The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy

By Winter Knight

Chapter 21: "Our friends are in danger, Enter Hoss Delgado: Spectral Exterminator!"

A/N: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy nor "That Grim Show" but the OCs are mine.

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Last time, the Eds discover they have a new principal in their school, none other than the benevolent head vampire Baron Von Ghoulish and he planned to take them to a amusement park but because Kevin fired a huge spitball that damaged the bleachers, the school is now able to afford a trip to the Museum of Natural History which there is one built in Peach Creek. However little did they realize, they are being followed by a mysterious stranger with a metal hand.

In the Museum, Von Ghoulish counted out who is in the group, which in order are Ed, Edd, Eddy, Grim, Nazz, Rolf, Jimmy, Johnny, Lizzy, Sara, Lee, Marie, May, and Kevin. And he decides to show everyone around on a tour but then Eddy gets a funny Idea and drags Ed, Double D, Grim, and Lizzy into it.

As Johnny wondered where Lizzy went he bumps into somebody in front of him, the man had long hair and an eye patch, he looked and dressed like someone who "Escaped from New York" but has a metal hand. The stranger says to Johnny "Hello little boy, I'm Hoss Delgado! Spectral Exterminator, I hunt down things that go bump in the night like Glen Quagmire and stuff only kids like you see in nightmares and I'm gonna ask you one thing... HAVE YOU SEEN THIS BEING? (holds a picture of Grim and the Eds) and Johnny says, "wow, I didn't know Kevin would be evil enough to send a hitman to go after Eddy!" and Hoss says "NO! I mean the hooded skeleton being" and then Johnny replies, "OH, you mean the lumberjack! I last saw him being dragged by Eddy to another room." Hoss then runs off and he says, "Nice kid but lacks smarts, now to put an end to that monster!"

Meanwhile Eddy says, "Hey guys, wanna see something cool? Hey Bonehead! Use your magic to make these Dinosaurs dance! And then Grim says, "What do you think I am? a trained monkey! Well here goes nothing" and so he used his scythe to zap the dinosaurs but they suddenly appear to wear makeup and started to sing and dance...

"It's just a jump to the left.

And then a step to the right.

With your hands on your hips.

You bring your knees in tight.

But it's the pelvic thrust

That really drives you insane.

Let's do the time-warp again.

Let's do the time-warp again!"

As Hoss finally find then he is shocked at what he's seeing and says "He's raising an unholy army of singing transvestite dinosaurs! He's going down like a clown! Charlie Brown!" and then Grim is ambushed by Hoss who turns his hand into a crossbow that fires chainsaws but Grim easily dodges him, Grim tries to strike back but Hoss smacks the scythe from his hand and tries to slice him with his chainsaw hand but then one of the dancing dinosaurs accidentally kicked Hoss into a wax statue of Lady Godiva and he says "Oh sorry lady! And you should get some clothes on!" while Eddy just stares and drools at it and then Lizzy hits him with a mallet from hammerspace and says, "Get your mind out of the gutter Eddy!"

Hoss then grabs Grim by the cloak and puts him in a chokehold and slams him to the ground, Hoss then climbs up a pole and jumps off from it and suddenly Fred Fredburger runs in the middle saying "ED! YOU FORGOT YOUR LUNCH! YES!" and then Hoss accidentally lands on Fred and says, "It's a strange elephant creature, it must be destroyed! And then Fred says, "Want nachos?" and then Hoss says "thank you elephant guy (eats some) now to destroy you! and then Lizzy goes up to him and says "Mr. Ash guy, can you please leave my friends alone?" and then he noticed her fangs and Double D covers the part of the fanfic where I describe Hoss points his laser cannon hand to her head because it sounds cold.

Baron Von Ghoulish then appears with May and Nazz and says, "Not so fast you ruffian! One minute I hear things breaking and I thought it was Eddy at first. But I can't have you just make the MoNH into the WWE!" and then Hoss points the cannon at Von Ghoulish and says "Vampires, Skeletons and green elephants are a menace to this town and you must be exterminated and then May yells out "DON'T YOU DARE! THEY HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING!" then the action stops and then May covers her mouth and runs away crying.

Nazz says "dude, what is your problem and why do you want to destroy our friends?" and then Hoss introduces himself to the others "I'm Hoss Delgado! Spectral Exterminator, I hunt down paranormal beings that are a menace to this world and I got to rescue those 3 boys from the Grim Reaper and now I find 2 vampires and a green elephant." and then Ed says "But I thought non-supernatural adults can't be seen in our world, how on earth did you appear in this story?"

(Hoss has a flashback where he appears in me and Emma's pagoda and he points a gun cannon at my head saying "I'm a popular character from "that Grim show" and I demand you write me into your story!" and I say "but you're an adult and adults can't be seen on Ed, Edd, n Eddy! Emma help me!" and Emma says "But I wanted Hoss to appear too!" and then I said "Traitor! and besides Hoss you're not supernatural like Nergal and Dracula" and Hoss says "umm my metal fist has supernatural powers" and then I say to him "well that's good enough!" and he leaves)

Nazz then says "well first off the Eds are not Grim's hostages...Grim is their hostage but they haven't told me how did it happen in the first place, second Lizzy is a Dhampire (a daywalker). Fred Fredburger isn't a menace, he's just cute and I seem to be the only one who notices him with May Kanker (Fred makes a sweatdrop) and he maybe a head vampire but Baron Von Ghoulish is really a nice guy like Lizzy's grandpa!"

Hoss says "well this is a very awkward situation, well sorry to bother you kids and congratulations on keeping Grim in check!" and then Grim grabs Hoss and says, "WAIT MON! AREN'T YOU GONNA SEND ME BACK TO THE UNDERWORLD! I CAN'T STAND THOSE THREE! (gets whacked by Nazz and Lizzy)" and then Hoss says "no can do skeleton guy, besides I got info that Ember McLain is performing in Canada...IT'S GO TIME!" and then Eddy hides in a suit of armor just by hearing that name.

After Hoss leaves, Von Ghoulish tells the others to join the other students in the tour and try to find May while he cleans up the mess Grim and Hoss made during the misunderstanding.

(Meanwhile in Canada)

Oh, Ember, you will remember!
Ember, one thing remains!
Oh, Ember, so warm and tender!
You will remember m...

Ember is performing in a theater in Canada and she's wearing a Canadian Mountie hat, her concert gets interrupted by Hoss with a laser cannon blast. She sees Hoss and says "So Hoss Delgado, we meet again!" and then Hoss says "I won't go easy on you like we did back in Maui!" and so the 2 fought for a long time but it ends with Ember bald and Hoss covered in band-aids, before Ember vanishes she says "I'll be back for you Hoss Del-dipstick! And I'll get that loud mouthed kid too!" and then Hoss says, "This won't be the last I'll see of her, and those 3 boys and Grim!

THE END...for now!