Late Night..
Wake me up when September Ends:
Oliver's p o v
" Ollie get up! If u don't get up in 15 minutes you will
Be late! Ollie I'm not yelling again! [ Olivia]
Mom chill out I'm up already! [ Oliver]
Most kids would be still laying in bed moaning at the thought of getting up for school first day or not it's still school. Not me I had already been up for hours trying on different outfits .I had to look fly today standing in front of the mirror while I looked at myself in the current one a pair of black khakis with a polo stripped black and tanned shirt from d&g West Hollywood running a hand through my now short slicked back spiked gelled hair. I forced myself to take a deep breath and study my reflection. Finally happy with how I looked I checked my cell fully expecting to see a message from Miley as we always do every first day of school where one of us would txt the other with some stupid joke. I got nothing in my in box sighing. I grabbed my bag and went downstairs where my mom was sitting at the table going through bills and preparing breakfast
Morning sweetie oh don't you look so handsome! [ Olivia]
Yea mom thanks that's great [ Oliver]
Please don't pinch the checks I thought over and over as she came over but in great relief she hugged me not the sympathy I thought to myself, please not THAT anything but that…thankfully she read my mind
And went back to getting food ready..
So do you and Lily have any plans after school? [ Olivia]
Yea we want to go see Mr. Stewart and Jackson [ Oliver]
That's sweet of you I talked to Robbie last night he's coping much better then I thought [Olivia]
Still I'm worried about him it's got to be devastating to lose a child…
I let mom's voice trail off as I grabbed a apple and my stuff I didn't want to talk about it thinking about it was enough and I did every damn moment I was awake even in my dreams.. I dreamed she was here with us … not thousands of miles away on tour..
Oliver your leaving already? School's not for another hour and a half
I'm shocked your even up this early but…[ Olivia]
I have stuff I need to take care off mom I'll call you later [ Oliver]
Hurrying outside I shivered as a wind ripped through the air it was barely 5 am and the night still hadn't fully lifted a light dusting of rain sprinkled the air as I scurried to my car a birthday present from Miley for my 17th b-day that had come and passed in late June a 2009 red mustang with black and white interior custom wheels and speakers. She must of ordered it months before my hand slide over the polished outside I wondered what she was thinking when she was ordering it I pictured the look on her face that gorgeous sweet face. I had grown accustomed to seeing every morning every night . Getting inside I pumped up the volume on my Cd player it had been awhile since I changed the Cd in it .I just couldn't bear to take it out the Cd was the latest by Miley as Hannah the song "Every part of me" was just starting and her sweet pure voice filled the air in every lyric you can hear her emotions just pouring through.
" Ohh-oh
I feel like I'm a million miles away
From myself
More and more these days
I've been down
So many open roads
But they never lead me home
And now I just don't know
Who I really am,
How it's gonna be
Is there something that I can't see
I wanna understand!
CHORUS:
Maybe I will never be
Who I was before
Maybe I don't even know her anymore
Maybe who I am today
Ain't so far from yesterday
Can I find a way to be
Every Part of Me
I knew better then anyone how messed up she was about the whole Hollywood thing sometimes she felt so overwhelmed that she just didn't know who she was for awhile she let fame go to her head and it played with her taunting her teasing her trying to get her to change from who she really was , no one knew this but sometimes at night she would awake in cold sweats terrified from a dream she had that seemed so real she was scared it would come true people expected so much from her she just never felt she could live up to their expectations. The dreams they would hit her when she least expected usually when she was overworked , usually I was spending the night at Lily's[ unknown to her mom of course].. Lily I smiled how amazing was my gorgeous girlfriend she was smart okay not the brightest out there but she was a dedicated student as any kid could be who didn't thoroughly love school.. she was athletic and funny and had the best personality and she cared for others oh yea and did I mention she is Ho.t.t well she is incredibly hot.. When Miley would call often crying Lily would jump up and race over to her house of course I would go cause it would be kind of awkward to be caught in her bed by her mom without Lily there. We would crawl into bed and hug her and let her talk ..it might be strange for some guys ..then it might be other guys fantasies come to life.. but to me it just was.. well normal…they had been my bffs forever.
Lily's house was only 15 minutes from mine and normally only took me 8 or 9 min to get there but my legs seemed to be on a Permanent freeze. All around were the signs of kids getting ready for the first day of school . I couldn't wait it was there I would see Miley! I couldn't believe it had been 3 months since I last saw her in May. We had danced to our fav songs and laughed so hard I remember the feel of her porcelain skin on my hands. Her long chest nut hair flying as we spun the smell of her cinnamon and van lotions and perfume. Then just as fast the music ended she was gone vanished into the night.
Lily's circular driveway rounded up the fountain spurting out water after the gate closed behind me I slowed the car and parked under a tree the one we have been parking by since Miles crashed into when she got her license. She was so excited to show us so much so she was waving and screaming as she pulled up twisting in her seat just waiting for our smiles not seeing the huge ass tree till it was in front of her too late crash.. no damage was done to her car or the tree but the look on Ms. Truscott's face when she saw the crash was hysterical. Hurrying out I saw Matt Lily's older brother running out to his car he waved as I got out late for his course on campus. Going inside there was silence her mom prob at the hospital on the late shift Matt gone off to class and Lily and Ricky prob still asleep not ones to get up early ever. When I got in however I was shocked to see her mom
Hey Oliver [ Heather]
Hey Ma'am [ Oliver]
How are you? I'm glad you're here for her first day
Yes I can't believe my baby is going to be a senior
Wow both of you! I can't get over that u 2 have known each
Other since you were four years old! [ Heather]
Yea it's so strange I thought I would be scared being a senior
But I just feel so strange so numb [ Oliver]
Well we all have different ways of dealing Oliver [ Heather]
Is she up yet? [ Oliver]
Not yet I've been calling her for the last hour [ Heather]
I'll go check on her again help yourself to anything you want hon [Heather]
Thanks ma'am I'm okay though [ Oliver]
Lily' s p. o. v [ dream ]
~~ Tell Lily she's the one by my side holding me
In my final moments
It's ok to cry but please only for a little while
Please go on be happy …
Screeching tires and red lights flash I'm feeling nauseated as I struggle to stand my legs feel weak I'm screaming.. for what? Help it's too late even as the word escapes my lips and my voice finds it's strength .I know it's in vain . I could feel the last breaths of her life escape her delicate lips and see her eyes lose their light and go blank. I'm struggling and crying as I lift her blood was all over me making it slippery to hold onto. I hear the e.m.t's yelling for me to put her down tears are spilling .I could smell gasoline and smoke there was crying yelling it was all so loud ..All I wanted was for it to stop! Their on me suddenly pushing me down I could hear Oliver's mom screaming at me to put Miles down she's pulling her out of my arms screaming for help as she grabs her shirt and pushes it against her chest .I start to stroke her hair and talk to her, kissing her hair begging her to hold on and keep fighting but her skin was already losing color .I saw Oliver's mom began to do chest compressions she shouts at me to do mouth to mouth my body freezes but somehow my fingers find their way to hers squeezing them I swear. I felt them enclose around me which gave me the strength to squirm over and start to blow in her mouth.. the feel of her lips contracts against mine which are still damp from chap stick and soda but hers are caked in blood and dirt . It seems hopeless I feel my arms burning with ache and pain so deep it feels like my arms are being pulled out but then her lungs fill with my air and she takes a deep breath. I feel my lips being sucked into hers. I don't fight for that one moment I feel what it's like to literally be as one with someone.
The ER is complete chaos a nurse leads me to my mom's bff Dana and she takes me into a room to wait for my mom. She stays with me trying to talk to me but all I want is to see my mom to find out about Miley. I'm freezing and I feel like I'm going to pass out but I keep pacing it seems to help. Anything to keep these horrible imagines from entering my mind the sounds the smells ..have u ever smelled burnt flesh? It's sickening it's something I have a feeling .I won't get out of my mouth or nose for as long as I live it's like leather being burned on a open flame mixed with sulfur like amino acid if that's not bad enough wait till the flames at a boil and throw in some oil and vinegar dressing and it's enough to make u want to slit your own throat. I'm trying to keep my stomach down but every time I get a hold on it I hear her voice haunting me saying it's okay to cry but to be happy.. but I can't cry cause crying would be admitting something I won't admit. I can't not until.
My mom comes in and I see the look on her face suddenly my walls collapse, I feel her arms wrap around me and my face falls against her chest and the tears start to flow as she holds me and kisses my head telling me she's here for me no matter what.. ~~
Mommy, Mommy! [Lily]
Lily I'm here baby right here! [mom]
Ah! [Lily]
I shot up and screamed as I felt my mom's arms wrap around me and embrace me rocking me and holding me soothing me as I tried to calm my breathing down.
What's wrong sweetie? [mom]
Dream again [lily]
What about? [mom]
The same as always
Want to talk about it?[mom]
She smoothed my hair and kissed my head. Shaking my head as she rocked me I swallowed and got up
Sometimes it helps to talk Lily
It can help to get out those feelings
Mom I'm fine really it's just one of
Those stupid back to school dreams[lily]
The one where you show up naked? [mom]
Yes that one it was so brutal
Amber and Ashley were taunting me
And I just ran and ran and I ended up ..
Well never mind it's over and I'm safe here
At home..[lily]
Thanks mom...
For what? [mom]
She held me away for a minute looking at me..running her hand over my face..I hugged her and smiled as I got up and went to shower.
Oliver was waiting for me when I came downstairs and greeted me I stopped and my breath sucked in. I couldn't believe how amazing he looked he had cut his hair and his whole face lite up when he smiled he looked so handsome and so grownup..Wow I was blown away how did I get so lucky to have him as a boyfriend? As soon as I got down he stood up and wrapped his arms around me as I squealed and held him close looking around real quick he saw my mom's back was turned so he leaned in slow and kissed me on my lips smiling inside I let myself sink into the kiss and felt his warm embrace comfort me. When we came out of the hug he rubbed my back and I laid my head on his shoulder.
After shoving our faces with food we went to his car I can remember the day miles ordered it she had been so excited I can still see her face as we picked out the parts and what she wanted inside she had bargained the dealer till he was almost crying it made me laugh thinking about it as I ran my hand over the outside of it.
We drove in silence there wasn't much to be said what can you say when your going to visit your fiends grave site?
Oliver was lost in his own world as he paid attention to the road his eyes focused on the cars around us I gripped the handle trying to fight off the feelings that being on this road made me feel ..I could hear the squeals and the horns. I could feel the burn on my legs as the metal twisted..my breathing became erratic ..
Lily are you okay? [Oliver]
Yea I'm fine...[Lily]
He stopped at the site
Go ahead I'll stay here...[Oliver]
Are you sure? [lily]
Yea..I don...[Oliver]
His eyes shifted as he looked around at the cemetery which was beautiful..
It's okay I get it..[Lily]
Getting out my legs and hands felt stiff as I took a deep breath and went up the hill. A slight wind blew in and sent shivers down my back did she know I was here? Was that her sending me a sign? Miley..her name hung on the tip of my brain. I wanted to scream her name to demand she come down she was needed here not there..we needed her we loved her how could anybody take her from us? It wasn't fair...I missed her everyday so much it hurt..I couldn't get that out of my head...people said she was at peace..peace my ass no one I mean no one was there with her in her final moments the way I was..I was the one holding her when she took her last breaths...the last conscience ones...stopping at her grave .I sat the flowers down and knelled my fingers brushed the dirt on the ground it had flattened but it was still some what raised indicating that this was a fresh grave..fresh tears pulled my eyelids forcing their way down my face as I ran my fingers over her head stone the words blended together as I read them...
Beloved Sister Daughter and Friend
MILEY RAY STEWART
A Butterfly Born On Earth To Blossom
And Fly In The Fields Of Heaven..
For Every Life That Fades Something Beautiful Remains ..
God sent an Angel to the earth...
The sweetest angel too
And for such a tiny little thing,
She had so much to do.
She knew she did not have
Much time upon this earth to stay,
So she did not waste a second;
She got started right away.
Her eyes were bright and sparkly,
She took in every turn.
She did not miss a single thing,
Because Angel came to learn!
God sent her here to touch the
Hearts of those he could not reach...
She taught them courage, strength and faith,
Because Angel came to teach.
Her tiny little body
Was so full of God above,
You felt it when you held her,
Because MILEY RAY came to love.
In Sixteen Years she managed
What many never will.
When she went home to Jesus,
Her purpose was fulfilled.
She learned and taught, loved and played,
She learned her lessons well.
I know he was so proud of her
When she went home to dwell.
But when I miss her OH-SO-MUCH,
I can almost hear him say,
Please understand, her work was done...
MILEY RAY did not come to stay.
Flap your wing now you can't stay
Take those dreams and make them all come true
Butterfly Fly Away (butterfly fly away)
We been waiting for this day
All along and know just what to do
Butterfly,
Butterfly,
Butterfly,
Butterfly Fly Away
"Oh Miley I miss you so much...Why did you have to go..
I love you so much baby girl...
I miss you even more..I can't believe
That I have to start high school without
You we were suppose to do this together!
I know I am being selfish you didn't ask to die
But it's not right.."God I hate this"!
I know ,I know you are probably angry at me
For sitting here at your grave instead of taking time
With Oliver getting ready for classes but miley I can't do this without you
Who am I suppose to talk to about boys and dates
Who is suppose to tell me I am being too tomboyish?
Who am I suppose to have calm me down before a big game?
Who can I double date with?
We were suppose to do everything together have the same classes
Same lunch remember we wanted to go out to
All the restaurants and live it up
We were planning a huge bash for our seventeenth birthday
We were suppose to do each other's hair for prom night go shopping
For prom dresses...
Have our kids together and you were suppose to go on this huge world tour
You promised me you promised me forever!
The tears started to flow harder as I gripped the dirt and felt the pain and the anger explode in my chest .I opened my eyes and threw the dirt which went everywhere hitting rocks graves and other things a package fell from the pile of presents that lined her grave it opened and out fell a tiny stuffed bear... it reminded me of berry bear her favorite bear , she loved that old bear..it made me smile when I remembered how she had thrown a huge fit when Jackson accidentally damaged it.. her dad had buried her with it..that image of her laying in her coffin left a lump in my throat so big I started to choke … she was buried in her favorite Hannah outfit a pair of white crystal jeans a powered blue sparkly tank top that went past her waist a white belt and a short jacket that was splashed with colors her long chest nut hair had been spiraled and fell down her face making her look like a angel her arms were crossed across her chest a gold cross necklace fell short above her closed fists. Berry lay under her left arm. Was that a sign? Did she try to tell me something? God why? That's all I kept asking why her? Why not me? Miley had so much talent she had so many dreams she had everything millions of fans who were wondering where Hannah went? Drying my tears I remembered a poem Mandy had recited at her funeral she hadn't shed a tear and I remember asking myself how could she say she loved her and yet she didn't cry? When she said the poem it made me stop and ask myself did she know her better then any of us? Was this what miles would of said to us if she could talk?
Don't weep at my grave,
For I am not there,
I've a date with a butterfly
To dance in the air.
I'll be singing in the sunshine,
Wild and free,
Playing tag with the wind,
Please don't weep for me.
How can I live
What am I to do
Now apart of my heart,
Is buried with you?
Taking a deep breath I got up I knew I had to go on, that's what she would of wanted and that's what she deserved.
Oliver was standing by the car waiting arms crossed eyes closed I went over and kissed his lips wrapping my arms around him he uncrossed his and held me close. I felt him kiss my head his hands rubbed my back..
Ready for the first day of school? [lily]
Yes! [Oliver]
He unhooked his arms and wrapped one around my shoulders as we turned just as the sun started to peek its lazy head out..a rustle of leaves caught my eyes as I saw a cocoon break apart and a beautiful butterfly spread its wings it hesitated and looked at me for a minute then when I smiled it took off into the wind towards the heavens spreading its colorful rays over my heart.
Yes I'm ready Ollie Pop [Lily]
Good So am I Lily Pop [Oliver]