A/N: another short one since I only have a little time on the laptop before I gotta go comfort someone who got punched/kicked/hit/etc.
Disclaimer: love Kevin Ethan Levin
Kevin stared at the vegetables on the display at the grocery store. He poked at the sweet onions. The dark teen blinked. He looked over to Gwen's list that was in his other hand. The only thing on his list: sweet onions.
Oh yes, Gwen was definitely paranoid.
He rolled his eyes and grabbed a ton of them before hauling them into the small basket.
Kevin hated shopping. He'd had a ton of shopping experience, courtesy of his girlfriend who was a moron. Who made an entire list just for sweet onions?
Oh right, the girl who knew he'd forget the only thing on the list and bought Twinkies instead, hoping that'd make up for everything. Because, well, who doesn't love Twinkies?
"Gwen," he sighed, putting the basket back where he found it, realizing he didn't actually need it now that he actually checked the list. And this time, he didn't forget it at a taco place like the last seven or eight times.
Kevin carried the bag of sweet onions over his shoulder and started heading for the checkout.
A list. Dedicated to sweet onions. Yes, Gwen was paranoid.
The checkout was practically totally full and he had one thing so the self-serve stupid ones would have to do. Kevin headed over in that direction, ignoring the extremely tempting cheese puffs that he passed on the way there. They definitely posed as a serious distraction.
He stared at the thing. It was long and very technological like. Kevin blinked a couple of times. He much rather would've gone to the stupid checkouts where actual people were there… to do the work for him.
Okay… Kevin analyzed the list. Nothing said sweet onions. Okay… what were sweet onions classified as? He stared at the bag.
This was going to be much harder than he had originally planned…
He turned around. No weird checkout person was standing around like they usually did so he couldn't just get one of 'em to do it for him…
Kevin looked. "Alright, not meat. Not in a box, so it's not scan-able." Kevin gave a short chuckle. "It sounds like cannibal, but not."
He stabbed at the last option: Produce. Whatever that was…
The fruits and vegetable options appeared. "Woah…" He looked at the bag in his hand. What were sweet onions? Fruits or vegetables?
He poked at them. He hated them both, but he had to guess vegetables… He stabbed the option on the screen.
A ton of other options showed up. He blinked. Alright, this officially sucked. He'd definitely, definitely rather have taken the idea of going to a checkout counter now… Kevin looked at them. A ton of vegetables. Green stuff in log form, orange stick-like stuff, something that looked green and leafy, nothing that looked like onions…
WHY DIDN'T THIS STUFF HAVE ANYTHING THAT LOOKED LIKE ONIONS?
The worst part: Kevin didn't even like onions…
He stabbed at the next page. Lucky for him, it said onions. Now… sweet onions… He slammed his hand against the screen. WHAT WAS WRONG WITH THIS STUPID THING?
Kevin whacked it a couple more times before calming himself down enough to look at it and tap the onion option.
Annoyingly enough, MORE ONIONS SHOWED UP!
Kevin whacked it once again.
And again.
After blowing off a little more steam (more whacking), Kevin crumpled up the list and tossed it over his shoulder. "Alright you stupid thing, TAKE THIS!" Kevin whacked it a bunch more times.
An electronic voice showed up out of nowhere. "Choose your type."
"Red hair, green eyes-" he started before realizing that was definitely not what it meant. He tapped the sweet onion option in the bottom left corner.
It charged it to whatever card Gwen had given to him to charge it to. Kevin whacked it a little more. It was becoming fun.
The electronic voice came back in a creepier voice. "Move your sweet onions to the bag."
"FWHA?" He whacked it a lot more, amazed that it knew exactly what he had gotten and where he had gotten it from, hence the logo in the corner of the screen. Kevin hated the self-checkout. Kevin grabbed the onions and the bag and ran for his life, hoping that the stalker-like machine wouldn't follow him home.
A/N: kevin's an idiot, but it makes him special… anyways, thx to my cuzin and my aunt and a bunch of my crazed cousin's for screaming this most of the day… MOVE YOUR SWEET ONIONS TO THE BAG AND REVIEW!
~Sky