Chapter 21- Kobayashi Maru
During the whole conversation, Spock had made himself inconspicuous in the corner of the room. He had been so quiet that I had almost forgotten he was there, but I suddenly became aware of his presence when he swiftly moved to my side.
"I…did you just say that there were more humans besides me?" I gasped.
"While you were most prized, there were more, yes." She said in an even tone.
I sat straight up and gave a desperate laugh. "What in the hell makes me so goddamn special?" I demanded. I wondered why I had been separated from the others. Why had I been denied contact with them? All this time I thought I was alone…
"Because Saren said you were learned." She explained calmly. "While most of the slave classes toil in hard labor until the moment of their death, an educated slave would have been of great value. We had three humans on the ship when we were attacked, all determined by Saren to be of great worth. One male died in transit and the other female perished when the transporter malfunctioned and her signal was lost."
"Sindari," Spock said with great care, "how many humans were taken in total?"
She glared at him and he returned her gaze in equal measure. "It is no secret that our people have been at war for centuries," she spat in irritation, "we hold the humans in low regard, but Vulcans are beneath the slave classes."
Spock did not flinch as he calmly said, "The history of our people is indeed long and filled with strife. However, you and I find ourselves here in this place far away from our people because we both in our own ways rejected that history. As the doctor said, neither of us can atone for the acts of our ancestors, we can only be responsible for our own actions in this time and place. Neither of us can again awaken the dead; what can be done is to account for the lives of the humans which may yet remain. So the question still stands, how many humans were captured and what became of them?"
She regarded him in spiteful silence for a few moments. Finally she turned to me and answered, "There were 10 in all. The remaining 7 were placed on another ship and are awaiting the return of Saren. He will not give up or return to Romulus until he reclaims his prize."
"Then we must retrieve them." Spock stated as though there were no other options to be considered.
She looked at him disdainfully before again addressing me. "Now I have told you all that I am guilty of. The next step in your tradition is forgiveness."
I felt my teeth grinding. "Forgiveness is not automatically granted in exchange for an apology. I am not required to forget what you have done." Her eyes reflected genuine despair and I immediately regretted being so quick to anger. "However," I started slowly, "if you are truly remorseful for your actions, then I will forgive you. But just as you cannot accept responsibility for the actions of others, I can only grant forgiveness on behalf of myself. It will be up to the others to decide what they will do."
"Jolan Tru." She said again as Spock and I turned to go. I turned quickly to her and muttered goodbye when I noticed a single tear fall from her eye. It was heart breaking, but I had other business to attend to.
I sighed heavily while we waited for a lift. I felt exhausted- completely mentally drained. "I must admit, Doctor, I did not anticipate for you to overlook your anger as much as you did to show compassion to the woman you previously wished to attack." Spock said in a neutral tone.
"Yeah, me either." I confessed. "But sometimes we humans find ourselves in a moment of grace that allows us to transcend the circumstances despite our deepest desires for revenge."
"I am curious then," he stated turning toward me, "as you gave me a logic puzzle, I will give you one befitting the current situation. It is a simulation I designed for Starfleet cadets in the command track."
"Oh Jesus," I murmured shaking my head, "if it is something you designed, I doubt Steven Hawking could figure it out."
"I would be very interested in his solution." He replied. "However, the parameters of this thought experiment are as follows: your fellow humans are held in a cargo vessel in enemy territory. As the Captain of the Enterprise you can decide to rescue the humans, but you will be attacked and sustain heavy damage and casualties, possibly even the destruction of the ship. Alternatively, you can elect to allow your human counterparts to perish at the hands of the enemy. Which do you choose?"
I thought about it as the lift carried us back to 10 forward. "How many people would I lose if I decided to rescue them?" I asked thoughtfully.
"An unknown number." He answered simply.
"Great." I sighed. "How many prisoners are there?"
"Less than 300." He replied.
After a moment more I looked at him and made my choice. "Let them die."
His eyebrow shot up in surprise. "Interesting. The same conclusion reached by Mr. Sulu on his exam. May I ask how you arrived at your solution?"
"Cost benefit analysis multiplied by utilitarianism." I said coldly. "There are only 300 prisoners. If I attempt a rescue that will at the very least cause heavy damage, the casualties on the ship are most likely going to greatly exceed the number of prisoners. So, the question becomes when does the need of the few outweigh the rights of the many? In this case it doesn't, so it is in the best interest of everyone that I do nothing and let them die."
"I must confess, Doctor, I did not expect you to make that choice." He said with a small measure of amusement as we exited the lift.
"And why is that, Spock?" I asked. "Is it because you thought I would have a particularly strong drive to save my own kind, or the fact that I choose to spend my time dealing with mushy, messy emotional stuff that can cloud rational judgment?" I teased.
"I would have attributed it to both, but I conclude now that I would have been in error." He replied with a slight bow. "However, I can assure you the Captain will choose a novel solution with a very low probability of succeeding but will end up doing so despite himself."
"Hey!" Jim turned his blue eyes in our direction at the sound of his First Officer's voice. "That was fast. How did it go?"
It was a matter of minutes before the ship had been mobilized and we were screaming across the vast expanse of space at warp 9 headlong into Romulan airspace.