Chapter 21

Mathias had decided that the best place to defeat me would be at the bonfire. We had waited a few days to have the competition. Meanwhile, the men had talked about it constantly, ensuring that everyone was eager for the competition. If they didn't actually care about the outcome, they just wanted it to be over so that they wouldn't need to hear anymore about it.

Evrett solemnly handed both Mathias and me our axes. Mathias began making a big show of stretching and warming up his muscles, but I just stood waiting. I had already warmed up, in private, as to not make a fool of myself.

Instead, I surveyed the log in front of me. It was a good size trunk, at least a foot wide.

It was long enough for us to both have enough space without being crowded. The log was raised off the ground and tied to the wooden blocks that supported it. I wouldn't have to worry about the log shifting balance.

"Are you two ready?" Evrett laid his hands on both our shoulders.

"Ready as ever." Mathias grinned wolfishly.

I nodded and Evrett stepped well away from our axes. "All ready? Get set! Now!"

As one, Mathias and me swung the axes over our shoulders and brought them down in the log with a singular resounding thud. I was out of the log before he was, because my swing hadn't driven my ax as deep as Mathias'. I had swung again by the time his ax was out of the log.

"Go, Adda!" Trom cheered me on. "C'mon!"

"Mathias, if you don't win!" Evrett threatened his friend, who determinedly ignored him.

"Addy!" Lotta's face was flushed and her eyes were bright with excitement. I could see her from the corner of my eye and I gave her a quick smile before concentrating on the competition.

The cheers, encouragements and insults ran together like the sweat that was forming on my body. I brought my ax down again and again, refraining from looking over at Mathias to see how he was doing.

I was about halfway through the log and my heart was pounding hard and steadily. I wanted to speed up, wanted to get ahead, but I held myself back. I didn't want to use the bulk of my strength before the last stretch of the competition.

The ax slipped in my hands and I tightened my grasp, frowning with concentration. My palms burned from the friction and I took a deep breath, resuming the pattern of swinging and pulling.

"That's it, Mathias! You've got her!" Evrett yelled happily.

I sharpened my focus, drawing on my reserves. I almost doubled my speed, narrowing my eyes to slits to protect them from the flying chips.

Mathias' ax broke though the log and the crowd roared. Mathias raised his ax above his head and shook it victoriously. They screamed even louder, making an incredible amount of noise for only about fifty people. I was impressed, in any case.

I buried my ax in the log and halted Mathias' victory dance to shake his hand. "Nice fell. I'm just glad I didn't place a bet."

Mathias grinned at me, wrapping his arm around my head and messing my hair. I scowled good-naturedly and pushed him away.

"It's alright." Trom shoved his way through the crowd to console me. "You were really close, Adda."

"Not close enough. You'll be watching children all week." I consoled Trom. By the way his face fell, he needed it more than me.

"I know." Trom muttered. "Still, you were very fast. You were faster than Mathias, he was just stronger. You were-"

"Stop it!" I laughed. "I'm alright. I'm sorry I couldn't win for you, but you're more upset than I am."

"Thanks, Adda." Evrett grinned cheekily as he followed the rest of the onlookers as they made their way towards the bonfire site.

The men were piling the wood onto the massive fire when I got there. The musicians were readying their drums and I even saw a flute. The children were running around underfoot, shrieking with anticipation.

"Look!" Trom nudged me and pointed.

I looked and saw two men rolling a giant keg. They strained to lift it onto a bench.

"They've got four more of those." Trom informed me. "Now that we don't have to make it in secret, the men set up a brewery."

"A brewery?" I raised my eyebrows. During my last couple days at the fief, I hadn't seen anything resembling a brewery. "Where?"

"In the east woods." Trom answered. "I help out there sometimes."

"Hmm." I caught sight of Master Salmalín and Daine. "I'll be back."

Trom nodded as I wove my way through the throng of people.

"You did very well." Master Salmalín congratulated me.

"Did you do a lot of that before..." Daine struggled to find the words that wouldn't upset me.

I saved her the effort. "We never really made a contest out of it, but our crew spent a lot of time in the forest. Rolph, he was a woodsmen. He taught me."

"Have you ever used weapons?" Master Salmalín asked.

"Just once." I answered curiously.

"We were thinking that, if you wanted, you should start weapon lessons." Daine suggested. "It's really useful and you were really good with that ax. An ax is only a step away from a weapon."

"Less than that, actually." I grinned. "We used our axes to kill the guards."

Master Salmalín cleared his throat. "Yes, well, would you be interested?"

"Yes." I shrugged. "Sounds well enough."

Master Salmalín looked pleased. "Good."

The drumming began and the dancers began to sway with the beat.

"Are all your Midsummers like this?" Master Salmalín wondered.

"Mostly." I reflected. "There does seem to be a lot more beer at this one...but probably a lot less love-making."

Master Salmalín raised his eyebrows. I didn't see fit to enlighten him.

"Addy, come on!" Lotta pulled my arm, bringing me into the circle of dancers with her. I fell into the line as it spun around the fire. My feet remembered the steps better than my head, so I let them lead me.

"Evrett's more than thrilled." Lotta told me, then had to wait until we passed each other again to finish. "But poor Trom."

"I know." I agreed. "He shouldn't have bet on me."

We needed to save our breath for the dancing, so we didn't say anything more. Instead, we threw ourselves into the dances with wild abandon. It was an old habit. Back when we were still slaves, the music and the dance helped us to forget the bad things about our life. When I was too tired to dance, I sat by the drummers and the flutist. That close to the drums, I could feel the vibrations through the core of my body and it made my heart pump faster.

I saw Daine and Lotta sitting on the grass, chatting comfortably, both of their babies lying on the quilt. I was pleased by the fact that they got along. They were two links, each from a separate part of my life, and I was glad that they fit together. It made things a little simpler.

"Here." Trom handed me a tankard. "Tired?"

"Resting." I took a small sip of beer.

Trom took a big gulp from his own mug, sighing with pleasure. "Is this anything like what you've got in Corus?"

"I wouldn't know. Judging by Master Salmalín's face when he tasted it, I'd say that this has a little more...kick." I felt the burning liquid travel down my throat. "But I don't drink much."

"So..." Trom began slowly. "Are you happy in Corus?"

I was slightly taken aback by the question. "I suppose. What do you mean?"

"Are you ever coming back?" Trom stared intently at the beer in his tankard.

"I don't know." I avoided his gaze. "Master Salmalín was talking about traveling to other countries. I could go all around the world, Trom."

"Do you want to go all around the world?"

"I don't know." I shrugged. "Maybe. I'd like to see Carthak."

"Carthak is just a place I've heard of once or twice." Trom raised his head, a strange light in his eyes. "I've never even thought I'd get the chance to go there. And you, you going to different countries and meeting important people and-"

"How much have you drunk?" I tried to make my voice light.

"Not much." Trom stared at me. "Do you remember last time you came? When we were...alone in the shack?"

"Yes." I blushed slightly, but refused to look away. "Are you saying..."

"No, I decided that I didn't want it either." Trom lowered his head shyly. "At least, not until we can be wed."

I choked on a mouthful of beer, inhaling the drops into my lungs. I coughed and spat them onto the ground. "Trom!"

Trom flushed and began to mumble. Even slightly drunk, he knew that he had blundered. "I wasn't asking you or anything, just saying what I hoped."

"Trom..." I had no idea what to say.

"Don't say anything." Trom hastily quieted me. "Just forget I said anything."

I sat next to him for another minute or two, shifting awkwardly. Finally, I stood. "I'm done resting."

I danced. When I turned back in Trom's direction, he was gone. I sighed, turning to Lotta. She was still talking to Daine. As much as I liked Daine, she didn't know Trom and wouldn't understand the situation. I waited until Daine stood wearily, picking up Sarralyn, and heading off with Master Salmalín.

I casually made my way towards Lotta, dropping onto the grass.

"What is it?" Lotta peered at me curiously.

I looked at her quizzically.

"You kept looking over here." Lotta smiled. "And you usually don't dance that badly."

Lotta did know me well. I sighed heavily, leaning towards her so that no one would overhear. "Trom sort of asked me to marry him."

"What?"

"He did." I nodded.

"What did you say?" Lotta gave me a half-smile. She could tell from my attitude that I wasn't pleased.

"Nothing."

"Nothing?"

"What was I supposed to say?" I asked Lotta fiercely. "How would it work? I've got my lessons with Master Salmalín. I live in Corus! There's no use for my Gift here. What am I supposed to do, marry him and live with him and have babies with him?"

Lotta listened dutifully and when I paused, she clapped a hand over my mouth. "Adda, if I had to give up everything I had to follow Evrett all the way to Scanra and back, I would. That's how much I love him."

"I do love Trom." I ducked my head miserably. "Maybe not as much as you love Evrett."

"Then that's going to be a problem." Lotta's eyes were very serious. "You can't lead him on, Adda, not at all. That would be very cruel."

"I wasn't even." I told her. "I've never promised him anything, or told him I love him. We've only kissed and people who don't love each other can do that."

"Alright." Lotta kissed my forehead. "Just be honest with him."

"I'm trying." I suddenly felt very sorry for myself and not at all sorry for Trom. "He shouldn't have said it. He'd no right.

"Trom had every right to tell you how he felt." Lotta got to her feet, leaving me sitting beside the quilt and baby. "Watch Rowan, will you?"

"Course." I tucked the edges of the quilt tighter around the sleeping baby and lay down beside her. I looked up at the stars, almost obscured by the trees and the smoke from the fire. It had gotten late and I was getting sleepy.

The crickets chirped, adding their noise to the crackling of the fire and the murmur of voices. The drums had stopped and the flutist hadn't been present for hours. I yawned and tried to keep my eyelids from drooping.

"I'm sorry." Trom had appeared beside me and he looked more than apologetic. "I messed things up. I'm sorry."

"Alright." I laid down, snuggling against baby Rowan.

Trom laid his hand on my shoulder and I fell asleep.

Have any of you realized how often Adda shrugs? It's uncontrollable...

Just for the record, I don't always use proper grammar on purpose. I'm sure I really do make mistakes, but some of them are intentional. There are a lot of "someone and me"s in this chapter. It's driving me a little insane just to have to write it, but something tells me that Adda is a "someone and I" type of girl.

Just another sidenote, my updates are getting shorter and shorter and I'm not thrilled about it. I'm really stuck right now. Assuming it's the end of June (Midsummer), I'm probably going to skip half a year or so. It should speed things up. Anyway, tell me what you guys think. I really want to do this right.