Not having internet is a drag.

Moving on...

Again, I apologize for the shortness and excess of chapters.

Let's do this, ja?

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"Change of plans"

Roxas spent the next few hours staring at the walls of his classrooms as the teachers' voices drifted into his head only to be lost amid the storm of thoughts of self-loathing that had taken up residence since the afternoon. He rubbed the spot below his ear almost to the point of being raw as he poured over the conversation with Axel. Was there really anything he could say now that would make him seem like any less of a monster?

And Axel had actually said he loved Roxas. The words had sent Roxas reeling but at the same time, he wished he could hear them over and over. And at least in better context. Had Axel really meant that Roxas disappointed him? The thought was almost unbearable. And was it over now? It couldn't be!

As soon as the bell rang for the end of his final class, Roxas threw his papers and books into his backpack and set off across the campus in a run to Axel's dorm. He crashed through the door, ignoring Laxaeus's puzzled stare from one of the large chairs, and darted up the steps to the bedroom. His eyes tore the room apart, but he found only empty beds. He walked forward slowly, taking a seat on Axel's unmade and messy bed. He was determined to wait right there until Axel returned.

"Hey Roxas." Xigbar's voice sounded from behind him though it sounded drained.

"Xigbar?" Roxas looked over his shoulder to find Axel's roommate leaning against the doorframe. "Hey. Have you seen..." he began.

"Axel's staying with Xemnas in his dorm tonight. I don't know what you did, but you set him off real good. I don't suggest going over there, either." Xigbar warned, his eyes narrowing.

"He isn't mad at me, is he?" Roxas choked, tears prickling the back of his eyes.

"No. He's really upset, though." Xigbar blamed Roxas. "The hell did you say to him?" he demanded. Roxas swallowed hard and looked down at his hands.

"I told him I wanted him to stop cutting." he whimpered. Xigbar's arms fell from where they were crossed over his chest and a hand flew over his eyes as he groaned.

"You're serious, aren't you?" he asked.

"Yes, I am. I wasn't going to just stand back and watch Axel keep doing something like that and if you think that I'm wrong for saying anything, then..." Roxas became defensive.

"I'm not mad at you." Xigbar assured him. "I'm mad at Axel."

"You're not the only one." Roxas murmured.

"So he's back at it again. Damn him anyway!" Xigbar grunted, taking a seat beside Roxas. "No wonder Vex and Laxaeus have been so miffed lately."

"And you didn't think to ask?" Roxas wondered.

"Naw. Vexen can be pretty moody and Lax doesn't say much to start with. I didn't think Axel was back to slice & dicin'. That really sucks." Xigbar sighed. "Never seen him get this upset over someone confronting him about it, though." he added.

"Gee thanks." Roxas snarled sarcastically.

"No I mean... usually he gets all pissed off and throws a temper tantrum then goes into his cocky 'I can do whatever I want, it's my body' speech. He must really like you." Xigbar mused. "He loves me..." Roxas thought sadly.

"Yeah..." he sighed. "So there's... no reasoning with him?"

"Not a chance." Xigbar shook his head. "He's barricaded himself in Xem's dorm."

"You can't talk to him for me?" Roxas pleaded, only to get a shake of the head from Xigbar.

"It's better to just leave him alone right now." he soothed. "Trust me on this."

"Can...can I at least spend the night here?" Roxas asked, feeling himself flush.

"I guess. But...why?" Xigbar asked. Roxas blushed harder and looked at the comforter under his fingers.

"Because his bed smells like him." he whispered. Xigbar bit his lower lip and gripped Roxas's shoulders gently.

"You really like him, don't you?" he mumbled. Roxas nodded, a small tear rolling down his cheek.

"I love him." he admitted. Xigbar said nothing else, he just wrapped Roxas in a tight hug that Roxas returned.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

"Please don't do that." Xemnas cringed, watching Axel bury his face in Xemnas's favorite satin pillow, leaving a trail of mucus and tears in his wake.

"Screw you!" came Axel's muffled, anguished cry. Xemnas sighed and shook his head, turning on his stereo. The disk tray slid out and he placed a burned CD into one of the ten slots and pushed another button, watching the tray disappear back into the enormous wall of plastic, circuits and wiring. There was some muted gear grinding as the tiny laser inside bounced off the encoded surface of the disk. The first few notes of a song from Xemnas's tween years filled the room making Axel groan and lift his head up out of the pillow.

"Are you kidding me?" he sobbed. " 'Bittersweet Symphony'? You really think I need to listen to something so damn depressing right now?"

"I happen to love The Verve. It's not my fault you're a wreck." Xemnas snapped. "And it's not depressing." he added.

"You're right." Axel sighed, propping himself up on his elbows.

"The song isn't depressing?"

"No." Axel glared. "It is. But you're right about it not being your fault... it's mine. Just like Roxas said." he sighed.

"What exactly did he say?" Xemnas asked, taking a seat on the edge of his bed after grabbing a magazine off of Demyx's night table. Axel gave Xemnas a rundown of the earlier conversation, not excluding the part where Axel admitted to loving Roxas.

"Holy shit balls." Xemnas muttered with wide eyes. "You dropped the 'L' bomb?" he cringed.

"I wasn't exactly thinking straight." Axel defended. Xemnas let out a low whistle and chuckled humorlessly.

"You're on your own with that one." he said, thumbing through the magazine.

"What do you mean?" Axel mumbled, not looking up from his feet.

"I mean the 'love' thing. You're on your own." said Xemnas.

"You can't help me? Why? Because you've never really loved someone?" Axel mused.

"Hey check it out! Gibson's releasing a new limited edition double-neck. It's supposed to look just like Jimmy Paige's, too." Xemnas said, ignoring Axel's comment as he looked through Demyx's 'Musicians Monthly'.

"Oh my god. I've done it!" Axel cried, sitting up.

"Done what?" Xemnas grumbled.

"I've discovered the carefully guarded secret of the super-suave Xemnas." Axel said confidently.

"Oh, and what's that?" Xemnas glared.

"You're a sociopath." Axel nodded.

"Listen here, youngster." Xemnas began, pointing the magazine at Axel. "I might not be from a broken home like some kids..." he looked harder at Axel. "But I'm sure as hell not from a loving one. I try not to attach myself to people unless I feel it's genuinely worth my time. That doesn't make me a sociopath. It makes me guarded. There's a slight, but oh-so-significant difference." he declared, setting the magazine back in his lap and opening up to the article about metronomes. Axel wrinkled his nose, more offended by the 'youngster' comment than the one about his family.

"Could have fooled me." he said after a moment. Xemnas glared at him with a side-glance.

"What do you mean by that?" he asked smoothly, though there was obviously poison bubbling beneath the surface.

"I see the way you look at Roxas." Axel snapped. "And in case you're wondering, it does bother me."

"You're a real piece of work, Axel." Xemnas said with disregard. "Remind me again...why am I letting you stay here tonight?"

"You can't tell me it's just that you think he's cute." Axel ignored him. At this, Xemnas tossed the magazine to the side and jumped on Axel, pinning him by his upper arms to the bed.

"You've known me for years, Axel. Years!" he growled in the boy's face. "You really think I'd try to take from you the only thing that makes you happy?!"

"I don't." Axel admitted, trying to free himself from Xemnas's grasp, but to no avail. "But then again, I thought you were straight for a while there." he added menacingly.

"You know I consider myself above labeling anything, especially my sexuality." Xemnas narrowed his eyes. "If I find someone attractive, I find them attractive."

"Boys just happen to tickle your fancy more than anything with a set of tits." Axel accused. Xemnas tightened his grip on Axel's thin arms.

"Girls are bitches, and yes, boys tend to catch my eye a bit more..." he grinned seductively and shifted his weight against Axel, making him gasp sharply. "Some more than others." he whispered.

"Get off me!" Axel groaned, wriggling in Xemnas's grasp. The older boy complied, letting go of Axel, watching him slip off the bed and move to stand by the window, looking out of it with frustration wrinkling his pale forehead.

"I know you're not in the best head space right now..." Xemnas began. "But it hurts me to know that you think I'd take Roxas from you. Even if he was anything more than a tight ass to stare at." he muttered.

"I don't think anyone would have to try very hard to take him at this point." Axel rasped sadly.

"Oh get over yourself." Xemnas groaned. "The kid loves you. If you can't see that, you're dumber than you look, alright? You guys just need a break from each other."

"That's why I'm not going to Demyx's house for the holidays." Axel mumbled, folding his arms across his chest, still staring out the window.

"Well that's stupid." Xemnas said, leaning back against the pillow Axel hadn't defiled.

"You said it yourself, we need a break. Besides, I want him to have fun and he really can't do that if I'm there. Not after what happened today." Axel sighed.

"Whatever." Xemnas said, stretching out. There was a moment of silence as Axel thought.

"I want you to go instead." he finally said. At this, Xemnas sat up and stared at him.

"You wanna run that by me again?" he asked, his eyebrows quirked.

"I said I want you to go instead." Axel repeated. "You said you didn't have the munny, right?"

"Well yeah but... you sure?" Xemnas questioned, a hint of suspicion in his tone.

"Positive. Think about it...moonlit beaches, satin sheets, eggnog, music..." Axel murmured.

"And Roxas." Xemnas's eyes narrowed as he understood what Axel was getting at.

"And Roxas." Axel nodded.

"You're sick." Xemnas growled. Axel only shrugged and pulled his wallet out of his back pocket, retrieving the train ticket. He strode to the side of Xemnas's bed and waved it in front of his face.

"Consider it a test." he whispered, pressing the piece of paper to Xemnas's bare chest. Axel was halfway to the door when Xemnas called after him.

"You're sleeping on the floor, I hope you know!" he shouted.

"I'm going to sleep in my dorm tonight." Axel said over his shoulder. "Change of plans."

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Rawr!

(By the way, "Bittersweet Symphony" by The Verve is the most amazing song in the universe. And I know I throw in a lot of songs names and bands, but I'm trying to kinda build the characters' personalities by showing what kind of music they listen to. Hope it's helping.)

Reviews?