December 25th, 2008~

Talk about awkward. Today I went to go see Audrey, to wish her a Merry Christmas and spend some time alone with her. Well, when I got there, she was alone. She opened the door and I just gaped at her when I saw that she was just wearing a light colored slip type of thing that hit her just above her knees.

"What are you doing opening the door dressed like that Audrey?" I frowned as I closed the door. She just laughed and walked into her bedroom.

"I was trying to figure out what to wear today when you knocked on the door Jasper…at least I had some clothes on." She defended herself. I followed her in and saw that there were clothes thrown all about on her bed. She turned after a few seconds and walked over to me…to give me a hug. Well, I gave her more than just a hug. I felt her tense for a moment before she pulled away from me, her face a little flushed.

"You aren't mad at me?"

"For what? Hugging me?" I laughed but her face was serious.

"Alice didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what?"

"I um…I have a…have a date." She stammered out.

"A date?" No, Alice did not tell me anything about this.

"Yea. You remember that guy from the hospital? He called me yesterday and wanted to know if I wanted to spend the day together. And, being as I didn't have any plans for the day…I accepted his invitation. I didn't know you were coming Jasper. I can go call him and let him know there was a change of plans and I can't go out. I'm sorry." I stared at her. Why was she apologizing? It was like she had been caught doing something that she shouldn't be doing.

"No, no Audrey…I should've called you first. I just thought I'd surprise you. But, don't change your plans because of me." But, that didn't help her…the guilt she was feeling was so intense.

"But you came all this way…I can't just leave you here in the dust."

"You wouldn't be leaving me anywhere Audrey. I can just go back home…it's no big deal." I tried to assure but it seemed like I was only making matters worse. Apparently, neither of us was prepared for this. Even though Audrey was an adult now, the thought of her actually being with someone else was still a foreign concept.

"Yes, yes it is a big deal Jasper!" she threw her arms up in the air "You're my best friend…well, you're more than that obviously. I can't just leave knowing you came and then had to turn back around and leave…that's mean." She whispered. Oh my dear sweet Audrey…always thinking about others before herself.

"Audrey, it's up to you what you want to do. If you want to go on your date…" I frowned at that, though it only made her feel worse "then go and have fun. You don't have stay cooped up in here for my benefit…whatever you want."

"Honestly?" she looked up at me…"I sort of really want to go on this date." She bit her lip, awaiting my response.

"That's fine Audrey. You don't need to be so nervous. You need to go out and live life…" I rambled.

"Doesn't sound like you believe it though." She came closer to me and took my hand in hers "is this really hard on you?"

"Honestly?" I frowned "It's so difficult…" I whispered, placing my other hand on her face.

"I'm sorry." She wrapped her arms around me and I just let her.

"There's no need angel…you yourself told me that one day I would have to share your heart with someone. Although frankly, I didn't think it would be this soon nor this difficult."

"Well it's just one date right? Who knows, maybe nothing will come out of it?" she tried to comfort me. But, there was really no point. Alice had already seen something…the day of her birthday. We were going to have a little chat when I got home.

"Perhaps." Was all I could say. I didn't want to lie to her…although I'm sure it would make her quite happy.

"Will you at least stay here until it's time to go? I still have a few hours." She looked at the clock.

"Anything." I smiled. At least she wanted me to stay here…I watched her as she went back to her piles of clothes, trying on ten different outfits for me, asking me which one I liked best. I tried to be helpful but it was hard when she looked beautiful in whatever she put on. It was even more difficult because she wasn't dressing up for me….she was fussing so much over someone else.

When it was almost time for her to go, she timidly asked me if I could send her some waves of peace…she was extremely nervous. I hesitated before I gave in, grabbing her hands in mine.

"Audrey, can I ask you something before we separate?" I asked her as we rode the elevator downstairs where she was supposed to meet her date.

"Of course?"

"Do you think that if I wasn't a vampire...if I was human I suppose that you and I would be together?"

She seemed to think about it for a moment before a sly smile spread across her face. She leaned up and kissed my cheek and quickly laid her head on my shoulder.

"In an instant Jasper Hale…you would still be the owner of my heart." She whispered as the door opened and we pulled away quickly. With one more quick embrace I watched as she made her way into the lobby where her date was waiting for her. He greeted her quickly with a smile and a hug. I couldn't help but smirk. He may be able to make her smile but, I'm the one who could get her to get that flushed look on her face every time I kissed her.

But, she looked happy and, as I walked out the other way…the thought of possibly having to share her heart with someone didn't seem so painful. I didn't like it…but, there was nothing I could do about it.

Our feelings were never going to change about one another…she told me herself.

Thoughts??