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Chapter 20

"Wow Justin, this place is amazing…" Daphne stated in awe as she slowly turned in a circle, taking in every part of the spacious loft.

This was the first time the girl had been to visit the loft, and she'd only managed to get this far by her incessant nagging. It had been a long time since she and Justin had spent any time together out of school, so this was a perfect excuse. Also, Justin wanted to give Molly's birthday present to her, but he wasn't ready to face the house and the parents who had kicked him out on his own just yet.

Justin tried to smile, he really did, but he couldn't seem to force anything more than a weak and shaky imitation of one. He was glad that Daphne was there. He wanted his best friend to meet the father of his baby – it was a long awaited introduction, he would admit – but his mind was too distracted by more pressing matters to be able to act like nothing was wrong.

It had been a week since the baby had first kicked and a week since Justin realised he wasn't sure he would be able to continue such an intimate relationship with Brian, when he knew that nothing would come of it. He had tried to stop whatever they were, had been given many an opportunity but every time he started to speak, Brian would look at him with those beautiful hazel eyes or he would smile this wonderfully happy smile and the words died on the tip of his tongue. God, he didn't want to leave Brian. In fact, it was the last thing he wanted. But he knew he should. His mind and his heart were at war with each other, leaving him feeling lost and achy and distraught - and more than anything he needed the advice of his best friend.

Justin bit his bottom lip to stop himself from blurting out the words he desperately needed to say. Not only was Brian sleeping in the next room and could wake up at any moment, but he didn't want to spoil Daphne's obvious happiness by throwing all his worries upon her. Luckily, it didn't last long. Despite his best efforts, Daphne could – and always would be able – to read the blond like a book. With one brief look at him, she sighed heavily and approached his side. She turned to face him head on, leaning against the breakfast bar, with her arms folded across her chest. She peered at him imploringly.

"All right Justin, tell me what's wrong," she ordered.

Justin looked shocked for a few moments, blinking, but soon accepted he had been unable to hide what he was thinking from her. He chewed on his bottom lip as he deliberated how he was supposed to explain how he was feeling. Daphne stayed silent, not rushing him, and waiting patiently.

Finally, he sighed heavily and closed his eyes briefly. "I'm not sure this…whatever it is, with Brian is going to work out…"

Daphne furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. "But I thought you love Brian? I mean that's what you've been telling me and, well, you're having his child now…"

"I know, I do love him a lot," Justin assured quickly, "It's just…he doesn't love me - he told me himself that he doesn't 'do love' or 'relationships'. As much as I love every moment I spent with that man, I don't think I can carry on sleeping with him, living with him, having him take care of me - when I know nothing will come of it. That he's only doing it because of this baby." His hands drifted to his stomach, his eyes following and when he looked up again, Daphne could see the tears glistening in his eyes, "It hurts Daph, a lot and more than anything I've ever felt before. I can't go on feeling like this, I can't stand it – but I can't leave him Daph, I don't want to. He's one of the best things that have ever happened to me and I can't just walk away from him like I don't feel this way…" he put his head in his hands and furiously rubbed away the tears. "I don't know what to do anymore Daphne…"

Daphne shared her best friend's pain, blinking back her own tears, and automatically brought the slightly taller blond into a deadly tight hug, offering as much comfort in that one action as she possibly could. Justin sniffed loudly, dropping his head to bury his face in her shoulder, and clung to the back of her clothes.

A swooshing sound was heard to her right, like a door sliding open, and a deep, half-asleep voice spoke, the concern clear. The two friends looked over to the bedroom partitions, to see it swung open with the naked form of the brunet filling the space it left behind. He appeared completely oblivious to his lack of attire – or, he didn't care that there was an unknown teenage girl standing in his kitchen. Either way, Daphne was very impressed with what she saw. Justin saw her eyes widen and let out a small laugh of amusement.

"Is everything alright?" Brian mumbled, rubbing the sleep furiously from his eyes.

Justin pulled away from his friend and gave the older man a watery smile. "Everything's fine, really."

He appeared unconvinced, stepping deliberately towards the blond. When he reached his side, he stroked the edge of his thumb across the tear tracks on Justin's cheek, still wet. "You were crying," he stated softly, cocking his head to the side, "What's the matter?"

Justin shook his head in denial. "Nothing, really, I promise…I'm just hormonal, I guess. It's nothing to worry about. Remember, Dr. Luton said it was going to start happening more and more."

Brian still seemed unbelieving, but when the blond gazed up at him, pleading with him to just accept the story, he knew he could do nothing else but drop it, although that didn't stop him from silently deciding to investigate the truth later on.

Daphne took a step away from the couple and watched the two closely, for no other reason than she wanted to help her friend. It was clear that this was breaking him - under the pressure of what he wanted so desperately and what he knew was the best thing to do, so she would help anyway she could. She saw the moment Brian nodded, accepting the story and the moment relief flooded the blue eyes before he suppressed it. She saw the genuine concern when Brian asked him whether he had eaten something this morning and Justin's half-annoyed, half-bemused response that he wasn't a child. She saw the happiness rolling off Brian in waves when he crouched down to run his hand over the baby bump, whispering greetings and endearments to his unborn child, and the soft contented look of serenity that Justin was overcome with, as he gazed down to watch the other man's antics.

He doesn't love me, he told me himself that he doesn't 'do love' or 'relationships', that's what Justin had said, but she just couldn't see it. Just watching the man now, with his small family, made it seem as if Justin was talking about a completely different person. This man looked as if he could be the poster boy for 'love' and 'relationships'. She wondered whether Justin ever noticed how much Brian obviously cared for him, or whether he was so blinded by the harsh words of a defensive man that he would never be able to see it.

Daphne had to hide a smile by pressing her lips together when Brian, finally, seemed to notice her presence and straightened up almost instantly. He appeared embarrassed as he scratched the back of his head. He offered her a small, wiry smile and a brief "hello" which she returned with much more amusement.

"So what are you two doing today?" he questioned aloud, quickly moving towards the fridge to pull out one of the only things he would actually buy - guava juice.

"It's Molly's birthday," Justin stated.

Brian's eyebrows furrowed as he frowned slightly. "Didn't you say the party was being held at the family house?" At Justin's nod of confirmation, he continued, "Are you sure you're ready to face your parents already?"

"No," the blond admitted with a sigh, "But I don't want what happened between me and my parents to affect my relationship with Molly. It's her eighth birthday and I have a present that I want to give her. I can deal with a few minutes with my mom and dad."

"And if anything happens, I'll be there to stop it," Daphne piped in. "Rest assured I'll give them a piece of my mind if they try to start anything. I've been wanting to since Justin first told me what that bastard did."

Brian smirked. "Somehow, I don't doubt that."

The brunette flushed pink and smiled bashfully.

"So what are you up to today?"

"Sleeping, and then I have a video conference with White Lotus – it's a Japanese lingerie company that wants to expand their market into the States. Apparently, the owner is unable to make it into the country at the moment so I have to show them the boards late tonight. Ryder wants me awake and alert," Brian shook his head slightly. Justin could just see his displeasure at the wasting of a day, but knowing he had no other choice.

The brunet finished his drink quickly and placed the glass in the sink. He wrapped one arm around Justin's waist and used the other to push the hair back from his face, his head tilting backwards as a result. Brian absentmindedly rubbed the strands of blond hair between his thumb and forefinger.

"Have a good day," he muttered, leaning down to steal a kiss.

Justin couldn't stop a smile crossing his face at the simple gesture. "Sleep well."

"I think you're being ridiculous," Daphne started as they walked along the street, away from Tremont and the loft. It was a sudden outburst, interrupting the contented silence between them. Justin shot the girl a confused and mildly surprised look, and arched an eyebrow in a nonverbal gesture for her to elaborate.

"Earlier, before Brian woke up, you were telling me about the problems you were having in this 'dead end' relationship and you asked me what you should do. You want my opinion?" she continued, "Well, my opinion is that you're being ridiculous. I don't know what you are seeing, but it seems obvious to me that man upstairs is completely smitten with you."

Justin shook his head. "Daphne, that…he isn't 'smitten' with me. If anything, I'm someone he tolerates because he feels responsible."

"Maybe he does feel responsible, yeah, but that doesn't mean he doesn't care about you. If he didn't care - if you were just someone he 'tolerates', he wouldn't have worried so much about whether you had eaten breakfast. He certainly wouldn't have been bothered about whether or not you were ready to see your parents again after what happened, or if you would be safe. He wouldn't have touched you like he did or kissed you with that much delicacy, if that was all he felt towards you." She made sure that Justin was looking her in the eye before she finished, just to ensure he understood, because she knew how stubborn the blond could be when he believed something, "You and he…you're prefect for each other, and you two are going to be great daddies to this baby, together. I think if you were to leave Brian, it would be one of the biggest mistakes of your life. He loves you, I know he does."

Oh he dared to hope…

The back garden of the suburban family home was crowded, filled with eight year old girls in trainers and party hats, excited and hyped up on sugar. Justin paused at the top of the stairs he remembered so fondly as a child, his foot hovering over the lower step as his nerves about seeing the two people who had wronged him so much, seeped into his consciousness. Daphne didn't say anything, she just watched and waited. Finally, his shoulder's straightened in determination, and he made his way down the concrete steps.

He spotted his mother almost instantly, standing tall above the heads of the much shorter little girls. Jennifer was standing by the patio table, putting bowls of sweets and other snack foods onto the metal table for the kids to get hold of. Molly was the one that pointed him out. She grinned widely in excitement, happy to see him again, and loudly announced his presence before she stood up from her seat and made a beeline towards him. She practically threw herself at him, hugging him tightly around his waist and burying her face in his clothed chest. He returned the embrace and pressed a kiss to the crown of her head. However annoying the girl was, she was still his little sister and he had missed her.

"Happy birthday Mollusk," he greeted.

"Where have you been, Justin?" she demanded an answer, not releasing him, "Mom and Dad wouldn't tell me. I've missed you."

"I've been…staying with a friend…" he answered slowly, not sure how much to tell her?"

"How come?"

"Hmm… I'm not exactly getting along with Mom and Dad at the moment," he told her reluctantly. He continued before she could question anymore, (and judging by her curious look, there definitely would have been), "But let's not worry about that. The point is, it's your birthday and I brought you a present."

She pulled away and looked up at him eagerly. Chuckling to himself, he opened his messenger bag and removed a rolled up piece of paper with a red ribbon tied around the center to keep it compact. He offered it to her.

Molly carefully rolled the ribbon off, which was a feat, considering she looked as if she wanted to just rip everything apart until she got to the present. She unrolled the paper and automatically grinned. "You did a portrait of me!"

"Yeah, I know it's not much, but I remember you annoying me about getting one done," Justin explained awkwardly.

"I love it!" Molly assured him. She turned slightly, glancing behind her, "Look what Justin drew me Mom!"

Justin hadn't even notice his mother approaching them. He'd been too distracted by his sister's presence. Jennifer was standing at a distance from her children, her hands clasped nervously in her lap and a hesitant look on her face. At Molly's call, she began to approach them. Justin kept his gaze averted and crossed his arms nervously.

"It's beautiful Molly," he heard his mother gush; "We'll get it framed as soon as possible. Have you said thank you to your brother?"

"Thank you, Justin;" she answered instantly, "I'm going to go show everyone."

Molly ran off speedily, raving about what her brother had given her, as her friends closed in and surrounded her, leaving the three behind in an uncertain silence. Daphne stood defiantly at her best friend's side whilst his eyes darted everywhere, but to look at his Mom. Jennifer twiddled her thumbs, watching them for a moment. Swallowing, she finally built up the courage to look at her son.

"Justin…I'm glad you could come," she started, "I know Molly's been missing you."

"Yeah, I've missed her too…" he nodded slightly.

"She really likes her drawing."

"Well, she's been asking for something of her own for a while now."

Silence followed.

He glanced around the garden and grudgingly continued, "Where's Dad?"

"He's in the house, watching football. You know children's parties were never really something he found comfortable," Jennifer answered awkwardly. Justin nodded once in acceptance of the answer and said no more - he was well aware of that fact. He had years of disappointing experiences to prove it. Justin turned his attention to gaze out at the events of the party once more. Although she could tell he didn't really want to talk to her, she persisted anyway. "Um…so where are you living now?"

"With Brian," Justin stated.

As much as she tried, her disapproval was clear in her body language and her automatic expression. "Oh…I would have thought you would have stayed with that Debbie woman…"

"I would have, but Brian offered me a place at his loft and I accepted," he told her.

"Does he have a spare room?" she sounded almost hopeful.

"No, we share a bed." He answered shortly, his patience wearing thin.

"Oh…" she trailed off, "So how are you, and the baby?"

"Good. We've been good."

"You're six months along now, right?" Jennifer pressed, "I can see you're starting to show…"

Justin's hand drifted to his stomach protectively. "Yes, my doctor told me I'm the size I should be at this time of the pregnancy and that I'll be gaining weight quickly over the next month or so."

"I remember the time when I had you," she smiled almost wistfully at the memory, "I gained about ten pounds in under a month – I was the size of a house. I could barely walk, my ankles were so swollen. I drove your father insane with my cravings…"

"But it'll be worth it, when he or she is here," Justin finished.

His mother nodded in agreement. "Yes, it was definitely worth it." She hesitated, debating her next question, before she spoke, "Does he take care of you...this Brian?"

"Stop saying 'this Brian' like it's his name," he snapped frustrated.

Jennifer nodded acceptingly, wisely deciding not to fight with him. "Does Brian take care of you? I mean, is he there for you when you need him?"

Justin smiled slightly, seeing his mother's concern for his wellbeing. He took comfort in the knowledge that Jennifer stilled cared about him, despite everything that had happened. "Yeah, Mom, he's been brilliant…"

She returned the look with what he guessed to be a relieved look. "Good, good, I'm glad…but remember, if you ever need it, you can always move back home…" she trailed off.

"Sorry…but I can't do that. Maybe if it was just me, maybe if I wasn't four months away from having a child of my own. I have to do what's best for him or her, and being in that house – with the way dad feels about me – that isn't it."

He saw the disappointment on her face, and although it upset him that he was upsetting the woman who had encouraged him so much in his artwork, he didn't regret his decision. Vic was right, about everything, and Justin was resolute in his plans to follow the older man's advice. Jennifer wanted to say something more, but was interrupted by Justin's phone ringing. He grappled through his bag for it and offered her a small apology smile before answering.

"Hello?"

"Get your ass home, now." Brian's voice filtered through the speakers. Justin could hear the anger and the pain in his voice and his eyebrows furrowed in concern.

"What happened?"

"We've been robbed."