking a little.
Ducky knew exactly who she was talking about. "He's fine, Jennifer. It's just that… well… here," he said, pulling an envelope out of his pocket and handing it to her.
You're Invited! was scrawled on the front of the envelope in Jethro's familiar handwriting. She opened it up and pulled out a small card, reading it.
Dear Ducky,
You're invited to another wedding, Duck. Remember Stephanie Flynn? Yeah, well, now we're getting married. It might seem soon, but it feels right. And don't go on about that crap about it being a rebound! I'm over Jen. Yeah, so, wedding's on November 8th at 14:00. Hope you can make it. It's at the church down the street from my house. You know what I mean. We might be moving to Moscow afterwards, so there's that… Have a good day.
-Jethro.
Jenny read over it again. Getting married? She had just left him… what was it, six months ago? And he's already getting married!
At least he still thought of her enough to mention her in his letter to Ducky. That's all she wanted.
We never said our love was evergreen,
or as unchanging as the sea—
But if you can still remember,
Stop and think of me
"Special Agent Shepard, the Director would like to see you in his office," Director Yale's secretary, Ingrid, said.
"Be right up," Jenny said, hanging up. She looked at her team. "Don't fool around while I'm gone."
"Sure thing, Ma'am," Probationary Agent Gage Pickett said.
"What have I said about calling me 'ma'am'?" Jenny asked, smiling a sweet smile with a terrifying message behind it.
"To not call you that," Pickett said. "Sorry."
"Thank you, Probie," Jenny said. As she walked past his desk, she said, "It makes me feel old."
She walked swiftly up the stairs to the director's office. Ingrid nodded her head for Jenny to enter.
Director Evan Yale was looking out at the view of the river behind the NCIS headquarters in London. "Agent Shepard," he said, turning around.
"Director," Jenny replied smoothly.
"You are probably the youngest agent to have ever gotten such high praise and reward."
"Thank you, sir."
Yale smiled. "Did you hear about Director Morrow's good news?"
Morrow…. Oh, yeah, that was the director of the NCIS headquarters in D.C. Yeah, he was the director when she was an agent under… under him. "No, sir, I haven't."
"He's been promoted to a job at the Deputy Director position at Homeland Security."
"Good for him!"
"Yes, well, they'll need someone to replace him as the Director of NCIS." Yale gave Jenny a look that she instantly recognized.
"Not me, sir?"
"Why not? You're great with politics, Shepard. You'd be perfect as the director. If you're willing to give up the field, that is."
Jenny smiled. Director? This was all she had been hoping for. The reason why she left Jet— him— in the first place. "Really?"
"Only if you're willing," Yale said. "You don't have to if you don't—"
"I'll take it!"
Think of all the things
we've said and seen—
don't think about the way
things might have been…
Jenny packed for her trip back to the good old US of A. She tried to occupy her thoughts with the friends and family she could see again that she hadn't seen in a while. However, her thoughts kept lingering back to the man she'd have to face again.
Yale had given her a list of all the people working at NCIS in D.C. The first name on the list was, of course, Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs. She would have to face him again.
She kept thinking about how things might have been if she didn't leave him. Would they be married? Would they have kids? Would they be divorced? Or would things not have worked out in the first place and they ended up where they were right now? Would one of them be dead already?
No, she told herself. She had to stop thinking about what might have been. She would never know. What mattered was right now and right here at this time.
Still…
Think of me, think of me waking,
silent and resigned.
Imagine me, trying to hard
To put you from my mind.
Jenny twiddled her fingers nervously as she rode in the car on her way to her new job. She had arrived in D.C. yesterday and was heading in to take over today. She'd already been briefed on their current mission against Ari and the loss of Agent Todd. Jenny also found out that her friend Ziva David would be there as a Mossad liaison. At least there was one familiar face besides… his. Then again, Ducky would be there as well. But he would be there.
She had to stop thinking about him. He… he was just another agent now. Nothing more. There would be no off the job this time. Hopefully.
"Are you alright back there, Ma'am?" the driver, Stan, asked.
"Fine, why?" Jenny asked.
"You're a lot quieter than usual. Something on your mind?"
"No, Stan. I just… I guess you could say I'm a little nervous."
Stan laughed. "Who wouldn't be?"
He wouldn't be. Then again, he'd never be director. Ever. No one would dare even offer him that job position. Not that he would take it. He was meant for the field.
Recall those days, look back on all those times,
think of the things we'll never do
There will never be a day when I won't think of you
Jenny could remember everything from their time together. They were so deep in love at the time. She longed for those times. But he would never forgive her for what she did. He probably didn't even remember her. Just another girl in the "Discard" pile.
They'd never be a normal couple. Married, any of those things. They'd never have the life they both dreamed of. Those times were in the past now.
No matter what, though, she would always think of him and the amazing times they had together, from Marseilles to Paris to Serbia. All of those times great times. All of those times times of love. She braced herself as she heard Morrow talking to him when everyone left MTAC after their successful op.
Can it be?
Can it be Jenny?
Bravo!
Jethro heard the voice in MTAC tell everyone that they did a good job. The voice was so familiar.
It was unforgettable.
But… it couldn't be her. Not Jenny. No, he must have been hearing things. But there was no mistake. His gut told him something was wrong with this picture.
Long ago, it seems so long ago
How young and innocent we were
She may not remember me,
but I remember her
Paris of 1999. Good times. Jethro was instantly overwhelmed by a wave of memories as he saw her face when she stood up and turned to him. He remembered her clearly.
Did she remember him? His question was answered she when she said in an almost suggestive tone, "Jethro," as she addressed him.
Oh how he wished that they could go back to the way they were. They were so deep in love. They belonged together. She was like his second Shannon. She was like the second half to his soul.
She'd never want him, though. She was the one that left. She didn't love him anymore. However, he loved her. He loved her and would do so to the day he died.
Flowers fade
The fruits of summer fate
They have their season
So do we
She would forever love him. No matter what. If only he would feel the same way.
The one thing she did want more than that was that he would think of her. Think of her anyway he wanted to. Whether it be as a partner, a lover, or as an ex-wife, as long as he thought of her, she'd be happy.
But please promise me,
that sometimes
you will think of me!
A/N: Love this song, not as much the fic part. The line "Can it be Jenny?" is actually supposed to be "Can it be Christine?" but I changed it because Jenny fit with… well, Jenny. Obviously. Thanks for the numerous amount of reviews I got! I love you all! *hugs* Suggestions are still welcome. I have quite a few (being about fifty) songs up my sleeve, but I would love more suggestions because I'm sure many of you don't know all these. Please review now!
Oh, sorry if the last little bunch of lyrics is wrong. It was wrong on the thing I got it off and I can't understand what she's saying on my MP3 file.
Song: Think of Me from Phantom of the Opera sung by Christine and Raoul