The Revelations of an Innocent Mind
CHAPTER 21: PREVENTING BLOOD STAINS
Something doesn't feel right.
It has almost been an hour now, and here I am, waiting – albeit impatiently – for Edward to show up for our date.
Why isn't he here?
Then I remembered Jasper and his blatant anger about the death of his father, Morgan Whitlock. I forgot to ask Alice about him because of all the things that happened afterward.
Suddenly, an alarming thought occurred to me: What if Edward is with Jasper?
No.
No.
No.
In an abrupt move, I took out my phone to dial Alice's digits, thanking my lucky stars that I asked for her number.
I heard the usual ringing from the other line as I agitatedly kept muttering, "Pick up, pick up, pick up …"
After what felt like hours, Alice finally answered on the other line sounding way too cheerful for my present mood.
"Hi Bella. How is the date so far? Where did Edward take you …?"
"Alice," I cut her words, "Edward's still not here. I've been waiting for an hour. I hope I'm just overreacting, but I have a feeling he's with Jasper – why else would he be missing?"
"What?"
"Where do you think Jasper would take him? You're good at tracking, Alice. Where do you think they could be?"
"Bella, calm down. Maybe he's just late …"
"Has he ever been late before?"
Alice took a moment to answer this time.
"No. You're right, he's never been late. I can see your point. It's your first date, and Emmett told us a little about how much he prepared for it. Give me a minute to figure this all out."
"Alice, make it quick please," I demanded, before touching the end button on my phone.
I started tapping my foot on the floor while biting my nails as I waited for Alice to call me back. My gaze flickered to my death-trap heels, and I took off my shoes.
It took Alice a minute to call me again. When I picked it up, I could hear a familiar noise in the background.
"Bella, Rose and I are in the car right now. Have you tried calling Edward? He's not picking up our calls."
I hit my temple with my palm – why hadn't I thought of that before?
Stupid.
Stupid.
"I didn't," I muttered-groaned on the phone, "I'm sorry, I forgot. You were the first person that came into my mind to call."
"We're close to the restaurant now – I told Emmett to stay at the entrance to keep an eye on you outside for possible intruders. Edward is near the Alkire Park. We'll get you safe first before we go in there."
What?
"No! I'm coming Alice. You can't keep me out of this, are you crazy? And how did you know so easily where Edward was?"
"I put a tracker to all of our phones – I put one in yours earlier when Rose was doing your hair."
"A-what? Tracker? Alice, it would have been convenient to tell me about that before, don't you think?"
"Edward knows. Sorry, I forgot to tell you."
"I'm going crazy here thinking how to find Edward and you just, what, put a tracker to find him?"
"Bella, let's stop arguing about this, please. We have more important things on our hands. We're around the block. I'm hanging up."
She's right. We have more important things to discuss. But the tracker thing just threw me off.
"Miss, is there something wrong?" I turned to the waiter who was looking at me with concern. Then I noticed that all the other servers were also looking at me strangely.
"I'm all right. It seems as though my date couldn't make it. I appreciate everything that has been done, but I'm afraid we won't be eating here tonight."
I didn't even give him time to say anything before I began walking out of the room with my pouch and shoes in my hand.
I came face to face with Alice, Rose and Emmett at the door.
"I'm coming," I told Alice without preamble, and she looked at me cursorily before deciding not to argue.
"We'll use Rose's car – the limousine isn't cut out for this."
Without more words, we all hopped into Rose's car. Rosalie drove manically as I clutched the car's side.
"There, there, Rose, turn left," Alice directed without looking away from the laptop in front of her. I hadn't even noticed she had one with her.
"Alice, who is this Morgan Whitlock?"
She answered me while still absorbed by whatever she was looking at her laptop.
"Morgan's one of the mafia leaders. He rules the South, here in Arizona. Edward killed him a few months ago, effectively stopping all his businesses. Jasper wasn't skilled enough to take over everything his father left behind, and not too soon after, Whitlock's went bankrupt, leaving Jasper penniless."
I shuddered – for the first time feeling fear instead of anxiety.
"Why did Edward kill him?"
Alice shifted her eyes to me for a fraction of a second, before looking back at her laptop.
"That's a story you have to ask Edward yourself. I'm sorry, I can't tell."
Then I realized something …
"Wait, Rose, where did you get this car? I thought you got here on a plane."
"I suppose you aren't opposed to grand theft auto."
"Wait, what?"
She huffed, though not a swerve was made from her manic driving.
"I'll give it back, okay? Think of it as a borrowed car. One of the customers of the hotel owns this."
Emmett bumps my shoulder slightly as he kindly says, "Give it a rest, B. We have more important things to do. Rose, Alice and I already quit with Aro. You worry too much."
"Sorry Em," I mumbled. "I'm just freaking out a little."
"Don't worry about Edward. He's tough. Jasper is nothing compared to him."
Then he shot me his dimpled smile, making me a little calmer.
"Alice," Rose called out, catching Alice's attention, "We're at Alkire Park."
"I know. Turn right, and you'll see an abandoned house. That's where he is."
In my periphery, I saw Emmett loading his gun – I'd never even seen him with one before.
"Why do fuckers always choose the abandoned houses?" Emmett muttered rhetorically, but Alice still answered.
"You know why Em. There are CCTVs everywhere now. Killing people in public places isn't really a smart move – not unless you're as good as Edward."
I remembered the public murder in New York at the auction.
Another chill ran down my spine.
"Stop here," Alice directed again to Rose, who abruptly stopped the car near the aforementioned abandoned house.
We all hopped out as fast as we could – Alice and Rose adjusting their guns – before we entered the house.
The abandoned house was run-down, dark, and eerie. There were cracks everywhere in the walls, decorated with cobwebs.
Emmett silently handed me something, and in the dim light, I recognized it as a gun.
I don't know how to fire one, but it at least is some sort of protection. I guess it's better than being helplessly defenseless.
Alice signaled for us to quiet down as we crept silently forward.
Not too far from us, we could hear noises – two people mutedly talking – from the other side of the room.
One of them is starkly familiar. It was Edward's voice, and I'd know it anywhere.
The other one is a voice I'm starting to get familiar with. I was right – Jasper had Edward.
We stood directly behind the door.
"How many?" Rose whispered through her breath.
"Only he and Jasper," Alice answered just as quietly. "Bella," she then turned to me, "Please, you shouldn't be here. Things could get ugly and you could be in our way."
That felt like a slap towards me though she didn't intend for it to be that way. But, she was right, of course. I shouldn't have come. I am a liability to all of them.
"But it's too late now," she continued, as I tried to ignore the sudden helplessness and self-pity that I was feeling. "I can't leave you with Rose alone. We don't know if he has back-up. It's better if you're with us than somewhere alone and unprotected."
So that was the reason why she let me tail them – I would be unprotected.
I really need to learn how to kick people's asses.
When I took a step to my right, I felt something stabbed my barefooted-toe, but I didn't care. My toes could bleed all they want.
However, my sudden movement made me lose my footing, making me collide into the door. The commotion alerted Edward and Jasper and their muted talking suddenly stopped short.
I held my breath.
Seconds later, we all heard Jasper shout, "Who's there?!"
I winced at my stupidity, and Alice, Rosalie and Emmett, all heaved a collected sigh.
Because we're all obviously busted, Alice decided to lower her gun to come into view. She opened the door, and we all followed her into the dimly lit room.
As soon as we entered, my eyes fell on the scene before me.
Beside me, Alice greeted, "Hello Jasper Whitlock," in a sweet, confident tone, as though she and Jasper were long-time friends.
I took that opportunity to observe the two men in the room:
Both Jasper and Edward were standing as Jasper pointed his gun at Edward. Making a brief inventory of Edward, I could see him unscathed, and there were no visible bruises in him. His gun was in his right hand, but it was lowered and he seemed calm.
It wasn't something I expected – on our ride to this place, I kept picturing Edward looking worse.
In contrary to the calm demeanor that Edward exudes, for some reason, Jasper looked fragile and crazed. Even though he was the one who looked to be in control – since he was the one whose gun was pointing at Edward – he looked everything but.
He wasn't standing straight; his gait was a little bent and he was shaking like a leaf.
"Don't come closer or else I'll fire this gun!" Jasper shouted at us.
"Alice," Edward then called out, still looking calm. "Why did you bring Bella here?"
"We couldn't just leave her alone, Edward. She can't protect herself. Even if I send Rose or Em with her, it still wouldn't be enough to protect her in case this fool might have back-up with him." She gestured to Jasper, obviously deeming him as the 'fool'.
Edward sighed but didn't comment anymore.
Rosalie chose that moment to finally speak.
"Are you really that big of an idiot, Jasper Whitlock? Did you really think you could take Edward by yourself? The only reason he's in here in the first place is because he wanted to talk to you. Yes, he killed your father, but he had damn good reasons why. Put that gun down and let's talk – you don't need all these antics."
"Shut up!" Jasper shouted, and in a sudden move, he fired his gun through the roof.
Things felt a little bit more frantic then.
Feeling the seriousness of the situation, Edward finally spoke in a guarded tone and began by asking, "Have you ever killed anyone before? Because it seems like you haven't – your hands are shaking uncontrollably."
"Shut up, Cullen, or I'll really shut you up with this!" Jasper screamed, pointing his gun back at Edward.
However, Edward did something that shocked all three of us. He suddenly threw his gun in front of Jasper as he raised his hands – palms up – as though he was claiming defeat.
He continued to speak even after Jasper's warning, and this time, he was even calmer and more guarded as though he was conveying something crucial.
"It is your right to kill me, Jasper Whitlock – an eye for an eye, it is. I threw my weapon, but know that once your hands are dirtied, the blood would never come off no matter how much you try to wash it down the drain."
His words seemed to affect Jasper; the shaking man looked to be on the brink of tears.
"Are you trying to justify killing my father? You have no idea what I went through after that, Cullen," Jasper spat. "Yes, I'm shaking, but I'm shaking because I want to kill you so badly."
"Then why aren't you firing?"
Jasper shook a little more; my heart drummed.
What if he does fire?
Looking at Jasper straight in the eyes, Edward's next words were delivered with such emotion, such experience, that a tremor wracked my whole body.
"My hands would always shake after I took away lives – and I've already done it fifteen times. A piece of advice from a professional killer to a would-be killer: look me in the eyes when you pull the trigger. Be man enough to do that. If you can do it – truly see my eyes as the life in them leaves me – the shaking might be worse next time. It's a good shaking because it will make you remember that you're a human and not merely a killing machine and that there is still a conscience lingering in your head after you've done it."
"Stop talking!"
Jasper seemed more desperate as he continued to crumble before our eyes. However, Edward didn't stop speaking – he knew he was getting to him.
"I can never forget the first time that I killed, I couldn't sleep for three straight days. I still can't find a peaceful sleep at night. I don't think you want to feel that."
I knew what Edward was doing; I glanced briefly at my companions and we all seemed to have the same thoughts. He was trying to coax Jasper not to fire the bullet at his own will, to prevent Jasper from turning into a murderer. I knew then that Edward felt he owes Jasper, his father's life, and that's the reason why he deliberately chose to come here.
He could have easily avoided this confrontation – from the way Alice and the rest talks about Edward, I knew that he was very skilled, and Jasper couldn't take him on singlehandedly. But he wanted to meet him, because he felt accountable for what he did in the past.
But what if Jasper actually did fire, could I afford to see that?
For a second – a fleeting moment – I thought about Edward firing a shot at him instead, as I questioned why I even made him swear the stupid promise about not killing anyone.
However, I already asked Edward to stop killing people. And he already threw his gun away from him, leaving him with no weapon.
Then, a sudden, alarming thought occurred to me:
I have my gun with me – I could creep behind Jasper and fire at him.
But what if I hurt Edward instead? What if I will make the situation worse?
What if I killed Jasper?
What if I killed Edward?
I looked down at the gun in my hand, contemplating …
"There's only two ways this could end," Edward still continued as I looked up to see how Jasper's fury made him tear up. "Neither one of the choices seeming to favor you, but at least one of them will get you out of here alive.
The first, which I suggest you not to follow through with because it will be dumb luck on your part to do so, is to kill me. Of course, you can't just kill me without expecting retaliation from Emmett, Rose or Alice. So you have to kill everyone here, even Bella." He made a fleeting look at me, before turning his eyes back to Jasper. I noticed his voice broke a little when he said my name.
"If you leave one alive," he continued, "they'll tell the cops. If you try to kill us all, I can assure you, you will not win – there are five of us here and only one of you. So you get what you came here for – to kill me – but at what cost? Your life? For your asshole of a father who fucked with another woman while your mother was dying in her bed?"
At this, Jasper visibly shuddered as his face contorted.
"The second and more sensible choice is to put your gun down. Of course, you'd argue I just want to save my own skin – and I can pretty much assure you, I damn well want to. But here's the thing; you won't get your hands dirty, you won't deal with the cops – or the FBI that have been after me for too long – and you won't deal with Aro.
Edward took a cautious step forward.
"It is revenge you seek and I know quite well how that feels. It was the same reason I took out your father in the first place."
At this, Jasper whimpered. His sudden move made him stagger forward to point the gun directly at Edward's face.
I gasped in fear.
He was only a few inches from Edward now; Edward could have easily unarmed him if he actually wanted to. But still, Edward chose to continue speaking; sounding unaffected that a gun is now mere inches from his head.
"Jasper, I killed your father because he killed my family. You know he wasn't a saint. He never even treated you like his successor or his son. He disregarded you – you're only after me because he left you with nothing.
If you kill me because I killed him, then these guys will kill you because you killed me. When is the cycle ever gonna end?
Let me help you."
Jasper laughed humorlessly as he sneered, "How can you help me?" Tears were now streaming down his face.
What he said was obviously rhetorical, it was more of a snide comment than an actual question. However, Edward still chose to answer him.
"I will help you by giving you a better life, with a much better direction. I'll give more than half of my money to you – I'm sure my wealth is no secret to the underworld. You can start a clean, new life, free from all these demons. And it's the only way I can make up to you for killing your father, no matter how much I hated him or the fact that he killed my family.
Jasper made another whimpering sound. He kicked the closest thing in his path – which was a chair – before he pointed his gun back at Edward's head.
Then he spoke in a helpless way, "How can I make sure you'll do what you say, huh? You fucking killed my father, and I am miserable because of you. How can I fucking believe you?"
Edward looked at him, straight into his eyes.
"You're the one pointing the gun at my skull, Jasper, not the other way around. I guess you just have to trust me – the same way that I am entrusting you with my life."
At the obvious display of indecisiveness from Jasper, Alice chose that moment to intervene, speaking in a soothing way.
"If you kill him, Jasper, you will take away a very special person in that woman's life." She quickly pointed at me. "You know what it feels like to lose someone important to you. Are you willing to deny her of her love, the same way you were condemned when your mother left you? You didn't have much choice back then, but with Bella, all of her agony will be placed in your hands if you kill the only man that she ever loved.
I don't want you to be a murderer, Jasper. I will help you."
Jasper looked at Alice's direction to ask in an accusing way, "What do you know about love, eh? What makes you think I could believe anything that you've said?"
However, Alice merely smiled, as she hugged herself protectively across her torso.
"I'm not really sure. My mother is a prostitute; when I was fifteen, she tried to force me to be the same. I almost became one but Edward showed up to save me from the men who were forcing themselves on me. I don't love Edward the way Bella does, but I love him enough to think that he is my savior. And if you kill my savior, you will also kill me."
I never knew the magnitude of gratitude that Alice felt for Edward. I heard her story before, but she didn't tell me about Edward saving her the first time they met. I just naturally assumed that because the nature of their 'work' is the same, they just became close without effort. This revelation made me see their relationship in an entirely new light.
With that said, Jasper was finally able to break down, sobbing uncontrollably. He tumbled down to the cement floor, supporting his weight with his hands, and with his gun safely out of the distance from Edward.
Alice ran to his side, hushing him tenderly.
That was all I saw of Alice and Jasper before Edward was at my side and tossing the gun I was holding to the floor. Giving me no time to absorb anything, he precipitously hugged me so tightly I almost felt as if I'm being crushed.
He didn't give me time to recover, however, because suddenly his lips were on mine. At my unexpected gasp, he took that opportunity to put his tongue in my mouth.
I closed my eyes and took time to accommodate this frantic kissing. He seemed unconcerned about anything else or about all the people in the room, and was only focused on kissing me.
When he finally broke the kiss, we both found ourselves having a hard time breathing.
"Are you unhurt?" I asked frantically, inspecting him closer to see if he received any blows from Jasper before we got to him.
"No. Why are you here, Bella … You could have been hurt. God, I can't believe Alice brought you here."
And that's when I erupted.
"And what? Eat my supper alone as I waited for you to be killed by Jasper? Adorn my apartment with all the flowers you sent me as I wonder whether or not I'll see you alive again? I don't think so, Cullen. And how about you, huh? You didn't show up for our date and you made me so worried thinking that something happened to you. What if we didn't get here and Jasper really pulled the trigger? God, Edward, don't scare me like that ever again."
Tears welled up in my eyes as all my frustrations finally found a way to be released.
"Shh," he hushed me, wiping my tears. "Everything is over. It's all right. I'm fine, I'm here," he chanted as he hugged me again to him.
But I couldn't stop tearing up and I knew I was close to breaking down.
Suddenly, I found myself consumed with an abundance of anger and frustration and the next thing I knew, I was giving him futile punches to his chest.
"I thought we were too late, you stupid man! I thought you died! I thought I lost you forever!"
Edward didn't move even after I hit him repeatedly with weak punches. When they slowed down, he took both my hands to encircle them around his waist, as he hugged me again and dropped a kiss on my temple.
I was still sobbing, however, and when I attacked him next, it wasn't with my hands – it was with my kisses.
I kissed every inch of him that my lips could touch: his lips, his cheeks, his temple, the edge of his right eye; his shoulders, his chest, his arms, his hands, his palms …
I kissed him as I continued to sob.
I kissed him as if my life depended on it.
"Shh. I'm all right, I'm here. I'm sorry. Shh, my Bella," he crooned.
Then someone said:
"All right guys, I appreciate that this is a dramatic moment, but I really want to go home now."
Looking up, I saw Rosalie rolling her eyes at us. Her anti-climactic remark made us stop with what we were doing.
With that, Edward tucked me to his side, placing his arm around me. When he looked down at me, his face appeared as though he remembered something.
"The date," he mumbled as he skimmed my appearance for the first time.
I must have looked a sight. Clad in my red dress, barefooted, toes bleeding, my shoes and purse in my left hand... Good thing I wasn't holding the gun that Emmett had given me earlier.
"I'm sorry about ruining our date," said Edward as he scans my appearance, running his index finger over his lower lip. "You look gorgeous, and I feel really sorry that I missed it."
He then skimmed his hand over my immediate blush and tucked the stray hair from my face behind my ear. After that, he placed his index finger on his lips as his eyes skimmed my legs, lingering there far longer than was necessary.
Self-consciously, I tried to straighten my dress.
"Alice and Rose did all the make-up and styling, and they lent me the dress."
He looked around us to spot Rose, who was at Emmett's side in the same position as us, and to Alice, who was helping the still quivering Jasper to stand.
"Thank you, Rose, Alice. Bella looks beautiful."
Although Rosalie seemed a bit peeved that we weren't moving as fast as she wanted out of the abandoned building, she managed to shoot Edward a happy smirk.
Alice, who was now walking with Jasper out of the room – her arms around his torso as Jasper's left arm was on her shoulder – then answered, "She's naturally beautiful so it was easy making her more beautiful. She really didn't need a lot of make-up." I blushed again, unused to being complimented.
"This fool," she continued, motioning to Jasper, "really had shitty timing orchestrating this attempted murder."
To say that I was surprised at how easily they seem to be at ease with Jasper after the whole ordeal was a huge understatement. But then again, I shouldn't have expected them to be hysterical the way was about Edward. I decided then to put all of this behind me, the way they do.
With that said, Edward and I started walking out of the room. However, when I took a step with my right foot, I felt a sting on my injured toe, which made me wince in pain.
Noticing my reaction, Edward murmured, "Your toe is bleeding."
I wanted to point out that he was saying something that was obvious, but the look of concern on his face made me swallow my snarky comment. Instead, I tried to appease him by saying, "It's not a big deal."
Edward sighed, and in one swift move, he carried me bridal style, making me gasp in surprise.
"This is entirely unnecessary, please put me down. I can walk," I tried to protest. However, Edward just rolled his eyes, as though I was the one being petty instead of him, and just carried me out of the room.
But, to be honest, being carried this way has its perks. Aside from the fact that I felt like a cry-baby, six-year-old whose toe has an 'owwie', being as close as this with Edward, smelling his heavenly scent, and up-close with his face, is almost worth the injury.
I kissed his jaw.
That made him smile.
"It was really a shame we missed our first date," I mused, as I took hold of the collar of his tux. I can now observe that he was wearing one, and feeling regret that I didn't get to enjoy ogling him on our supposed date. "Booking the restaurant seemed expensive, and now all those flowers will go to waste. And, you really look good in this tux."
"Thanks," he smiled crookedly, "But there is still a next time. I'll make sure I make it up to you on our next date."
I shook my head in disagreement.
"No, I don't want you to spend money that way anymore. I really appreciated what you did, and I will make sure I get my flowers back, along with your card from where I left it, but next time, I just want us to spend the day in my apartment – or yours, once we get back to New York. We could watch movies with homemade popcorn, and then I'll cook dinner. Just that simple. That will make me really happy."
"It's a date then."
I smiled.
After almost losing him today, I realized that nothing else matters as long as we are together. Even if we live together in his grand mansion or camp out in my rotten apartment, the important thing is that he is with me and I'm in his arms, like this.
"One of the many," I whispered.
As Edward smiled, I knew then that what I said was the absolute truth.