Happy almost new year's eve! Still hoping for one more chapter after this before I go back to the 'I have to go to work every day' grind. (My job is not that challenging.) Our boys are slowly getting toward where we need them to be by Easter! Enjoy the holiday! -Kay (formatting is wonky? try archive of our own instead.)

Assignments will be underlined.

Harry's writing will be bold.

Draco's writing will be in italics.

CHAPTER 21 -

December 30. Morning.

As Harry came into consciousness, he felt a weight against him. Something warm was pressed into his front. Harry realized it wasn't a something but a someone as he woke. He also was very aware that he was not in his own bed, and had morning wood worse than he'd had in a long time. He ran his hand down Ernie's arm as he stretched to wake himself up.

"Mmmm," Ernie groaned as he rolled away from Harry. "Mornin'."

"Apparently. My whole body aches."

"No way it's your whole body. We didn't get that far."

Harry lightly shoved at Ernie's shoulder and then stood up. "Shut up. You've got too much energy."

"You're not leaving that fast, are you?" Ernie propped himself up on his elbows.

"No, wanker, I just gotta piss."

Harry went into the adjoining bathroom and relieved himself. Looking in the mirror, he saw his throat was covered in love bites, and his arms had many scratches on them. He washed his face and ran a warm flannel over his body before pulling his pants back on and leaving the bathroom. Ernie was standing next to the bed, pulling his pants on. "Who's leaving quickly, now?" Harry smirked.

"I just figured I should be dressed for this conversation is all… but it seems that someone vanished my trousers. Got a plan?"

"Go clean up in the bathroom and I'll get my house elf to bring you some new clothes."

Harry quickly called Kreacher and had him bring a new outfit and a small breakfast for the two of them. He dressed and sat down at the table, preparing tea. Ernie came out of the bathroom, dressed, and joined Harry at the table. "So, do you want to start the conversation?"

"I guess. I'm going to be brutally honest here, I'm not interested in starting a relationship, Ernie."

"Wonderful news because neither am I." He smiled at Harry. "I'm perfectly happy for this to be just what we've already done: hands and mouths and orgasms galore. Or for it to continue, purely sexually. If you're… looking to experiment or try new things with someone you can trust, I am more than willing to be your test subject."

They looked at each other for a moment. Ernie began eating some of the fruit that Kreacher had brought him. "That's…" Harry didn't know what to say.

"Either way, Harry. I'm not gonna tell anyone if that's what you're worried about."

His eyebrows scrunched in confusion, "Not that I want to announce it to the world, but what makes you say that?"

"Just that you seemed concerned that the world know that 'Harry Potter is gay." What with the disguise last night and everything." Ernie reached across the table and squeezed Harry's hand. "You grew up muggle, right?"

"Yeah."

"Half my family are muggles. They've told me about some of the differences between our worlds. Some muggles don't treat gay guys very nicely. So I get it. I imagine you grew up very confused about all of this. Please let me assure you, I'm not going to tell anyone."

"Thank you, Ern. That means a lot to me. You're not wrong about the muggles. But it's not all of them. And I'm starting to realize that in our world, people don't really care?" he didn't mean to end that as a question, but that's how it came out.

"Most people don't care who's gay. There will be people who care simply because of who you are, though," he said thoughtfully. "It would be a situation where you'd be talked about no matter who you shag. Man, woman, veela, giant, etc. But you're used to being in the papers, yeah?"

"Yeah, for sure." The two of them talked for a while longer, and then said goodbye. Ernie assured Harry yet again that he wouldn't tell a soul about what happened. Harry let him know that Ron and Hermione already knew, as they say them leave together, and that Neville knew he was gay. They agreed to leave it where it had ended the evening before and part ways as just friends.

As Harry walked home, he realized how foolish he had been the night before. He may have made it clear he wasn't looking to shag Ernie, but he hadn't bothered to check what the other man was looking for before getting naked with him. He hadn't even made sure that Ernie would keep his secret before doing that. Moving forward, he would need to completely be sure he and his partners are on the same page before anything happens. He simply couldn't afford the risk.

December 30. After supper.

"Fuck!" Harry cried out as he completed his fifteenth pull up on the bar. He paused at the bottom in a dead hang, knowing he had one more to complete. He could feel the burn in his upper body muscles. When he had done so, he dropped to the ground and stretched out his aching muscles.

Moving slowly, he went toward his bathroom to draw a bath. He stepped through his bedroom and to the door next to his wardrobe. Opening it, he stepped into his personal bathroom. Ever since the renovations were complete, this had been one of his favorite rooms in the house. Just to his left as he opened the door was a shelving unit holding towels and dressing gowns and soaps. On the wall to his left were giant windows that showed a view of the street down below. They had been charmed to let in light and reflect the true weather, but not to allow anyone to see into the room. In front of those windows was a large clawfoot tub with small tables on either end. There was a rarely used shower on the other end of the room, past the toilet. The walls were a pristine white and the whole room had black accents.

Turning on the hottest water he could in the tub, he plugged the drain so it would start to fill. He poured a muscle relaxant potion, one that had been approved by his Healer, into the tub along with lavender soap. Hoping the smell would help him relax enough to sleep, he poured a bit more into the tub. As he stepped into his bedroom to take off his workout clothes, he noticed his journal glowing and bouncing. On his way back into the bathroom, he took the journal and a muggle pen in with him. He waved his hand over the book, thinking the Impervius spell to make it waterproof. He quickly tested his spellwork with a few drops of water from the faucet. They gently rolled off the page. Setting the journal on one of the small tables next to the tub, Harry lifted a foot to climb in.

Harry slowly climbed into the tub, allowing his skin and muscles a chance to acclimate to the steaming hot water. It stung at first, but then he could feel the heat seep into him. He took a deep breath and leaned back into the tub. Harry then proceeded to open his journal and read the latest message from Hercules.

Hey Bud. I've been thinking a lot today. Do you ever feel like even though we talk fairly often, that it's been days since we last spoke? Sometimes I feel as if… I don't really know how to explain it. Like we could talk constantly for days and still not run out of things to say, you know? I just feel like… Like I could tell you anything, and we'd still be okay. We'd still be friends.

Harry set the journal down to think about his answer before he started writing. He quickly washed his hair and body before picking the journal back up. I couldn't agree more. I'm so comfortable telling you things I wouldn't say to my best friends. And I'm not even sure that it has anything to do with the anonymity of it all, either. I feel as though I've known you forever, even though I don't really know you at all. That doesn't make any sense. I mean -

I know. I can't make it make any sense. No matter how hard I try.

Let me ask you something… What happens when you try to think of who I am?

I can't. I try to put any clues together, and my mind just thinks of my book. That's it.

Same here. Makes me think we'd be able to figure it out if there weren't charms involved.

Probably. I've been thinking about that a bit… Revealing our identities, I mean.

We agreed we wouldn't. But I've been thinking about it, too.

We have a while before we need to decide anything. Either way, we'll discuss it before it happens.

Sounds like a plan. Any reason you were feeling so reflective?

Not really. Just spent a lot of time thinking about you today.

Herc! Way to give a guy a big ego.

I mean about the suggestions you gave me. And you came up during my therapy session. That's all. I was explaining how helpful you've been to me lately. Well. Since this journal thing started, really.

I'm happy to hear that. You've been - instrumental to me as well. I've come to rely on our conversations for sanity's sake.

My healer gave me some new questions we can use to help us get to know each other better, but one's that shouldn't be hard to answer while maintaining anonymity. Some are relatively boring, depending on how we answer. Some are hobby-related. Some are downright naughty.

Sounds entertaining to me. But before we get to that, how are you feeling today? Physically, mentally?

Physically: I am feeling much much better, almost back to 100%. Mentally - today was harder than it's been the past few days, but I am still managing ok. New coping mechanisms and all that. I haven't hexed myself since, well. You know.

I do know. Without meaning to sound condescending, I'm proud of you.

Not condescending at all. Truly. Thank you. How about you?

Oh.

That could mean a lot of things.

I'll give you a hint: It was accompanied by a fierce blush. I am feeling mentally at peace and physically exhausted today.

OH. Well. Then we have another storytime upon us?

Do you really want all the gory details of my sex life?

Why does that sound judgemental?

No! Godric, no. I didn't mean it as a judgement at all. I just… I don't know that I'd enjoy hearing about someone else's sex life so much.

Well. Part of it is because I'm excited for you along your - let's call it a discovery! Another part is that I'm a bit of a voyeur, I suppose. Nothing pervy. I would never watch anyone who didn't know I was watching and want me to watch or anything. But it can be exciting.

Hm. Sort of like porn I suppose.

What's porn?

Muggle thing. You should look into it. Sounds like you'd like it. Do you know what a film is?

I know the premise, but I've never actually seen one. Sort of like a wizarding photo, right? But there's scripted words and actions. They're the same every time?

Pretty much. Porn is a film that's along the same lines as the naughty magazine I sent you.

Ah, I see! Very much along the lines of a voyeur's interest, I assure you.

So, I guess the answer is yes, we'll have another story time.

Goody!

Goody?! Seems a bit out of character for you, Herc.

Shut up. I've been allowed a bit of wine after dinner tonight. I'm feeling incredibly relaxed. And I am very ready for storytime.

You're ridiculous. Tell me one thing before we start… what are you doing right now? What does the room you're in look like, how are you sitting, etc.?

Why?

Suggestion from my healer. It will make it feel more like a real conversation than writing to a virtual stranger.

We're hardly strangers. But I will oblige. I'll be as detailed as I can. It's a fairly small room. About half the size of our 8th year common room. Built in shelves on one full wall, floor to ceiling. The opposite wall has tapestries, can't say of what. And a fireplace. Other than that, the only furniture are four large armchairs. Leather. Worn. And two small tables. It's like a reading room. Stone floor, large rug. The air is chilly, but the fire is roaring.

I am sitting in an armchair. My legs are stretched out and resting on the small table in front of me. Right ankle is crossed over the left. I have a wine goblet next to my feet. The wine is the same color as my slippers. I'm wearing muggle sweatpants and a sweater. I'm writing with a muggle pen. Is that enough detail?

That's plenty of detail.

Well, are you going to reciprocate?

Oh boy. Really blushing now. You had to tell me what you were wearing, right?

Why are you naked?

Why do you assume I'm naked?!

Am I wrong?

No.

WHY are you naked?

I'm in the bath! Relaxing before I even try to sleep is part of my therapy. I'm in a hot bath with a muscle relaxant potion mixed in. (Healer said it was okay.) I'm sitting -

I really don't need the details of how you're sitting. Naked in a bathtub is enough for me. Just describe the room and leave it at that.

Sounds like an excellent plan to me. White tiled walls with black tile borders. One whole was is windows. Charmed so no one can see in. White ceiling, white tiled floor. It's a very bright room. Even now, when the sun has gone down, lights from outside shine in and reflect off the tiles magnificently. I have no light on inside the bathroom, save for a candle near the sink. The whole room smells of lavender and chamomile.

From the potion, I'm assuming? Excellent muscle relaxers.

Yes, they are!

So, tell me the new story. When was this?

It was last night, late. I'll have to skip a few parts of my story so I don't give away who I am. Or who the other person was, as there's a good chance you know him.

That's fair enough. Just tell me whatever you can. I'll let you know where you went wrong.

It started at a bar, flirting. We were out in a group. Probably about 15 or so of us. Some of the other 8th years, but also a handful of people not in our year at Hogwarts. Even if you were there, I don't think we were noticed.

You're getting better at giving details without really giving anything away.

Thank you! I'm trying. We were all out and one of the blokes starting… chatting me up.

Nope. Couldn't have happened. Not to you.

I'm very fit. He said that to me, and that he was into me. So I kissed him. He kissed back. By the time we stopped, we were both panting. I said "I don't shag on the first date." And a few minutes later we were leaving together.

You seem to be very good at picking up blokes, you know. Implying that you'll do anything short of shagging? Instant yes.

I'll teach you how to do the same someday.

Psh. Like I need help. Please, go on. What happened when you left?

Lots of snogging on the way to the hotel. Up against walls. In alleys. The middle of the road. So much snogging.

You wanted him that much?

You've no idea. But it wasn't really him, so much as it was a willing bloke who was also a wizard.

Damn. You're hard up, aren't you?

Not anymore.

I see!

From there… Well. I'll have to change a few bits of the story. If anything doesn't make sense, just don't ask questions. Unless it's sexual. That won't give anything away.

Aye aye.

We got to the room and had a very quick conversation about the no shagging rule. And something else. Oh! And he offered to call me sir… Which was kind of odd for a moment. Then I almost left, he seemed like he changed his mind. But then he asked me to stay. Next thing I knew, I had him up against the wall and pinned his hands above his head using my wand.

So, you're into bondage?

Ignoring you. He had a very strong reaction, which I thought was negative, so I let him down, he assured me it wasn't. He said I seemed nervous and encouraged me to go with my instincts. We both agreed to say stop if we wanted to, but to just feel it from there. And we did.

Interesting.

I redid the body-bind on his arms, above his head against the wall. I asked permission, then proceeded to tear off his shirt. I was kissing and licking and biting every part I could reach.

Finally enjoying the freedom and privacy to do as you wished?

I certainly was. Give me just a moment before I continue. Bath got cold. Gonna get out. Harry climbed out of the bath and spelled himself dry. He pulled on pajamas and climbed into bed before continuing. 'Enjoying it' is putting it mildly. I was out of my mind with need. Accidentally vanished his trousers.

Accidentally. Sure.

It was accidental! Didn't even use my wand.

Which wand?

Shut up. I knew what I wanted to try, and felt bold enough because his hands were bound… so I got on my knees -

YOU DIDN'T

I DID

You gave oral to someone as the second step of the evening? Straight from snogging to blow jobs?

I did. And I loved every single second of it. The power of it. The feel of him -

You are SO gay.

I'm aware. Quoted you to him actually, but that was later. I got on my knees, accidentally vanished his trousers and yanked down his pants. I just - ran on instinct. I didn't think much about it. He seemed, VERY into it. Never said no, never asked me to stop. Begged me not to stop, actually. Then he seemed close, but I was feeling bold, as I mentioned. So I gripped him, hard and made him beg and call me sir…

Oh Merlin.

He said that, too. Not really sure what made me do that? It's nothing I've explored or been interested in in the past…

Then what happened?

Well. He begged and called me sir. I wasn't brave enough to swallow yet, though. Then he told me it was the best orgasm he ever had and was blown away (haha) when I said it was the first I'd ever given. I told him how you said I was 'gagging for it.' Then, he jumped to do the same to me, I told him he didn't have to. But then my pants were off and he was telling me I was 'hung like a hippogriff.'

Fuck, Bud.

Tell me about it. The rest of the evening was more blow jobs and us rutting against one another. My entire body hurt this morning. I'm not used to so much activity.

I'll bet. How many orgasms?

Total? Not sure. I came 3 times, though. Which I didn't think I could do. But over the course of 4 hours… Apparently, not impossible.

Sounds like a really good night. Will you see each other again?

We decided to leave it there for now. If anything else happens, it won't be romantic, just exploration for me, if I want. He was really great about it.

Well, that's nice, then.

And you really enjoy hearing about this?

It's like porn, Bud.

That's a little pervy.

If you really believed that, you wouldn't tell me about it.

Fair.

And it isn't like I can properly picture it, can I?

Another good point. Why don't we jump into those questions your healer gave you?

I'll take my favorite one from the list and add a bit to the end then… The list asks: "Is there anything you're into sexually that you'd hesitate to tell a partner?" I would add: Would you want to have a partner call you sir sometimes? Or submit to being bound? Or would you want to call him sir, or have him bind your hands?

Way to jump right into the psychoanalysis, Herc. It's appreciated. I think that because I'm so new at this that I'd try just about anything once or twice. If my partner wanted to try it, I would. Except hurting them. I don't want to do that. But I'm fairly open minded, now that I don't have panic attacks about being gay. The more people that know and don't really care, the easier it is in my brain. I enjoyed what I did last night - the binding of his hands, 'sir,' but they aren't necessary for me to have a good time, I don't think. Harry wished he could mention that he found speaking to someone in Parseltongue erotic, but that would absolutely give him away. And he had never actually tried it.

That makes sense. A lot of people try things out at the start of their 'sexual awakening' as my best mate calls it.

Your best mate sounds like a tosser.

Oh, he is.

So, instead of having you answer the same question, how about this… Is the list numbered?

Yeah.

How about I pick a number and you write the question and your answer?

Sounds good. It's 1-65, but there are 2 or 3 we can't use because they'll give us away. And I used #65.

Alright. Let's go with #2.

On a scale of 1-5 how afraid of the dark are you? Not sure if 5 is the most afraid or 1 is, so I'll answer specifically. I'm not remotely scared of the dark. I used to be. Now I find comfort in it. No sunlight, moonlight, firelight. Nothingness. There's a comfort in that for me.

Ugh. I absolutely hate the dark.

I'll come chase the monsters away for you, Bud.

Yeah, right. Your turn!

What is the last song you listened to?

Oh. It's a recording of a classical artist who I recently found out was a wizard! Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. Helps me relax. Not sure which song, it was a whole album.

He was an amazing wizard! He created some truly remarkable works.

I'd have to agree with you. I'm going to choose #10.

Turnabout is fair play, I suppose... #10: What were you doing at midnight last night? Wanking. Next ques-

Wanking?! Why you naughty, naughty man.

You were wanking ANOTHER man! You're one to talk.

That is true. I take it back. Next question?

What is your favorite expletive?

Hm. I don't generally have a terrible vocabulary. Recently found out I say 'fuck' a lot when in the throes of passion, as they say. But normally, I say things like 'bloody' and 'bugger' more than anything else. Not a fan of saying 'shite.' Don't really have a reason for that. I want you to answer the same question this time.

I don't really have a foul mouth, either.

Except when reading about my love life, apparently.

We're similar in that regard, then. I say 'fuck' when things get erotic or steamy. But other than that, I rarely use cuss words.

Your turn, again.

This is me assuming you put clothes on after your bath… What color are your socks? Boring question, but I'm suddenly dying to know.

They are grey and wool. Very soft and warm. Old man socks. You think I just lounge around starkers? I'm not mad, you know.

Ah, but I DON'T know that, do I?

# 43.

Do you have any scars? Bud, I -

Don't. Let's switch that to this: Do you have any scars you like, or that have a funny story behind them? Keep it a bit more lighthearted.

Good plan. I do have one! I have about a 5 centimeter scar on my one ankle, parallel to the ground. Got it when I was attempting to play football like a muggle. Won't say my age or anything too specific, just that I made a right fool of myself.

I'm sure you did! Someday, I hope to hear the full story.

We'll see. For now though, Bud, I'm afraid I'll have to call it a night. I'm falling asleep in my wine goblet, here.

Not a problem at all, I should get to sleep as well. Can we talk tomorrow?

Absolutely. Good night!

Good night! Get some rest!

December 31. Dawn.

"Draco?" Harry stood up from where he was stretching and walked over to the blonde. He had been waiting at the park for about ten minutes, worried that Draco wouldn't show up to their meeting for a run.

"Prove who you are," Draco said quietly but firmly, hand on his wand in his pocket.

Harry held his hands out slightly to show that he wasn't attacking and said, "You've seen me in my animagus form. True Gryffindor."

"Hm. It'll do. How'd you manage to hide the scar?" he asked, peering at Harry's face; which currently wore a glamour, but not the one from the club.

"It's not totally hidden, just faded. Ready to run?" So they did. Talking very little, they ran for nearly an hour before stopping. It was cold and rainy and Harry could feel his muscles aching already. Draco seemed to be moving slower than he did at school. Harry could only assume he hadn't been running over break at all. After a while longer, Harry said to Draco, "Ready for a break?" At his nod, they slowed and sat at the edge of a large pond to catch their breath. Harry was stretching out his legs when he heard Draco grunt and saw him reach for his calf. "Oi, mate, you've gotta stretch that out!"

When Draco simply stared at him, face scrunched up in pain, Harry reached for Draco's leg on his own. Using one hand to push his knee so his leg was straight, Harry grabbed the other man's toes and pulled them up towards his head. "Ah!" Draco exclaimed.

"Flex it. Push your toes up. It'll help, I swear." Harry tried to focus on the task at hand, but his hand found it fascinating to feel the muscles around Draco's knee clench and unclench. Suddenly Draco's calf stopped spasming, and his thigh started. Harry straddled the lower part of Draco's leg and quickly started to massage the muscles in the thigh, knowing that was the only way to stop the pain. Draco's sigh of pleasure only made Harry keep massaging. Losing track of when the leg stopped spasming, Harry found he didn't want to stop massaging. Using long, hard strokes, he pushed the acid out of the muscles and subconsciously mapped their location. He stopped suddenly, when he realized what he was doing, feeling his face flush. "Sorry. That was probably a bit too personal. It's just the only way I know to make it stop."

"Yeah. It's fine." Draco wouldn't look at him. "Thanks."

"You should really stretch out the other leg, so it doesn't happen again." Draco did. "How's your break going?"

"Fine. Nothing interesting really. I'm staying with Blaise now, in London."

"Oh? I'm in London as well. Not too far from Diagon, actually."

"Hm. The old Black Residence is yours now, right? Is that where you're staying?"

"Yeah. I forgot you're half Black. Have you ever been to the house?" Harry laid back on the grass, not caring when the cold water seeped into his clothes. "If you have, I imagine it would have been back when we were kids?"

"I think I have. Dark, gloomy kind of place? Walburga Black was a terror."

"Yeah that's the place. Although I never met her, her portrait was a piece of work." There was a long pause where neither of them spoke. Draco was pulling grass out of the ground and shredding it. "The house doesn't look like that anymore. Entirely renovated. You should come see it sometime." Harry's heart beat faster. To his own ears, it sounded almost like he was propositioning Draco.

"Yeah, maybe," Draco shrugged noncommittally.

After a few more minutes, they decided to part ways for the day with half-hearted 'Happy New Year's Eve's. Harry wished he could regret his actions of getting too physical with Draco, but all he could feel was curiosity. Draco's muscles were firm yet flexible. Harry was infinitely curious just how flexible the other man was.