Alas Babylon: Pt 3

"I don't freaking believe this." Jet grumbled, putting his arms down and marching right up to the middle aged raccoon. "Captain Reginald Rescue, what in hades are you and your two fighter jocks doing here?"

"Yeah, this is sacred battle bird land. The place of our ancestors." Wave complained. "You can't just go tromping and stomping around like some kind of hoodlums defacing a public park."

"You got a lot of nerve comin' here, Rescue." Storm growled, dangerously cracking his feathered knuckles. "You better get your loud and dirty fighter jets outta Babylon Garden before I have to get mean."

The two sides glared at each other angrily until Rescue's wingmen jumped in.

"Now, just hold on everybody. Let's all calm down and try to work this out." The female mongoose protested putting her hands up between the two commanders. "We're all here to find the Chaos Emerald alter. It would be best if we concentrated on doing that."

"Your absolutely right, Lieutenant. We can't let old grievances get in the way of saving the world. So you guys are looking for the Chaos Emerald too, huh?" Techno added, looking over her maps and charts. "Well, you may be on a mission for the Royal family of West Side but you're still on Battle Bird land."

"She's right." Jet added, a smirk on his face. "I'm calling the shots here, tubby." He told Rescue, pointing a finger at the captain's fat gut. "So, I want you to send the rest of your little fighter squadron back to base. It's just you, Mina, and us… unless you wish to cause an international incident, if you know what I mean." The raccoon glared at him, angrily, before motioning to his troops.

"All pilots stand down, report back to base and await farther instructions." The other West Siders left reluctantly as Rescue and Jet tried to work out what they were going to do next. "Our records stated that the Battle Bird capital was built around the shrine. So what we're looking for should be in the very heart of the city."

"For once we agree, Captain Lardbutt." Jet added, waving a wing to the other birds. "Everybody fan out. "Search every corner of the ruins until you can find some kind of clue. Rescue and I will wait for you in the ruins of the great hall." The other birds and Mina all saluted before running off to various corners of the ruins.

"My word, you sure run a tight and efficient unit, Jet." Rescue grudgingly, complimented him. "I never thought some lice-covered bird could run a brigade so smoothly."

"Whoa, nice backhanded compliment you got there." Jet muttered. "What's your problem with me, anyway? The war is over, Rescue. Why are you still treating me like the enemy?"

"Your kind will always be my enemy, wormsucker." Captain Rescue snapped back. "Every time I see one of your disgusting beaked faces, I see one of the good men under my command you shot down. We never wanted that stupid war in the first place. You're the ones who tricked West Side and South Island into going to war with each other. So you featherbrains could seize power for yourself."

"The sultan who started that war is long dead. My generation only wants peace." The hawk replied. "Why in the name of the ancient walkers do you hate all birds for what a few did long ago?"

"Because all birds have brought me nothing but pain." Rescue yelled at him, angrily. "I wish we had been allowed to defeat you in the war fair and square."

"You already did, Captain." Jet snapped. "Don't remind me." The two glared at each other for several minutes before Wave came running back.

"Hey everybody, I think I figured out where the altar might be." The swallow declared. "It was right under our feet the whole time."

"Very good, Wave. But…" Jet looked around. "What exactly do you mean by under our feet."

"Really?" Wave asked, narrowing her eyes and shaking her head. "Have you given any thought to the fact that the crumbling wall you're surrounded by on all sides is the great assembly hall." She pointed to the floor underneath them. "Like I said, literally under your feet." The pilots all took a step back and to their surprise saw a giant mosaic on the floor behind them. In the image was a shiny and glowing emerald, laid out in such a way that you could not walk into the room and miss it.

"Huh, would you look at that." Jet shook his head. "I guess the only way to the emerald is down."

"But how are we going to get through a thick marble floor?" Rescue asked. "We could fire all of the guns on our aircraft and it still wouldn't be enough."

"Leave it to me." Bean replied, excitedly riding into the room in a cart full of dynamite. "Everybody stand clear."

"What the…?" Rescue protested as he and Mina were dragged away from the bombs' center. There was a loud earth-shattering kaboom and bits of the smashed up mosaic filled the air. The excited teen of mobians descended into the caves which ran far beneath.

"Wow, look at some of the paintings on these walls." Storm said in awe. "But why are all these battle birds wearing shower curtains?"

"Those are togas, you idiot." Wave grumbled, punching her bulky partner in the arm. "Impressive as we descend deeper and deeper into the tunnels the artwork becomes more elaborate as we go down." Captain Rescue shrugged. "I suppose the battle birds simply degenerated over time, you fallen a long way from your high and noble ancestors, Captain Jet." He stroked his double chin thoughtfully. "A result of centuries of battle bird inbreeding. Got to keep those avian bloodlines pure for the bird master race. Can't marry any of those lowly mammal mobians, am I right?"

"SIR, IS IT REALLY A GOOD IDEA TO BE INSULTING OUR ALLIES?!" Mina protested. "I KNOW YOU STILL HAVE SOME GRUDGES AGAINST THE ARMADA FOR WHAT HAPPENED BACK DURING THE WAR! BUT THIS IS RIDICULOUS!"

"Don't talk about something that happened when you weren't there for, little pup." Rescue stated, getting in front of the Babylon Rouges and pointing a finger directly at Jet's chest. "Once scum, always scum."

"Why you filthy warm-blooded livebirther…" Jet snarled. "I outta peck your eyes out and tear out your innards with my talons."

"ENOUGH YOU TWO! QUIT BEHAVING LIKE ALPHA MALES FIGHTING FOR TERRITORY!" Techno snapped finally unable to take any more of the commander's stupidity. "If you bloody cretins are too busy with your wetting contest, we'll go and find the bloomin' altar ourselves."

"I don't get it." Storm grumbled, scratching his head in confusion. "What's everybody fighting about?"

"If you don't get it now Storm, you never will." Wave replied, shaking her head.

At that moment, Mina looked up and noticed one of their group was currently missing. "Hey, did anybody see where the duck went?" The others looked around in confusion until an insane cackle came from farther down the tunnel.

"Aha, there you are my little altar. I was wondering when I was going to come across you."

"It's Bean." Wave yelled aloud. "He's found the altar." As the others listened, the crazy waterfowl continued to yammer on.

"What's that, Mister Altar you want a slice of cake? Oh, I see you're watching your figure." The duck laughed. "Oh, Mister Altar, I have a friend that Nac and Bark said I should introduce you to." Suddenly, they heard the sound of a fuse being lit. "Mister Alter meet Mister Bomb."

"OH NO!" Techno squawked. "He's going to blow the bloody altar up."

Both groups of pilots dashed down the corridor just in time to see the bomb sitting on top of the alter as the fuse slowly disappeared as it burned away.

"WE GOT TO GET THAT BOMB OFF THERE!" Rescue yelled.

"NO TIME!" Mina screamed. As Jet grabbed Bean and they all made a run for it. "IT'S GONNA BLOW!" The pilots had only run a few yards when the bomb went off, disintegrating the altar and blasting all seven of the mobians back up the shaft.

"AHH!" All of the pilots were thrown free of the hole and promptly landed back on the surface once more.

"Is everybody okay?" Jet called out, looking around to see if there were any injuries. "Did everybody make it out alive?"

"Ouch. That smarts." Wave whimpered, rubbing her hand on her sore bottom end. "I'm alright, Jet. Nothing wounded here, but my pride."

"I'm okay, boss." Storm replied, getting up and dusting himself off. "Oh hey, I found a cookie."

"I'm alright, Cap-n." Techno added, turning around and plucking a scorched feather out of her tail. "Though, I'll be dousing a tail fire for weeks to come."

"I'm alright, Captian Jet." Mina replied, standing up and looking back at the tunnel entrance regretfully. "I'm afraid the same can't be said for the emerald altar."

"You… you stupid little duck." Captain Rescue snarled, marching up to the still dizzy Bean. "You destroyed the altar that was the only way we could save the world."

"Well, thorry." Bean replied. His tongue doing a lisp through his injured beak. "I didn't mean to pith you off tho much."

"You think this is a time for making jokes?!" Rescue lunged forward, grabbing Bean by the throat and throttling him. "YOU STUPID GREEN WATERFOWL! I SHOULD BREAK YOUR NECK, PLUCK ALL YOUR FEATHERS, AND SERVE YOU UP AS NEXT THANKGIVING DINNER WITH AN APPLE IN YOUR BEAK!" Bean only gurgled in response. His eyes rolling back into his head as Rescue choked him.

"Hey, let him go." Jet protested, pulling the dynamite duck away from the crazed raccoon. "Don't you dare hurt one of my soldiers. If anyone is going to strangle that little weirdo, it's going to be me." Rescue backed down as the other battle birds looked on at Jet in shock.

"What? What is it?" Jet asked confused. "Do I have something on my beak?"

"Did you… did you just save Bean from being strangled?" Wave asked in disbelief. "I can't believe what I just saw."

"Neither can I, mate." Techno added in shock. "Who are you and what have you done with the real Jet?"

"I can't believe I saved him myself." The green hawk replied in disbelief. "There must be something wrong with my brain."

"Aww, sweety, you do care." Bean added, making a girly face. "So, big softy, you do care." Bean hugged the hawk. "Say, since we're all buddy-buddy now, care to give me Wave's phone number?" Jet look at him.

"Let go of me this instant and cease making eye contact with me or I will break every bone in your body." Jet growled, menacingly. Bean merely let go and backed off with a nervous laugh.

"Well, with the chaos emerald no longer able to be charged. We're going to have to find a different way to save the world."

"Hey boss, I think somethings wrong with the shiny." Storm commented, pulling the glowing chaos emerald out of his knapsack. "Ever since we got away from the big boom-boom, the shiny has been getting shinier."

"The chaos emerald. It's been recharged." Wave squawked in disbelief.

"How is this possible?"

"The energy from the altar's explosion must have refueled the gem." Techno offered a sigh of relief. "Well, that's certainly. Helps us out but I feel sorry for whoever has to recharge the gem at Dark Gaia's next awakening ten thousand years from now."

"So like I said, what are we supposed to do now?" Mina asked again.

"We'll take the emerald back to the Screaming Eagle. It should be safe there aboard our command ship." Jet answered.

"Now, wait just a minute. Why should we trust your bird bozos with the emerald?" Rescue protested. "I could just as easily get it to the hedgehog and his friends without your help, featherbrain."

"We were given this assignment from General Edgar." Wave protested. "It was our duty to bring the emerald back. Why do you care if we have it since it's going to the same place?"

"I don't trust you featherheads." Rescue sneered. "Now, give me the emerald or there is going to be trouble."

"Now, let me tell you what's going to happen." Jet stepped up, glaring at Rescue menacingly. "Either you get your striped tail out of Babylon Garden this instant or Storm here sits on your head and expels noxious fuses."

"You know, boss. I had seven spicy bird seed burritos for breakfast." Storm smiled, understanding Jet's intentions.

"Um, I think I'm going to head back to base now." The captain replied, taking a step back from the battle birds. "Mina, stay with them and make sure they don't do anything goofy with the emerald."

"Yes sir." The mongoose replied, saluting him. "I'll give you hourly updates on our progress."

As the pilots all headed back to their fighters, Techno and Wave each put a wing on Mina's shoulders.

"Don't worry, girl. We'll show you how to relax back on the ship." Wave smiled.

"Blimey, you'll feel totally relaxed we he get done with you." Techno agreed.

"Thanks? I think?" Mina replied, nervously as they all boarded their fighters.

Back aboard the Screaming Eagle, Jet the Hawk reported to General Edgar's office with their prize.

"Here it is, sir. The chaos emerald, recharged as promised." He laid the jewel on the desk, saluting his superior officer. "With a little bit of assistance from the turncoat Bean and Mina Mongoose, we were successful in our mission."

"Very good, Jet. You never disappointment me." Edgar smiled. "But I heard that you had an unfortunate run-in with Captain Rescue while on this mission. I assure you, that this will not be a diplomatic wrinkle that will be easily to smooth over."

"They started it, sir." Jet replied, slamming his wings down on the general's desk. "Those morons can't let go of our past mistakes and move on."

"Hmm… it sounds like they have something in common with you, my young pupil." The general cocked an eyebrow.

"And what is that supposed to mean?" Jet shot back.

"Watch your tone, soldier." Edgar stood up to a height towering over Jet. "A battle bird remembers to show proper respect to his superior officers as well as his elders."

"I'm sorry, sir." Jet looked away. "But I don't understand what you mean."

"You'll figure it out soon enough, my lad." Edgar turned away to look out the viewport window inside his office. "Go now, you are dismissed for the time being."

"Thank you, sir." The hawk replied, bowing before he departed the office.

Meanwhile down in the women's barracks, three female mobians were enjoying the comfort of a hot bath, message, and sauna treatment. Relaxing in the main lounge after they were done, the three were getting manicure from a servant bird while they relaxed on velvet cushions.

"Oh wow, your recreation area is sooooo much more luxurious than ours." Mina sighed contentedly. "And these clothes, they make me feel like some exotic princess from Shamar." The three were dressed in baggy harem outfits with tight vests and veils. As the servant finished up doing, their nails and polishing Techno and Wave's beaks. She began to apply a coat of lipstick to each girl as they continued to talk.

"So what's the deal with that Jet fellow?" Mina asked. "He seems like a nice enough guy, but a bit high strung."

"The commander has his issues." Techno replied, flexing her wings as she reclined on her cushion. "He grew up without his parents and we were basically his only family."

"So, he lost his family to the war." The mongoose replied, a sad look on understanding on her veiled face. "No wonder he seems to hate us West Siders with a vengeance."

"What? Oh no, he doesn't hate West Siders at all." Wave shook her head. "He was just upset how your Captain Rescue was treating Bean."

"You have to forgive the captain his anger. Rescue lost his wife to a battle bird attack and had two raise his two younger daughters by himself." Mina shook her head. "I heard it got so unmanageable that the captain had to send his younger daughter to relatives in Down Unda during her teen years."

"No wonder he was such a bloody jerk." Techno sighed. "I just wish he had handled the situation back there better."

"But wait, wasn't that duck accompanying you guys, the Dynamite Dux?" Mina asked. "I thought he was a member of the Hooligans: Wanted for crimes against West Side and South Island."

"Yes, unfortunately, Old Bean is a traitor to sultan and country." Wave sighed. "We aren't exactly happy that he went and joined the Hooligans."

"Then, why did your captain Jet defend him so vigorously against Rescue's temper?" The mongoose asked, curiously. The other two girls fell silent and remained so for the rest of their spa time.

Outside of the Screaming Eagle, a small aircraft approached the flying fortress undetected. Several shadowy figures landed on top of the airship and began to climb their way down the sides, trying to remain undetected.

"This is it. This is where the emerald is." A fat gluttonous blob told the others. "Let's get the rock for Dark Gaia. The rest of them are dinner."

As the zeti and his shadowy minions clawed their ways towards the airship windows. The battle birds aboard had no idea of the danger they were in…