"I'm gonna rip my skin off," Shepard groaned as she fought to keep from scratching her thighs where the rash was the worst. But that would only make things worse. She hissed angrily as Thane's cold fingers rubbed Mordin's ointment on her burning skin.
"Your reaction is a bit disproportionate," he smiled, focusing on his task.
"Disproportionate?" she exclaimed. "I have to take on the goddamn Illusive Man in less than two hours! How the fuck am I supposed to do that if I can't even take a step without ripping off my suit? How could I forget about this!"
"Perhaps our timing was unwise," he chuckled, applying the lotion to her arm gently as she took care of her thighs. "At least you're not envenomed anymore."
"How would you know?" she pouted.
"You are back to your old unnecessarily aggressive self," he teased.
Her mouth opened in silent surprise. Now he was sassy?
"Well, fuck you, for starters…"
"Gladly."
She tried to look annoyed and searched for a witty comeback, but it came out as an awkward giggle. He had a smug smile as he gently rubbed his skilled fingers down her wrist. She suddenly realized she was scratching her thigh again and swore loudly.
"This isn't gonna work. I need something stronger."
Without giving him time to react, she grabbed her omnitool and called the only person able to provide help, even though it was the last one she wanted to talk to.
"Shepard, how can I help?" Mordin's voice soon chimed as Thane stared at her with concerned dark eyes.
"Rahna, are you sure about th-"
"Mordin, you got anything stronger than the ointment you gave me?" she asked bluntly, waving the consequences and Thane's questions away.
Fuck it.
"Ah. Expected. Come. Will inject you a better solution for allergy relief."
Shepard considered crossing an entire deck to get to the salarian, scratching and twitching in front of the whole crew, and decided it wasn't a good idea. The rumors were bad enough as it was.
"Hm…I'd rather not get out of my cabin in this…state, professor," she said hesitantly, as Thane rose to put clothes on, taking the hint.
"I'll be right there," Mordin answered and cut off the comm before Shepard had time to thank him.
She sighed. The bliss was definitely gone, and the goddamn itch was slowly driving her mad. Don't scratch. Don't scratch. She grunted angrily, getting up to dress as well.
"Should I go?" Thane asked.
"Nah. He already knows. Stay with me. I can only bear so much awkwardness. I need support."
"As you wish." He sat on the couch, his face expressing a complex mix of worry and amusement.
Mordin didn't take long. The doors hissed open, and he casually strode in with a small metallic box in his hands, tools ominously jingling in it as he walked.
"Thane," Mordin greeted as he sat on the bed next to Shepard and rummaged through his tools. The drell bowed his head slightly in acknowledgement and shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Shepard was observing Mordin and made a indistinct noise of disgust at the sight of the needle he took out of his box.
"Not fond of needles?" the professor smiled.
"Hm. As long as it helps. I need to be able to fight."
"Marks won't disappear for several days, but should definitely ease the itch."
Shepard hissed as the needle gently entered her arm.
"Is there any way to…avoid this reaction?" Thane asked, obviously staying blurry on purpose in fear that Mordin would start one of his infamous babbling tirades on medical specificities of human/drell intercourse.
"Skin will adapt with further contact. Don't know exactly how many encounters required to make Shepard immune, but keen to learn. Can't do anything about the envenomed state, however. Rare couple. Fascinating."
There it was. Thane had become a statue which, to Shepard, as good as shouted his unease with the whole situation. His eyes were fixed on her.
"Uh…yeah. We're not a couple," she mumbled, avoiding the drell's stare and scratching her belly.
"Apologies." The professor put away the needle and got up. "Didn't mean to pry. Will be going now. Meet you in the debrief room."
He strolled out as quickly as he'd strolled in.
The silence suddenly felt very loud.
"I should go and prepare for the mission," Thane finally said before getting up.
"You're not mad, are you?" Shepard asked, even though she usually would have avoided this kind of talk. That's what she did with Kai Leng. Thane was different.
On his way to the door, he paused. "Shepard, we made no vows to each other. We are both unbound. Given the time I have left, I'd prefer it stays that way. You did not disquiet me."
Never looking back, he disappeared through the door.
The Normandy was far enough out to escape detection, stationary and strangely silent, hovering in the void and observing Cronos Station. Anadius' enormous sun shone brightly through any window able to catch its light. The whole Azure team was gathered in the debrief room, and the tension in the air was intoxicating.
"The Normandy is close enough for EDI to hack and download the station's layout, so we're not blind, which is nice," Shepard began without any introduction. "No need to tell you that this mission will be dangerous. You kill or you die. We're all going in, we just need to figure out how we're gonna play this. I've got a plan."
She paused, but no one spoke up. They all knew how sensitive the mission was. Cronos Station's layout glowed a bright orange above the large table in the center of the room, all of them studying it.
"We'll need two teams. The first one, acting as a distraction, will disembark the shuttle here." She pointed to one of the two docking bays the station possessed. "The other, a strike team, starts from there." She indicated the second, smaller docking bay in the rear of the station. "We'll need to avoid detection as long as we can and kill anything that gets in our way to the Illusive Man and…to my brother. Luckily, the station is compartmented in small closed areas. With a hacker in each team, we should have no problem setting up feedback loops to avoid tripping visual alarms and move on from compartment to compartment without too much trouble. They'll know we're here, but they won't know where, or which team. So obviously, bring a shitload of flashbangs, plenty of ammo, and I want Tali and Kasumi ready to fry the entire station's omnitools. I want them blind, I want them crippled. Any questions?"
Joker's voice echoed in the room through the speaker. "Can I name the teams?"
Shepard chuckled under her breath. For once, Joker's cheerfulness was welcome. It eased the tension a bit.
"No. Anything else?"
The audience remained silent. Tali and Kasumi were both leaning above the table to memorize the blueprints, and Mordin seemed deep in thought.
"Good. Now. Distraction team: Garrus, Mordin, Tali. Strike team: Kasumi, Thane and myself. No need to say that stealth is the word here."
"Actually, I have a question, Shepard, and you're not gonna like it. If things get tough and we can only choose one end, kill Harper or save your brother. Do we all agree that killing the head of the Network is the priority?" Garrus spoke up, his dual voice gentle and careful.
Oh, she knew this moment would come. They were all Azure, as she was, even if she didn't feel like she was anything at all. The concern was legitimate, but the word priority woke the anger and worry she had been trying to tame.
"I…" she tried, doing her best to keep her voice steady while Eris screamed in her mind to be unsheathed. Garrus was her ally, she needed to calm down. He was simply being honest.
"If shit hits the fan, you guys go back to the ship when Harper's dead. I'm not leaving without my brother. Don't look back, I wouldn't. Both objectives will be reached one way or another. You can go back to licking Aria's boots, or in your case, Garrus, scratch the Network from your list of stupid grudges, but Azure Edge is definitely not my priority."
There was a long silence. Garrus' mandibles flicked and Tali suddenly seemed very interested in downloading the plans on her omnitool. The other remained still and watched.
"Fair enough, your call," the turian backed off, hands in the air, noticing how close to the edge he had been.
"Go gear up and meet me in the shuttle bay," Shepard ordered before leaving the room without looking back.
She could feel the drell shadowing her steps as she headed for the elevator.
"Need something, Thane?" she drawled. All she needed now was some alone time to try and put some order in her conflicted mind. She didn't want to be mean to him, but as he had so wisely observed before, her default self was indeed, unnecessarily aggressive. She didn't turn around to face him, but he made her. Grabbing her arm gently yet firmly, he spun her around. His soothing croon was back, echoing from his chest, and his gaze was…indescribable.
"I won't leave you behind. I'll come with you, should you have to finish this alone." His dual tone was tinged with concern.
Oh, this stupid lizard.
"I don't need you. I'm not accepting suicide applications for this mission, Krios. Back off," she dismissed harshly. It came out much more rude than she meant, and all the concern and care she wanted to express disappeared behind her meaningless insulting undertone. Maybe he'd still catch it. He was good at that. They might not be a 'couple', but no one had ever come closer to deciphering her than he did. And if his sad small smile was any indication, he'd caught it.
"Shepard. The mere fact that you mention suicide proves that in this particular scenario, you don't plan on surviving. The two of us could manage to get out alive, and with your brother. And if we don't, well...".
His grip on her arm had loosened, but his hand lingered. She didn't let him finish. He really was suicidal. At least as much as she was.
"Why would you do this? Why would you go to such an extent for me? I'm no one, Thane. Don't waste the time you have left on me. You don't owe me anything."
"My life is mine to spend as I choose. And I choose to spend it for you, Rahna."
He let his hand down to catch hers, his eyes suddenly way too intense. She avoided his gaze and jerked her hand away. It was too much. She'd never been in this kind of situation before and as much as she tried to push him away, his words made their way to her cold heart. She folded her arms on her chest, examining the floor with a tad too much interest. She had no idea how to feel about this.
"Hey, uh…Don't get all mushy on me. I can't deal with this kind of stuff," she muttered, trying to hide her confusion.
"Let me accompany you."
"No."
"Shepard."
"Okay."
He smiled. Motherfucker.
"I hate you," she growled.
"Understandable."
Author's note: Thanks to Askeebe (Moments in between, Never let me go etc.) for English proof and beta reading.
Come chat with me on tumblr if you have questions : labucheronne