It isn't that difficult. Her words haunted him for the coming weeks and he had no idea what to do about them. What was it that he was supposed to figure out? What did she want him to do? He had attempted to apologise multiple times, handing her a locket which he had discovered, buying her a horse of her own and then showering her with more books than she could read.
But still she refused to let him anywhere near her. It drove him made most of the time. He spent most of his days with her in his mind, ignoring whatever command the Sheriff gave him with regards to Hood. Gisborne went about his own way to catch the outlaw, using any method possible, but never getting anywhere. It was driving him mad.
"Lady Marian," Gisborne spoke as soon as he saw her leave Nottingham Castle. He had been stood by the gallows, watching as they were prepared for another evening of entertainment.
Marian turned around as she neared the gates, curtseying slightly in front of him. She had said nothing to him since she had seen what he had done to Elizabeth. She chose to keep silent on the matter, knowing it was not her place to question what had happened. She still did not think she could hold her tongue if Guy raised the issue.
"Sir Guy," she responded. "I was just on my way to Locksley Manor to visit Elizabeth. How does she fair?"
Gisborne kept his gaze low and his hand was clasping the hilt of his sword as if he could snap it off in any given moment. "She fairs well enough I should suppose."
"Good," Marian nodded. "Is there anything you particularly wanted?"
Gisborne sighed and looked at her again. Was he really going to ask Marian what was running through Elizabeth's mind? Was he that desperate to ask her? He suspected he was.
"Elizabeth has not been herself for a couple of weeks," Gisborne drawled out, his voice low. "I have attempted to speak with her, yet she refuses to converse with me."
Marian resisted the urge to scoff at what she had just heard from him. Was he that naive to think he could speak to her and the issue would be resolved? Gisborne waited for a response from the Lady Marian, holding his breath as he did so.
"You hit her," Marian reminded her, "after admitting that you had left a child to die. Elizabeth holds you in high regard, Sir Guy."
Gisborne's face pulled up at hearing that. That was before Marian slapped him right back down again.
"She does not agree with what you do, but she thought that there was a chance you...well...I do not know what she hoped for, but she saw some goodness in you which you extinguished that night. You ruined her and now you need to try to set it right," Marian said, doubting Gisborne would actually be able to set anything right. She had a lack of faith in him to do the correct thing.
"I have bought her things which are above a servant's post-"
"-Bought?" Marian checked with him. "I doubt she wants gifts."
"Then what does she want?" Gisborne snarled. "I have apologised to her multiple times. I have done all that I can."
Marian shrugged her shoulders and pulled her cloak tightly around her shoulders as she did so. "Perhaps she wants you to rectify what you did wrong?"
Gisborne's brow furrowed for a moment or two. "And how do I rectify a child's attempted death? I cannot take the motion back."
"No," Marian nodded in agreement. She didn't particularly want to get into this conversation with Sir Guy. She didn't really want to hold any conversation with him, never mind one about how to win back his maid, especially when Marian suspected that winning her back would do no good for anyone, most certainly not Elizabeth.
"Anyway," Marian shook her head, "I am certain that you shall come up with something."
Gisborne held in a snort as she walked away from him, leaving him to stand and contemplate what it was he should come up with.
...
Elizabeth bid goodnight to Marian as soon as she saw Gisborne's horse enter the stables through the open kitchen window. Marian had informed her how Gisborne had done his best to try and find out what it was Elizabeth had wanted. The maid had rolled her eyes, not entirely sure what she wanted, but she hoped she would find out one day.
Marian scurried away after receiving information about some kind of armour which the Sheriff had been designing. It was, apparently, impossible to break.
"Elizabeth," Gisborne's voice spoke as soon as he entered the kitchen, "has the Lady Marian visited you today?"
"She left moments ago," was all the response which Gisborne received as his maid pottered about the kitchen, wishing that Sarah had not left her early for her son had been taken ill. She tidied bowls away whilst Gisborne moved to stand behind her.
She kept still as she pretended not to notice his hand cup her hip. She could not deny that her pulse raced and her breathing faltered as his thumb roamed over the cotton dress she wore.
"I sent a letter this afternoon," Gisborne informed his maid and she turned around, pushing his hand from her. He reacted quicker, his own hands moving around her and grasping the worktop, trapping her against it.
"Oh?" Elizabeth wondered.
"To Annie," he commented and her eyes widened.
"And what did you say?" Elizabeth wondered from him. "Did you apologise for being a heartless bastard?"
Gisborne took a deep breath and controlled his anger for a moment. He wouldn't lash out at her; not again. He refused to harm her, knowing full well that it would ruin him further. He shook his head and pulled his hands free from his gloves. He dropped his leather coat to the side of him as Elizabeth felt his chest press against hers, his breath tickling her face.
"I apologised, yes," Gisborne nodded at her. "I also sent her some money. Seth...well...he will have a good life with everything that he needs. He will not know me, nor will I know him. But the boy shall not suffer."
Elizabeth had to admit that she was gobsmacked. Never before did she think that Gisborne would do something like that. She knew that he did not care for the boy, but he was taking some form of action which showed he was responsible. He may not be in his life, but he was helping. Elizabeth doubted Annie would want his help after all he had done. It would not shock her in the slightest.
Gisborne's lip curled up into a smirk at the sight of Elizabeth so quiet. Apparently miracles did happen.
"I will not take responsibility for the child," Gisborne's gruff voice continued. "You know that I cannot do that."
"You're doing the next best thing," she whispered, her throat dry and her voice gentle. "Why?"
Gisborne took a deep breath and moved a hand to curl around her neck, his forehead resting against hers. "Because it was the only thing I could," he told her. "I did it because I knew it would appease you."
"I wouldn't say it has fully appeased me," Elizabeth informed him. "I still need-"
"-Time," Gisborne finished for her. "I suspected as much."
"But you see, don't you?" Elizabeth wondered, doing her best to make him understand. She was a fool to try and help him, but she had to do it. She wanted him to do the right thing and stop being so callous all of the time. "You see how it was wrong to leave a child to die. You have to know, Guy."
Gisborne inhaled sharply and turned away from her. Did he lie to her? Did he tell her that he still thought nothing at the prospect of the child dying? Or did he tell her that he knew that he would never care enough for the baby's life?
"Even if you do not love your son," Elizabeth spoke hastily, "even if you feel nothing for him, you do understand that leaving a child to die is not right? If you forget your feelings and concentrate on what is right and wrong then it is obvious."
Gisborne allowed her words to sink in for a moment, wondering if she spoke the truth to him or not. He looked down to the ground for a moment and slowly nodded, gulping loudly as he did so. It was only then when Elizabeth could feel her lips move upwards for a moment.
"I suppose so," Gisborne told her.
She nodded once as Gisborne moved his other hand to hold her neck too, keeping her tight against him as she refused to resist.
"I am not the one who deserves an apology from you," Elizabeth told him. "I am still angry with you about that night, and yes, I know I have no reason to be angry at you. I am a maid and you are Lord of Locksley...I understand..."
"If you think I care for one moment about your ranking then you do not know me as I think you do," Gisborne told her once she had trailed off. He shook his head back and forth, knowing full well that he would never be able to present her in Nottingham, but he did not care if she was a servant. It mattered not anymore.
"I know," Elizabeth nodded. "I just worry sometimes, but I only...you know that I care for you...despite everything I still do, but I know what you have done. I often wonder if there are two sides to you."
"And is that a bad thing?" Gisborne wondered back from her, slowly daring to lower his lips closer to hers as she nodded.
"I think so," she nodded, watching as his lips moved closer towards hers. She knew that she couldn't kiss him then and there. Not just yet. She pulled back and allowed his lips to rest against her cheek as she allowed her hands to rest on top of his on her hips, slowly pulling them from her.
"Please," Gisborne whispered, "I have not held you like this in so long, Elizabeth."
"I know," she responded back to him. Did he think that he was the only one who was suffering?
"Then at least allow me this one thing of you," he urged her and she remained hesitant. "Please."
She knew that if she spoke then she would possibly crack under the pitiful look of his gaze. She wanted to forget that night so badly. She wanted things to go back to the way they had been when he had told her of his nightmares and held her as though she was the only thing stopping them from happening. She knew it would take time for that to happen again.
She felt Gisborne lift her onto the counter, not caring that she knocked an apple onto the floor on the way. He stepped in between her legs, his hands holding her waist as his head remained against her chest and she ran her fingers through his dark locks, sighing loudly before she kissed the top of his head, knowing that there really was some form of sorrow inside of him.
...
A/N: You guys are amazing! Your reviews make me so happy! So thank you to cgluv, Guest, KatjaLillian, Shira1111, LittleDragonRider, contentiousprincess, ajdaisy and Mediatrix for reviewing the last chapter! Do let me know what you think so far!