Author's Notes:

I apologize for the HUGE gap in between posts. My RL situation has let up but only slightly so unfortunately my free time is still impacted. I don't know when next I'll be able to post but I assure you that it won't be anywhere near as long as this last drought.

I can't express how much I appreciate your patience and all the friendly reminders and well wishes that I've received. I realize that an ungodly amount of time has passed but I do have a plan in place for this story all the way to the very end.

To those of you who have decided to stick with "Time", thank you so much. And finally, thanks to T for enduring my endless questions and multiple revisions - I owe you big time!

Chapter 21 – "Truth and Consequences - part 1"

Bo strode into Néctar with a purpose and was surprised to find that it was fairly busy with most of the tables and chairs occupied. Being with Lauren had lulled her hunger momentarily but now it was back with a vengeance and unbearable. Her eyes were constantly switching from brown to blue and back again and it was taking all of her effort to remain in control and from doubling over in pain. The Succubus scanned the room till her gaze fell upon the woman at the bar. Keeping an eye on her target, she weaved through the crowd and strutted towards her.

The brunette had just placed her order and as she turned away from the bartender, walked straight into the Succubus. "Omph! Desculpe." Nayara said before realizing who she had bumped into. "Bo? What are you doing here?" The doctor asked, surprised to see her at Néctar and Lauren nowhere in sight.

Assuming that she must be looking for her best friend, she said, "If you're looking for Kenzi, she's in the midst of that group over there." Nayara pointed to the far corner of the room to where Kenzi was surrounded by approximately 20 Fae and human lab personnel; all drinking, laughing and talking. "Not only did she talk my staff and I into doing shots in order to unwind but she somehow got us to pay for hers… hence my turn at the bar." The Fae doctor chuckled.

"Kenzi can be very convincing." Bo said, smiling at her friend's antics. "But I was looking for you."

"Oh?"

Despite all of Kenzi's advice with regards to Nayara, it took her argument with Lauren for Bo to finally understand and get past her jealousy. She had fallen back into old habits and couldn't see how she was making a mess of things which was exactly what Kenzi was trying to help her avoid. Now she was hoping to make things right. Taking a deep breath, she released it and looked into the doctor's eyes. "I want to apologize." Bo said sincerely. "I've been a complete jerk towards you since I got here… I was jealous and I lashed out at you repeatedly and you didn't deserve that. I am truly sorry Nayara."

"Don't forget to add that you were a proud, immature ass." Nayara said in a firm tone while maintaining eye contact.

The Succubus clenched and unclenched her jaw at being called her out on her poor behaviour. "You're right." She sighed and gave her head a slight nod, accepting the truth. "I have been a complete and total ass but I've banished my childish Succubus self… never to return."

The Empath took a long, hard look at Bo as she quietly assessed her – the Succubus standing in front of her was definitely not the arrogant, petulant woman that had been rude from the moment she arrived in her country. Instead, she saw a dejected, humbled woman before her; her brown eyes filled with sadness and shame.

Bo's fear that she couldn't repair things with the Fae doctor grew the longer that Nayara remained silent. However, after a few more moments, the doctor leaned in and smiled genuinely, "Apology accepted."

Bo wrinkled her brow. "Just like that?!" she asked surprised.

"Yes, just like that. Unless you didn't mean it?"

"No! I mean, yes, I meant what I said. It's just… I was a real bitch to you. I guess I didn't expect to be forgiven so easily."

Nayara shrugged her shoulders and maintained her smile. "Life is too long to hold grudges, Bo."

The Succubus was still taken aback that Nayara had forgiven her and all she could do was simply nod her head quietly. She knew that if the shoe were on the other foot she most likely would be a little resentful but she was very thankful that the Empath didn't share the same sentiment. The brunette knew that she still had a ways to go to be the bigger person and wasn't quite finished swallowing her pride. "I also wanted to say thank you. I'm glad that Lauren has you on her side, looking out for her. She values your friendship greatly and after everything that she's been through… well, it says a lot about how important you are to her."

Nayara smiled brightly at her sincerity. "I cherish Lauren's friendship as well and would do anything for her. But I appreciate your saying."

Bo gave Nayara a soft smile, relieved at being able to make things right with her. But now that she had accomplished what she had set out to do, there was nothing keeping her distracted from her hunger. It had been an extremely long day of fighting off her appetite and she hadn't realized how much it had taken its toll until her vision blurred and she staggered backwards.

It was only Nayara's hands on her arm and waist that kept her from falling. "Bo, are you alright?" she asked as she steadied and guided her towards a nearby stool.

"I've been… better." she said in an attempt to downplay her condition.

Nayara watched Bo's eyes change from blue to brown and observed her link her shaking hands together on her lap. "You're hungry aren't you?" she asked in concern.

Bo ducked her head in embarrassment and released a heavy sigh. "Starving, actually." she admitted in a quiet voice, relieved to not be hiding the truth anymore. "It's been a long time since I fed and my hunger took me by surprise. I've been fighting it all day and was planning on feeding once we got back here but-" Bo stopped in mid-sentence and released a sad chuckle instead. "Well, let's just say that I've done a shitty job of keeping it together." she said regretfully.

When Nayara didn't respond and simply looked at her, Bo realized that she had just confessed to her ex-girlfriend's best friend that she needed to feed and panic quickly set in. "I mean, I don't have to have sex to feed." She quickly blurted out in an attempt to explain herself. "I can siphon chi instead but because it's been awhile since I've fed I will need multiple umm, sources, to get my fill and to avoid hurting anyone."

Nayara continued to look at Bo contemplatively causing the Succubus to feel even more uneasy than she already felt but after a few seconds, the doctor quirked her eyebrow and gave Bo's hand a quick pat. "I think I can help. Wait here."

Bo was a bit confused – not just from the disorientation from her hunger but also at what had just transpired with Nayara. She couldn't understand why the Empath would want to help or more importantly, what she could even do to help. Dumbfounded by the situation, she simply nodded her head and remained seated as she watched the doctor walk towards her group.

In that same moment, Kenzi caught sight of Bo and rushed over, flinging her arms around her neck and placing a very sloppy kiss to her cheek. "Bo! You're here!" Kenzi said excitedly before proceeding to talk without taking a breath. "You're just in time, we're doing shots! But you're going to have to catch up cuz I have a killer head start. The Fae here are uber generous with paying for drinks. I could totally move here if Trick takes away my free drinks for life." Pausing to look around, she asked, "Oy! Where's Hot Pants?"

Before Bo could respond, Kenzi put her hand up to interrupt her. "Shit, hold that thought, I gotta break the seal!" she exclaimed as she made a dash for the washroom.

Bo stood and turned her attention back to Nayara. Even though she couldn't hear what was being said she quickly figured out that she was the topic of conversation when in one synchronized movement, all heads turned and looked at her. Bo normally enjoyed capturing a room's attention but in this situation, she felt uncomfortable under their scrutiny. Fortunately the awkwardness didn't last as they quickly returned their focus to the Empath.

A couple of minutes later, the predominant sound in the bar was that of screeching chairs as the entire group pushed away from their tables simultaneously, drowning out all other noise in the room. As they walked past Bo, numerous pairs of eyes glanced at her; some smiled; some gave her a polite nod; and others looked away shyly. Nayara walked up to Bo and waited till her staff had left the bar. "Follow us to the lab. They have all agreed to help you feed."

Bo was astonished. "Why are you doing this?"

The Empath smiled warmly. "Why not? Aside from the fact that I'm a doctor and a healer, I'm also Lauren's friend and I know that she would not want you to starve. Besides, I've experienced unbearable hunger and I understand."

Bo closed her eyes momentarily and exhaled in relief. "Thank you." she said genuinely as she looked back at Nayara and gave her a crooked smile. "I'll meet you there. Just give me a few minutes to grab Kenzi."

Bo watched Nayara walk out of the bar and shook her head regretfully. "I'm such a dumbass." she muttered as she thought about how immature she'd been. Sighing, she leaned against the bar and prepared herself for the lecture she knew she was going to get from her best friend.

Lab (short while later)

Bo had given Kenzi the shortened version of why they were going to the lab which earned her a frown. "You should've told me what was going on!" the Goth chided her in frustration.

The brunette ducked her head to avoid seeing her best friend's glare. "By the time I realized, we were already out shopping. You and Lauren were having fun and I didn't want to ruin it."

Seeing Nayara and the entire group that she was drinking with, in the inner lab, Kenzi lowered her voice. "You should know by now that we wouldn't want you to starve." she said gently.

"I know. I was just trying to keep myself together. I was in a lot of pain. I still am. I just… I just didn't want to mess things up with Lauren. And I didn't want to make things awkward by feeding in front of her you know?" She said dejectedly, letting out a heavy sigh, "But it doesn't matter now, I still fucked things up."

"Oh BoBo. I'm the one who's sorry." Kenzi said sadly as she reached out for her friend's hand. "I should've known something was up with the way you were acting. I was just excited being out of Faeville and getting my shopping freak on-"

The brunette quickly silenced her friend by placing her hands on her shoulders and giving them a gentle squeeze. "Don't be sorry. I'm a big girl and should've been able to take care of my own hunger."

Kenzi nodded her understanding before asking the question that was burning in her mind. "So what happened with Lauren?"

Bo dropped her arms, took a step back and shook her head sadly. "I was just really shitty to her Kenz. I screwed up big time and I don't know if…" She stopped herself and sighed again. "I don't want to get into it now. I'll tell you later 'kay."

"Okay." she agreed. The Goth respected her friend's request, deciding that now was not the time to push the subject further but knew that she would continue this talk.

Looking over to the inner lab, Bo watched Nayara smiling and laughing with her staff. "It's just ironic that the person that I was a total bitch to is the one helping me."

"I told you she was cool." Kenzi said as she elbowed her friend gently in the ribs.

"I know. You were right." Bo said distractedly as she continued to observe the Empath.

"What was that?" Kenzi asked as she cupped her ear with her hand. "I didn't quite hear you."

Returning her attention to her friend, Bo rolled her eyes and acquiesced. "I said that you were right." she purposely mumbled before nibbling on her bottom lip to keep herself from smiling.

"Annnnd?" Kenzi drawled out.

"And… I was wrong." Bo said quietly.

"See, that wasn't so hard. Now lemme make a note of this historic moment in my calendar." Kenzi bragged as she pulled out her cell phone and skillfully avoided a playful swat from her best friend. "Now, if you don't mind, I'll just wait out here while you get your Succubus groove on."

Nayara approached Bo as she walked into the inner lab. "I explained your situation to everyone and they are willing to help. They have never experienced a Succubus feed and though curious, are understandably hesitant as they are concerned about their safety." Nayara paused to let the weight of their apprehension sink in before continuing. "Scientists are all about facts and data so if you wish to proceed, it would go a long way if you were honest with them; explain what will happen - what you're going to do and what the after effects will be - and assure them that no one will get hurt."

Bo gave the doctor a warm, comforting smile. "Please know that I appreciate their wanting to help me. I will talk to them and I promise, no one will get hurt."

"I will hold you to that promise, Bo." Nayara said seriously.

Bo nodded her understanding and maintained eye contact. "Thank you, Nayara. For everything." she said sincerely.

The Empath gave her a thin smile. "I'll be outside with Kenzi." she said before turning to leave.

Taking a deep breath and releasing it, Bo directed her attention to the group in the centre of the room and smiled seductively. "Let's do this." she said under her breath before strutting over to them.

Next Morning

A hand quickly shot out from under the covers silencing the loud and annoying alarm clock. Lauren groaned and rubbed her eyes with the heels of her hands. She had spent the entire night tossing and turning, failing to stop herself from replaying the evening's events and from supressing the multitude of emotions and questions that plagued her. It was only until the early morning hours that her thoughts had finally quieted down and sleep claimed her but with only two and a half hours of rest, her body was screaming for more. All she wanted was to stay in bed and savour the peace and quiet but unfortunately, she did not have that luxury.

Today was the day. If her test serum continued to produce successful results into the 72 hour mark tonight then they would be able to start trialing it on patients tomorrow. The doctor knew that it would be one of those hurry-up-and-wait days comprised of checking data, confirming results and ensuring that every iota was recorded. Even though it was mundane, a great deal was riding on it.

Sighing, Lauren dragged herself out of bed and slowly made her way to the bathroom, splashing water on her face in an attempt to wake up. As she stared at her reflection, thoughts of Bo snuck back into her mind, putting an end to the temporary lull. "I should've known." Lauren whispered sadly as she leaned forward with her hands against the sink for support. She was frustrated and disappointed at Bo but mostly at herself for allowing hope and expectations into her heart again.

Lauren believed that things were getting better between them and couldn't understand what happened to cause Bo's attitude to change. The thought that maybe she was wrong crossed her mind as last night's events proved that things were not copasetic. Whatever confidence she had in them was now replaced with doubt and all she could think was that she had read too much into their progress; that perhaps her hopefulness had skewed her perception of their situation.

She had always prided herself on being a very logical person but she couldn't deny that every major life decision she made in the last few years was fuelled by emotion. Bringing Nadia to the Congo; enslaving herself to the Light Fae in order to save her; and trying to keep Bo from danger while also following the Ash's orders were her top three big ones. These decisions impacted her greatly and despite all her good intentions, she regretted them immensely. Aware of her struggle between rationale and sentiment, she found herself at an impasse as to whether to protect her heart or take another chance with Bo.

Pushing away from the sink, she physically shook her head to clear her brooding thoughts. Taking a deep, cleansing breath, Lauren chastised herself for allowing her emotions to take over when she should be mentally preparing herself for what had to be done in the lab today. She knew that she had to be alert, clear headed and professional and that she couldn't allow anything to interfere with that today, of all days. Re-directing her thoughts, the blonde focused on getting ready for work.

A short while later, Lauren found herself a quiet, unoccupied table tucked away in the corner of the dining hall. Even though she didn't have much of an appetite, she knew that she should eat as it was going to be a long day. Despite knowing this, she couldn't help but be distracted as she played with her food.

The blonde had unintentionally picked a table with a clear view of the entrance and every time someone walked in, she would look up from her meal to see who it was. After a few minutes of constantly glancing up from her food, she finally realized what she was doing and pushed her plate away in frustration. For the past few days, she and Bo had been meeting for breakfast and Lauren was expecting the brunette to make an appearance but as the minutes moved past their normal meet time, it became obvious that the brunette was not going to show and the doctor grew irritated.

If Lauren had to provide a friend with relationship advice, she would rationalize that Bo was probably keeping her distance in order to give her friend time to sort out her thoughts and feelings. However, being the one experiencing the relationship problem, it was difficult to see this logic. Lauren had expected her ex to be her normal impulsive self and show up for breakfast. When Bo didn't make an appearance, the blonde felt disheartened and then annoyed because she realized that despite everything, she still wanted to see the brunette.

The doctor released a sad chuckle recognizing that she was an emotional, conflicted mess and that her plan to be alert and clear headed was quickly crumbling. Cradling her head in her hands, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath to collect herself. She knew that she had to get her mind back on track as countless lives depended on her to be professional instead of being distracted by her personal problems. She may not be able to figure out what to do or how to feel when it came to Bo but she would be damned if she let it get in the way of finding a cure for this epidemic. After taking another cleansing breath, Lauren stood up and grabbed her coffee, deciding that there was no point in delaying her arrival at the lab and that focusing on work would be exactly what she needed.

Meanwhile…

Bo woke feeling wonderful and energized, quickly whipping the sheets off her body and hopping out of bed. She felt completely sated as the chi rippled under her skin, danced behind her eyes and thrummed in her ears. Her entire body hummed and the amount of energy coursing through her made her feel as if she were levitating. Memories from the previous night quickly flooded her mind as she remembered the exact moment that she inhaled chi from Nayara's staff, putting an end to her pain and hunger.

However, her euphoria was instantly cut short as thoughts of Lauren came rushing in. Bo felt as if she were punched in the gut, causing her to gasp for air and stagger back to sit on her bed. Every hurtful word that she said to Lauren echoed in her ears and immediately crushed her chi high. Leaning forward, she rested her forearms on her knees and wrung her hands together worriedly.

Bo had known without a shadow of a doubt, that Lauren was her soul mate. It had taken losing her in Toronto to realize this and when she had, it was like a fog had lifted and she could see clearly. Everything - going back to when they had first met – finally made sense: how quickly she had fallen for her; how she had held her to a higher standard and expectation than anyone else; and why the doctor was the only one who could bring her back whenever her Succubus took over. That's why when Lauren had lied to her, it hurt more than she could ever have imagined - more than when Dyson had - and she lashed out. Bo felt horrible for how she had treated her after the whole spy-bang and Kitsune situation but understanding how she felt about the blonde, helped her understand why she reacted the way she had.

With this awareness, Bo only wanted to make things right with Lauren but with last night's disastrous sequence of events, she was very aware that if the shoe were on the other foot, she would have serious concerns about their relationship. Knowing that she felt that way, how could she expect Lauren to feel differently?

Any hope that Bo had for their relationship died with that realization. All along she had been preparing for a worst case scenario of unrequited love if all Lauren wanted was friendship but she hadn't considered that the blonde may not want her in her life in any capacity until now.

Bo desperately needed a plan. She always took pride in being able to think outside of the box as it helped her solve cases and find a way out of many predicaments but now, she found herself stuck with no solution in sight to fix things with Lauren. Knowing what the horrible outcome was going to be and not be able to avoid it was unbearable.

Glancing at her watch, she noted the time and without thinking, automatically made her way to the front door, stopping just as her hand gripped the door knob. Every fibre of her being wanted to run to the dining hall to meet Lauren but she had to force herself to respect the blonde's wishes and give her some space. Turning abruptly, she wrapped her arms around her torso in an attempt to keep herself from falling apart and began pacing.

When Kenzi shuffled into the living room a couple hours later, that's how she found Bo – walking back and forth across the living room, pausing sometimes to distractedly look out the window before resuming her pacing. Sitting on the couch, the younger woman stretched her arms above her head and sat back, her gaze never leaving her friend.

"There must be a coffee shortage in Brazil cuz I don't see a hot cup of java anywhere." The petite woman said, trying to keep the mood light while trying to ascertain how bad things really were.

Bo stopped in front of the window with her back to Kenzi, letting silence settle between them for a while before replying with a sigh. "I didn't go to the Dining Hall for breakfast this morning."

Raising an eyebrow, the Goth asked, "Too busy pacing?"

"I'm giving Lauren space." Bo said in an almost whisper, her shoulders slumped.

Kenzi already knew that Bo's mood had something to do with the blonde but was tired of wondering what had transpired. "Bo." she said firmly to capture the brunette's attention. "Sit down and talk to me."

Bo felt sick to her stomach; she knew that it was her fault that things with Lauren were coming to an end and she felt useless. Sighing, she forced herself away from the window and moved to the couch; sitting next to Kenzi, she grabbed a throw pillow and hugged it to her chest. She was quiet for a while as she sorted out her thoughts but when she started talking, everything tumbled out –what she said and did in her jealous Succubus hunger-rage; how Lauren reacted; her regret; and waiting for Lauren's decision.

Kenzi listened quietly, absorbing every word. She still couldn't believe that she was so clueless about Bo's hunger and felt badly for not seeing the signs. As she sat there, she wondered if the two women would be able to get back on track but what really worried her was Bo's frame of mind. Seeing Bo hit rock bottom when Lauren left Toronto was something that Kenzi didn't want to see her friend go through again but she couldn't help but feel déjà vu watching Bo look so forlorn clutching the pillow.

Bo looked and was acting, defeated. Kenzi needed to give her friend some hope - she needed her to believe that it wasn't over and that she could still salvage things with Lauren. Prying the pillow out of her grip, she took the brunette's hands in hers and gently squeezed them to give her some reassurance. "You need to tell Lauren the truth. Tell her that you were starving for chi and needed to feed and that you weren't yourself because of your hunger." she said firmly.

Bo shook her head dejectedly. "After everything, why would she believe me? She's given me so many chances and I fucked them all up."

"Because she's Lauren and because she deserves to know the truth." Kenzi said resolutely. "You said that you needed a plan. I'm giving you one. Tell her! What other choice do you have? Do nothing and watch her walk away from you forever? Is that what you want?!"

"No! That's not what I want." the brunette yelled out, unable to stop her tears from falling. "I love her."

Kenzi looked at her friend with soft eyes. "Then tell her the truth." She repeated in a firm but gentle tone.

Bo ran her fingers through her hair in frustration but when she opened her mouth to speak, there was only silence. Shaking her head sadly, she looked away and gazed at the window, trying to come to terms with her emotions.

The Goth gave the brunette's hands a gentle squeeze to let her know that she was there for her and wasn't judging her. It was a simple action that spoke volumes and was all the encouragement that Bo needed.

"I… I'm ashamed to face her Kenz. I was an asshole and I hurt her. Again. Part of me believes that I deserve whatever I have coming even if it means Lauren not wanting me in her life." She whispered as she wiped at her wet cheeks.

The Goth felt her heart break at her friend's admission. "Oh Bo, what you deserve is to be happy. You both do." she said as she pulled the brunette into a tight embrace. Kenzi's words ripped through whatever defences Bo had remaining and began to sob. The petite woman continued to console her friend and once the brunette stopped trembling against her, she pulled back slowly and gently wiped her tear stained cheeks.

"I owe you an apology, Kenz."Bo said in a small voice as she looked into her friend's eyes.

"What for?" the Goth asked, puzzled.

"For taking your chi to save Dyson and almost killing you." Bo said sadly. "I didn't mean to hurt you or Lauren. I was just trying to bring Dyson back and by the time I realized what I had done, I didn't know how to face either of you. I'm so sorry."

Kenzi looked at her friend with kind eyes. "I admit I was a little scared but I knew that you'd never intentionally hurt me. I understand why you did it. It's all good Bo." the petite woman said genuinely as she squeezed her friend's hands.

The brunette wiped her bloodshot eyes and gave her friend a sad smile in response.

"How about we get cleaned up and get something to eat? We'll both feel a little better with some food and coffee in our stomachs and then we can work on a plan. Okay?"

Bo felt drained and all she could do was nod and comply.

Kenzi helped her friend up from the couch and watched her walk to her room, all the while hoping that telling Lauren the truth would make things right between them.

TBC