Author's Notes: Only one chapter left! Part three begins soon! Lyrics used in this chapter are from "May It Be" by Hayley Westernra, and "I Promise You" by Judith Owen. I highly suggest listening to the songs as you read.
Disclaimer: These characters are property of NBC and their own creators; as is any piece of an episode needed for the chapter. I make no money from this. Any song lyrics used are also property of their own creator.
Hereafter And Forever
Part 21: May It Be
(March 9, 2015)
A couple of hours had gone by when Will came running into the waiting room. Jack looked up with a start, having nearly fallen asleep on Grace's shoulder.
"What are you doing here? Where's Mia?" Jack asked.
"Vince is watching her, she's fine."
"God, I can't believe I talked to her like that. I'm a bad father. I don't even know why I did it. I just thought, wow, my little girl, up on stage, playing the piano and everybody clapping for her. I was so proud of her. But I didn't act proud of her, did I?"
"You want to know what I think?" Will asked.
"Not really, but I know you'll tell me anyway."
Will sighed, taking a seat next to Jack. "I think, that you got upset because you were trying to live your fantasies of being on stage through Mia."
"Will, I'm on stage. I can get work now. Usually."
"Yeah, but it took you a long time. A really long time. I mean, years."
"The point Will, find one."
"I'm just saying, that was something you had worked for your whole life. And Mia was getting it handed to her at four years old. You wanted her to love it, but maybe for the wrong reasons."
Jack groaned, "Crap! Why are you always right?" He leaned back in the seat, "I'll have to make it up to her somehow. I hope she still wants to play piano."
"How's Karen? Any word?"
"Oh my god! What time is it?" Jack looked for a clock, jumping up from his chair, "I fell asleep. Grace, did anyone come in? Have you heard anything?"
"No. No one. I've seen them running past that door all night, but no one's said a thing to me."
Jack started out the door to the nurse's station. Will and Grace knew there was no use asking him to wait, not when Karen was involved.
When Jack got to the nurse's station he looked annoyingly at the young blonde nurse who was the one who had greeted them when they came in. She was sitting non-chalantly reading a book.
"Excuse me?" Jack snapped, "Where is the doctor? I've been here for two hours, I don't know what's going on, and I haven't heard anything about my partner. I want to see her, right now."
"You can go back when the doctor says so." The nurse replied, not even looking up from her book.
"Listen Miss Thing." Jack reached over the desk and shut the book, "I am in no mood. Now you call the doctor, and tell him I want to talk to him. Now."
The nurse rolled her eyes, but did as she was told, getting on the phone and paging over the intercom.
Jack walked back into the waiting room and sat down again between his friends. He sighed as this time he leaned on Will's shoulder, saying nothing.
~~~~**~~~~
About twenty minutes later, a young doctor finally appeared at the waiting room door.
"Which one of you is here with Karen Walker?"
"We all are." Jack said, standing up, "But I'm her…"
"Significant other?"
"Yeah."
"Well, I apologize for being so long. We had to do several tests, to make sure she was okay after the ordeal. And she was very upset."
"Upset? Wait, why? What ordeal? What happened? Is she okay?"
"No one's told you anything?"
"No."
"My goodness, I'm so sorry. I thought one of the student nurses came out to tell you. Mr…?"
"McFarland. Jack McFarland."
"Mr. McFarland, you were aware that Karen getting pregnant at her age was unusual?"
"Yes."
"Not to say it doesn't happen, because it does. Women have babies at all ages. But, it is more difficult for older women. There's a higher risk of problems."
"What problems?"
The doctor sighed, "I'm sorry, but I'm afraid Karen did suffer a miscarriage. She lost the baby. It seemed the pregnancy was too much for her body to handle."
"But she's….she's…" Jack grabbed on to the door frame, the shock of the news making him weak in the knees. Will and Grace watched silently from inside the room, hearing bits and pieces of the conversation. Enough to know what was going on. Grace had to hold back her own tears.
"Again, I am so very sorry."
"Can I see her?"
"Of course, of course. I'll take you back right now."
The doctor motioned for him to follow. Jack quietly looked back in the room at Will and Grace, before following the doctor down the hallway.
~~~~**~~~~
May it be an evening star
Shines down upon you
"Karebear?" Jack whispered quietly as he leaned around the door into her hospital room. It was dark inside. Karen was curled up with a pillow, hugging it close to her chest. She looked up when she heard his voice.
"Jackie?"
May it be when darkness falls
Your heart will be true
"Oh, Karen." Jack stepped further into the room, walking over to the bed.
"You know?"
"I know."
"I'm sorry."
"It's not your fault. "
"I wanted this for us so much."
You walk a lonely road
Oh, how far you are from home
"I know. But you don't need to be sorry."
Karen held out her hand, and Jack took it in his. He knelt down beside her bed, and leaned his head against her hand. Karen smiled as she kissed his temple, letting a tear trickle down her face and graze his skin.
"We'll be okay."
Mornie utulie
Believe and you will find your way
Mornie alantie
A promise lives within you now
"Is Mia okay?" Karen asked, her voice soft.
"She's fine. She's with Vince, at Will's apartment."
"Wilma's here?"
"He is. Grace is still here too."
"Both of them?"
"Because they care about you, Karen."
"What are we going to tell Mia?"
"We'll think of something."
"Where were you? I told them to get you hours ago."
Jack groaned, "That snot-nosed little bitch at the front counter wouldn't let me come back. You're not legally married." He said in a mocking tone. "I hate that I wasn't here with you."
"Better for you. I wouldn't want you to see me a mess."
Jack managed a small smile, brushing Karen's hair from her face, "I've seen you a mess, Kare. I've seen you in every possible light, and you are always beautiful. You will always be beautiful."
Karen chuckled, though Jack could hear tears behind the laughter, "God Jackie, I swear I don't deserve you. I'm so sorry this happened." She shut her eyes, letting the tears fall. "I wanted to have a baby with you. I wanted to know that I could love somebody like that."
May it be the shadow's call
Will fly away
May it be your journey on
To light the day
Jack stood up and sat on the edge of the bed, pulling Karen into his arms, "You do that every day. With Mia. And me. Karen, you've never disappointed me. Not even now."
When the night is overcome
You may rise to find the sun
"I love you so much."
Mornie utulie
Believe and you will find your way
Mornie alantie
A promise lives within you now
"I love you too, Jackie."
A promise lives within you now
~~~~**~~~~
The next few weeks, Karen tried to brush everything aside, as Karen always did. Never mentioning her pregnancy, or her miscarriage to anyone. Those who knew, knew. And those who didn't know, knew better than to ask.
But Jack noticed Karen's unusually quiet demeanor. She was quick to just shrug on and go along with something, not make any remarks, not try and get things her way, like she always did. This particular day Jack found her in the living room, watching a movie on TV.
"Hey Kare. What are you doing?"
"Oh, hey Poodle. Nothing. Just watching this movie."
"It's that Lifetime?"
"Yeah."
"Karen, you have to snap out of this!" Jack claimed, rushing to her side.
"What?" Karen laughed, "Jackie, what are you talking about?"
"This Karen. You. You're acting weird. You're passive, you're non-judgmental, you're watching Lifetime and it's freaking me out! I want my Karen back."
"I am your Karen silly!"
"I know you're still upset, about what happened. Even though you don't want to talk about it." Karen was quiet, and Jack continued, "You know, one of the worst parts about that whole thing was that they wouldn't let me stay with you. But there is a way we could make sure that never happens again."
Karen sighed, "Get married?"
"Exactly."
"Poodle, if we ever get married I want to it to be for the right reason. Not because you're trying to make a statement."
"But I'm not trying to make a statement. We know we're going to be together the rest of our lives anyway. Why not make it official?"
"If we already know that, why do we have to make it official?" Karen said, "Jackie, please. Let's just be like we are."
Jack pulled Karen into a long slow kiss, his lips caressing hers. Her fingers came up to touch his face, and she smiled contentedly, knowing exactly how much he loved her.
So if you feel afraid
And if your hope is gone
Just remember these things I promise you
I will move heaven
I will move hell and earth to be where you are
I will move heaven
And it may take my life
It may take forever
I promise you