Chapter Seventeen: Selena's Song

After Jeffrey's arrival back home and Mary's almost firing (which Selena had stopped), Selena hadnt been herself. She was unusually quiet and spent most of her time fiddling with her piano or guitar. Mary hadnt been sure how to approch her. She was also slighty conufsed, but on a more personal level. She had never had to rely on anybody when it came to her job, come to think of it she had never had to rely on anyone period. Yet the facts of the matter were that if Selena hadnt stepped in she would have been fired. Which was odd.

Christianna on the other hand was different. She was always keeping an eye and ear out for something to happen. She had become so expectant that it was starting to be a little annoying. She consistantly wanted Mary to do something. And when she didn't she was awfully disapointed.

Jeffery was another matter. By that, I mean he was the most clueless. He seemed oblivious to the fact that something at the house wasn't normal. He was just so happy that Christianna hadnt caused any tears or trauma at school and that there were no more police escorts for Selena! All Jeffery knew was tha somehow Marianna was behind it, he just didn't know how. He couldn't believe he had almost fired her! God he thanked Selena in his mind for stepping in.

But when it came to Selena and where Mary currently stood with her, it was in the complete unknown. Somedays Selena was quiet, yet still polite and possitive towards her and other days it was as if she wasn't even in the house. It was driving her crazy! She had always known what was going on with her 'charges' but she couldn't read Selena at all! Mary was now deterimind to understand what was infact going on.

Just before Selena went back to school, her and Ashley's guitar lessions came back into session. Christianna was out for ice cream with Jeffery so they could work quietly.

Mary was the only other person hanging around the house. [Tabitha and Louise were on Holiday. Tabitha visiting her sister in Vermont and Louise went on a trip with some friends.] She was walking around the house with absoulutely nothing to do. Selena and her friends were having their lesson and She didn't want to interupt. She had been in the library and had noticed that Ashley had dropped off a bag of books they had gotten from the Public Library. Out of curiosity she opened it and almost laughed. Inside had been all of the sorces they had most likely used to figure out who she was.

Suddenly Mary stopped, she heard the sound of music floating into the Library. She followed it and it lead her to Selena's room, {no surprise!} Ashley and her were strumming their guitars and singing as their instructor clapped to the beat.

We got along, we got along until you did that.

Now all I want is just my stuff back. Did you get that? Let me repeat that I want my stuff back.

Selena sang.

You can send it in a box, I don't care just drop it off. I wont be home

Ashley continued.

Mary couldn't help but smile. No matter what mood, something she'd noticed about Selena is that even if she's in the most depressing mood ever, if she's singing a happy song, you'd think she was really that happy. If she was feeling rebelious but was singing a 'innocent' song, you'd think she was an angel.

So here she was singing a [Potential] Break-Up Song. And you'd think she was really yelling at an ex.

Mary's thoughts were intrupted by the chours.

Your not livin', till your livin'. Living for meeee

Your not gettin', till your gettin', getting to meee

Your Not Winnin' till your winnin' winning meee

Your not living till your living, Livin' for Me!

This is the, Potential Breakup Song,

Our Album Needs just one, Oh Baby Please,

Please tell me!

This is the potential breakup song

Our Album needs just one which will it be?

Which will it be?

You can try, you can try

But you know I'd be a lie

Without me your gonna die!

So you better think clearly,clearly

Before ya nearly, nearly

Messup a situation that your gonna miss very dearly C'mon!

Your Not Living till your living, Living for me

Your not gettin', till your gettin', getting to meee

Your Not Winnin' till your winnin' winning meee

Your not living till your living, Livin' for Me!

This is the Potential Breakup song, )Our Album needs just one

Which will it be?

Which will it be!

Their instructor clapped as they finished. "You guys do Aly & A.J. Even BETTER than Aly & A.J." he joked. "Sadly though we can not do anymore because I have a exam tommorow that I need to study for. Goodbye!" he called as he headed out.

He passed by Mary in the hall and gave her a polite 'hello' as he walked. Mary walked back to the door. And looked in.

Ashley was gathering her stuff. "Oh Selena, I got some reletively bad news."

"How bad?"

"It depends, on how soon that cast comes off."

"About three weeks to 6 weeks. Depends really on how fast it heals. Why?"

Ashley nodded nervously. "The cast list went up yesturday and we got call backs, You, Me and Kira up for the part of…"

Selena cut her off. "Shh, code it please! It's just awkward."

"Ok… Were up for the lead and call backs are In two days."

"What! NO!"

"I'm sorry Selly. I tried to get an extension and it didn't really work out. It used to be in three days and now it's two. Im really sorry." She told her best friend.

Selena gave a small smile. "It's okay Ash, it's not your fault. If it cant be me than I hope its you. So do me a favour and knock Kira out of the water at callbacks okay?"

Ashley nodded. "I'll do it especially for you!" she said. "Now I have to go now, dinner soon. Bye Selly."

"Bye Ashes!" Ashley picked up her stuff and Selena buzzed the driver to take Ashley home.

Selena picked up her guitar and laid on her bed, strumming the strings unenthusiasticly, when she heard the door open. Mary walked in.

"I heard you guys playing" she said as she walked over to Selena. "Your really good."

Selena sat up. "Thanks"

"So why cant you go to the call back, your arm is casted, not your legs." Mary asked her.

"It's the rule. If any preformer recives any injuries that require medical attention and absence will be passed for any role they have or are up for" She told her solumly. "But something tells me you came in here for something more than a compliment and a curiousity in the school theater policy."

"I did." She replied.

"And why do I think it's about certain events that I don't feel the need to name because we both know what they are."

"Because it is." Mary told her.

Selena nodded not looking her in the eye.

"Just tell me one thing, Why didn't you let your dad fire me? You had plenty of reasons to let him. I caused you a near death experience, you actually died on my account, because of me you cannot be apart of a drama event that you really want to be apart of, I've done nothing but lie to you and drive you crazy. But you still came to my rescue, was it because you felt you owed me something because I saved your life after that incident. Because you owe me nothing."

"Do you really think that's why I did that?" Selena asked her.

"You tell me! You come to my rescue but after you ignore me. Even before that, you were like that to me! So sorry, but I'm a bit confused."

Selena sighed. " I didn't do that because I felt like I owed you anyting ,everything I've done is because of what happened to me."

Selena got up and walked over to the window, Greggory across the street was by his window practicing some choreography for the drama production. She'd give anything for a goo balloon attack right then.

"What exactly happened to you?" she heard Mary ask.

Selena knew there was no avoiding this. "I don't know what happened. That's the thing!"

"Youre making absolitely no sense! Explain what you mean please." Mary said to her.

"I don't have the faintest clue of what exacty happened that night. All I know Is that one minute I'm bleeding by guts out on the cement of the park and the next Im in a hospital for who knows how long and all I suddenly know things that I never knew before and that you suddenly know things that I never told you or anybody! Do you not understand how weird that is? I'm feeling all raw and exposed because somebody who untill recently I was trying to get out of my life suddenly knows things and is apart of my past and has seen a side of me that had never been shown."

Mary just stood there as Selena talked.

"I have never EVER told people truthfully how I feel and I have never EVER in my life brokendown. All I know is that I apperently did to YOU and I have no recollection of this. Because of that I feel as if I have no protection from everything and I havent been myself because of that! I don't know what to do. And It's all your fault!"

Selena walked off into the bathrooms. Mary followed. "You don't honestly think it's been easy for me do you?"

"Yeah, I know about the whole having to live in disguse thing because somebody had a big mouth and eventually mad you into some Disney Icon… See that's exactly what I mean! I shouldn't know what, but I do!"

Selena walked into the closet area and sat on a chair by the window on her section, Mary followed her.

"Your not the only one here with things they have to hide and keep to themselves, your not the only one who since this whole thing has started had felt confused and unprotected. At least you got somewhere to go, people to turn to. I was just thrown into this modern day world with no idea what anything is and what things are like." Mary said

"I could already tell that by your clothes…" Selena added truthfully.

"This whole situation were in is unpleasent for us both. Your not the only one who's confused. Before I wouldn't of needed your help to keeping by job, in fact that situation wouldn't of happened because you would have never of gotten hurt. But you did, and it's my fault and I have to now live with that forever! I have to live with the memory of the blood pouring all the way down the path way, I have to suffer the image you're your lifeless body in that pool of your own blood under that tree , I have to deal with the fact then when I chased after your soul that because of me you were almost lost to death. And it's all because of me. I have burdens to bear as well Selena." Mary told her.

"Chase after me?" Selena said. "What do you mean?"

Mary froze realising she had something she shouldn't have. Things like that were not meant for people to know, That is why Selena had no memory of it! But Mary had promised to tell her truth and she expected to keep that promise so she told her.

Mary explained that Selena had infact passed on back at the park, and that Mary went after her. She told her of everything that happned and that Selena had almost been lost when they tried to escape the hall. She then told her of how she brought her to the hospital and then how she eventually woke up.

Selena sat silently on the chair digesting everything Mary had told her. Mary stood, waiting for her to speak.

"Why did you do that?" was all she said.

"What? Save your life?! Because I could, Because I wasn't just going to let you die when it had been my fault and I could do something about it, Because…."

Mary sat beside her and Selena turned towards her. "Because not for one second did I hate you. Not even when you hated me. I never even wanted to hate you. I couldn't help but like you right away because of some many things. Weither you like it or not Selena you are emotional, just not in that way. You show everything it's just usually covered by something else. For example, your hurt about your father' broken promise was covered in anger. But I could still see the hurt when you two fought that night at dinner. Your honest, your determind, you let nothing get in your way. Any because your so much like your mother, but also completely original. Which sounds like some Oxymoron but for some reason it's true!"

"How could you not hate me? I made you miserable didn't I?"

"Because I could never hate you. It could mean that im a poor judge of character, but I'm pretty sure it means I Have a great Judge of character. Because Selena, Your Quite a Character, and your pretty great."

"I am totally confused by what you just said, but im going to assume you meant something like: You couldn't hate me because of my qualities or something like that."

"Alright."

"So where does that lead us?"

"I'll do whatever you want me to do."

"I Think I'm at a point where after everything that's happened and told to me that I can go with whatever you dish out at me. And since you like me so much you obviously have a good judge of character so that's something good. And anyone who was willing to do that for someone who hates them is someone I want in my life. I have no secrets from you, because since you know most already so what do I have to lose?"

"Do you trust me?"

"Yeah… I do… come with me!" she said and ran out of the room.

Mary followed a bit thrown off but the suddenness of that order. Selena walked over to her bed and picked up her guitar.

"What is going on?" Mary asked as Selena began to tune her guitar frantically.

"I wanna show you something. Get that blue folder from my desk."

"PLEASE!" Mary said trying to remind her of that as she got the folder and brought it to her.

"Thank you…" she replied absentmindedly as she set it down on the bed beside her.

"What are you showing me?"

"Something I'm working on." Selena said as she got up for her guitar pick.

"You're showing me?!"Mary said in some astonishment. She had hoped that Selena would one day feel comfortable around her enough to do something like this but she didn't exoect it that fast.

"Yeah, I trust you don't I? Besides, I need all the help I can get!"

Selena picked up her guitar again and began to strum some notes and began to sing along with them.

I know I will always be

Who I always will be

Nobody's gonna tell me what to do

And who I was yesturday

Is who I am and will be tomorrow

And I will do it all by myself

I don't need anyone…

"It's Very rough and I am trying to figure out how to make it work. Something is missing from it and I cant figure out what!"

"it sounds nice, but your right there is something missing." She said.

Selena nodded, she had been no more help than Ashley and Stephan. Ah well. She noticed Mary eying another sheet from the folder, it was one she HAD finished. She even taught it to Ashley and Stephan.

"You wanna hear that one?"

Mary nodded. "Yeah, play it!"

Selena smiled. The sheet was 'Only Fooling Myself' and Selena had written it all in one night,and the only changes that had been made were correcting the spelling mistakes.

Selena began to play:

I stop to catch my breath - And I stop to catch your eye
No need to second-guess - That you've been on my mind
I dream days away, but that's okay -
It's like I want to hear a silent sound - And then hold it in my hand
But a rose won't blossom from a ground - Of desert sand, but I like to pretend that

One day I'll turn around - I'll see your hand reach out
I'm only fooling myself, oh, - But maybe when you smile
It means you'd stay awhile - Just maybe you'd save me now

Well, now it's etched in stone - That I can't survive alone - You have the missing piece
That I need so desperately - Yes, I slip away to a day that'll never come
It's like a splash of water to my face - When I suddenly realize - That you could never find a place
For me in your eyes, and I don't know why I keep thinking

One day I'll turn around - I'll see your hand reach out
I'm only fooling myself, oh, - But maybe when you smile
It means you'd stay awhile - Just maybe you'd save me now

It's love in disguise – I Lost Track of time - I'm lost in your eyes – Lost In Your Eyes

One day I'll turn around - I'll see your hand reach out
I'm only fooling myself, oh, - But maybe when you smile
It means you'd stay awhile - Just maybe you'd save me now - Save me now
Just maybe you'd save me now

Mary smiled as Selena finished. "You really should be able to be in that show."

"Thank you. But it doesn't matter now. What's done is done. You cant change that and I cant change that, so why spend all this time fretting about it?!"

"You definitely have a very original way of thinking." She said.

"You definitely are not what I have in mind when dad first said 'were getting a nanny', but if we waste pointing out the obvious, people get really bored with us VERY fast!"

Mary couldn't help but laugh, even though nothing particularly funny happened.

Selena propped the guitar back onto it's stand.

She walked over to the mirror and looked at her scars and cuts and bruises. She sighed half-heartedky and turned away. Missing that little look Mary got when she had and idea, one Selena would shortly reconisge rightaway.

But She had not before seen it so she didn't notice it at all.

"Hello?" came the voice of Christianna climbing up the stairs and running to the room.

"Hello!" Selena called back. Christianna pushed open the door. "Wow! I'm impressed. They were left alone and there both still alive and neither one of them has killed the other. Well there's a first time for everything!" she said sarcastically.

"Selena? Marianna? You two up there?" Came the voice of Jeffery who was coming after Christianna.

"Yes." Said Mary.

Jeffery came in the room. "Hey guys, who's hungry. I got dinner downstairs."

"KFC?" Selena asked hopefully.

"DUH! It's Tuesday after all!"

Jeffery, Christianna and Selena headed downstairs. Mary followed and grabbed Selena's arm. "KFC? Whats that?!"

Selena almost laughed hysterically. "That's right! You've never had fast-food have you?"

"Fast Food?"

"You'll see…." Selena said

Mary watched in horror as she saw the greasy fries being taken out of the cardboard box and put of the plates. She saw a paper bucket full of greasy chicken wings,breasts and thighs. She couldn't believe when she saw them start to eat it eagerly.

Mary sat down and Selena servered her with a sick smile of enjoyment at the situation. "Go on Mary, it's good."

"All right, I suppose it'll do no harm to try it."

Mary took a fork and knife and began to cut a piece off of the chicken wing.

"What are you doing?" Christianna asked when she spotted her.

"Eating."

"It's KFC Mary, not dinner at the white house! Come use your hands."

Mary's eyes widened. "my HANDS?" she asked.

"Yes! Like a normal person!" Christianna said.

"If that's not too much of a stretch for you Mary." Selena said to Mary.

Mary elbowed her.

"Oh- Marianna… I mean."

"Fine!" she said.

Mary picked it up by the tips of her fingers as if it might jump out and attack her at any moment if she held on to it properly.

Selena and Christianna laughed. Jeffery just stared curiously. Not fully understanding a concept that the others did.

The dinner pretty much continued on this awkwardly.

Mary acted as if a fast-food was the most disturbing thing in the world, Selena and Christianna found that humorus and Jeffery had no clue what was going on.

Later that night, Mary listened as Selena told Christianna about the school play. Christianna felt bad for Selena, she knew how important it was to her. Mary came in as Christianna and Selena were getting into bed. Mary placed a cup of water by there beds. By Selena's she also put her prescribed medicine for her injuries.

"Good night, and drink all of that water if you can." She said. "No sence having things go to waste."

"Good night Mary." Selena said softly and sleepily.

"I don't know what to call you now!" Christianna said. "Marianna? Mary? Mary Poppins? I don't know!"

Mary smiled at her as she tucked her in. "What ever you wish, within reason that is."

"Alright." She said. "Goodnight Mary Poppins." She said.

"Goodnight Christianna"

Mary walked over to Selena as she finished swallowing her pills. "You try to tuck me in, "I'll slap you!" she said half kidding and half honestly.

Mary smiled. "Relax I was just saying good night. Good night Selena."

"Goodnight Mare"

Mary flicked the switch. The main lights when off. Christianna's star spinner [which shone small starshaped lights against the ceiling above her bed] turned on and Selena's 'Moon in my room' light activated [which shone like a personal moon in her room and even did the acurate moon phases according to the date at that time] switched on automatically. Together it was as if they were sleeping in the evening sky, a very peaceful and beautiful closed the door and went to be herself. For once, everyone at the Banks house was happy and enjoying each other.

Selena awoke the next morning and climbed out of bed, she walked over sleepily to her vanity to wake up and have the medicine that was awaiting her there. Before she reached for the pills she grabbed a tube of lotion and started to put it's contents on her flawless face…

Flawless?

Selena checked again. All of her cuts,bruises and scars had disapeared. She checked everywhere else and nothing was there. On her formerfly casted arm there was no longer a cast on her arm, just two halves of one in her trash can. She moved her arm and it was in perfect condition. "Holy!" she said.

Christianna woke up and saw her sister. "What happened to YOU!" she said happily. "when did you get better?"

"I don't know…"

Selena saw Mary in the doorway, holding the glass she had been drinking from last night. Mary had a smile on her face."And how are we this morning?" she asked her. "Ready for your call back?"

Selena got up and with tears of happiness ran to Mary and hugged her. "Thank you." Was all she said as she whispered it into her ear.

All Mary could do was smile…