AN: Oh my god, oh my god, you guys. First of all, yes, I am alive even if this fandom is dead as a doornail lately. I know it's been almost two years but I never fully gave up on this fanfiction and I did not abandon it. Consider it an ultra-prolonged hiatus. Anyway, I'm back now and I'm on a fricking roll. I didn't write for nearly two years because I was severely ill, but I'm finally in treatment and getting proper care and feeling that spark again. Fanfic honestly means so much to me even if I'm basically an adult now. I started this fic in middle school, can you believe it? Anyway. Here's the chapter. Expect another, much more horrifying one in my usual style very soon.

Chapter Twenty-One

Kiku couldn't understand himself. He was actually sickened by his own weakness. He'd gone home immediately after the meeting with America and Britain, with every intention to confront Matthew about being America's brother. If he was dating a spy, if Matthew just using him for information, he deserved to know. He deserved an explanation!

But when he got there, of course Matthew wasn't back yet. He was still off... Wherever. Where was he?

Kiku just went about the rest of the day with his blood practically boiling, thinking of all the things he'd say to Matthew if it turned out he'd been using him to spy on the Axis. But early the next morning, when he actually saw Matthew waiting for him by the koi pond in the garden, well… One look at his anxious blue eyes and he knew he would never hurt anybody. There had to be a reasonable explanation; he couldn't just start hurling accusations at him with no preamble. He had to be gentle, as he'd learned in their other encounters.

Matthew looked up and smiled as he approached. "Hey, Kiku. I just got back. I have to go out again soon, but I wanted to stop by and see you first. What did I miss?"

Gentle, gentle. "I had a meeting today."

"Oh, really?"

"Yes. With another nation." Matthew looked suddenly alert.

"Really?"

Careful… "Yes. I'm not sure of his human name, but I think it is Alfred. Is that anyone you know?" Matthew's eyes widened in surprise and some other emotion—was that a flash of fear? He couldn't be sure. It passed as quickly as it came.

Matthew nodded. "That's my brother."

Kiku was caught off his guard by the honesty. He'd been expecting Matthew to be hiding something from him, but he'd given the information so freely. Could it be that Kiku was mistaken? Surely, a real spy wouldn't be so open. "I see."

"He's not so bad once you get to know him, I swear." Matthew sighed.

"He's different from you. But you look a bit alike. I thought he was you when I first saw him."

"Oh." Matthew looked at him oddly. "Huh."

"I mean, it was confusing. Obviously I could tell the difference once he got closer and started yelling at us in an American accent. But for a moment I didn't know what to do."

"What did you end up doing?"

"I realized pretty quick, and then I just greeted him normally. But it was odd."

"Does he really look that much like me?"

"Yes. I mean, you're more attractive. You're both attractive. Given a choice between you, him, or—" A miracle, Kiku was teasing somebody. Forbidden attraction on top of a firm foundation of friendship can do strange things to people. "Nope, he's too loud. Definitely you."

"That's a little weird, Kiku." But Matthew was laughing. "But thanks, I guess." Kiku smiled back. Their eyes met and Kiku felt that familiar warmth flooding through him, that warmth he felt whenever Matthew looked at him, the warmth that made him feel so safe he had no idea what he was doing. He snapped himself into wakefulness again, forcing himself to press the issue of Matthew's brother before he got lost in an adorable conversation and ended up kissing him again.

"So, anyway, you're brothers?" Matthew nodded. "I see. Now I know. But, Matthew, I'm afraid this might be a problem."

Matthew sighed, looking dejected but resigned. "I was afraid this would happen. It's because he's with the Allies, isn't it? He's so full of himself."

"Do you promise that you aren't trading information?" Kiku looked at him seriously. He didn't know what he would do if Matthew said he was.

"I don't do that." Matthew shrugged and coughed. "I don't like helping my brother."
"Then I guess there's nothing wrong with what we're doing. Not from the standpoint of espionage, in any case, correct?"

"What other standpoints are there?"

"I'm not sure my friends would approve. But I'm not worried."

"My friends probably wouldn't approve either. But I don't really care." He started blushing and stammering. "I've never taken many risks, but I feel like this one is worth it."

"So do I." Kiku nodded, stepping closer to him.

"I guess I feel like we just have something really special, I mean, we have a lot in common even though we're really different on the surface I think, I think m-maybe we have a future or something, not just a literal future like in two seconds but I mean like maybe even after that, like, hours or days from now, or even, like, if you wanted, maybe… I-I'm sorry, nobody else lets me talk this long, I—" He trailed off, blushing furiously. All this time Kiku had been moving steadily closer to him, a tiny smile on his face. Now they were practically nose-to-nose. "—I don't know how to handle this situation!" But he was also smiling.

"I like you when you're like this."

"I like you, a-all the time." Matthew laughed nervously.

"You're so nervous! Are you still afraid of me, even after everything we've done together?"

"I'm not afraid of you! I'm just—I don't know what to say when you're this close to me. My mind went blank almost two minutes ago but I've just been talking the whole time and I can't seem to stop."

"Can I try?"

"Wh—Huh?" He finally shut up as Kiku leaned in and kissed him. Soft, tender, passionate, and forbidden, just like them.