Hey y'all! Sorry it's taking me forever between updates . . . seems like I have so many activities competing for my attention that I feel like a kid who's missed her last twenty doses of Ritalin!
One of those activities is trying to get the word out about my debut novel, With Good Behavior. Thank you to Ana for reading and reviewing the novel over on goodreads(dot)com!
21. Suicide Romance, Part Two
Sitting in his lap, Bella flooded Edward's keen senses. Her luminous brown eyes blinked back at him. Her lilting voice played its symphony, drowning out the sound of crashing surf far below the cliff face. The feathery press of her bottom on his thighs, her legs wrapped around his back and her arms draped on his shoulders, competed with the softness of her hips resting beneath his curled palms. The taste of her, strawberries and dew, washed down his throat as she leaned in to kiss him again. But her scent . . . her scent is what undid him, initiating an opiate eruption in his brain so exquisite that it rivaled the finest grade heroin high.
"Charlie's not going to kill you, Bella," he whispered between kisses, unable to hide the hint of amusement in his voice.
Beholden by his ochre gaze and his full lips, she tried to think straight. "Maybe not at first," she conceded. "He'll make sure I'm okay first, then he'll kill me."
Edward chuckled.
She pulled back. "But when he knows we're back together again, he might want to kill you."
A small frown crept onto his chiseled features. "He's a smart man." He looked away. "He knows how much I've hurt you."
She cupped his granite chin, turning his face back to her. "I'm not hurting anymore, as long as you're here. As long as you never leave."
His eyes bore into her with a solemn promise. "I've learned my lesson, Miss Swan."
"Good." Her winning smile sparked a feeling of warmth spreading all through his chest.
~~ o * o ~~
Charlie busted into Billy's small house, shouting, "Bella!"
He stopped short once he noticed Jacob, Sam, and Paul crouched over the room's one piece of furniture, blocking Charlie's view of the body lying prone on the ratty sofa. The only part of the body visible was a man's feet, encased in some dirty work boots. At least the prone man wasn't Billy - Charlie was relieved to find him in his wheelchair as usual, also straining to see around the massive Quileutes.
Charlie spoke sharply. "Billy!"
His friend's wise eyes drifted over from the sofa, looking at once distressed and dazed.
"Have you seen Bella?"
Billy squinted, appearing confused.
"Bella!" Charlie railed. "I have to find her!"
"I'm starting CPR!" Sam announced, leading Jacob and Paul dutifully to step back, providing a clear view of the prone man.
Charlie gasped. "What's wrong with Harry?"
"We don't know," Billy answered, sharing a grim look with his son. "He just collapsed, and the boys dragged him over to the sofa."
An eerie pall cast over the group as they watched Sam administer quick chest compressions, looking like he was going to crack open Harry's chest with his forceful thrusts.
Sickened by the sight, Charlie recovered enough to return to the reason he'd come in so frantically. "Jacob! I have to find Bella. Do you know where she is?"
"She's not here." Jacob looked down. "And I don't think she's coming back anytime soon." He didn't have his long hair anymore to hide the look of guilt on his face.
"What the hell does that mean?" Charlie took a step closer. "She was here?"
"Yeah."
"What did you do to her?"
Jacob flinched back like he'd been punched. "I would never hurt her! Sure, she was upset, but that's not my fault."
Sam moved to puff a couple of breaths into Harry's mouth before quickly resuming the compressions.
Charlie ripped his gaze away from that scene, looking desperate. "Why was Bells upset? What'd you tell her?"
Swallowing, Jacob glanced at Paul, who was glaring back at him. Jacob shrugged. "I told her Cullen was back in town."
The police chief's jaw became unhinged. "Edward Cullen? He's back?"
"I thought she deserved to know."
Charlie swiftly crossed over to Jacob, now inches from him, jabbing a finger into his steroid-enhanced chest. "Then you deserve to know that Bella's going to commit suicide!"
Jacob looked shocked. "What?"
Charlie's glower was intense. "What did you say to her? I want to know exactly what sent her over the edge!"
Billy butted in, "Now hold on, Charlie - "
"She left me a phone message!" Charlie fumed. "She's going to try to kill herself . . . I, I have to find her . . ."
"He's back!" Sam shouted, drawing the group's attention to the gasping man on the sofa. "Harry's breathing again."
At that moment, Charlie's cell phone rang and he swiftly swung it to his ear, bracing himself for whatever news awaited him.
"She's okay," Nina told him in a tremulous voice. "Bella's alright."
Charlie staggered backward until he thumped against the wall. His wobbly knees gave out and he slid down to the worn brown carpet. "Oh, God."
"What is it?" In a flash Jacob was kneeling down in front of him. "Is it Bella?"
His police chief demeanor was noticeably absent, replaced by the shaking vestiges of a scared father. "Bells is okay."
Nina continued, "I'm near the cliffs."
Charlie's voice rose in alarm. "The cliffs? She's going to jump?"
Jacob's eyes grew big. "She's at the cliffs?"
"She's not going to jump," Nina countered. "Edward Cullen's with her. He won't let her jump."
"And how exactly do you know that?" Charlie snapped. "Cullen's the reason she's depressed in the first place!"
"Because I can see them both clearly from my car," Nina explained, relief flooding her voice. "They're holding each other. Looks to me like they've reconciled."
Jacob's eyes narrowed as he gave Sam a pointed glare.
Charlie began pushing himself into a standing position. "Stay there and make sure she's safe - I'm on my way. I'm going to get to the bottom of this . . . Bella has a lot to answer for right now."
A shadow blocked the afternoon light from the doorway and Charlie looked up to see Jacob obstructing his intended exit. Sam had somehow sidled up to him as well.
"Chief, we need you to take Harry to the hospital," Sam insisted.
"Hold on, Nina," he said into the phone, glancing guiltily in Harry's direction, noticing his friend sitting up and trying to breathe with Paul's assistance. "Is Harry okay?"
"For now," Sam said, "but we gotta get him to the hospital pronto."
Nina could overhear part of their conversation, and asked, "Something's wrong with Uncle Harry?"
Charlie felt the strain of trying to carry on two conversations at once. He decided to answer Nina, "I'm at Billy's. They said Harry just collapsed."
A strangled cry came across the line.
"The ambulance takes too long to get to the res," Sam argued. "Your police car's the fastest way."
"Come on, Sam," Jacob pleaded, a faint whine mixing into a growl in his voice. Charlie turned to see the boy's fists clenched and his body trembling with a restless energy, one foot out the door.
Charlie felt torn. "I have to get to Bella."
"I'll go to Bella," Jacob said, taking long strides to the sofa and helping Harry to his feet. "C'mon, Harry, Charlie's taking you to the hospital."
"Now wait a minute," Charlie protested, but Jacob, acting deaf, was practically carrying Harry out to the cruiser at this point, with Paul rushing in to assist.
Wheeling his chair closer to Charlie, Billy added, "You said Bella's okay, right? The boys will go make sure, if you can please take care of Harry."
With a bewildered look, feeling engineered into putting his friend ahead of his daughter, Charlie paused. Nina was waiting silently, and he asked her, "You sure Bells is okay?"
"Yes. I'll go talk to her, try to get her to go home, and we'll wait for you there, okay?"
Charlie sighed. "Okay. I'll take Harry to the hospital."
Nina said, "Thank you, Charlie. Um, can you call Aunt Sue and tell her about this?"
"You want me to call Sue?" Charlie wondered why Nina didn't want to call her.
"I'll call Sue," Billy promised. "Now go, Charlie. Harry doesn't look so good."
Charlie headed out the door in a haze, still holding his phone as he noticed Harry in the back seat of the cruiser with a growing group of Quileutes standing next to the car arguing. Clutching his phone, Charlie said, "We'll make it, Nina. You take care of my daughter and I'll take care of your uncle, okay?"
Nina nodded. "Okay."
He ended the call and approached the boys, appearing surprised to find that two more had arrived. One of them was as big as the others, but one was noticeably smaller.
The big one, Embry, pointed to the small one. "I brought him over once I heard his dad collapsed."
Charlie stared at the younger boy. "Seth?"
The boy's face was flushed, keeping an eye on his father. "Hi, Chief Swan. Can we get going?"
"Seth's going with you," Sam explained.
Charlie looked confused. "Why aren't you coming? You know CPR."
"We'll go to make sure Bella's okay," Sam said.
Jacob sported a macabre grin along with his trembling eagerness, further confusing Charlie, who said, "I thought Jacob was the one going . . . oh, never mind, we gotta hurry."
He and Seth slid into the front and back seats, respectively, and Charlie's tires spun on the gravel as he peeled out of the driveway. Throwing the gear into drive, he glanced back at the house just as he flipped on the siren.
The four Quileutes were nowhere to be seen.
~~ o * o ~~
Nina looked down at her cell phone, stroking it uncertainly a few times. She should call her mother. Wuti would want to know that her brother was being rushed to the hospital. However, Nina knew that Wuti would freak out, and such an emotional disturbance certainly wouldn't help her mother's fragile health or self-care for the diabetes. And what if Uncle Harry turned out to be fine? The freak-out would be all for nothing.
Maybe Nina would wait to find out Harry's exact status before calling her mother. She'd been through enough emotional turmoil today and she didn't think she could handle Wuti's anguish on top of it all. Maybe she'd make sure Bella was safe before taking Wuti to the hospital.
Nina looked again at the embracing couple, sitting about three-hundred yards away from the berm of the road where she'd pulled over minutes ago. She thought she had made out Edward looking at her car over Bella's shoulder, as if he could see her and identify her from that far distance, but she was relatively sure Bella was unaware of her presence.
She opened her car door and stood up, surprised by her unsteadiness. Nina impulsively reached out to clutch the hood of the car, blinking quickly and trying to quell her shaking. She felt woozy and wobbly on her feet. Realizing that adrenaline had been flowing non-stop since receiving Bella's phone message, Nina struggled to take a few deep breaths.
It didn't happen again.
Bella didn't commit suicide. She's okay.
Nina felt tears spring to her eyes as the heaviness of loss tugged down her heart. Adam. If only she could have stopped him. If only she still had her son in her life.
Sniffing and wiping away a few tears, Nina closed the car door and squared her shoulders, beginning to walk toward the couple.
Closer to the cliff, Edward smoothed his cool hand down Bella's temple, tucking strands of chocolate hair behind her ear while informing her, "Nina is here."
Bella jumped a bit in his arms, lifting her head to scan around her. She swiveled around and saw her psychologist walking toward them. "Oh!" she squeaked. "Oh, no."
Edward looked perplexed. "You don't want to see her?"
Bella's shoulders slumped. "I called her, too."
"I see." Together he guided them up to their feet, and they held hands, waiting for Nina to come closer.
When she arrived, Edward was about to greet her but then hesitated. He'd told Bella he'd eavesdropped on her sessions, but she didn't know about his sessions with the psychologist.
Nina glanced at Edward and then landed her gaze on Bella. "That was quite a disturbing phone message you left, Bella. How are you?"
"I'm sorry to worry you." Bella winced. "I'm doing fine now."
Edward wondered why lingering fear lined the psychologist's face despite finding out that Bella was safe.
"Nina." Bella halted, chewing on her lip. "This is Edward. This is him."
Edward gave a tight smile. "Hello, Dr. Carlton."
"Nice to meet you, Edward. You've, uh, you've come back to town then?"
He seemed relieved that she was pretending not to know him. "Yes, ma'am."
Nina looked at Bella. "And how do you feel about his return?"
Bella's gaze was direct. "So grateful." She lovingly looked up at Edward.
Edward gave her a sad smile and then drew their conjoined hands up to his mouth, placing a cool kiss on her opaque skin.
Nina observed the exchange with an inquisitive look.
"I know that's not what you want to hear," Bella said, turning back to Nina and appearing worried about her reaction. "But I love him."
"It's never been about what I want to hear," Nina countered. "And if you love him, then I am very happy for you. I'm happy for you both. Love is a beautiful thing." She smiled wisely. "But Bella, are you sure this is what you want? Just an hour ago you were calling me, in complete distress, about to do God knows what." Nina's voice choked up, but she got out, "You were saying goodbye to me. I thought I lost you!"
Suddenly Edward understood why Nina looked like she was teetering on the edge. He and Jasper had discovered that Nina's son had committed suicide, and flashes of that awful night now riddled her brain. Edward could see her vision of a tall, well-built body strewn on the bedroom floor, a gun in his lifeless hand . . .
Bella ducked her head.
Nina managed to ask, "Do you still want to kill yourself?"
"No." Bella's voice was firm. "And that's not about Edward showing up, either. I want to live, for me. You were right . . . I am strong."
This seemed to placate Nina, until she turned to stare at Edward. "Why did you show up?"
He squirmed a bit, knowing he couldn't disclose Alice's precognition about Bella jumping off the cliff. "I ascertained that my departure wasn't good for either of us. I was an untidy mess, and when I found out that Bella was hurting too - something I'd never intended - I knew I had to return. I had to beg her to allow me another chance, and to promise that I wouldn't squander her love this time."
Nina looked at him thoughtfully. "You're taking a risk on love."
He shook his head, gently squeezing Bella's shoulder. "I'm not the one taking the risk. She is. But I'll stand by her and try to protect her the best I can."
Nina let that sink in, then asked Bella, "And you're willing to take him back?"
Bella's head readily bobbed up and down.
Remembering a story Nina had taught him, Edward scooped both of Bella's hands in his, cradling them in cool marble. "Bella, may I ask you a question?"
"Yes."
His earnest eyes blazed, making her heart pound. "What is it that you desire most in this world?"
She grinned. "That's easy. You."
He still looked skeptical. "Are you sure?"
"Irrevocably."
Edward couldn't help it; his smile soon matched Bella's. He leaned in to kiss her forehead, then let his lips descend to find hers.
Nina watched them share the most tender kiss she'd ever witnessed, at first embarrassing her, and then stridently knocking down her doubts and fears about their relationship. Bella clearly knew what she wanted, and clearly that was Edward. Though there would still be some issues to be worked out, their union seemed strong, forged by choice and not by desperation.
Edward abruptly pulled away from the kiss, darting his vision to the line of trees.
"What is it?" Bella asked.
"Consequences," he replied, his voice tight.
Nina took a step back, feeling uneasy from the tension overtaking the teenagers.
She and Bella gaped when a colossal black wolf skulked out of the forest, heading in their direction.
Edward instinctively crouched, stepping in front of the women and waiting for others to join Sam. He didn't have to wait long. Three more massive wolves trotted behind the leader, covering the distance quickly with their soundless, long strides. He cursed himself for not anticipating this. He was standing on their ground, and he knew he didn't have a leg to stand on.
"The wolves are back," Bella whispered.
"You've seen them before?" Nina asked incredulously.
"In the meadow." Bella gulped. "They didn't hurt me, though."
As they approached, Nina took a closer look at the shaggy beasts, blinking quickly. "Oh my . . . I thought it was just a legend."
Bella gave her a puzzled look.
Edward whipped around to face them. "Stay behind me, Bella . . . it's too late for me to take you to safety. But Dr. Carlton, you should go. Run to your car. They won't follow you - they don't want you."
Nina stared at him. "How do you know that?"
He shared a guilty glance with Bella. It was hardly the appropriate time to share his mindreading abilities with the psychologist.
He sighed, squaring his shoulders. "Because they want me."
"No!" Bella gave a cry of anguish.
The four wolves had descended on them, forming a semicircle around the three, and it seemed that Nina now was going nowhere. Sam sat down on his haunches twenty feet away from Edward, and Jacob prowled impatiently to his left, his ripping growls making Bella and Nina tremble.
It was silent for several seconds. Edward's voice was silky smooth as he spoke to the black one. "It was unquestionably not my choice to come here. I had to. Bella's life was in danger."
Bella's forehead creased. "What wasn't a choice?" She peered at Edward. "Wait . . . you're speaking to them? You can hear them?"
Nina looked stunned by Bella's question, and Edward avoided the psychologist's prying gaze, turning back to Sam to answer the shouted accusations from the alpha. "Yes, I'm quite aware of the consequences of breaking the treaty. Please allow me to take Bella and Nina to safety, and then I'll return to face them."
The russet wolf snorted mockingly, and Bella tried to make sense of the one-sided conversation. Edward's voice got tight. "No! These three pups cannot be trusted. I refuse to allow Bella to be alone with them once you've finished with me."
He whipped his head to the side to find Jacob stealthily easing closer to Bella, honing in on her with a single-minded purpose. Edward roared, "You stay away from her, Jacob Black!"
Bella gasped, looking horrified. "Jacob?"
Jacob halted, his reddish fur bristling. Witnessing her horror, he slowly backed away, whimpering.
Nina watched Bella try to make sense of what was happening, and she was just as confused.
"Edward!" Bella cried. "What, what's happening? Why did you call him Jacob?"
Edward gazed into Sam's glossy black eyes. "Please. Allow me a minute to explain."
Sam held his gaze for a few seconds before giving a reluctant nod.
Edward turned his back on the wolves and drew Bella to him, cradling her in a hug. Jacob rumbled another growl in their direction. "I'm so sorry. I should have taken leave once I found out you were safe, but I couldn't. I couldn't leave." He glanced up at Nina. "And now I've brought you both to danger."
"Do they mean to kill us?" Bella asked.
Edward smiled sadly. "No. You're not in violation of the treaty."
"What do you mean . . . what treaty?"
"My family and I are not to step on Quileute lands."
Nina had been taking this all in, and a realization dawned on her. In a wondrous voice, she said, "You're a cold one."
When Edward's glowing eyes slowly lifted to meet hers, Nina found herself taking a few involuntary steps backward.
He felt sickened by her fear of him, and let go of Bella. "I am."
Bella watched the psychologist's face, shaking her head in disagreement of Nina's frightened expression. "Edward won't hurt you, Nina."
Jacob's snort echoed behind them.
Nina kept her eyes trained on Edward, pointing to the wolves. "They're here to protect us. From you. You made them shift. You changed these boys' lives."
"Edward, what is she talking about?" Bella pleaded.
He looked down. "These are shape-shifters, Bella . . . Sam, Jacob, Paul, and Embry. Mortal enemies of my family. Carlisle signed a treaty with their grandfathers long ago, and I've just broken it. They've come to enforce the consequences."
Bella drew in a sharp intake of air. "Enemies? No . . . no! But, but, but Jacob is my friend. He would never hurt you."
A bitter smile formed on his full lips. "Jacob has been waiting for this opportunity for some time."
Edward spun around, not bothering to hide his supernatural speed from Nina anymore. He looked up at the looming wolves, seeming to listen to Sam for a few seconds. A look of resignation hardened on his face. "Thank you. That is all I ask."
Turning back to the humans, he first looked at Nina. "Thank you, Dr. Carlton. Thank you for trying to help me. You're very good at what you do. Please . . . please keep looking after Bella."
Edward then wrapped Bella in a desperate hug, pressing her cheek to his chest with an urgency she'd never felt from him before. Though she wasn't exactly sure what was happening, she had an inkling what he was doing, leading her to start crying in his arms.
He whispered in her ear, "I love you, Bella. So much. You are the brilliant stars in my never-ending sky. You stay strong for me, alright?"
"No," she moaned.
He quelled her protests by kissing her deeply, intensely, making her go limp in his arms. "Stay strong," he urged, firmly setting her down. His jaw clenched, and his voice was resolute.
"Now go, both of you. They promised me they'd let you get to safety."
"No!" Bella yelled.
Edward's mouth trembled. "Go." He took sure steps back toward the awaiting wolves.
"No!" Bella screamed, yearning to rush forward but held in place by the fierce look in his eyes, a look of anguished goodbye.
He stopped when he was right in front of Sam, dwarfed by the huge wolf.
Bella sobbed as the wolves circled the vampire, their tails swishing in anticipation. "No," she cried.
Edward closed his eyes, waiting for the Quileutes to rip him apart.
Author's Note:
The setting of a cliff seems to make me want to write repeated cliffhangers. Hmm . . . ;)
While it is a pleasure to write this fic, sadly I'm finding that the level of response to my story does influence my motivation to write. If you regularly review, thank you so much. If you're a lurker, would you consider leaving a comment about this chapter? I'd really appreciate it.
9/29/10 is the last day to enter the giveaway on my blog jenniferlanebooks(dot)blogspot(dot)com. I'm giving away two vampire books, one featuring a vampire named Edward in therapy! If you read this after 9/29, feel free to stop by the blog and say hello.
Take care, Jen