Chapter 21: Profound
Troy parked his pick-up truck in the lot of the park. Shifting the gear and turning the key out of the ignition, he turned to Ryan. The temperature had dropped. The seasons were turning and a jacket was now required to abstain immunity against the evening chill.
The blond sported one of his beloved's vinyl EHS windbreakers. Troy wore a thin sweat jacket.
"Are you going to be warm enough?" The athlete prompted.
Flattered at the concern, Ryan replied, his eyelashes fluttering ever-so-slightly, "If worse comes to worse, you can always keep me warm."
Troy smirked at the suggestive undertone, then in chivalrous fashion, let himself out of the car and making his way around the front of the vehicle, held the door open for Ryan. As the smaller boy climbed out, an object that had been lodged beneath the passenger seat came loose with the intention of tripping him. Although it failed to knock him off balance, he did stumble right into Troy's arms. "You all right?" the taller boy asked.
Ryan stared directly into his eyes, moonlight shimmering on the surface of his orbs. "Yes." His voice was hearty in spite of the muscle pounding in his chest.
Troy's heart had skipped a beat as well and he was torn between cursing his hand-me-down relic from an age long passed and thanking it.
- Don't Let Me Drown-
"I never learned how to skip rocks," Ryan relayed. 'My dad and I were never exactly close enough to partake in any boyhood rites of passage."
Mild irritation passed over Troy's face.
To any outsider, Ryan had always supposed his family was picture perfect. Then Troy came along and suddenly his eyes were opened to just how dysfunctional and screwed up his family dynamic truly was. He had re-earned his mother's unconditional love in full, but his father and sister found it much easier to live their lives in denial of his existence. And it's only because of Troy that mom's back in my life. I owe him everything.
"I can teach you," Troy said, confidently breaking into his love's thoughts.
Ryan looked on as the virile boy lowered his gaze to the ground and began scanning for a smooth stone. His heart leapt as the brunette's eyes lit up and he knelt down to scoop the stone up.
"This," Troy held up his rock, gesturing to it as if he were advertising it on an infomercial, "is the perfect rock-skipping specimen."
Ryan's lips curled upward in amusement. "Smooth, right?"
"Perfectly smooth," the brunette embellished. "Feel for yourself."
Reaching out, the blond ran a pale, slender hand over the surface of the rock. Not a jagged edge, not a crack, not a pore was to be found. "It is smooth," he marveled.
"Now if you'll take a step back," Troy directed, his inflection still imitating the energetic ones of TV sales people, "I'll show you the proper technique or rock-skipping." He stepped back into the stance of a pitcher. Leaning forward, with a gentle underhand toss, he propelled the rock across the shimmering lake surface, glowing with pride each time it slapped the water and evaded submersion.
Ryan stared in awe as the rock finally sunk halfway out, a smile playing across his luscious pink lips as he took in Troy's gleeful expression. "You're amazing. I'll never be able to do that."
"Oh yes you will." Kneeling, Troy picked up a second smooth stone. "I said I'd teach you and damn skippy I will." He handed the rock to his lover and then strode behind him. "You've got a killer pitching arm, right?"
Ryan let out a modest laugh. "I guess."
"Then this will be nothing for you! It'll be a cakewalk." Troy sidled in close and with gentle but firm touches, guided Ryan's arm backwards.
"I'm not going to be able to do this," the performer fretted.
"Don't doubt yourself," Troy ordered. "You can do this and you will, Ryan. Bet on it."
Encouraged by his love's certainty and faith, Ryan readied himself and swung his arm forward in a powerful but restricted movement, letting the rock fly free. I can do it and I will! The stone skimmed over the surface, leniently slapping the water as Troy's had done. After traveling nearly the equivalent distance of its predecessor, Ryan's rock broke the surface and plunged into the icy lake.
His chest swelling with pride, the petite actor looked to his virile brunette companion. "I did it!" He rejoiced.
"I told you, you could!" Troy grinned, pulling his Ryan into an embrace. "You've gotta have more faith in yourself. You're a beautiful, amazing person." He snuggled into the crook of the blond's neck.
"Only because of you," Ryan whispered, reveling in his lover's strength and tender warmth.
"I've got nothing to do with it," Troy denied. He pulled out of the embrace and held the smaller boy out at arm's length so he could gaze upon him. "You were the one with all the bravery and strength when we were being ridiculed in front of everyone. You were the one that told them off. Not me." The lumination of his eyes emphasized his words.
"I just did what I had to do. I'm not brave. I'm just tired of people hating people like us."
"Ryan." Troy's grip on the blond's delicate hands tightened. He was serious. "You're one of the bravest people I know. Most people couldn't live through the things you do. They couldn't deal with it. But you're still here. You've survived, and everyday you're getting stronger."
Ryan stared and he knew somewhere within that those eyes would never lie to him. He knew somewhere within that Troy was right and a part of him wanted to believe him. Another part of him wanted to reject this knowledge for somewhere at the back of his mind, an insidious thought had begun to take form and it lurked there even now. He was scared senseless that this arrangement, this partnership, this relationship with Troy was only temporary. That as soon as he was himself once more, the brunette would leave him. Abandon him.
And he knew that he wouldn't be able to live without Troy. Without seeing him, touching him, feeling him everyday, he knew that he would be incomplete. That he wouldn't be to function. To live.
And he knew that it was selfish, and he hated himself for feeling this way.
Troy has his own life. I can't keep selfishly clinging to him and keeping him from living. I'm holding him back. At last, he spoke, forcing his voice to sound full and certain, to have conviction even though he was weak, empty and doubtful of his own survival skills without the basketball god beside him. "Troy… if you want to leave me when I'm a person again and no longer a fractured and hollow shell, I'll understand. It'll be healthy for you."
Troy met his words with a look of utter bewilderment. "What are you talking about? Ryan, I told you before, I'm not going anywhere. Abandoning you isn't even an option. You're everything to me. Yeah, I know that everyone says that, but it's true." Drawing the petite male in, he stared steadily into his eyes. "I don't give a shit what other people think. You are the best thing that's ever happened to me."
"Troy…" Ryan's heart swelled with so many emotions; bliss, exhilaration, trepidation, anxiety, adulation, love. His breath had been taken from him and he had no inclination to reclaim it. His head spun with the thickness. "Don't be my hero. I'll never forgive myself if you get hurt." The ground lurched beneath his feet, but as Ryan had come to count on, Troy somehow harnessed the ability to counter forces of nature.
His finger curled underneath Ryan's chin. "I won't get hurt." They both knew it was an illogical promise to make for life was both unfair and unpredictable and therefore the chances of such a promise being kept were slim next to nothing.
Under the light of the moon in each other's presence, their shimmering reflections mirroring the enamored states they gave each other, the two lovers felt invincible. They felt that they could take on the cosmos and emerge victorious.
Ryan's hand tangled itself in the locks of silky brown on the nape of Troy's neck. Troy's hands slid down to clench Ryan's thin and sturdy pelvis, tugging somewhat at the denim fabric that covered it. They kissed softly, their lips crashing together harmoniously.
The blond broke off and stared into his love's eyes. "I love you Troy Bolton." His voice lilted softly as he rested his forehead against the taller boy's.
"I love you too, Ryan Evans." Troy's side swept bangs tickled as they brushed against Ryan's forehead.
They held tight to one another rocking gently to a melody all their own as their scents intermingled.
As Ryan put his head contentedly to Troy's broad chest, he could detect vibrations and then Troy's voice rang out, resonating crisply on the peaceful night air.
You're with me now
Everything's all right
Hold on to me baby,
Hold on tight
'Cause I'm here
To keep you safe in the night
And even when you wake-
He moved back to allow the other boy to see the honesty in his gaze.
I'll still be here
I'm not a dream
I won't disappear
"I'm real," he whispered, pulling the blond back into the embrace.
And I'll let the nightmares know
You've nothing to fear As the athlete sang against his boyfriend's ear, the blond suddenly perked up, infected by his lover's contagious smile.
I can't stop my body
From movin' he sang
Not sure what to do
But to keep dancin' dancin'
To the rhythm of you
They raised their voices, joining them in prime unison, permitting them to swell exuberantly just as their concupiscence for each other did.
And we won't stop dancin'
Like the sea that flows on and on
Forever unobstructed
Troy twirled Ryan and their voices diverged, tenor-baritone harmonizing with alto-tenor:
By life's course
And let the people stop and stare
No force, no power anywhere
Can make me regret
Taking a chance
Gravity can't reach me
I'm up so high
That sense can't breach me
I'm losing my grip on reality
Baby I can feel the music
When we dance
Their bodies matched each other in rhythmic, fluid motions and under the moonlight, they became one, dancing out a deft and a beautiful routine that although un-choreographed, would be the envy of any performing pair.
As long as they had each other, they could conquer anything.
A/N: Next Chapter: The perspectives of our female antagonists are brought to light and Troy and Ryan get intimate in another odd place. Let me know what you thought of the reprise of "I Can Feel The Music When We Dance".