Chapter 21:

"I just dropped her off at school," Ashley spoke on her cell, as she drove home.

"Isn't it like ten?" Trish asked.

"Yeah, we got in late last night." Ashley laughed to herself.

"It turns out married life for five years has settled me down. I was in bed at eleven," Trish joked.

Ashley turned into the driveway and stopped the car. "I wish. We got home at like three and I was completely trashed. Matt had to get up early for a flight and then Izzy was dropped off at six o'clock and had to be at school by eight thirty. I am both hung over and freakishly tired." She was exhausted.

Trish laughed at her friend's description. "So how are things on the home front?"

"Izzy's great," she replied.

"And everything else?" Trish continued.

"Good I guess." She held back her response.

Trish sensed the apprehension in her tone, "You guess?"

"It's nothing," Ashley added.

"It's not nothing obviously Ash."

"It's not something I can talk to you about…it's a conflict of interest." Ashley tried to divert the direction of the conversation: she failed.

"It's about Matt?" Trish questioned.

"And…"

Trish finished, "Amy."

"I can't talk to you about this," Ashley said with a concerned tone.

"Why? Because Amy's an old friend?"

She concurred, "Exactly."

Trish responded. "Ash, you were both at my wedding and you are both my friends. Thus, I am a neutral source of knowledge. Just tell me."

Ashley was nervous, "Are you sure?"

"Yes."

She took a breath. "I was kind of trashed last night, okay; I was really trashed last night. But I saw Matt walk Amy outside the bar last night…and there was a moment."

"What do you mean?" Trish enquired.

"I don't know…there was just something there. I can't explain it."

Trish tried to reassure her friend, "They're old friends Ash. I'm sure it they were just talking."

"It's just that, they're close. And I've no problem with it. My best friends in the world are guys. I've nothing against cross gender friendships…okay, that came out the wrong way. I mean, it goes both ways. I have guys in my life, and he's cool with that, the feeling is mutual and it's never been an issue in the past. But…"

"…You didn't date any of them for six years?"

"Exactly," Ashley answered.

"I don't know what to say," Trish said, confused and worried.

Ashley nodded to herself, "Um…say whatever. I don't have questions."

"Alright…honestly? They had a pretty intense relationship when they were together. I'll give them that. And they've been through a lot…Amy's neck was this major obstacle that they somehow got through, unscathed. Their relationship got stronger from it – and then there was Adam. But that doesn't mean that anything is happening between them. I mean, with Sam and everything, I'm sure they're just trying to work through the weird."

Ashley opened the door of the house and walked in, "I know."

"And Matt would never do that to you. He's not that guy."

Ashley agreed, "I know. He never would…intentionally I mean. But I can just see the way he looks at her, and the way he talks about her."

"How do you mean?"

"When I asked him how they met a couple of months ago, there was this look on his face. His eyes lit up. And they laugh together constantly and they get into these ridiculous disputes over everything." She recalled their conversation in the car, months earlier on Amy's birthday.

Trish did not know what to say.

"Were they happy?" Ashley asked.

Trish paused for a moment, trying to select her words carefully. "When Amy and Matt were together, it was always difficult to tell what was going on between them…happy or not. They were just engrossed with each other. But Matt always treated her like one of the boys in the locker room; she was never treated like a girlfriend. You'd never see her on his lap making out with him while eating lunch. It wasn't like that. At the same time, they were never settled. When they fought, they fought. They are both so stubborn, and because of that, they spent a lot of the time butting heads because they are so similar. They loved each other…but that was a long time ago. Before you, and before Isabelle."

Ashley swallowed. "He still loves her," she asserted in a low voice.

"He loves you,' Trish said. 'If he didn't love you, he wouldn't be invested in making your relationship work."

"That's not true,' Ashley corrected. 'He's trying to make us work because he loves his daughter."

"I've known Matt for over a decade now. He's not the kind of guy to hang around if a relationship isn't working, or if he isn't ready to invest himself in it one hundred percent."

"It's been six years…but it's not working anymore. I don't know, I love him, but I can't settle for second place. I'm not ready to spend my life being his succeeding choice. I deserve more than that." She closed the door behind her as she entered into the house.

"Just don't underestimate him yet Ash," Trish added.