My back was hurting as I tried to move as I felt a weight on top of me, I did not go into a panic as it was a familiar weight and I could feel Happy breathing on my neck.

Staying here and sleeping on top of a picnic table all night was not part of the plan and now my back was paying for it.

It was still dark outside as tried to reach for my phone to check the time, as I tried several times and all of them were unsuccessful I had to wake up Hap so that we could go home. It was going to be one of those days where we were going to have a lot of things going on.

"Hap." I said as I began to move him as he just tightened his hold around me. "Hap I want to go home." I said as I tried to push him off me as he didn't even budge.

"Just go back to sleep." he mumbled.

"Yeah I would do that if I was in my bed."

"It's the same shit." he said as his phone began to ring. Finally he got off me as he got his phone from his cut as I sat up and wrapped the blanket around me as I picked up my clothes and dusted them off.

As I got dressed Hap sat down as he talked on the phone as my phone began to ring and I noticed it was mom. What in the world was she doing awake at five in the morning?

"Hey" I answered the phone as she started asking questions right away.

"Jess where are you? Are you at the house so that I could pick you up? We have to run some errands before everyone gets here."
"Heading home." I said as I put on my shoes. I was planning on doing my things first and then if she needed something I would help not the other way around.

"Where did you stay? Are you at the clubhouse?"

"Not at the clubhouse."

"Do you want me to pick you up or you're heading over here?"

"Mom I'm going to get ready and then I'm heading over to the clubhouse." I said as I heard her sigh.

"We have a lot of shit to do so hurry up" she said and hung up. This lady thinks my life revolves around her.

"Shit." I said as I picked up my sweater from the floor as Hap buckled his pants as he walked back over to me.

"What?" he asked as he put his arms around me.

"I have to pee." I said as I already knew his suggestion.

"Just go in the bushes."

"There is no way in hell I'm doing that" I said as he just shook his head and walked over to his bike as I made sure we had gotten everything.

"Well then get your ass on the bike." he said as he passed me the helmet. As I got on behind him my phone began to ring again. I knew it was mom so I decided to ignore it as I just put my arms around Hap as he took off.

~A~

I was glad we were finally at the house as I really wanted to at least get another hour of sleep or maybe just thirty minutes before I was forced to leave the comfort of my house.

Hap grabbed the keys as I took off the helmet and followed him to the door as I heard Killer barking as Hap unlocked the door.

"Awe my baby was left all alone." I said to killer as he ran over to me

"I think you love him more than me." said Hap as he closed the door as I let Killer out.

"Only a little" I said as I walked over to the room as I heard Hap mumble bitch under his breath.

"We need to be at the clubhouse in two." he said as he let me go as he closed the back door.

"Well that sounds good, I got enough time to rest take a shower and pack." I said as I knew I was going to hate this lock down as always.

"Jess all you have is thirty minutes." said Hap as I should have known better.

"Right." I walked straight into the restroom and turned on the water, Hap should know by now that I was not going to be ready in thirty minutes maybe in an hour.

As I was about to step into the shower as I stopped mid way as I felt Hap behind me, I leaned back as he kissed my neck.

"Remember you said thirty minutes." I said as I moved away from him and got under the water.

"Don't forget who makes the rules." he said as he bit my shoulder.

"Not you." I said as I turned around facing him as he pressed me against the wall.

As he was about to say something I covered my mouth as I pushed him away almost slipping as I got out of the shower as I kneeled in front of the toilet as I threw up. Way to ruin the mood.

"You alright?" Hap asked as I stood up and walked over to the sink turning on the water. I washed my mouth and splashed water on my face as I felt Hap looking at me.

"Yeah" I said as I turned off the water and got a towel.

"You taking your heart medication." he asked as I wrapped a towel around my body and left the restroom. "Jessica" Hap yelled as he turned off the water as I looked for something to where. "Didn't you hear me?" he asked as he grabbed my arm.

"I'm taking them."

"Are you sure, you better not be lying to me." he said as I tried to get my arm away from his grasp.

"Yeah I'm the one taking them." I said as he let me go. This time I was taking them so it was probably something I had eaten yesterday or something.

My phone began to ring as I was getting dressed as Hap grabbed it and turned it off and left the room. Was that really necessary? I asked out loud as I grabbed my phone and turned it back on as I grabbed one of the bags to start getting my things ready.

Once I finished getting everything ready I put the bags in the living room as I was going to check the doors. Hap didn't say anything as he grabbed the bags as I turned off the lights and locked the doors.

"Killer let's go." called out Hap as I grabbed my purse and made sure everything was off. "You got everything?" Hap asked as I handed him the house keys as I walked over to the car. Now he wanted to talk.

As I got in the car I noticed Killer was already laying down in the backseat as I turned the car on as he climbed over to the passenger seat like always.

"Sorry Killer it's hot and I need the air condition" I told him as he looked out the window as Hap knocked on my window.

"What the fuck is your problem now?" he asked as I just shook my head.

"Nothing" I said as I raised the window as he walked away.

I followed Hap to the clubhouse as I finally got tired of hearing Killer whimper as he stared at the window as I turned off the air and lowered the windows.

~A~

As we reached the clubhouse I saw Tara's car pulling in I had to ask her about something and it was a little urgent, but I knew right now was not the time.

Once I parked I opened the trunk as Half sack grabbed the bags and walked inside as Jax walked over to me.

"You alright?" he asked as he put an arm around me.

"Yeah. Why?"

"Just wondering" he said as he gave me a kiss as we walked inside.

"I have been calling both of you." said mom loud enough that every one in the room turned to look at us.

"No you didn't" we both said as Clay walked out of the Chapel as he walked over to us. I noticed Killer followed Half sack over to the rooms already knowing he was stuck here.

"Alright listen up." called out Jax as Clay began to welcome everyone to the club as we stood next to him. Jax put an arm around me and mom as Clay was finishing up.

Once everyone seemed to get situated it still seemed a bit crowded even with the guys in the Chapel. I walked over to mom as she and Mary were preparing the food.

"Are we not saving Neeta?" I asked mom as she looked over at me as I picked up Abel.

"She is going on vacation."

"Why did she not take me with her" I said as I sat down next to Mary as she was fixing the sandwiches.

"You really think Hap was going to let you go somewhere?" mom asked.

"Who gives a shit what he wants right now. We should have gone to the beach. Right Abel enjoy the sun not be in a room full of people we hate for the moment." I said as mom and Mary glared at me.

"You dream to big." said Mary.

"Damn going to the beach is dreaming big Mary?"

"So what happened that they dragged our asses over here?" she asked as I looked over at mom as Tara came over to the bar.

"It's nothing just a precaution." answered mom.

"So that's the whore Opie is interested in?" asked Mary changing the conversation.

"Really you haven't meet the girl." mom said as I was on Mary's side on this one.

"She's a porn star."

"Hey you were a stripper once" said mom as I smiled at Tara as she laughed.

"Stripper versus porn star. I'm pretty sure Mary wins on this one." I said as mom just shrugged her shoulders.

"You just hate porn stars." she said as that may be one of the many reasons I didn't like Lyla.

"Who doesn't" added Tara.

"That's right Tara come to the dark side we have sandwiches" I said as me and Mary began to laugh as mom hit me.

"She is looking like she needs a little pick me up." said mom as we all looked at her.

"What?" I asked as even Abel turned to see her.

"Tara what are you waiting for?" asked mom as we all looked at her.

"What no." she said as I tried not to laugh.

"Go on." said mom.

"Why doesn't Jess have to go?" she asked.

"I hate the bitch that's never going to change." I said as Mary put an arm around me.

"I'm right with you." said Mary as Tara let out a sigh and walked over to Lyla.

"Here let me get him." mom said as she reached out to grab Abel. Once she had him he began to cry as he reached out his arms for me to get him back.

"Oh he loves me more." I said as she passed him back to me and he stopped crying as mom and Mary looked at each other. "What?" I asked.

"Nothing." answered Mary as mom went over to the kitchen.

"Jess get in here." mom called out as looked over at Mary.

"That doesn't sound so good." I said as I stood up.

"Yeah." she said as I walked over there.

"What's going on?" I asked as I really hoped she didn't say we needed to talk.

"Got to go run some errands mind going." I should really say no, because it's never a good thing that she asked me.

"I won't mind." I said as she nodded and looked over at me.

"Alright let me tell Tara were going." she said as she left.

"Why do I feel like you are up to something?" asked Hap as he walked into the kitchen.

"I'm not at this moment." I said as mom walked back in.

"Ready to go?" she asked as Hap looked at her and then back at me.

"Your not going Jess." he said.

"What?" I asked confused as he left the kitchen as I looked over at mom as Mary walked in.

"I think that means that he is putting you on his lock down." said Mary as I left the kitchen as I looked for Hap as Tara grabbed Abel.

As I didn't see him at the bar so I headed over to the room. When I walked in he was changing his shirt as I sat down on the bed.

"You heard me Jess, there is no reason for you to even step out of those gates." he said as I stood up as I was not agreeing with him at all.

"Hap I'm probably just going to the store and return." I said as I didn't see the reason why he was against it.

"When you're with your mother you always end up doing shit that you're not supposed to." he said as he may have a point there but where did he find this need to demand shit from me.

"We are just going to the store." I said as he was walking over to the door as he stopped and turned around.

"No you will do as I say." he said and left slamming the door behind him. You have got to be kidding me. I left the room and headed back to the bar as mom and Tara were waiting.

"So?" mom asked as I just shook my head no and sat down.

"Mind taking care of him?" asked Tara. "I still have to go to the hospital and finish some paperwork.

"Yeah I will stay with Abel" I said as Tara put the diaper bag on the table as they walked away.

"What's going on you're looking a little pissed?" asked Mary.

"No apparently I was told to stay put."

"Sometimes it sucks being an Old Lady huh." she said as the guys left the chapel. I noticed Tig and Kozik seemed to be having a discussion.

"Yeah sometimes." I said as Clay walked over to me while Tig and Hap left the clubhouse.

"Where's your mother?" asked Clay.

"Just left to run some errands."

"Alright we're going to handle some things." he said as he walked away. I grabbed Abel's things and headed over to the room, I was already getting a headache from all of them talking at the same time.

I laid Abel down on the middle of the bed as I heard someone knocking. As I opened it I noticed it was Ellie as she just smiled at me.

"Can I be in here, it's to crowded over there." she said as I moved so that she could walk in. IT had been awhile since I had spend some time with her.

"Where's midnight?" she asked as she petted Killer and sat down on the bed.

"Well since he already lives outside, I doubt he would of come." I said as I laid back down on the bed as she did the same. "So how are you?" I asked as she kicked off her shoes.

"I miss her." she said as she stared at the ceiling.

"Yeah me too." I said as she looked over at me.

"Do you think it ever stops hurting?"

"With time it does, but it doesn't mean you wont miss her." I said as she nodded. I grabbed one of the pillows and handed it over to her hoping we could catch some sleep with Abel.

~A~

We had been asleep for thirty minutes as we both awoke to Abel crying as I sat up and reached over to get Abel's bag I noticed Ellie had gotten her shoes.

"Where are you going?" I asked as I made Abel's bottle.

"I'm going to go see what Kenny is doing." she said as she put her shoes on. "Bye Aunt Jess" she said as she left the room.

"Well you do know how to clear a room." I said to Abel as I picked him up as Hap walked in taking off his cut and laid down on the bed.

"Everything alright?" I asked as I turned my attention to him as he was looking over at me.

"We got our shipment back." announced Hap as he closed his eyes as I leaned back on the headboard. "I don't want you out there, with all of us busy it's not safe." he said as he sat up.

"It would have been better if you would asked not just demanded."

"Why didn't you tell me about it when it happened? It was your responsibility to tell me, I would of taken care of it that day without having to wait on anyone to tell me when I could."

"Really Hap and where would you be right now? You would of reacted without thinking."

"Is that your answer or was that what your mother thought what was best."

"I made the decision not my mother." I said as he stood up as I began to burp Abel.

"You know what I think?" he asked as he walked over to me. "You didn't trust me. That's what I think when I try to wrap my mind over this shit."

"I was afraid of losing you." I said as I looked up at him as he just began to pace.

"Don't fucking give me that bullshit Jess."

"It wasn't the first time and I might not feel it everyday but what gets to me is the fact that there is some other bitch out there willing to take my place one who probably has no fucking problems and is just what you need. Do you ever have that feeling Hap, that I will leave you for someone else? No right because I don't let it happen." I said as I got up and left the room.

(Thanks for reading and reviewing)