A/N: Thanks so much for the reviews and sorry for the long wait. This is a pretty light chapter, maybe a foreshadowing of the darker times that are going to come in future chapters *cough*

I had a great time writing this chapter and grounding their new found relationship. Harry is as clueless as ever and Draco is still his persuasive self. Enjoy.

Chapter Twenty-One

Confessions

When Draco woke up, he found Harry nowhere to be seen and his sheets half-pulled out of the mattress. He followed the trail slowly; for some reason, it was dragged onto the other side of the bed. His brain was still fuzzy from sleep, trying hard as it was to work it all out. He reached the side of the bed and peeked over the edge, wondering what to make of what he was seeing. Harry's body was sprawled uncomfortably on the floor and he was fast asleep, his mouth half open.

"Harry," whispered Draco, perplexed.

"Mm?" Mumbled Harry.

"You're on the floor," he stated in a blank tone.

"Mm," mumbled Harry again, still mostly asleep.

"Harry!" Draco hissed. He was leaning over Harry, unsure of what was going on. He tried to reach out to Harry through their mental bond. He envisioned shaking him softly. His hands hovered over the unresponsive body, wondering whether or not he should really shake Harry.

"I'm awake, I'm awake," grumbled Harry, raising a hand to rub his eye. He yawned tiredly. "Morning."

"Morning," replied Draco impatiently.

Harry frowned and slowly lifted himself up on his elbows. He looked at Draco confusedly. "What am I doing on the floor?"

Draco raised his eyebrows at him questioningly.

"Guess I fell," shrugged Harry sleepily, still not really ready to wake up. He threw his pillow back onto the bed and crawled up after it, forcing Draco backwards.

"Is that something you do a lot?"

"No," replied Harry slowly. When it became clear that Draco was waiting for more explanations, he added, "I guess I'm not used to sharing a bed with someone."

"Don't be ridiculous," chimed Draco. "You must have slept next to someone some time. Spent the night with them or something. Over a friend's house at a sleepover? A relative's?"

Harry shook his head mutely. Nothing was coming back to him.

Draco's smile was first hesitant but soon turned very wide, his eyebrows still raised high. He'd never met anyone quite so… innocent. Harry scowled and got up from the bed, knowing exactly how inexperienced he was being portrayed in Draco's eyes. He turned away from Draco, linking his hands together and raising them high.

Draco sat back in the middle of his bed and watched Harry stretch with interest. When Harry refused to glance back at him, Draco started throwing apologies at him telepathically. Finally Harry slumped back against the bed, worn out.

"Okay, okay!" He grumbled. "I got it."

Draco snaked his hand over Harry's, drawing circles over it. He was thinking of the blue smoky patterns Harry had done on him yesterday and felt a pang of jealousy at not being able to draw the same patterns over Harry's hands.

Feeling the yearning in him, Harry rested his free hand over Draco's gingerly and closed his eyes, trying to run his own magic through Draco's hand. After a moment or two, he heard Draco gasp. Through their bond, he could feel the tingles running up and down Draco's palm and fingers. The shining blue energy was drifting out of Draco's fingertips, drawing visible circles over Harry's hand. The lines were shakier and the colour was more faded than Harry's usual one, but both of them were smiling excitedly, feeling closer together as a result of sharing his magic. Harry felt a strange attraction towards Draco that he hadn't really felt before. He wanted to get even closer to him.

When his hand started to feel numb and he remembered the warnings he'd been continuously given about not exhausting his magic, he withdrew his hand reluctantly, lingering it over Draco's hand just a moment longer, sending goose bumps through both of them.

"Good dreams?" Purred Draco tentatively after a long silence.

"Don't remember," confessed Harry, raking a hand through his hair. He found a nervousness biting at him and had to wonder why for a few moments before remembering the discussion of the night before.

"Er," he started, knowing that Draco was on the same page. "Listen, about last night… I know I said I'd give it a shot-"

Draco cut him off mid-sentence with a sharp look, letting Harry feel everything that he wanted to say in opposition. He could see that Draco would say them out loud any way, wanting them to be real and solid and out there, not a passing thought or a feeling that comes and goes in a flash; something more permanent and dependable. It was such a rollercoaster ride. He simply wasn't ready to commit to anything right now. It wouldn't be fair to Draco to lead him on.

"Look," he said awkwardly. "You don't have to say anything. I know how you feel, but I'm not ready for all of this yet. I hadn't really thought it through. It was unfair of me to give you unrealistic hope, and I'm sorry, but nothing you say will change this. I'm not ready for a relationship."

"Wait," said Draco sourly after hearing the uncertainty in Harry's voice. "You're not ready for a relationship with anyone, or just with a guy?"

"With anyone," said Harry as he looked at Draco pleadingly. "I'm trying to wrap my head around my life as it is and maintaining a relationship with anyone would be hard."

"You don't have to hide it. I can see that me being a guy does make you feel awkward," said Draco grudgingly.

"Well, I can't really help that, can I?" complained Harry. "Didn't you feel awkward your first time? It's not like I can wake up one morning and decide I'm gay. It's a process. Not having access to my memories makes it that much harder."

"It didn't seem to bother you before," said Draco pointedly, thinking back to when Harry had watched him naked and found pleasure in it.

Harry bit his lower lip and flushed, looking away. "Look, that's not the issue right now. I'm not ready for a relationship, not yet. Maybe in a few months when I feel more settled into my new life."

Draco stayed silent for a long while, searching Harry's eyes. "Just listen to what I have to say, okay?"

Harry nodded half-heartedly and sighed deeply, dropping his head. He could sense how hard it was for Draco to admit to his feelings out loud and was secretly curious to hear what he had to say; how he would go about confessing his feelings when he usually conveyed them silently or through their mental bond.

"When you woke up after five years," Draco started softly. "Five years, Harry; my life became even more of a mess. You may not remember our past, but I do, and it's very complicated to say the least. It's always ended up hurting one or both of us. We were bonded together through hate and pain and death. By broken promises and expectations to live up to. It's wasn't a story that made much sense, but it was our life. We shared the experiences. We bore witness to the deaths. We suffered through the pain. We survived.

"But as long as I was cut off from the world under this barrier, locked away in my room if I wasn't out somewhere trying to forget myself, then I could pretend that it hadn't been my life. I could pretend to have lived a better life, to have had a normal and happy childhood."

Draco went silent, looking away from Harry. Harry sat back awkwardly, giving him time. He wanted to wrap his arms around Draco and erase all of the pain away, some of which he himself had caused. A small part of him wondered when he'd grown so protective of Draco.

Last night, His mind answered him. The time and words which you're trying so hard to dismiss right now.

"But then you woke up," continued Draco, still looking at his hands. "And brought my flimsy pretence crashing down. Except there was something very wrong. You couldn't remember a thing. All of that pain and misery of our shared past, and I had to bear it on my own. I felt so betrayed."

Harry placed a hand on Draco's clenched fist, remembering his own frustration when he'd felt betrayed by Draco.

"But then you showed me that it could be a chance at a new start, a new friendship with a clean slate. I was glad, but always waiting for the other shoe to drop. I was used to us fighting and hurting one another," Draco explained apologetically, glancing at Harry and then away.

"After nothing seemed to go right with out newfound friendship, I was so thrown by you, thinking that I couldn't do anything right and that it would be better for us both if we had some space for a while, that I more than pulled away from you. I thought our friendship was unbalanced, that I was giving more than you were."

Draco took a minute to breathe. Harry started to draw the same blue circles of last night over Draco's fingers, mesmerised by their shining light. His magic running through Draco had felt amazing. He had felt as one with him, as though they were compatible and so close together that he'd never have to endure anything on his own ever again. He didn't want space from Draco anymore; he wanted to stay reassuringly close.

"You know what happened after that. I walked in on you laughing with Mother." Draco went quiet again, not able to put his feelings into words. Harry squeezed his hand understandingly. "You were so completely happy without me."

And I was utterly miserable without you, Draco thought the words he could not bear to say.

I was pretty miserable too, confessed Harry, showing Draco glimpses of how hollow he had felt.

Draco cringed, looking into emerald-green eyes. I didn't know.

Harry gave him a sad smile, feeling the old wound in him open up and burn through him. He wasn't aware of how much he'd been hurting. His past, limited as it was, was filled with memories of loneliness and giving up things unwillingly and feeling lost. The only times he'd felt remotely content had been the times he'd spent with Shabby, Narcissa, Snape and Draco. Just smiling at him, Draco was able to drive away all of his negative feelings and make him see the cup half full. He wanted to hold onto Draco and never let go. He didn't want them to fight like that ever again. He'd never been so miserable.

"So I threw the promises of waiting for you to the wind and thought I'd give being happy without you a shot too," whispered Draco. "And I failed miserably."

Harry sighed and looked down on the blue patterns twisting on Draco's pale fingers. So here we are.

"Yes, here we are." Draco grinned, trying to fight the gloomy atmosphere that had settled over them. "So don't tell me about taking back what you said last night, Harry. We've come this far. Don't be a quitter. And I won't break any more promises."

Harry looked up at Draco, caught off-guard. He'd woken up today on the floor, not even able to spend a night sleeping besides Draco, and told himself that he should take back whatever he'd told Draco the night before; his excuse being that exhaustion had made him light-headed and promising things he shouldn't have. But here was Draco, building on Harry's promises instead of letting him tear them down.

He couldn't fight the blush away. Deep down, he'd really wanted Draco to do this.

Draco's grin widened and Harry blushed harder, knowing that the reason Draco had given his big speech was in fact due to the deep and not-so-well hidden desire bubbling inside of him.

He looked into the stormy grey eyes that he'd come to know so well. How had it come to this? He wondered if his choice in the matter would have differed had he still been the old him, buried under all the spiteful memories of hurt and desolation that Draco had talked about. Would he have been able to rise above it? Or would he have made as many mistakes as Draco was admitting to?

He was comforted by the soft hand lying inviting under his own and knew that if he'd been the old him, Draco wouldn't act so freely around him. It pained him to think back to the closed-off Draco that he'd first met when he'd woken up. He loved playing with Draco's soft fingers or resting his head on his lap or having any other kind of connection. It was reassuring to know that Draco would always be beside him and that he enjoyed the fact as much as Harry did. If he was to call this off and crawl back awkwardly to the friendship zone again, there wouldn't be any more of this. He wouldn't be able to sit this close or listen to him breathe or lose himself in those grey eyes that went on forever. There would be no more contact, no more mental bonds or having someone to share a secret joke or smile with; because every time he'd look at Draco he would feel the ache of not being with him, the joke or smile completely forgotten. It would just be him against the world.

In that moment, he was absolutely sure that he'd never want to go back from here. He was so used to being near Draco and sharing every thought with him that somehow they seemed to have become a couple without him realising it. Maybe it was because Draco was his safe place now, or that he'd finally come to fully forgive him, but now he had the deep yearning to never let Draco go; to go to sleep snuggled next to him and wake up in a tangle of limbs.

It seemed almost surreal that he was actually allowed to do all of this. One step forward and he'd be with Draco. He could lie on Draco's stomach and read a book or be on the other side of the Manor from him and still feel just as connected.

He looked at Draco with eyes filled with endless scenarios while Draco gave him time and space to think it through. Harry could feel the warm buzz of his presence just outside his mind, waiting anxiously for an answer. He didn't really have to think about what happened next. His eyes lingered on Draco's lips for a moment before he leaned in and pressed his own lips against them. He felt Draco catch his breath and a nervous smile widened his lips as he leaned back again. Draco closed the distance between them and returned the kiss with a smouldering fire that melted Harry's insides. He gasped, feeling light-headed and very strange.

Draco broke the kiss and looked at him with feverish eyes, raising a hand to tuck a black lock of hair behind his ears. Harry could have sworn that wherever Draco's fingers touched, his skin sizzled and felt chilly at the same time.

Feeling everything that Harry was feeling, a sinister smile twisted Draco's lips and he trailed his finger over the side of Harry's cheek and down onto his neck. Harry's eyes closed on their own accord and he felt his lips part, lost in sensation. A moment later Draco's finger was tracing his bottom lip and Harry couldn't help but dart his tongue forward and taste the tip of his finger. Before he knew what had happened, Draco's eager lips had replaced his finger and they were kissing again.

After his whole world was turned upside down many times over, Harry finally paused for breath and to remember what they had been discussing before. Realising that he'd just agreed to going out with Draco, a hesitant smile lit up his face and he received a very warm one in return.

He was still terrified of what he was getting himself into however, and was counting on the questions Draco had promised to answer about this whole relationship thing.

"Hey, I'm no expert at it either," reassured Draco. "I can't promise there'll be no fighting for example, because I'm always right and you're not."

"Well, then I can't promise not to get revenge when you do turn out to be right," grinned Harry, feeling the awkwardness slip away.

Nothing really had to change between them. He could still be himself around Draco, and that was what mattered most to him.

Everything seemed so much simpler and more enjoyable now that he was hanging out with Draco again. There seemed to be endless possibilities laid out in front of them. He knew that the feeling was definitely mutual every time that Draco looked at him with bright eyes or a dazzling smile or the goose bumps they both felt when their hands brushed against each other.

xXx

"How do you deep throat?" Asked Harry one day out of the blue.

Draco had too much restraint to jump or start coughing, but he did look at Harry in a baffling way for a while, at a loss for words.

"You said you'd answer my questions!" Objected Harry, feeling let down.

It had been a couple of weeks since they'd decided to give being together a chance and by now Harry felt comfortable enough to finally discuss the sexual part of the relationship, the part that scared and at the same time drew him in the most. As he really didn't have a clue or memories he could use, he wasn't going to go in unprepared. An exasperated Draco looked back at his defiant boyfriend and grinned maliciously, sending various pictures and emotions of his deep-throating experiences towards Harry who immediately set up a wall in his mind to bounce the rather taunting images back at Draco.

"No, I want an explanation, not images and feelings," he declared.

"You want me to explain it by words alone?" Draco asked bemusedly. "Why don't I just demonstrate?"

"Words alone," repeated Harry, not even blushing. He was going to do this; he'd already made his mind up about it. They'd been through the basics with him blushing furiously and Draco grinning wickedly. It felt great to be able to finally talk about it with a straight face.

"It's pretty extreme, Harry," Draco said calmly. "We're still at the cuddling stage. I don't think you really need to know all of this just yet."

"Does that mean you don't know how to explain it?" Teased Harry.

Draco gave him a hard look. He exhaled deeply, wondering what he'd gotten himself into, promising Harry answers. His questions were never-ending.

"You have to angle your head right," he started, caving in to Harry's demanding look.

xXx

"Because you can't remember what treacle tart tastes like!" Cried Draco. "And you haven't had any for five years… no, probably even longer than that!"

Harry growled at the spoonful of soup in his hand and brought it up higher. He wrinkled his nose at how creamy it smelled, his stomach already churning.

This is a bad idea, He moaned. Why can't I stick to the nourishment potions?

"I've told you why!" Snapped Draco. Stop buying yourself more time. You're not getting out of this. Three spoons a day! Eat! It's not poison.

"It may as well be," Grumbled Harry. "Has the same effects on me, doesn't it?"

He looked pleadingly at Snape, who was looking at Draco and him in confusion. Harry didn't have to be able to hear his thoughts to know that Snape could see half of their conversation was being carried out telepathically and that he was still somehow expected to fill in the blanks and take part in it.

Harry bit back his laughter. Communicating with Draco this way had become second nature to him, but it frustrated other people, mainly Snape, to no end. He caught Draco's stern stare and all the amusement left him, the misery of the situation settling back in. Feeling deep down that he should oblige, he forced the spoon inside his mouth, expecting his nausea to rise. A wave of it rolled over him weakly after he swallowed it down. It's not unbearable, he reflected.

He downed the other two spoons and sat back in his chair, his nose still wrinkled, but otherwise feeling very proud of himself. That is, until Draco beamed at him and clapped him on the back, bringing out the hiccoughs. A look of horror passed on Harry's features and settled on Draco's when the motion proved to be too much and Harry bent over the bin, strategically situated next to his chair, gagging uncontrollably. A yellow acidic liquid stared back at him and he clenched his throat in his hands, feeling it burn.

"Oh, Merlin," gasped Draco.

Harry groaned and frowned at how much the gesture made his throat burn more. He leaned against Draco's leg since he was standing beside him, not feeling like speaking for the next thousand years. Draco had the sense to keep his face straight and his thoughts sympathetic as sick was smeared onto his fresh pants.

"We'll try again tomorrow," he announced cheerily, hauling Harry up to take him away as Harry sent murderous thoughts his way.

"Treacle tart, Harry," chimed Draco. "Think of all the treacle tart."

Harry let himself be dragged to Draco's shower, knowing full well that he had no shot at winning this one. He had to convince Snape that his stomach was well enough to hold in treacle tart, which seemed absolutely ridiculous to him, since he had been able to live without it just fine so far. He couldn't see why this sudden conviction had come over Draco. He looked at Draco's innocent face suspiciously, almost completely sure that there was something he was hiding from him.