Hi everyone! So it's new chapter time. I don't think this is one of my best, but hopefully it's still enjoyable. Also, Christmastimes played havoc with my writing schedule once again, but now that that's coming to a close (except for New Years) I should (hopefully) get back on track.

As always, thanks for reading!

Report Begins:

I have not been, as I had previously believed, destroyed. However, I was forced into sleep mode for 2.52 hours, according to my internal clock. Upon regaining control, I found myself to be constrained by metal chains, and attempts to break them resulted in failure. Observing my surroundings, I found myself to be in a dark room, whose walls were dark stone, with symbols carved into them. I detected a few voices coming from the darkness.

"-a thing called a robot, apparently," one I recognized as Reimu was saying.

"Well yeah, don't you remember, uh," a second voice said, before pausing. "Y'know, whatsername."

"No," Reimu said.

"Hold on, hold on, it's on the tip of my tongue," the other voice was saying. "Ruuto? Kotoro? Hmm…"

"Well, in any case, this one is from the outsi-" Reimu said, before the other voice cut in.

"Ruukoto!" the voice said, along with a noise like a snapping of fingers. "That was her name!"

"That was whose name?" Reimu said, a touch of irritation in her voice.

"The robot you used to have around here! She cleaned the shrine for you or something," the voice replied.

For a moment, there was silence. Then Reimu sighed. "Yukari, are you feeling ok? I know that fixing the border can take a lot out of you, but I didn't think it could make you loopy enough to hallucinate false memories."

"What? Reimu, I'm not that tired! Besides, this completely happened. I mean, she ran on nuclear power and swept the shrine grounds a lot, it was right before I changed the time- oh. Oh, that's why," the voice apparently belonging to Yukari said.

"That's why what?" Reimu said, suspiciously.

"Uh, nothing, I must have imagined it. So, robot, huh?" Yukari said.

There was another pause. "Mmhm," Reimu said. "I think I'd remember someone that actually helped out around here." She sighed. "Anyway, this one apparently comes from outside the border."

A face entered my field of view. It was that of a woman with long blond hair, who seemed to be suffering from fatigue, her eyes bloodshot and barely staying open, and her hair tangled and fraying. She wore a purple dress, and was carrying a parasol lightly in her right hand. "You're from the outside, are you?"

"Define outside," I replied.

The woman, who I presumed was Yukari, smiled, which, combined with her sleep-deprived state, made her look somewhat deranged. "I mean from outside Gensokyou."

"As I told the girl earlier, I do not know what Gensokyou is," I replied.

Her smile grew even wider. "Then I have a question for you," she said, placing a hand on my chin. "It wasn't you or your creator who broke a hole in my barrier, was it?" she said, squeezing with more force than I thought possible.

"I do not have that capability," I said, barely able to open my mouth to trigger activation of my speakers. "The one who made a hole was Mer-" I began, before a hand clamped itself over my mouth, which, as you designed, stopped my speakers from working.

"I've asked. It doesn't know," Reimu said, still holding her hand over my mouth.

"Oh, really?" Yukari said, letting go of my head. "Damn it." She began rubbing her eyes. "When I find out who broke my barrier, I'm going to…to… I'm too tired to even come up with a threat," she said, slumping her shoulders.

"You should probably go get some sleep Yukari. Sorry for bringing you out here, but I thought you might want an update on investigation progress," Reimu said.

"Ugh," Yukari said, kneading her forehead with her hands. "I guess you're right, Reimu. But please keep me updated if you learn anything else, ok?" she said, creating a strange gap through which I could detect multiple large eye-like structures. "You can get Ran to wake me up, she knows a good way to do it. Oh, which reminds me," Yukari said, looking at Reimu with a confused expression, "Ran said something about you saying you weren't going to help investigate?"

"Ah, that," Reimu said, looking downward. "To be honest, I was starting to get annoyed at being relied on to fix anything that happens around here. But I changed my mind when this guy," she said tilting her head in my direction, "attacked me."

"Ah," Yukari said looking at Reimu tiredly. "Sorry for relying on you so much, I suppose, but it's really in Gensokyou's best interests, and you're the best option for the job."

"I know, I know," Reimu said, waving her hand. "It was just getting annoying. But I'm good now, don't worry about it."

"Ok. Thanks Reimu, really. Now I'm going to go home and get some sleep. Damn unscheduled barrier breaches," Yukari mumbled, before entering the gap, after which both she and the gap disappeared into thin air.

Reimu took her hand away from my face. "You did not ask me if I opened the hole," I said.

Reimu raised an eyebrow. "No. No I didn't."

"You told that Yukari that you did," I replied, confused.

"Yes I did," she replied, checking on the chains that bound me.

"Why?" I asked.

"I was lying to her to…protect an investment, let's say," she said. "I would like the people who did blow a hole in the barrier to remain…intact."

"I don't understand. What is lying?"

Reimu looked surprised. "Really? You don't even know what lying is?" I shook my head. "Lying is saying something that is false intentionally, usually for some purpose, though not always."

"What is an example of a lie?" I asked.

"Besides the one I just said?" Reimu asked. I nodded. "There's tons, really. For instance: You don't look like someone put a bunch of scrap metal together and called it finished. Or 'I will definitely free you from those chains.' Understand?"

Looking back through my memory banks, I recalled the countless hours we had spent trying to destroy that Mann Co. facility in the desert. The one that was "Definitely not a trap for robots."

"That is lying?" I said, attempting to process the new information. Reimu nodded. "What is its purpose?"

"Depends. But really, you're not in the position to be asking questions," Reimu said, pointing to the chains that bound me.

"I was unaware position determined whether it was time to ask questions," I replied.

"No, but it does affect how likely any question is to be answered," she replied. "In any case, I'm going to keep you here until Yukari has rested up and can send you back."

"You will not simply destroy me?" I said, thinking of the results of our many assaults on Mann Co. headquarters.

She frowned. "I could, if you wanted," she said. "But it is not my policy to kill those who attack me. There would be far too few people left in Gensokyou if I did." She looked at the ground. "But do you want me to destroy you? I'll admit it would save Yukari a lot of work."

I realized that despite its impossibility, the mention of my destruction caused me to have unbidden thoughts of what it would be like-my chassis crumpling, the self-destruct device triggering, my body and thoughts ceasing to exist, the money that powered me falling to the ground before it too burned away. I realized that those thoughts filled me with a sense of falsity, of incorrectness, as if to allow myself to be destroyed was as incorrect as saying 0000 equals 0001.

"I do not," I said. "I do not wish to be erased."

She smiled. "Good. Now, since Yukari can sleep like a hibernating bear, you might be here a while. Is there anything I can give you for the wait?"

"I do not require anything. Though I would appreciate being able to move and observe more," I replied.

"I'm sure you would, but considering you attacked me, I'm not thrilled about that prospect," she replied. "However, I do wonder why you didn't manage to kill me. I'm not naïve enough to believe I turned around just in time to stop you."

"I do not know. There was an error in my programming, which caused motor function in that arm to lock up. There have been many of those since I stepped through that hole," I replied.

"'Error in your programming,'" she repeated, tilting her head. "What does that mean?"

"It is an unexpected event. My programming is what causes me to seem alive, is what determines how I move and think. It is as if something has changed what I am," I replied.

"Well, since that probably saved my life, I can't say I'm very broken up about it," she said. "Would your 'programming' cause you to attack me again if I unchained you?"

"If I were error free I would certainly attempt to. As I am now, however, I am unsure. I would give an approximately 56% chance of my not outright attacking you, though that does not include manipulation of the environment or attempting to escape via means other than overpowering you," I replied.

She looked a bit skeptical. "That's a bit too high a percentage for me to risk it," she said.

I decided to attempt to 'lie,' as I considered the possibility of her letting me go to be too low as it stood. "Did I say 56%? I meant an 88% chance."

She smirked. "Nice first attempt, but you need to work on your tells," she said. "You clenched the hand you held your knife in," she said, and I realized that the fingers of my right hand had folded into a fist without my knowledge. Another case of motion signals being interrupted before they reached my conscious knowledge. "Also, that was too large a jump in percentage," she said. "There's no way you made that large a mistake in calculating."

"I still have much to learn about lying," I replied.

"It's a useful skill," she replied. "When dealing with immensely powerful beings." She looked at me uncomfortably before lowering her shoulders and exhaling loudly. "Look, I'll make a deal with you. Honestly, you don't seem that dangerous, and I'd really like to save these chains for more difficult party crashers, so if you'll let me bind your hands together, then I'll let you walk around. Good?"

"Now there is only a 24% chance of direct assault," I replied.

Shaking her head, Reimu unchained my arms, and, taking a rope, tied my arms together, placing a seal on it afterwards. Attempts to break the rope failed, despite the rope appearing frayed and thin. Attempting to cloak revealed that the rope would not be rendered invisible, disrupting the cloaking field to the point of uselessness.

"That seal can only be removed by me," Reimu said. "So if you ever want to have control over your arms again, you'll have to keep me alive."

"Very well," I replied, bowing my head to indicate agreement. She smiled.

"Great. Well, let's get back up to the shrine then. You interrupted some important negotiations. Hopefully they didn't change their minds because of this," she said, turning around and walking into the dark hallway behind her. I followed.

Although this was also underground, it did not appear to be the same as the cave I had first arrived in. The stone was rougher, unsmoothed. It was either made by amateur stonemasons or was a natural formation. I calculated a roughly 60% chance of the cave being natural. Noticing my interest, Reimu turned to me. "If you're looking for a way of escape, don't bother. These cave is very old, and the stone's essentially unbreakable." Looking closer, I realized the stone in the cave was a dark black color, and sparkled blue, reflecting the light from my eyes. "My family started creating caves like this a long time ago, to house troublesome youkai. This one was the only naturally formed one though," she said. "Way back when, almost all of them were occupied, but nowadays hardly any of them are still in use."

"Youkai? They went extinct, according to my information." I replied. "The great disbelieving of 1886 caused them all to fade away. It was a classified operation, but my creator has access to such files."

Reimu stopped, causing me to nearly bump into her. "I see," she said softly. "I suppose that was to be expected. Humans and youkai never could get along out there. Still, it's a shame to hear that they're all just gone." She shook her head, frowning.

I found my hands, still bound together, reaching out towards her without any conscious effort, but as they reached her, she whirled around and swatted them out of the way. "24% chance of assault, huh? Guess I got the unlucky quarter."

"That was not an assault," I said.

"Really? What was it then?" she said, raising an eyebrow.

"I am unsure. The error in my programming caused my arms to move without my knowledge," I replied. "I am beginning to think I have been rendered permanently defective." Upon saying this, I found my cooling system inexplicably sped up, chilling my body to below optimal temperatures, but it returned to normal operations a second later.

Her expression remained suspicious, until she sighed. "You're not a good enough liar to be faking that. But if you can't even control your own actions," she said, before pausing. "Well, then I really hope I'm not making a mistake with this," she said. "But keep in mind, you're not getting those ropes off without me. Maybe I should bind your legs, too…" she said, before shaking her head, "But then I'd have to carry you, and that'd take too much effort without Yukari. C'mon then," she said, and continued to walk, and I followed after her.

Eventually, after climbing 143 stairs, we reached a wall. As I was trying to determine why I had been led to a dead end, she simply walked continued walking and disappeared into the wall. I ensured that there were no errors in my sensor data, and determined that the wall was certainly solid, but she had somehow stepped right through it. I cautiously began to reach my hands towards the wall, when her head came back through the wall. "Are you coming?" she said, reaching out a hand that also appeared from the wall.

"That is a solid wall," I said. "I cannot go through solid matter like you seem to be able to."

She sighed. "Right, forgot about that. It's not actually solid," she said, moving her hand in and out of the wall. "See?"

"But all sensor data indicates it is solid matter," I said. "I cannot walk into solid matter, my pathfinding prohibits it."

She raised an eyebrow, "My word means nothing to you?"

"Data from sensors is of higher order than all but the word of the master," I replied. Though as I said it, I realized that due to the error, the priority structure could be changed. Internal queries found that self-preservation, previously of lower priority than killing the targets listed as enemies, had somehow increased to the highest priority, beyond even direct orders.

Reimu took the decision out of my hands by simply grabbing my bound wrists and pulling me forward, and I was dragged into the wall. Despite my sensors readings, the wall was indeed somehow not solid, though throughout the time I spent passing through it, the readings didn't change, causing my body to lock up as per collision protocol. After a second, however, I found myself in the forest surrounding the shrine, and I could move again.

"See?" Reimu said. "easy enough to get through. Now let's go back to the shrine. I'm sure there's something you could help out with." She began walking towards the shrine, which was barely visible in the distance.

I decided to take this opportunity to send you this report. Master, I am sorry to break protocol like this, but I must advise you to be cautious if you decide to bring my fellow units here. It is likely that whatever is causing these errors within me may occur in them too, causing erratic behavior.

Report Ends

In his lab, Grey Mann read over the reports of his wayward robot with a mounting sense of exhilaration. If what the report said was true, and the RED team were truly stuck where they were, then the Mann. Co facilities were undefended, though, because of that blasted machine created by that Engineer and Medic, whose workings he was unsure about, he couldn't be positive. In the meantime, the mention of Australium by Merasmus and the recent information about the continued existence of youkai in this mysterious realm they'd been transported to captured his attention. He was always on the lookout for more Australium, as the machine that helped keep him alive required it, but the mention of youkai had more intriguing possibilities. He had heard of them, of course, of the power they once wielded in the east. If he could somehow either enslave or ally with them, he would have an almost unstoppable army. Even better, if he could manage to extract the secrets of their powers from them, he would be able to infuse his robots with them, and be assured of their complete loyalty as well. He might even be able to rid himself of the blasted longevity machine, as he'd heard youkai were essentially unaging anyway, so if he infused himself with their essence, he would become unaging as well.

He turned to an engineer bot that happened to be nearby. "You."

"Yes, creator?" the robot said, saluting.

"Find me a," he shuddered, before finishing his sentence, "wizard." It galled him to have to use something so unexplainable as magic, but he supposed it had to be done.

As the robot saluted again and ran off on its mission, Grey tried to ignore the small amount of worry that was niggling at his mind. That error the robot was experiencing seemed dangerous. He would have to try and ensure it didn't happen to any of the other ones, or he might have a problem.