I do not own Twilight, SM does but I love playing with the characters so enjoy!

FYI****Not to spoil anything but there is a little self-lovin in this chapter and I don't want to offend anyone so you've been warned. (It's not graphic you'll have to use your own imagination)

21. Was That a Dream?

BPOV

"You're already enough B. I could never leave you…not now…not ever," the soft silky voice spoke the last words I heard as I drifted off to sleep.

I was walking through the forest behind Edward. Everything was dark and oppressive. The air was heavy, and it was hard to breathe. As my hand touched my throat I realized I was wearing a collar. My eyes snapped up to the man in front of me. He was grinning wickedly as he tugged on a short leash that was attached to the collar making it hard for me to breathe. "Edward," I gasped clutching my throat as I stumbled into a clearing. Rosalie stood in the middle of the clearing with Emmett sitting at her feet. She glared at me as she greeted Edward. "Emmett," I called but he wouldn't look at me. Suddenly a cold breeze blew through the trees and Victoria was standing next to Rosalie grinning evilly. "I told you she wasn't strong enough to take what she wanted. She'll always be a pleaser…never standing up for herself…never thinking she's enough," Rosalie sneered as she spoke to Victoria. Edward laughed menacingly. "She is rather easy to control, isn't she Rosie. Never listening to her instincts…always letting others make decisions for her. She couldn't even decide between me or your pet…how easily she let me win…not even a fight," Edward was laughing maniacally.

Tears streamed down my cheeks as I watched them laughing at me. "Emmett…please…help me," I begged. His head slowly turned towards me and the same painful look I'd seen in his eyes earlier stared back at me. "You made your choice B….it wasn't me remember?" Emmett whispered. A guttural scream escaped my lips as the realization of my decision hit me. "NOOO-OOOO! It's you I want…I changed my mind….please…." I screamed. Everything became fuzzy and the forest started to fade away as I scrunched my eyes closed.

My heart began beating faster as I opened my eyes. I was standing in my kitchen, leaning against the counter. Emmett was standing in front of me with his hands on the counter on either side of me. "You came back?" I questioned quietly as I leaned up to kiss him. His body stiffened as he straightened and took a step back. I looked at him confused not understanding why he was moving away from me. "Am I really what you want B? Are you sure?" He asked hesitantly as I stepped towards him. "I'm scared," I whispered reaching my hand out to touch his cheek. "Life is scary. Sometimes there's pain…sometimes there's joy…sometimes there's pleasure," he said locking his jet black eyes on me. He stepped towards me this time and I stepped back. My heart was racing and I couldn't tell what he wanted from me. My lower back hit the edge of the counter as he pressed his body to mine. "I can give you anything you want B…" He said huskily as he held my gaze. "All you have to do is ask." He whispered into my ear as his hands found my hips pulling me even closer to him. My breathing was ragged, "Yes….please."

He chuckled lightly. "Please, what B? If you chose me than you have to tell me what you want," Emmett said with a smirk as his nose ran up my cheek and into my hair. "Touch me Emmett…anywhere…please Em… everywhere…" I begged through ragged breaths.

EmPOV

I sat up on the edge of the branch when I heard Jacob ask Bella if she wanted truth or dare. I knew she wouldn't choose dare again and I was curious what the mutt would ask her. "Fine…truth," she answered. I could tell she was upset. I wonder if he knows that, I thought. "Okay truth. Remember you have to be completely honest," Jacob paused momentarily. "After everything that's happened these past few months…everything you've learned…do you still consider becoming one of them?" My mouth fell open. Did he really just ask her if she still wanted to be a vampire? Before I could even think about it I was out of the tree and outside the back door. I'd wanted to ask Bella that same question so many times in the past few days. I had to know the answer. I waited anxiously. "Bella you know we can protect you," Jake whispered. Nice one dog! Try to sway her choice…my thoughts cut off as she spoke. "I would never want to spend an eternity alone without someone who loved me," she said. What! That's not an answer B! I love you…WOW! Did I really just think that? I shook my head and refocused on the conversation inside the house. "Bells that's not an answer, yes or no," Jacob said firmly. "I'm sorry but I need to know what I'm up against. I can't give you an eternity Bells. I can only give you the one life I have…and hope it's enough," he said softly. I could hear the pleading in his voice. I'd give anything to see her face right now. I heard a bottle lid being removed and liquid being poured into a glass. That can't be Bella. She's not really going to take a shot is she? I strained my ears to hear. "That's the only answer I have right now Jake," she said quietly before I heard her swallow and set the glass down.

I ran my fingers through my hair roughly as I stepped off the back deck. The sound of their goodbyes fell to the back of my mind as I thought about what'd just happened. She didn't say yes, but she didn't say no. Would she still be willing to be turned if she knew I loved her? Would she love me back? My mind was reeling as I paced in her backyard. "You better keep her safe tonight," Jacob spat out angrily as he started his bike and took off down the drive. I sighed and continued my pacing knowing she hadn't heard him. She pushed me away today. She can't love me…not like that. The sound of her window being opened brought my pacing to a halt. I inhaled deeply making sure I hadn't missed any scents while I was wrapped up in my internal monologue. The air was clear except for her heavenly scent as it drifted down to me.

"I'm sorry Emmett," her soft voice carried out into the night air. "Another broken heart would break me beyond repair. I can't let myself hope for something I can never have. You're not mine…I can never be enough…" Her broken voice trailed off as the scent of salt water hit my nostrils. She's crying. Oh B…I saw her light shut off as I scaled the tree outside her window. I listened to her ragged breathing as she cried herself to sleep. As her heart rate slowed I slid inside the window and walked to her sleeping form. "You're already enough B. I could never leave you…not now…not ever," I whispered as my fingers ghosted over her cheek. I couldn't help but stand and watch her sleep. She seemed so edgy still…not peaceful like she'd been in my arms last night.

I sighed as I thought of how she felt in my arms. Why did she push me away? I thought she wanted me to kiss her. My mind was still running around in circles over our kiss earlier and I couldn't make sense of anything that'd happened between us all day. "Edward…" Bella called as her hands clutched at her throat. Her heart rate sped as she began to get restless. I watched helplessly as she mumbled incoherently in her sleep. She's dreaming of him…a guttural scream escaped her lips. "NOOO-OOOO! It's you I want…I changed my mind….please." I let out a breath I'd be holding as my last hopes of her ever caring for me vanished. Her body relaxed against the bed and her breathing returned to normal as I turned to leave the room. I wouldn't push myself on her and she'd obviously chosen him already….even if she didn't realize it yet.

"You came back?" She asked. I spun around to look at her thinking she'd woken up and seen me. I smiled at the look of joy on her face as she rested peacefully. Why'd he have to be such a dick to her? She obviously still loves him. I sighed heavily as I turned back to the window to leave. "I'm scared," she whispered stopping me in my tracks. Her heart rate began to increase again and she began to pant. "Yes…please," she breathed as I turned to look at her one last time and froze. She'd pushed her blankets onto the floor. One hand was fisted into the sheets while the other was cupping her neck as she wiggled on the bed. "Touch me Emmett…anywhere…please Em… everywhere…" She begged through ragged breaths. Me? She's dreaming of me? I stood frozen watching as her hand slid down the front of her body. She began to moan uncontrollably as her fingers slid into her shorts. This CAN NOT be happening! My mouth hung open, mind racing as I continued to watch her pleasure herself. "Yes Emmett…right there baby…don't stop," she screamed as her hips bucked off the bed. I shouldn't be here…watching this….oh god I'm so hard. Damn she's so sexy. I can't believe she's dreaming of me doing that to her….my mind continued to race as her hips bucked one last time before she settled back onto the bed. Mhmmm…oh that smell…I can almost taste her. What I wouldn't give to taste her now…I thought. She rolled onto her side and curled into a ball with a contented sigh. Cold shower…Rosalie's voice…wrinkled old man…I sighed as my pants loosened considerably.

Now what? I thought as a cool breeze blew through the window. Bella shivered. I walked over and laid her blankets back on top of her so she wouldn't get cold. Look at that beautiful flush on her cheeks. She got that thinking about me! I gave myself an internal fist pump before my shoulders sagged with disappointment. She pushed me away today. Does she want me or not? How am I supposed to figure this out? I sunk down to the floor and watched her sleep. I can't be here when she wakes up. What if she remembers the dream? How do I find out what that dream was about…well besides the obvious? I smirked to myself. Maybe she just needs some time. I can do that right…give her time? Of course, she'll be going to the rez tonight for the funeral anyway.

Before I knew it the sun had risen and Bella was stirring in her sleep. I jumped out the window and ran to the house so I could get ready for another day.

BPOV

I felt the sun warming my face as I stretched out on the bed. It's quiet. I thought as I rolled over onto my side to see the clock. Almost eleven…wow I haven't slept this long in a while. I rubbed my eyes as I sat up on the edge of the bed. What? I thought as I ran my fingers between my legs. Why are my panties soaked? I thought. Oh god what happened! I began to panic as I looked quickly around the room. Focus Isabella! What happened last night? I thought back to opening the window and speaking to Emmett in the hopes he was listening. Then what? I cried myself to sleep and heard his soft, silky voice as I drifted off. Wait! The dream…oh god…I ran my fingers over my shorts again feeling how wet they were. I sighed and fell back onto the bed. It was a dream right? It felt so real…obviously my orgasm was or I wouldn't be this wet. Mhmm….the things Emmett did to me in that dream…my eyes drifted closed as I let that part of my dream replay in my head. My fingers began moving over my shorts as a low moan escaped my lips. I could smell him…his fingers felt so real…I thought as my hand moved up to my waistband. My hand slid slowly down the front of my shorts into my panties, "BELLA! Are you up yet sweetie?" My dad called as he slammed the front door of the house. I ripped my hand out of my shorts and groaned as he came up the steps.

"Yea, I'm up. Just getting ready to get in the shower unless you need it," I called before he could come into my room. I heard his footsteps stop outside my door and shift nervously. "No Bells, you go ahead. I'll be heading back down to the reservation in a couple of hours to finish setting up for the funeral. Do you want to ride with me or come down later by yourself?" He asked. Do I want to go to the rez early? "Um…I think I'll ride with you if that's okay," I said quickly. "Sure thing Bells, be ready in by one okay?" He called as he walked away towards his room. I sighed heavily getting off the bed and gathering my things for the shower. I couldn't help but stop at the still opened window and look out. Ugh…I hope I didn't talk in my sleep last night. I turned back around when I didn't see any sign of life.

I hope Emmett comes back today. I thought as the hot water ran down my body. I had a nagging ache I knew wouldn't go away by itself. My head fell lightly against the shower wall as my eyes closed and my hands trailed down my wet body. Thoughts of Emmett and last night's dream filled my head as my fingers found what they were looking for.

Sorry for the short chapter but some major things will be changing next chapter. REVIEW anyway and let me know what you think. Thanks for reading.