Chapter 21 - Could I be any more of an ass?
Christian's POV
"Taylor, I want you to shut this shit down. Get on the phone to the editor-in-chief at the Nooz and ensure that this fucking article is removed" I bark from the back of the SUV, Taylor is driving us to Salon Seven on Pine Street where Sawyer is waiting with Ana.
I am seething. Actually seething doesn't' even begin to cover how I am feeling right now. All I can think about is this fucking story and what it said, seeing the two of them in that picture together all fucking sunshine and smiles. I feel the bile rise in my throat when I echo the words in my head once more.
"There wasn't a day where we weren't all over each other"
"We would secretly meet at different spots on campus and have sex, the cafeteria, the bathrooms even the laundry room. It was so hot and she loved every minute of it"
"I know what pushes her buttons better than anyone"
No fuck head you don't! If this little asshole thinks he knows my girlfriend better than me he has got another thing coming, I couldn't give a shit that he was with her for three years and that we only met not even two months ago, he doesn't know her like I do. He experienced, young, eighteen year old Ana who most probably didn't even know what she wanted from life, he doesn't know Ana now. My Ana.
When he said that he didn't think she would stay with me for very long because of my lifestyle I damn near stopped breathing, that hit a raw nerve. The details of their sex life being spread out in front of me made my stomach roil, I was seconds away from vomiting in my office when I read that but this, this made me feel even worse.
I'm already petrified that I will lose Ana and it's only a matter of time before she realises what a mistake being with me was and leaves, but I'll be fucking damned if I lose her without putting up a fight, we have a lot of issues to work through and things are bad enough with having this Brody shit hanging over us but now I have to contend with this also, I phoned Sawyer and told him not to tell Ana about the article until I arrived, I don't want her reading this I know how much it will upset her, she will feel humiliated and exposed and I definitely don't want her to leave the salon without my protection with the amount of paparazzi that are camped outside.
As we turn into Pine Street we immediately come to a halt due to the press taking up the roads and the side walks, their flocking around the salon like a pack of blood thirsty hounds trying to get a shot of Ana, I can only imagine what she must be thinking right now. "I know Ana and I know she isn't made for the lifestyle he can provide, it's only a matter of time before she throws in the towel and leaves" Those damn words return to the forefront of my mind to haunt me, I feel my stomach muscles clenching, and twisting and I come over feverish all of a sudden, I yank my tie off completely and throw it onto the seat next to me.
When the media discovered our relationship three days ago, they have been following Anastasia's every move ever since, where she goes, what she wears, who she's with. Sawyer is not to leave her side under any circumstances when I am not with her, I don't even want her going to the grocery store down the road without security, I know how to deal with these bastards and I know how relentless they are when it comes to getting a money shot.
I can tell that Ana is overwhelmed with the amount of attention she is receiving right now and that only fuels my anxieties further, she's a twenty three year old woman that has been thrust into the limelight without warning or without desire, all she did was fall in love with me and now she has to face these dickheads every day. Her life will never be the same again now she is Christian Grey's girlfriend, even if she does leave me she will always be under scrutiny from them simply because she has been associated with me. I'll never let her leave me.
Taylor sounds the horn to get the fuckers to move out of the way but as soon as they recognise the car all hell breaks loose, they charge forward like a herd of elephants and barricade the car trying to get a picture of me but I know their actions are futile as the windows are heavily tinted and you can't see a thing looking in from the outside. This is absolutely fucking ridiculous, Anyone would think I was standing for election with the amount of attention I am receiving, but I know that they are all killing themselves to get a shot of my reaction, Ana is my first real girlfriend and the first woman that I have allowed myself to be photographed with, I even avoided the cameras when Macy attended the Coping Together after party so I know that this is like bringing home the bacon for them.
"Taylor stop the car, It will take fucking hours to move these vultures"
"Sir it's not safe to leave the car, I don't see how we can get Miss Steele to the car at this moment in time there are far too many people" Fuck I'm not waiting any longer, I need to get my girl out of here and back to Escala pronto.
"Have Sawyer meet us halfway then, I'm not waiting another minute"
As soon as I see the salon door open I am barrelling out of the car at lightening speed with Taylor next to me, Sawyer is holding Ana by the arm and I can't get to her fast enough, I can hear the shouts and screams from the crowds but I blank them out, I have to blank them out because when I hear one of them yell - "Who's better in bed?!"I have to fight the urge to shove his fucking camera down his miserable throat.
Once I reach her I take the arm that Sawyer was holding and pretty much drag her back through the crowds, I catch her eye and she looks confused, scared and pissed off. So my guess is that she has already discovered the piece and knows everything.
I turn to face her once we are in the confines of the car, she looks so fucking beautiful and I want nothing more than to pull her onto my lap and hold her, that must have been terrifying for her. They were practically on top of her whilst screaming obscenities in her direction and I pray to god that she didn't hear half of them.
But the asshole side of me refuses to even touch her, I can't even bring myself to look at her in the eye for more than several seconds at a time, I know I shouldn't be angry at her but I am. I'm furious at her and I know it's pathetic and immature and the only reason I am so pissed off is because it reiterates the fact that she has had a life before me, when she told me about this prick in Paris I could feel my blood boil and my teeth clench , and then when we were at my parents house she said she had a lot of good times at college, Yeah, she wasn't fucking kidding! I can barely think about her being with Brody for too long but this is even worse, she was with this guy for three years so she must have had deep feelings for him, you don't stay in a three year relationship just for the sake of it.
"Escala Taylor" I divert my attention from my girlfriend to the window and gaze outside, I don't even know what to say right now. I feel like if I speak I will blow my top and say something I will really regret.
"Have you seen it?" I hear the soft voice from beside me and I can already hear the hurt underlying there.
"What do you think Ana, of course I've fucking seen it" See what I mean? Asshole
"Are you angry with me?" No baby, I'm just a jealous dick head that can't stand the thought of you with anyone else
"I don't want to discuss this now Anastasia"
"Well I do Christian!" I see her shift in the corner of my eye so that she is facing me and I force myself to return the eye contact. She looks even more frustrated than she did before and I know I deserve a slap right now.
"I said not now Ana, wait until we get to Escala" She huffs and leans back into her seat, pouting as she folds her arms across her chest. She looks like a child being scolded right now but I know that I am the only one that is acting like the child.
As soon as Taylor parks the car in the garage I open Ana's door so she can climb out, I offer my hand to her based on good manners but she slaps it away and storms off in the direction of the elevator. She's pissed off. Yeah, well so am I baby.
I punch in the code for my apartment and notice that Ana stands as far away from me as she possibly can, she still has her arms folded and that pout is as present as ever, I take in her outfit for the first time today as I know she returned to the apartment to change before her appointment with Olivia. She's wearing a white long sleeved sweater and a pair of tight leggings that showcase her amazing ass, those along with the brown heeled boots make her legs appear as if they are going on for fucking ever, and her hair looks amazing, I love it when she has it hanging loose like that I just want to run my fingers through it, she looks hotter than hell but I cant let that distract me. Easier said than done.
The doors are barely open before she's taking off, I'm hot on her tail though, I'm not going to let her rule this one, there is a lot I want to say.
"Stop fucking stomping around like a child, it's starting to piss me off" I say as I shrug my jacket off and throw it onto the breakfast bar.
"I'm pissing you off? Oh how very sorry I am, I didn't realise you were the one that just had to endure your name being dragged through the dirt you fucking ass hole" She reaches for the wine from inside the refrigerator and pours herself a very large glass before chugging half of it down in one go.
"I don't want a drink, thank you for asking" I mutter petulantly as I lean against the bar and watch her, she rolls her eyes and continues to gulp the wine, I would usually berate her for drinking this early in the day but after the afternoon she has had I cant really blame her, and I know I am just making things worse.
"Get your own, and when you do you can start explaining to me why you are so angry at me when I have done nothing wrong"
"I beg to differ Ana" I say without even realising, it's like I'm suffering from word vomit and I can't stop myself from spouting stupid shit like that, her eyes narrow at me as her glass halts in the air inches away from her lips.
"Excuse me? How the fuck have you worked that one out exactly? I didn't ask him to contact the Nooz did I?" I pull the glass from her grasp and pour the remaining wine down the sink, slamming the glass on the draining board but carefully enough so I don't break it.
"He wouldn't have had a story to contact them with if it wasn't for you would he?" Her eyes widen and her jaw nearly hits the floor.
"Fuck you Christian! You are seriously blaming me for this? Our relationship ended years ago, you're acting like a real asshole right now you know"
"How do you expect me to react Ana? I have just had to read the most disgusting filth about my girlfriend fucking guys in cloak room closets and bathrooms for the best part of three years, I'm sorry if I'm not exactly understanding right now"
"It was one guy Christian!" She holds her index finger up to prove her point "One guy that I was in a relationship with, you make me sound like a slut"
"Well if the cap fits" Ohhhh shit. I cannot believe I just said that, and judging by the aghast expression on her face neither can she, her face morphs from anger to hurt and back to anger again and I realise that I have just royally fucked up.
"What did you just say?" I don't answer her, I just lean against the sink as casual as possible when inside I am sweating profusely, I basically just called my girlfriend a slut. What the fuck am I doing?
"Answer me! What did you just say?"
"Ana, don't take that fucking tone with me"
"Don't take that tone! You have just called me a slut you son of a bitch, what the hell do you think you are playing at?!" She turns on her heel and I think she is going to walk away but she just runs her hand through her hair repeatedly and sighs exasperatedly.
"I did not call you a slut Ana stop being dramatic, and stop evading the truth. And what the fuck does that asshole mean when he says he has pictures of you?" I roar at her as I remember what he said, the image of Ana sending nude pictures to this prick invades my mind and I resist the overwhelming urge to drown my body weight in bourbon. She spins around and meets my scorching gaze.
"That wasn't true, I never sent him a picture of me once! He asked but I never did it, because deep down I didn't trust him, do you actually think that little of me?"
"It has nothing to do with what I think Ana it's what I read, do you really think that I want to stand here and re-hash your past like this, it makes me feel physically sick and all I want to do is get my hands on that little weasel and strangle the life out of him. You are mine, do you understand that?"
"Oh don't give me the 'You are mine' bullshit Christian, it's not like you are exactly a virgin, this could have been you in my position a thousand times over" She's not wrong, the difference is that I made my flings sign NDA's, not exactly the most romantic thing to do after sex but I didn't give a shit, I needed to protect myself and I couldn't risk one of them selling a story on me just for a hefty pay out. I never made Ana sign one, I didn't need to. I just trusted her straight away.
"Ana, I'm not trying to be a dick here but you have to see where I am coming from, this is going to reflect badly on me" You think that I would be able to stop myself but no, I just keep on digging this hole deeper and deeper. Anyone got a shovel?
"Are you ashamed of me?" Her eyes widen and I see the pang of hurt that flashes across her face and I immediately feel like a dick. Now she thinks that I am ashamed of her, on top of calling her a slut.
"No, that's not what I mean -"
"Well that's what it sounds like Christian, what are you worried about? That you're family will be disgusted with me, that the conceited, pretentious and egotistical assholes you work with will want nothing more to do with you?" She spits through clenched teeth and I know that I have pushed her too far. I take a step forward and reach my arm out to touch her but she yanks away from me, that hurt like a fucker but I try not to look affected, I know it's pointless though when I see a tear roll down her cheek, my heart breaks to see her cry because of me, not because of Brody or because of Adam but me.
Baby, I'm sorry -" She cuts me off with her hand and glares at me, I decide to shut the fuck up before she rips my heart right out.
"Don't you fucking dare Grey, you think you can insult me like this and expect me to just get over it as soon as you decide to apologise, think again" She pivots on the spot and bends to pick up her purse before making a beeline for the elevator.
"Ana, where are you going?" I follow her and stand behind her as she stabs the call button with force.
"Away from you, don't call me or text me. Just stay away from me Christian" She says flatly as she steps inside the cart.
"Baby please, we need to talk about this"
"I was prepared to talk earlier but you didn't want to, remember? Now I don't want to talk. Leave me alone" The doors close and I can't even move a muscle to stop her, what does she mean leave her alone? Is this her walking away from me? From us? I wouldn't blame her, I have just acted like the worlds biggest insensitive asshole all because I can't control my jealousy issues.
I pull my phone out of my pocket and dial Sawyer's speed dial.
"Miss Steele is leaving the penthouse, follow her" I don't even wait for a reply before I hang up, I'm guessing that she is heading to Kate's. I suddenly remember she has her interview tomorrow and I groan with frustration at myself, I have now pissed her off the day before she faces the biggest interview of her life, just another thing to add to my list of misdemeanours. Perfect.
I pour myself a large glass of bourbon and head to my study, I fire up the Mac and type in Seattle Nooz.
The story is still there larger than life so I can only presume that Taylor is fighting tooth and nail to get it removed, I can't stop myself from re-reading it over and over again despite the lump forming in my throat as I do so, that picture of the two of them will be imprinted in my mind for years to come I just know it.
I cant take my eyes off of Ana, she looks young and happy and care free, she looks like your typical student, jeans and a tight fitting top with her hair hanging in messy waves, she looks exactly the same as she does now but just younger, her eyes are still that amazing shade of blue and I can see that she has always been blessed with a sexy and curvaceous figure, that fucker looks like the cat that got the cream with his filthy hands all over her, did they go back to her room that night and have sex?
Did he fuck her from behind?
Did he fuck her up the wall so he could see her gorgeous tits bouncing in his face?
Or even worse did he make love to her? Did he climb in between her legs and look into her eyes as she fell apart around him? Fuckkkkkkkk!
Before I know it, I have thrown the glass of bourbon across the room so it hit's the wall and smashes to smithereens on the floor, the amber liquid trickling down the wall.
I stand and tug at the ends of my hair roughly whilst screwing my eyes shut, my breathing becomes ragged and laboured and I feel like my chest cavity is closing in on me, all of the emotions that I was feeling when I first read this filth return back to me at full force.
She's mine, she's mine, she's mine.
All I want to do is chase after her but the look on her face just before the elevator doors closed on her comes back to haunt me, she looked so desolate. Like I had just ripped her world from underneath her feet in two split seconds, not that far from the truth really.
She is so precious to me, yet I treated her like a fling that I was ashamed of, I feel nauseous as I replay my words in my head. I didn't even give her a chance to explain herself before I jumped down her throat, blaming her and making her feel like shit. I am one fucking asshole.
I just need to find a way to apologise, I can't lose her over this.
Anastasia's POV
"Are you sure you want to go out tonight Ana? You don't look like you're in the mood" I step into my pumps and check my appearance in the mirror, going out is exactly what I want to do, I need to have a few drinks and dance my troubles away, I refuse to sit in and let Christian fucking Grey get to me. Not a chance in hell.
"For the last time Kate, yes. Since when have you ever passed up on an opportunity to get drunk?" She's sitting on the bed with her legs crossed, she's already dressed in her high waisted shorts and bandeau top but she's eyeing me with uncertainty and hesitation.
"I do when my best friend turns up at my apartment in floods of tears, unable to get a word in edgeways then not even three hours later demanding to go out"
"I was upset and now I'm not, you don't have to come with me you know. I will be fine with Olivia and Mia"
"No way Steele, I need to be there to look after you when you get emotional and reckless" She stands and straightens herself out, fluffing her blonde waves with the tips of her fingers.
"I will not get emotional and reckless Kate" She scoffs and pushes me out into the hallway.
"Whatever you say babe, lets have a drink" I giggle at her contradiction, one minute she's telling me its not a good idea then she's practically forcing drink down my throat.
I phoned Olivia and asked her to be here for nine thirty, typical Liv she didn't even question me. Just asked me what she needed to wear.
Kate asked me if I would mind Mia tagging along with us, she promised her a night out when we were at the Grey's for dinner and they exchanged numbers, I can't say that I really relish the thought of being around my asshole boyfriend's sister for the entire night but I really like Mia, she's sweet and adorable and you can't help but like her.
We've agreed to meet her at Trinity's later, I questioned if I wanted to go back there after all that place holds for me and Brody, but why should I stay away because of painful memories. Brody is in the past and I have to move on, I'm tiring of exes rearing their ugly heads and making themselves known to the point where I am ashamed of stepping foot inside.
"See this is what I mean Ana, every time I look at you you look like you're about to break down at any minute"
"After the day I have had Kate, I think I'm allowed to look a bit pissed off. I'm so humiliated"
"Ana, this is exactly the reaction this prick wanted from you, he wanted you to be bothered and upset why else would he send the story in?" Kate pours two shots of tequila and slices a lemon into two wedges.
"Money, revenge? Who knows. I didn't think he was capable of acting like such a selfish bastard, he was always so sweet when we were together"
"Yeah, until you dumped his ass and never wanted to see him again"
"Oh, thanks Kate. You sound like Christian" I pick up the shot and toss it back in one.
"Hey I didn't mean that, I just mean he is bitter. He lost an amazing, gorgeous catch like you, he is bound to be a bit put out" I roll my eyes and motion for her to pour me another drink. I don't care if I cheated on him with every guy on campus, that doesn't excuse his disgusting behaviour and the way he treated me, I have never felt so dirty and cheap in all my life.
"And as for Christian, I don't see how he can judge you after the amount of women he has screwed over the years"
"Once again, thank you Kate. A wonderful image you have painted for me right there" I swallow the burning liquid once more and slam the glass back on the bar, It's my interview tomorrow morning and I don't want to be hung over but my best friend is really throwing them at me tonight.
"I'm sorry, I'm not really helping am I?"
"No it's fine, you're only saying what I am thinking. He really hurt me tonight Kate" I drop my head to my palm and massage my temples, I haven't been able to get Christian's words out of my head since I walked out on him, he looked at me like I disgusted him, and he has never once spoken to me like that before, I felt like a whore in front of my own boyfriend and that isn't easy to forget.
"I know babe" Kate stretches her hand across the bar and caresses my arm softly "But you need to forget about him tonight okay?" I nod softly and try to attempt a smile, no doubt it looked more like I was constipated but it's a start.
Olivia bounces through the apartment half an hour later looking as beautiful as always, why this girl is still single astounds me.
"Wow, Ana you look seriously hot!" She eyes me up and down and grins when she takes in my outfit, I'm wearing a backless, black and gold sequined long sleeved dress, and I will be the first to admit how indecent it is. It barely covers my ass but I don't care, I purposely chose this dress because somehow I know it will get back to Christian and he will be pissed. Good, he deserves it.
"Is it too slutty?" I already feel like I am starting to slur my words and I know I need to drink some water before we leave, I don't want to get drunk I just want to dance.
"Shut up, you look so sexy it's unreal! Now, where's my drink" She spins on her heel and struts towards the kitchen I search for alcohol, hitting the jackpot when she opens the lower cupboard in the corner.
"Right girls, we need to make a pact. No guy talk tonight, no Christian, no Elliot, no Blake" Kate looks directly at Olivia who just rolls her eyes and continues to blend together what looks like arsenic.
"I agree!" I raise my glass in the air as a salute and drain the remainder of wine, I feel my phone buzz from the spot on the couch next to me, I pick it up and see that it's a text from Christian.
Sawyer tells me you're going out. Please come home so we can talk
Pfft! Fat chance of that happening Grey, you can't just click your fingers this time.
No. As you have just said, I'm going out.
Not even one minute later my phone alerts me to his reply.
You have your interview in the morning, you don't want a hangover on the most important day of your life.
Patronising ass!
Not that it is any of your business, but I don't intend on drinking much. I'm not an idiot. Now please leave me alone.
I stash my cell back into my clutch and toss it on the sofa without even bothering to wait for his reply, he can wait.
"I hope that wasn't a guy Anastasia Rose Steele!" Kate yells at me as she stands to her feet, I note that it's with a slight wobble.
"Just getting rid of him for the night, now lets drink whatever shit Olivia is making and get out of here"
"Arghhhhhh you all look so amazing!" I once again catch an exuberant Mia before she sends me on my ass once we walk into the entrance of Trinity, the club is as heaving as always and I can already feel my feet beginning to itch, I can't wait to dance.
"So do you! Mia this is Olivia, Kate and I's best friend!" I shout over the music and pull Olivia alongside me so that I can introduce her.
We manoeuvre ourselves through the crowds and spot an empty booth in the far corner of the bar, I order a pitcher of water with my wine so that I can alternate between the two, I have waited what feels like a lifetime for this shot and I don't want to mess it up by being a rotten mess.
"Are you okay? I spoke to Christian before I came out and he sounded like shit, I get the impression that you two have had some sort of fight" I'm confused, has Mia not seen the Nooz website today?
"Have you not seen it?" She sips her wine and tilts her head before turning to face me.
"I heard about the article if that's what you mean, but I haven't read it. My friend Lily told me about it and tried to tell me what it said but I didn't want to know, it's none of my business Ana and I don't want you to think I am nosey" I cant help but tear up as she speaks, even though the music is blaring I can still hear her soft tone and it soothes me no end, this is what I wanted Christian to say to me earlier. I wanted him to understand and not judge me, instead he berates me like a child and makes me feel like a worthless piece of shit.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you" Mia pulls me into a hug and that's when I realise that I am crying, fuck I haven't even been here ten minutes yet!
"You haven't! You've done anything but Mia, thank you for understanding" She gently wipes my eyes and smiles at me.
"Hey, we've all had disgruntled exes in our time. Some of them are just bigger pricks than others!" I cant help but laugh, that is the perfect way of putting it.
"You okay Steele?" Kate asks as she sits beside me, she knows I've been crying. She always knows.
"I'm fine, I just had a minute!"
"And don't worry about my brother, I know better than anyone how he can be, he doesn't think before he speaks!" You're telling me!
"Hey, we said no guy talk remember!"
"I know, I know. I'm just being silly I'm sorry" I wipe my eyes and take a deep breath.
"That's my girl, I have something that will cheer you up"
"What?"
"Elliot fired Cassidy" She beams and I can tell straight away how happy this makes her, I don't blame her. I wouldn't want my boyfriend working with someone he used to fuck either.
"Why?"
"He didn't really elaborate, he just said that she wasn't working out anymore. I'm just happy she has gone"
"Cassidy? Elliot's assistant?" Mia asks as she sips her wine, reclining back into the booth sofa and crossing her legs.
"Yeah, the slutty assistant that had no fucking morals" Kate seethes as she twirls her hair around her finger.
"I heard she got fired because she was into drugs" What?!
"Where did you hear that?" Kate shoots up and practically knocks me out as she tries to get closer to Mia.
"I overheard Elliot talking to my Dad last night, he said she got her ass involved with drugs and became unreliable" Mia shrugs her shoulders like it's no big deal. This is huge!
"Why didn't Elliot tell me that?"
"Because he probably doesn't want to talk about her to you Kate, he knows you're not her biggest fan" She scoffs and nods her head.
"True, but oh my god! I knew she was a skank but drugs! That girl seriously has no class!" Here, here.
"Tequilaaaaaaaaaaa!" Olivia sings as she approaches the table with a tray full of shots. Oh fuck, I think I'm gunna' need another water pitcher.
Christian's POV
"What is she doing now Sawyer?" I bark down the phone, I have been getting hourly reports from Sawyer about Ana now I know she is at the club, I'm going crazy holed up here not knowing what she is doing.
"She's dancing with her friends Sir" Dancing. My mind flits back to the first night I met, her when I watched her dancing with Olivia and Kate from the overhead balcony, she looked so alluring and sexy moving to the music and I knew right there and then that she was going to be trouble. I know all the assholes will be eye fucking her within an inch of her life and that only pisses me off further, I'm not there to protect her and it's driving me insane.
"Don't let her out of your sight. Is she drunk?"
"She doesn't appear to be Sir, she has been drinking water at regular intervals" That's my girl.
"Good. Don't let her drink much more. Keep me informed" I hang up and swallow the remainder of the bourbon, I have drank far more than I usually do but right now I need it, it's numbing and I couldn't be numb enough at this moment in time.
Mia sent me a picture of Ana posing with Kate and Olivia and my heart stopped beating. She looked so fucking amazing in that dress I nearly stopped breathing, once I had gotten over the shock rage bubbled up inside me. I could practically see her fucking underwear it was that short, I don't doubt for a minute that she has done this to piss me off, she knows Sawyer will be reporting back to me but I don't think she was betting on Mia ratting her out. Well, to be fair she didn't rat her out she was more like showing me what an amazing thing I had. The picture came attached with a message -
Don't be an asshole. Make this right
I know I'm being an asshole but I don't know how to make it right. She has every right to pissed at me, I hurt her and I insulted her beyond belief. But I fucking hate not having control over this situation right now.
Taylor demanded that the article was to be removed from the website which of course caused an uproar. The pricks demanded twenty thousand dollars as the story had already been released, well no fucking shit Sherlock!
I would have paid any amount of money to ensure that this god damn piece was taken down, twenty thousand dollars means nothing to me where as my girl's reputation means everything.
I want to text her and tell her but she told me to leave her alone, now usually I would laugh and march over to her apartment, throw her over my shoulder and bring her back here, demanding that she talk to me and stop dismissing me. But I'm scared if I do that I will push her away for good.
So I'll just wait, and wait, and wait. Until I can sort this shit out once and for all and get my girlfriend back.
"I won't lie to you Christian, you acted like a real jackass" Elliot kicks his legs up and sprawls out all over my couch, leaning his head on his elbow and taking a swig of his beer.
"I fucking know Elliot you don't have to tell me that"
"I'm sorry but seriously, what were you thinking? How do you think she would have felt if it was one of your bimbos writing into that trashy rag. Something tells me that she wouldn't have blown her top like you did" I will seriously hit this dick in the minute, I thought he was here to make me feel better?
"Elliot, this woman makes me practically insane with jealousy, I can't even stand it when men so much as look at her, reading this was like a punch in the gut. It doesn't exactly leave a lot to the imagination" He looks at me and nods like he understands, not that he does. Him and Kate have been openly fucking other people for along as they have known each other, I know my Brother loves her but he will never feel the possessiveness that I feel for Ana, she's mine and only mine. No one can have her.
"I get it bro, but there are better ways of going about it. I mean Christ calling her a slut?" Elliot whistles through his teeth as I shake my head. Not one of my finest moments.
"I didn't actually call her that"
"You said, 'if the cap fits' that's basically saying "Hey, you said it sweetheart but I'm not going to disagree with you" He's right, of course he's fucking right. I was a royal dickhead and I have some serious ass kissing to do.
"Alright shut up, you're not helping here you're just making things worse" I pick the corner of the sticker on my beer bottle mindlessly. I should be making love to my girlfriend right now, but instead I'm sat here with this baboon drowning my sorrows.
"Okay let's talk about more pressing matters then. Brody for example" I roll my eyes and groan, I really didn't want to think about my former best friend turned drug addict right now.
"What about him?"
"What's he doing? You still got your guys on him?"
"Of course, he hasn't been seen near Cassidy's apartment but there have been a number of different people coming and going from his place. It doesn't take a genius to guess what they're doing there" Elliot sits up and slams his bottle down on the coffee table.
"Fuck, so that means he is still snorting that shit. Fuck Christian why didn't you tell me?"
"Because I knew you would act like this, what did you really expect though Elliot? It's not like he would just stop just because you took away his primary source from him. There are other ways" I say flatly but inside I'm breaking in two, I was really hoping that this would be a one off and that he would knock it on the head. Turns out I was wrong.
"Well we need to pull our fingers out of our fucking asses and do something, he needs our help" Elliot is glaring at me like I am the one to blame.
"Don't look at me like that, I have already told you that we have to tread carefully with this, we can't ambush him"
"I'm starting to get past the caring stage now Christian, I don't want to wait anymore, it could be too late before we decide to finally do something"
"This isn't about you Elliot, Ana needs to know before we do anything" I have come to the realisation that Ana has a right to know, I am still refusing to let her anywhere near him but she should still know. As much as it sickens me to say it, he was her boyfriend at one point.
"Well can you get a fucking jolly on with that please, the quicker Ana knows the quicker we can take action" I am about to reply when I am interrupted by my phone ringing, it's Sawyer.
"What's happening? Is she okay?"
"Sir, I think you should know that I have just dropped Miss Steele and her friends off at her apartment. Davenport is driving Miss Grey back to Bellevue"
"Is she okay?" Sawyer pauses and I start to panic.
"I have advised her to drink plenty of water, she should be fine" Fuck, so that means she's drunk.
"What about her friends?"
"Slightly worse for wear Sir" I am already pulling my leather jacket on and searching for my keys, I need to go and check on her, if she's drunk she needs Advil and water. And by the sounds of it Kate and Olivia are in no fit state to look after her.
"I'm on my way, stay stationed outside until I arrive" I hang up and pull my shoes on.
"What's wrong, where are you going?" Elliot asks from his spot on the couch.
"Kate's. They're all smashed so I'm going round there. You coming?" He doesn't answer me he just follows me to the elevator and steps in with me.
Once I pull up outside I instruct Sawyer to head back to Escala, I tell him that I will be staying the night so he doesn't need to stay. That is if Ana even lets me stay, I really haven't thought this through properly.
We both walk to the door and I knock firmly three times, if they were asleep that was bound to have woken them up.
Kate answers looking like pure shit, her hair is all over the place and her face resembles a panda, her mascara smudged all the way down to her cheeks.
"You okay babe?" Elliot asks as he leans against the door frame.
"You fucking woke me up so no. What do you want?"
"Where's Ana?" I don't piss about getting to the point.
"She's changing, why are you here?" She narrows her gaze at me and if looks could kill I would be dead right now.
"I need to see her, so are you going to let us in?"
She sighs and spins on her heel, marching off in the direction of Ana's room and banging loudly on the door before disappearing into her own room with Elliot following. I notice that Olivia is passed out on the couch, still in her barely there outfit complete with sky high heels, I actually bend down to check she is still breathing because she looks like a corpse right now.
"She's fine, she always looks like that after too much to drink" My head snaps up as I hear the angelic voice from beside me, angelic but tinged with malice.
Fuck! She's standing in the middle of the room dressed in her pyjamas, a black silk cami set with shorts that accentuate her perfect legs, I can see the swell of her breasts and her nipples are slightly peeking through the thin material of the top, I feel my cock come to life but I will it to stay down. I don't think she will appreciate any horny advances from me right now.
Her hair is still hanging in loose waves and she hasn't got a spec of make up on, she must have been getting ready for bed and she looks so incredibly beautiful. This is when I crave her the most, when she is natural and vulnerable to me, she is such a natural beauty and there's nothing I love more than seeing her soft, creamy skin on show just for me.
"Ana…" I can't even string a sentence together right now, I thought I would have this all figured out but I don't. She has her arms folded and her whole posture screams closed and cold, she is looking at me without breaking eye contact but her eyes look so lifeless, she isn't looking at me like I am her sole reason for breathing, she is looking at me with disappointment and discontent.
"If you have came here to apologise you can save it, I don't want to hear it" She breezes past me and makes her way to the kitchen, opening the cupboard and standing on her tip toes to reach for what likes the Advil.
I try, I really try to not look at her ass but it's damn near impossible when she is leaning like that, I can see the curve of her cheeks and I have to close my eyes and turn my head just to break the trance that she puts me in.
"I have come here to apologise actually, Ana I'm so sorry. I should have never spoken to you the way I did. I was just angry and you took the brunt of it" She turns and leans against the counter as she swallows the pills with a glass of water, at least she doesn't look too drunk.
"Do you have any idea how much you hurt me Christian?" She says so softly that I barely hear her, my stomach drops. I know I hurt her.
"I'm so sorry baby, I've been an ass I know that. I don't blame you if you hate me right now" I say as I hang my head in shame, I hear her scoff and the snort of a giggle.
"I don't hate you, you idiot. I just don't like you very much right now, you were so horrible to me today"
"I know, I just couldn't control myself and I will never forgive myself for the things that I said to you, you didn't deserve the awful things I said"
"No I didn't" She sighs again and rubs her temples with her fingers "I'm tired Christian, can we talk about this in the morning please" She doesn't give me a chance to answer, she walks to her bedroom and I give in to the urge to follow her.
"Ana, I think we should talk about this now don't you? We have a lot to discuss" She pulls back the bed covers and clambers in, leaning against the headboard and scrubbing her face against her hands.
"I'm too tired Christian, I drank more than I should have and I have my interview tomorrow, I just want to sleep" I stand awkwardly at the side of her bed not really knowing what to do, do I just leave?
"Are you going to stand there all night or are you coming to bed?" She says as she pulls back the other side of the sheet. She wants me to stay?
"What?"
"You heard me, are you coming or not?" She cocks her eyebrow at me. I hesitantly kick my shoes off and peel my jacket off, followed my by shirt and jeans until I am left in my boxers, I see her eyes rake me up and down but she quickly turns her head away, I smirk to myself. Even when she's angry she is still affected by me.
I climb into bed as she shuffles down, turning onto her side and facing the opposite direction, it looks I am literally getting the cold shoulder then.
I lie down and stare at the ceiling, she flicks the nightstand light off plunging the room into darkness, I can hear her heavy breathing and I know she is still awake. I carefully turn on to my side so I am facing her back and slowly place my hand on her arm, rubbing my thumbs in gentle circles.
"I'm so fucking sorry baby" I whisper in the dark. After what feels like an age I hear her soft reply.
"I know" She shifts slightly so that she is pressed into my chest and I take that as my cue, I wrap my arms around her warm body and pull her flush against me, I bury my nose in her hair and inhale her perfect scent.
"You're still an ass" I smile slightly as I didn't hear an ounce of contempt in that sentence.
"I know, such a fucking ass. I don't know why you put up with me"
"Because I love you. Even though you're an ass" I pull her even closer to me and hold her close to me, kissing her neck softly, I hear her breathing slow and I know that she is moments away from falling asleep.
"I love you too, sleep now baby"
A/N - I'm so sorry for the wait! Life caught up with me!
So don't think that Ana has forgiven Christian because she hasn't, she has just thawed a bit.
Coming up - Ana's interview with SIP, the article fall out continued, and more Brody Drama - I think it's time for that to heat up don't you? ;)
Visuals at pinterestdotcom / fifty shades 12 / forbidden lust (Remove spaces)
I will also be answering reviews in the next chapter, I have just had no time to do so yet! Please review x
(All mistakes are mine)