disclaimer: see previous chapters!
this is a special valentine's day treat for you guys as a way to say sorry that i never update
hope you like
happy february 14th!
Chapter 21: Underneath the Heart
Was it weird for them to spend the night in bed together? Probably. But they didn't do anything. They didn't even take their coats off.
So when they woke up in the morning, they were still laying next to each other, their coats were still on, their hands were still clasped, and the smiles were still on their faces.
Scully woke up first.
"Mulder?" she asked, wondering why he was in her bed. She was hot. Then she remembered. And she smiled again. She had never watched him sleep before. He was always up before her. He looked like a baby, like Will, when he slept. Comfortable. Peaceful. Happy.
He must have felt her eyes on him because he opened his as well. And, just like her, his smile got bigger. Unlike her, he remembered right away.
There had been no questions. It was their first kiss, but it felt like they had been kissing forever. It was sweet and warm and careful. They could never be too careful. They had invested a lot into each other.
Scully had been the one to break it off. Not because she didn't like it, but because she couldn't believe in it at first. She had to pull back just to make sure it was really him. To make sure that they were really doing this. They were.
"Is this okay?" he asked, not wanting to make her feel uncomfortable. Kissing her had been like kissing an angel, but if he found out that she regretted it, it would kill him. It seemed to take forever for her to nod her head, but the fact was she did, and that was when they fell asleep. No questions. No worries. Just each other.
And Will.
He interrupted their small flashback.
Of course, Mulder wanted to go get him.
"Hey there Bud! Slept all night, didn't you?"
She loved the way Will giggled when Mulder talked to him like that.
"That means you've probably got a nasty diaper…" Scully trailed, and sure enough.
"I'll go make breakfast," Mulder volunteered. He didn't like diapers. He could handle them, but he didn't like them. Then again, who does?
"I was hoping we could go out for breakfast," she smiled as he took off his coat.
"Ahh, and where would m'Lady and her prince like to dine this fine morning?" he asks in a fancy voice, even though she's changing a diaper.
"Mulder," she laughs, knowing anywhere he takes her will be fine.
"Mawwdah," they hear from the changing table. At first, they look at each other to see if what they heard was correct. Then they looked down at Will, happy to be sitting with his bare butt in the air and being looked at.
"What was that, Will?" Scully asked him, afraid what she just heard was a dream.
Will didn't say anything. She remembered when he said her name for the first time.
"Willy, who's this?" she asked, pointing to Mulder with her free hand. Still, nothing.
"Come on, Will. Mul-der," Mulder whispered, hoping to encourage him. It did.
"Mawwdah," Will said again, putting his fingers in his mouth.
Scully's hands were shaking so badly that she was hardly able to put a fresh diaper on him. When it was finally fastened, though, she picked up her baby boy and spun him in the air. In a way, she was happier for Mulder than she had been for herself. It did give her a sense of relief, though, which she couldn't deny that she was relishing in. Everything was falling into place. A year ago, she had been just a disheveled soon-to-be mother. Now, she was newly 19, going to college, had an amazing guy and an equally amazing son that would now have a father-figure. She was pleased that her baby had decided to add Mulder's name to his short and ever-lasting list of words that were important enough to be designated as "first."
"Willy," Mulder said, taking the boy in his arms. Scully didn't realize it at first, but he was crying. He was crying tears of joy for her son, who had just said his name. That made her heart melt.
"Mulder," she said, putting her hand on his shoulder while he kissed William's head. They were sweet kisses, even though Will didn't entirely understand why he was getting them.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, desperately trying to hide his emotions. One look from her, though, and he let them flow freely.
"I haven't felt like this in a long time," he confessed.
"Felt like what?"
"I don't know. Happy. Truly happy. Loved through and through. I haven't felt that way in a long time. Probably not since Sam was taken."
"I'm sorry," Scully said because that's all she could think to say. Mulder shifted Will and threw his other arm around her, kissing her forehead and her cheek in the process.
"You don't have anything to be sorry about," he said between kisses.
"If it makes you feel any better, I haven't felt this way in awhile either. Not as long as you, but it's just the same. I know exactly what you're talking about," she told him, tracing her finger along his tone chest. Will grabbed it. Then they stood like that for a few minutes, just soaking up everything they felt they were missing that they could only find in each other. Even Will knew that this was an important moment.
"So, last night… everything is real?" Mulder finally had to ask. He had to. It was eating him up inside.
"It's real to me," Scully said, laying her chin on his chest to meet his eyes. They were beautiful. Hazel and deep and passionate.
"Are you sure you want to get involved with me, Scully? Are you sure you want to let me contaminate your life?" he asked, half joking and half serious. He didn't understand why he was a curse to other human beings, but the fact was that he seemed to be, and he didn't think he could handle if something (mainly, him) hurt this girl. He would never be able to forgive himself.
"You are free to contaminate my life any time you want," she smiled, and they shared a deep kiss. They didn't even notice that he had to bend down and she had to stand on her toes. She would have stood on a ladder if that's what it took to kiss him.
She liked kissing him.
She found that out when she almost suffocated.
"Easy, there," he told her as she pulled away for air panting. A smile spread across Scully's face, and she no longer felt a pain for her son when she looked at him. He didn't need to know his father. He had Mulder. A few months ago, it would have scared her to be so heavily invested in somebody else, especially after Ethan. But everything had fallen into place. She felt Mulder would take care of her son and her heart.
Her heart.
Like that heart she wore around her neck.
He would protect it.
And he would protect what lay underneath it as well.