Full disclosure—I used to work for MTV/VH1 in the late 90's/early 00's. Kind of a slave labor camp of hot-looking and weird 20 somethings who got paid barely enough to live above the poverty level, but the perks were awesome! It would have been really cool to work there in the early 80's though, right?
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Sorry—no sMut in this chapter, but I promise I'll write some into the next one. I know how much you all love your sexytimes. This chapter is kind of a transition chapter, setting you up for the next phase of the story.
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HAPPY LABOR DAY!
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CHAPTER 21
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Donna sits in a salon chair admiring her reflection in a large mirror. Fez approaches her from behind and starts examining her hair.
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"Your hair is flat" he declares in a disgust-laden voice.
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Donna is wide-eyed. "I'm guessing flat is...bad?"
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"It's not the 70's anymore Big Red, natural is out and glamour is in!" he says with a hand gesture that hints at this being a rehearsed speech he's given millions of times before. "Do you want to be out or in?" he challenges her.
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She looks at him for the answer then tentatively guesses. "...in?"
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"You bet your sweet sweet ass you do" he tells her, while circling her chair in a predatory manner.
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"So what do you suggest I have done?" she asks.
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"I want carte blanche" he demands calmly.
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The redhead looks mildly alarmed. "But Fez-"
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"I said carte blanche!" he snaps as he walks to the back to get his supplies.
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Donna knows she should probably be more nervous than she is, but she's ready for a change. Every time she looks in the mirror she sees the same girl in all of her old pictures with Eric, and she's sick of looking like that girl. It only reminds her of what she once had.
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However, she went blonde for a year and it turned out to be the worst year of her life. When she changed back to red, her life returned to normal...until now. Maybe another change will push her in the right direction again? It's too confusing to track, but she knows she needs to do something to look as different as she's been feeling.
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Hyde steps out of a cab in Times Square and heads toward the MTV building on 44th street. He's only been in the city for a few hours now, but he feels more energized than he has in a long time. This has nothing to do with the possibility of seeing Jackie, of course. Nothing at all. He hasn't even thought about her in at least...five minutes.
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He walks past a number of skin shops and shakes his head in amazement, wondering how they're able to operate out in the open like that. In Kenosha, the peep shows and nudie bars have to operate on the outskirts of town. But this is New York, and apparently the people here are so badass that they walk past hookers on their way to work without batting an eye. Hyde suddenly feels slightly less cool than he did before he arrived.
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He pushes open the heavy entrance doors and takes the escalator to the lobby of the building. An escalator to the lobby—that's how freakin' big this place is! Grooves Live has a pretty sweet office building in the center of town, but it's nothing like this.
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After taking the elevator to the 40th floor, he checks himself in with the receptionist and takes a seat. There are monitors everywhere, like something out of Logan's Run. He's going to have to crib some of this style for the Grooves offices, because this place is a cool factory.
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As he waits, he absentmindedly watches John Cougar strut down a dirt road wearing black leather chaps, a call girl on each arm to the strains of "Hurts So Good". Not bad for a guy from his part of town, but there's nobody who can pull off leather chaps. Not even Hendrix.
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The secretary calls his name and leads him into a corner office to meet with the VP of original programming.
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"I like what you've done with the place" Hyde tells him as he shakes his hand.
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"Well, the inmates are kind of running the asylum here, but it seems to work" he laughs as he gestures for Hyde to sit. "Before we jump into things, I wanted to let you know that I had a chance to look over the proposal and we're all feeling pretty positive about the event."
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Hyde audibly breathes a sigh of relief. "Yeah? That's cool." he nods, waiting for this guy to give him more detail.
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"The only sticking point right now for us is the location. We're trying to keep costs down, so if we figure out a way to do it in the NYC area, you've got yourself a deal" he smiles as he cocks an eyebrow toward Hyde, signaling he'd like a new pitch.
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He runs his hands along the top of his jeans and thinks fast. "What about Jones Beach?" he suggests. "Can you get permits for us to do it there?"
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The VP chuckles. "I can if you can you convince a bunch of hot girls to wear bikinis in New York in chilly April?"
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Hyde leans in. "How hot are we talking?" he jokes.
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The man leans back and gestures toward the television monitor in his office. "That hot."
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The man with the sunglasses turns his head to check out the goods, only to find the 'goods' to be his feisty 5'2" ex-girlfriend doing a live man-on-the-street interview segment. His eyes widen. She looks even more beautiful than he remembers, but he thinks that every time he lays eyes on her.
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"Hot right?" he smirks knowingly. "We picked her up in Chicago."
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"Yeah, I know" he says without thinking, eyes glued to the monitor.
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-on the television-
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Jackie stands on the corner of 44th Street and Broadway, holding a microphone, randomly interviewing standers by.
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She stops a group of passing drunk college boys and asks "Who's the bigger 'loser of the week' - the idiots who stole Ronnie Van Zant's gravestone in Florida or Ozzie Osbourne for relieving himself on the Alamo in Texas?"
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"The gravestone dudes, for sure!" a guy with a backwards baseball cap screams into her mic. "That was just malicious, you know? A total dick move! Can I say dick on air?" he looks to his friends for confirmation, but they are too busy giggling while trying to take a peek down Jackie's shirt. "Ozzie, man...it's okay, sometimes when you gotta go you gotta go." he shrugs and then tries to wrap his arm around her waist.
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"Well guys, you heard it here first—defacing a famous person's grave makes you a bigger loser than defiling a national treasure. As you've all no doubt heard, Ozzy is having a big month. First the bat incident and now Peegate. We at MTV have a little tip for you Ozzie, remember to take a pee break before visiting your next historic landmark. This is Jackie Burkhart, back to you, Kurt!" she smiles widely until the red light on the camera goes off.
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- in the MTV offices -
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The VP chuckles a bit. "Not bad, right? She's pretty good at her job too. Initially we hired her because of the way she looks, but she's really surprised us."
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"Where is this being filmed?" Hyde asks, trying his hardest to sound casual.
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"Just out there" he responds. "Why don't you take a look for yourself?" he offers.
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Hyde stands and walk toward the window nervously. He peers down and witnesses Jackie giving the guy she just interviewed a swift elbow to the gut, forcing him to release her immediately and crumple to the ground. That warm feeling he gets in his gut when she's around immediately fires back up again, and watching her kick some dipshit's ass only makes that warmth burn hotter.
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He smiles as he watches her smooth out her hair and walk over to the camera man for a moment to chat as if nothing ever happened.
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"Somebody is smitten. You'll have to get in line, buddy, because half the guys here are waiting to take a crack at her" he discloses, which quickly turns that warm feeling in Hyde's gut into red hot rage.
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"Are we good to go with this Jones Beach thing?" he asks, eager to get outside and 'run into' Jackie.
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"Have Angie get me the adjusted rundown and I'll have a line producer draw up a new budget for you" he tells him, standing up to shake his hand.
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Hyde smiles and gives the guy a firm handshake. "Thanks for meeting with me man. I'm really looking forward to working with you guys."
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He nods. "Likewise. I was a big fan of your Tom Petty concert, so I feel good about us hooking up. I'll give you a call in a few days to hammer out the details."
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"Talk to you soon" he says with a head nod and turns to leave the office. As he walks toward the elevator doors, his heart stars beating as hard as Bonham hammering out "Moby Dick".
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She may be just outside the building, but she's a million miles farther than that in reality. What the hell is he going to say to her that she would actually take seriously. That is, if she doesn't go running for the hills the moment she lays eyes on him. How many more ways can he possibly fuck this up than he already has. Then again, he's running out of jackass material, so this has to go well solely based on probability and odds.
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Out in the middle of the intersection, Jackie wraps with the producer and hands him her mic. From the corner of her eye she notices Michael, who is waiting for her on the sidelines. She skips over to him and he envelopes her in his arms, pulling her close. "Hey baby" he whispers in her ear, evoking a warm tingling into her chest.
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"Hey" she responds. "You here to rescue me?"
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"Are you done for the day?" he asks, his aquamarine eyes hinting at the promise of a surprise.
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"I may have to go back at some point to record a little voice over, but other than that I'm free" she tells him as she winds her arms around his neck.
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"Wanna see a matinee?" he offers. "A friend of mine is in it, so we'd get in for free. Good tickets too."
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"I'd love to!" she squeals. "I haven't been to a show in New York yet and no boy has ever taken me to the theater before in Wisconsin. Is that sad or am I just an unsophisticated hick from the Midwest?"
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He stops to think for a minute. "You're definitely not a hick, unless hicks wear Gucci. It is sad though, but only because you've clearly had a run of crappy boyfriends who don't know how to treat a woman."
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"Well, you're right about that" she purses her lips in thought.
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He kisses her gently. "Maybe your luck is about to change?"
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Her eyes light up and she kisses him back hard. "Maybe it is."
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"Come on" he says as he pulls her onto his back for a piggyback ride. "I'll even swing for a slice of Ray's before we get there if you're nice."
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Jackie furrows her brows. "Hey! I'm always nice!"
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Michael laughs. "No, you're not, but that's why I like you."
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Hyde exits the building and turns in a circle to get his bearings. He quickly spots the cameraman and crew packing up their gear and jogs over to them. "I'm looking for Jackie Burkhart, is she here?"
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"Sorry" the grip says as he coils a wire in his hand. "You literally just missed her."
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"Fuck" he exhales, running his hand through his hair. "Do you know where she went?"
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"No. Her boyfriend came to pick up up and then sort of threw her on his back and rode off with her. Some guys know how to sweep a lady off her feet, I guess" he shrugs.
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"Her boyfriend?" he repeats in disbelief.
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"Aw shit. I didn't get her in trouble did I? I know MTV likes to keep the on-air hotties 'single' but I figured the suits knew she had a boyfriend since he's picked her up every day this week." he grumbles. "Hey man, can you keep this between us? Jackie's a nice girl and I like my job."
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Hyde numbly nods and wanders down the block going nowhere.
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Donna waits anxiously in the salon chair for Fez to finish working on his masterpiece. She kneads her hands nervously and shifts in her chair, gazing occasionally at the mirror, which her friend has covered up with a spare smock.
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"Ugh. If you're going to have ants in your pants, at least have the decency to take them off!" Fez complains as he sprays his creation with copious amounts of hairspray.
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"Are you done yet?" she coughs. "I haven't spent this much time in a chair since my SAT's" she frowns.
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"True beauty doesn't happen overnight" he edifies.
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Alarmed, her body becomes rigid. "I have to stay here overnight?"
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Fez laughs. "No, you annoying bitch. It's just an expression. Jeez, Jackie was right when she called you a hayseed." He turns her chair around to face him, then reaches over and pulls the smock down from the mirror. "Behold!" he announces as he turns her chair around to face the mirror.
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Donna stares at herself intently for a full minute without saying a word.
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Fez taps his foot nervously, waiting for a reaction. "Well?"
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She smiles giddily. "I love it! I just can't believe that's me in the mirror! Thank you Fez!"
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She tosses her newly permed hair around, fingers luxuriating in the big, sausage curls her tresses now sport.
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"Ai! Stop touching it. I just set it" he pouts. "You shouldn't wash your hair for about two days, though from what Jackie tells me about you, that should be no problem."
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Donna rolls her eyes, then moves them back to the mirror to admire her own image. "I feel like Brooke Shields!"
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"Pretty" he says as he touches her curls. "Well, I gotta go meet Alex."
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Donna's expression falls as she hears news of his departure. "Hey Fez, can I talk to you for a minute?"
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He shrugs and pulls himself onto his work station to sit.
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"About Alex...I know, okay?" she discloses, hoping he doesn't get mad.
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"Okay" he nods. "And?"
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"Well, um...I'm not judging. I want you to do whatever makes you happy, but...I'm concerned" she tentatively remarks.
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The foreigner's mouth settles into a flat line. This whole situation is new to him and he doesn't really feel like dissecting it or explaining why he's pursuing it. "What are you 'concerned' about?"
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"Um...there's this thing going around and I'm worried you might, I don't know, get sick" she shrinks, hoping this doesn't incite his wrath.
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Fez is completely confused. "What thing?"
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"It's called GRID and it's killing people, Fez. Mostly gay men" she informs him. "I've been reading a lot about it in The Village Voice."
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"But I'm not gay" he tells her, hoping this excludes him from the group of men at risk.
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Donna's face looks pained. "I don't know that it matters if you're bi or gay, so long as you're sleeping with guys. They think it's sexually transmitted."
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"I'm not sleeping with Alex" he says, "We're just fooling around."
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The redhead is surprised. She's sure she heard him climaxing through their thin walls. "But Fez, I heard you two..." she insists delicately.
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"I'm not having sex, it was just a blow job, and it was Alex who was giving one to me" he tries to assuage her fears.
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Now more confused than ever, her expression is pinched. "You're not, you know, reciprocating in any way?"
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Fez makes the gesture for a hand job. "I told Alex I didn't think I'd be able to go further than that. I just...I don't know. I like her, but I'm not really into guy parts, so I don't know if I could, you know, give her what she's giving me. I mean, I don't want to rule anything out, but men don't exactly turn my head when they walk down the street. Not like women do, at least. I thought she was a girl when I met her." he explains.
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"Just promise me that you won't..." she has absolutely no idea how to phrase what she wants to say without embarrassing him, but his health is at stake and she's not going to let her bashfulness be the reason Fez gets sick. "Just don't stick anything in anything, if you get what I'm saying. And don't give any blow jobs."
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Fez buries his face in his hands. This is the single most awkward conversation he's ever had in his life. "I wasn't planning on it" he assures her. "I'm not planning on changing my lifestyle Donna, I just wanted to experiment, you know, see where this goes." he says. "I don't want to let society tell me who I'm allowed to be attracted to, but it just so happens I prefer women, okay. I'm not saying things won't get that far with Alex - I don't know, but I'm only going to do what I'm comfortable doing- - - and that does not include...what you were talking about."
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Donna lets out a sigh of relief. "I really just wanted to warn you. I mean, I like Alex, and I'm sure she's not sick, but you never know, right? She might not even know." she asserts. "I just...I know I'm not the warmest person all the time, but I do love you, and I'm just looking out for you."
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Fez hops off his station and brings Donna in for a hug. "Thank you, my beautiful empress, it means a lot. I don't have too many people who care about me living in this country, so it means something that you're worried, and I promise Fez will be careful."
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She smiles as she grabs Fez's face on both sides. "You'd better be, or living with me will put you at more risk than any STD." she teases.
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Jackie sits in the fourth row in the center of the Palace Theater, gripping a Playbill.
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Michael kneels at her feet and hands her a glass of champagne.
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"Thank you." She takes the glass and then the corners of her mouth turn down. "Where's yours?" she asks, looking around.
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"I have to run backstage for a little bit. Are you okay here on your own?" he checks, hoping his desertion won't upset her too much.
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Jackie's gut reaction is to scream at him, accuse him of abandoning her and of not liking her enough to be a good date. For some reason though, she feels perfectly content. Is she becoming less insecure and more mature or is Michael just really good at making her feel at ease? Or maybe she doesn't care that much about him?
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"Take your time" she tells him as she kisses him gently on the lips. "I have the best seat in the house. I'll be fine" she assures him.
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He runs his fingers through her dark curls and kisses her back. "Thanks for being such a doll" he says as he takes off for the interior stage door.
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Doll? It feels weird to her hearing that word tumble off of another man's lips. Her face falls and a sick feeling replaces her earlier one of contentment. She opens the Playbill for distraction and her mouth forms a perfect 'O' as she discovers a little surprise while reading the cast list.
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Michael said earlier that they were able to get tickets because he has a friend in the show. Well he should—in fact, he should have lots of friends in the show considering he's starring in it. She runs her finger over his name in the cast list and takes a sip of her champagne. In a million years, she never imagined having a date like this.
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"Janet, I'm home!" Hyde calls out as he slams the door to his hotel room shut.
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"Jack!" Eric stubs out his joint and emerges from the bathroom looking a bit raggedy, yet tanned and healthy. "How'd you know I was here already?"
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"They told me you checked in when I went to see if I had any messages" he informs him as she crosses to give Eric a bro hug. "It's good to see you, man. Really good." Finding himself oddly emotional at their reunion, Hyde claps his friend on the back hard.
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"Ow. Damn Hyde, I'm dealing with a slight sunburn situation back there" he complains, however unable he is to wipe the smile off his face.
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"You're approaching the Pam Burkhart-level of tan. Were you doing fieldwork in Jamaica or something?" he jokes, chuckling with amusement.
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Eric is uncharacteristically quiet for a moment, then sits on the bed. "Can't say I find the Pam Burkhart comparison flattering. Once you've seen a woman face-plant into a plate of flan, she doesn't exactly hold the same allure," he deadpans, as he adjusts his hat.
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"Hey, what's with the Father Mulcahey hat?" he asks, pointing to his Panama. "Is this like, a new affectation or just another example of you being really uncool? Not sure that hat flies in New York."
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The beach bum fake laughs. "First of all, you sound like the devil. And second of all, I'll have you know Teddy Roosevelt used to wear one of these. And he lived in New York City."
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"Yeah, that doesn't exactly help your cause" he smirks as he sits on the edge of the desk.
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"How'd your meeting go?" he inquires.
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Hyde scratches his head and tried to erase the words 'Jackie' and 'boyfriend' from his mind. "Not bad at all. We're gonna do the series in New York now," he tells him.
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Eric leans in. "Seems like you'll be spending quite a bit of time here, then."
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"Yeah, don't get any ideas, she has a boyfriend" he grumbles.
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"How do you know that? You've only been here a few hours. Damn you're fast with the intel" he laughs.
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"She works at MTV, remember?" he reminds his skinny friend.
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"You saw her? What did she say? Does she have any information about Donna?" he excitably berates Hyde with questions.
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"Slow down, Esmeralda. I saw her but she didn't see me" he frowns. "By the time I caught up with her she was gone. One of her crew members said her boyfriend picked up up from work" he recounts bitterly as he fights to keep his Zen intact.
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"Oh" he remarks with disappointment. "I'm sorry to hear that, man."
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Hyde shrugs. "Bound to happen, right? I mean she's hot and she's, you know..." his voice trails off as he feels a sharp tug in his gut.
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"Well, I don't think you should give up. I'm not giving up on Donna." he declares with the resolution of a man enlisting to go to war.
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"I hate to break it to you Forman, but they've both given up on us" he says as his features clench tightly to avoid betraying his feelings.
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"That" Eric smiles "is where you and I differ, my friend. There's an old Jamaican saying that goes 'That, which is yours, will always be yours' and I believe it. Donna is mine and she'll always be mine..." he declares. "...and I'll always be hers" he admits quietly.
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"Wish I shared your dumb optimism, Opie, but I live in the real world where moms abandon their kid to fend for themselves when they're only in high school." he quips.
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Eric's brows knit as he gestures in the air. "Is that the same real world where that same abandoned kid gets taken in and treated like a son by the kindly parents of their best friend?" he retorts.
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Hyde sighs, knowing he's been bested. "Fine. But I'm still right about Donna and Jackie. And that reminds me, you need to call mom, because I don't feel like lying to her much longer."
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"You seem a little tense" Forman says, green eyes flashing with mischief.
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The Zenmaster licks his lips and steels his gaze. "You holding?"
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"A little" he shrugs and kicks the doctor's satchel toward his best friend.
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Hyde kneels down next to the bag and opens it. "All I see is a few bags of coffee" he gripes, disappointed.
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Eric flips his finger in the air. "Look under the coffee" he hints with delight.
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He removes the coffee, placing it to the side of the bag on the floor - - quickly revealing a stash the size of an overblown beach ball. His mouth falls open as he looks nervously at his buddy. "Exactly what kind of farming were you doing while you were in Jamaica?"
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He crosses his arms over his body and smugly purses his lips. "One of my friends there thought I might benefit from having a little nest egg, you know, just to get me started."
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"Looks like a nest egg the golden goose might lay, man." he comments, shaking his head in disbelief. "I can see now why you wanted to take the train. What are you gonna do with it all?" he asks as he runs his hands lovingly through the piles of kind bud.
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"Besides smoke it?" he laughs. "I already took care of that" he grins as he pulls a crumples up flier from his pocket and hands it to his friend.
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Hyde unfolds the paper and raises an eyebrow.
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"I left some at all of the big clubs around town. I rented a locker at Penn Station. People can slip orders into the locker, and I'll do a club run on Friday night to deliver them." he explains, having already worked out all the details. "Should net me enough money to float me until I can get a job." He opens an interior pocket in the satchel and extracts a joint, lights it then hands it to Hyde.
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"How are people in the clubs supposed to know you're the guy with the locker?" the afro'd man asks skeptically as he takes a drag.
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Eric tips his hat and smirks. "I'll be the uncool guy in the Panama hat."
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A/N – I felt I had to include the GRID (aka what AIDS was called in the early 80's) stuff in this fic because you can't have a guy fooling around with other guys in this time period and not at least mention AIDS. This story has completely snowballed bigger than I originally anticipated, but I'm having fun making it wild, so I'll ride it out. As Hyde might say, I'm going "Wherever the beard takes me." Hope it's fun to read too. Let me know-by reviewing (my shameless end of the chapter appeal is so appealing, I know).