Sixth Year came and went. Much to her relief, Snape didn't have to interact with James Potter for the time being. It seems he was too busy with Quidditch to keep in contact, and it was for the best. There was no visible disgrace from the love potion incident, but most of her peers still laughed at her behind her back until she stated to hex them again. She'd gotten a few detentions as a result, but it was worth it.
Her relationship with Lily had improved. She was trying to be more understanding, and less controlling and Lily continued to give her space when she needed it. The physical side of their relationship had continued to grow, though it seemed they were just as content holding each other and read together.
With the advent of the Final Year, they were beginning to discuss their future and build their life together.
"Life beyond Hogwarts, now that's a thought," Lily laughed lightly. "Are you as scared of it as I am?"
Even if she was, she would never say so.
"Any thought on your plans?" she asked instead.
Lily frowned. "Slughorn wants me to apply to the Potions Institute in Oslo for a Mastery."
"Lily, that's amazing," Snape replied proudly. "You should go."
"But Oslo? I'd be so far from you! And who knows if I'd fit in. Most of the people there will be Drumstrang Graduates, and they're notorious for their Anti-Muggle sentiments."
"Well, they might, but they might be happy to have you. You shouldn't judge someone by the school they went to, just like you don't judge someone for their House," Snape teased.
Lily kissed her and rested her head on her chest. They had snuck out and were sitting in a stone alcove at Gryffindor tower, watching the stars. It had been their spot for a while to talk. The light April breeze wafted through the room, sending them into a shiver. Snape held Lily tightly and kissed her back.
"What about you, Vera? You keep pestering me about my career, what are your plans?"
"I'm thinking of applying to be a cursebreaker," she replied. "But I've hit a bit of a snag. I have the grades, and the skill, but I can't seem to convince any of the professors to write me a recommendation."
"What about Slughorn?" Lily asked. "He adores you."
"No, Lily, he adores you. He says it's not really a suitable career for a woman with the long hours and the danger."
"Oh pish, sometimes I forget that man's a dinosaur." Lily scowled. "Flitwick? Kettleburn? McGonnagall?"
"No from all of them," Snape responded. "It seems my extracurricular activities did not endear myself to them. They blame me for the whole mass suspension thing."
"But you've changed. Can't they give you the benefit of the doubt?" Lily asked.
"I think it's something more than that. I think they've already signed me off as a Death Eater." Snape replied angrily.
"Oh Vera, I'm sure there are other options. Maybe you could join me in the Potions field." Lily persisted.
"That's the last thing I'd want, but I appreciate the suggestion," she smiled weakly.
She was about to head down to the dungeons when Lily reminded her of Petunia's wedding. If she was going to have to suffer, so would Snape. She even convinced Petunia to make her a bridesmaid, so she could be in the wedding party.
Snape sighed. "Sometimes I wonder whether you really do like to see me suffer," she muttered.
When she made her way back to the Slytherin Common Room, she found that there was still one student up, staring moodily into the fire.
"Regulus, it's two in the morning? Shouldn't you be in bed?" She asked.
He looked up and gave her a withering glance. It did not phase her.
"Ah, I'd been meaning to talk to you. I have a note." He pulled out one of those blasted envelopes from his robes, and she snatched it. She briefly skimmed it before throwing it in the fire.
"Lucius will be pleased to know all that effort for customized stationary was so vital." Regulus drawled.
"Why now? What do they even want me anymore?" She asked bitterly.
"Well, you're almost of age. You're fair game. Of course, if you want to they can initiate you sooner and you could work your way up. I'm sure you can get into the Inner Circle in a few years," he added optimistically.
"What if I changed my mind? I was thinking of going abroad to study at the Oslo Potions Institute," Snape lied casually.
Regulus glared at her. "It's much too late for that. Let me show you something."
He rolled up his sleeve, revealing the bright red scar she'd seen on Rosier. The skull and the snake eating its tail.
She bit her lip to stop herself from gasping. "Is it new?" She asked. He nodded proudly.
"I was inducted last night. Made an excuse to go see Mumsy. Oh, if only you were there, Vera. They were so proud of me," he beamed.
"Can I touch it?" She asked, curious. He extended his arm, and she gently moved her fingers over the raw raised skin. He flinched slightly at the pain but kept smiling.
"You'll definitely reconsider once you get to this level, Vera. No more second thoughts, no backpedaling. We need you now more than ever," Regulus murmured. He met her eyes, but she kept still and waited for him to try to use Legimency. When he did not, she looked away.
"You're so young. Are you sure this is what you want?" She asked.
"I've never been surer of anything." He answered.
"So, how did you get it?" Snape asked. "Rosier wouldn't tell me the details, but it sounds unpleasant."
Regulus frowned. "You shouldn't worry about that yet. It's…not a big deal, not really." He shuffled uncomfortably and rolled his sleeve back down, heading back to the chair. He motioned for her to sit with him.
"No thank you Black. Unlike you, I do need my rest." Snape dismissed.
"Did you like the book I gave you?" He asked. "I hope you did."
"Yes, it was quite nice, thank you." Snape clipped. "Now, if you excuse me,"
"Just stay here for a moment. You don't have to say anything, I just don't want to be alone right now." He admitted. "I know, it's pathetic."
"You're right, it is," She agreed, but still sat next to him on the settee.
As they stared into the fire, Regulus spoke up.
"I had to kill a man, it was a Muggleborn. That's how you earn the Mark, you know," he whispered.
Snape froze, and felt a pit growing in her stomach. "Did you know him?" she asked.
"No. He was nobody," Regulus continued listlessly. "They made his wife watch, then they killed her too. I…had to position them afterwards, to send a message to the Aurors when they found them."
They sat silently, but she couldn't stay there any longer. She wrested herself from him and retreated to bed.
As Snape lay in bed, she cried. There was no way out now, even if she wanted to leave. Did they know about Lily? Would Rosier tell them?
Terror grappled her as her nightmares filled with the recurring thought of killing Lily. Her wand poised to strike, and a bright green flash.
She knew what she had to do.
The next day after class, she asked Lily if they could talk. It did not go well.
"Vera, I don't understand. Why would you want to end things? Is it something I've done? I've tried so hard to be a good girlfriend, I really have." Lily started to cry, and it was only making what she had to do worse.
"Lily, it's not like I want to do this, but if we keep seeing each other, your life is at risk."
She explained the letter she received from Lucius.
"I can't get out Lily, I'm done for. And I'll be damned if they make me hurt you." She replied in anguish.
Lily frowned. "I really had thought it was all over. But I won't let them take you, we must find some other way. Maybe we could talk to Dumbledore."
"What would he do?" Snape replied angrily. "It's not like he'd be able to help me. And we can't hide our relationship forever. I think Rosier knows, and he could tell any of them. I'm a liability to you, Lily. Please leave me to rot. Take that Potions apprenticeship and get as far away from this blasted country as you can."
"I'm not giving up on you Vera!" Lily shouted.
"What if I'm giving up on you?" Snape growled. "I'm just as stubborn as you are."
Lily wavered. "Do you mean that? I know we could fight this, or if we can't we'll at least have each other."
"Don't even think that. It sounds glamorous and fine, dying for love. But these people are ruthless. They might do worse before they kill you, and your last moments will be nothing but terrifying pain. Do you really want that?" Snape shouted back.
"I want you, I don't care about what it costs." Lily replied firmly.
They weren't getting anywhere, it seems.
Snape continued on, but she tried to avoid Lily as much as she could. As much as she hated to see her upset, it was for the best.
When James Potter stopped by her annex, he was the last person she wanted to deal with.
"I'm busy, Potter." She snapped.
"You've been a hard one to find. I thought we were supposed to meet up months ago to talk about well, you know." He circled his wrist in a motion that indicated he was trying to mention the Life Debt without being too obvious but failing.
"Well, go on," Snape urged.
James hurriedly sat down next to her, fidgeting as he watched her chop milk thistle.
"Are you going to just keep going with that, or should I wait for you to stop?" he asked.
Sighing, she put her knife down and glared at him. "I'm listening."
"Oh." He blinked. "Well, I was looking through the Restricted Section, when I found what I think is our answer. He reached into his bag and pulled out a tatter leather book titled Bonding Magick.
"Didn't think you were the type to spend much time in the library," she snarked.
"Shut up," he snapped. He opened to a passage in the middle of the book. It was in barely legible Latin.
"So, this is from the Early Medieval Period, where it seems there was more information on the subject. I haven't seen anything more recent, but maybe there's something off about it." James explained.
"Off?" Snape asked uncertainly.
"Well, there's a few options here. The most obvious would be to save my life, then we're even."
"Then let's do it, I'm sure we can put you in danger somehow," Snape quipped.
"It's not that simple, it can't be staged, or else it doesn't count." He added, rolling his eyes. "The next option would be to save the life of someone in my line. I assume that means any children I might have in the future."
"That's not happening for a while," Snape surmised. Eyebrow raised.
"Obviously." He nodded.
"And, the last one…" He bit his lip. "Well, you aren't going to like it."
"It seems like the only option, so tell me." Snape urged.
"It is the only option we have the most control of, but it seems a bit archaic. Apparently, it was used a lot by wizards back in the day…" James rambled.
"Get on with it, Potter." Snape muttered.
"Marriage." He blurted. "We'd have to get married. The bonding ceremony cancels out the Life Debt, since we'll be bonding our lives together. But it has to be real, our magic has to entwine, or else it doesn't count."
Snape was stunned. She furrowed her brows. "Will there have to be a ceremony?" She asked.
"Yes," James replied. He blushed, like he was the only one mortified by the idea.
"Will we have to…consummate our union?" She hissed.
He looked lost, terrified. "I'm not sure."
"I don't need to express how awful this idea is," Snape replied venomously.
James ran his hands through his hair and fidgeted. "I admit, it's a last-ditch effort, but we don't have that many options, do we?"
"We? What do you mean we?" Snape asked.
"Lily told me about well, your problem. If we do this, we can convince everyone you're trustworthy. We can get Dumbledore to help you, I'm sure you could be useful in some way or another." James pleaded.
"Lily told you? That was a private matter!" She shouted. Snape got up, "I'm going to talk to her."
James grabbed her arm. "I don't know if we should tell her. The less she knows about this the better."
"What do you mean?" Snape asked, eyes narrowing.
"Well, if you're going to have to be a Death Eater anyway, why not use it to your advantage?" James asked casually.
"Because it's certain death," Snape replied.
"So, you're just going to cave, give in like a coward? It's not like Lily will be able to forgive you for it." James taunted.
"Which is why I was giving her up! Why are you so interested in helping me, anyway? Now that she's free, shouldn't you be lining up your chances with her?" Snape asked angrily.
"Because this isn't about us, Vera. I think we could do something that's good for the war, for everyone. Not just us, or Lily." He replied passionately.
Snape exhaled, then rubbed her temples. "How far have you gotten with this? Have you spoken to Dumbledore about this?"
James looked sheepish. "I…might have, he has his doubts about you, but he wants to know if you genuinely want to do this. We are going to meet one of his associates in his office. He wouldn't tell me who."
"When are we meeting him?" Snape asked.
"Um, now?"
"Now? And you didn't bother to tell me any of this ahead of time!" She screamed.
"I knew you wouldn't have agreed," James answered. He grabbed her hand and led her towards his office.
When they arrived at the office, they were greeted by a steely eyed headmaster and a broad gruff looking man with grizzled dark grey hair and piercing blue eyes, one larger than the other and moving on its own.
"Welcome! Please, have a seat," Dumbledore motioned. "Let me introduce my good friend, Alastor Moody, Head of the Auror Department. He's not here on official business."
"So, this is the girl." Moody harrumphed. "I'm not sure about this, Albus. We can't trust her."
"You can, and she's willing to do anything to help." James replied, grasping her hand. He looked her in the eyes determined.
"I don't know if I can in good conscious allow either of you to get involved in our operations, Mr. Potter, especially in this manner." Dumbledore frowned. "Miss Snape, would you really be willing to risk your life, and your soul, so easily?"
"I'd be willing to risk everything," Snape replied firmly. "I'd risk it all because I'm doing it for love."
Moody snorted. "Charming. Welcome aboard then. As much as I think this is a disaster, we don't have too many options. When is your initiation?"
"I have an open invitation, they can induct me when I want to join," Snape replied calmly, her mind racing.
"Do you have any combat experience?" Moody asked.
"I have been a part of an unofficial dueling club," she added.
"Not good enough if you really want to live and be of use." Moody growled. "I'm going to have to test your skills, get up."
Warily, Snape stood up, and Moody blasted her with a curse. Instinctively, she blocked and struck back. They parried and dodged, striking with curses, but narrowing missing. Satisfied, he stopped.
"Not bad, raw but you could possibly survive." Moody admitted. "So, we better set some boundaries. You will not be talking to me directly after this point. If you are discovered, no one will back you up, you are alone. You will report any information on Death Eater operations and attacks to Mr. Potter, who will report me."
"Won't that be suspicious, if he's seen with you?" Snape asked.
"We've got it covered," James interrupted, taking out a small leather book. He handed it to Moody.
"It's a linked journal. It's blank, but when I write any updates it will show up on the page coinciding with the date. When the message is over, the ink dissolves. It will be timed for the same time daily."
Moody grunted. "Did you come up with this yourself, boy?"
"Yes, sir. I had a bit of free time, it wasn't too difficult," James replied nervously.
"Don't get too cocky." Moody snapped. He took the book and stuffed it in his pocket. He gave a nod to Dumbledore. "We'll talk soon Albus." He stepped into the fireplace and disappeared.
After they were dismissed, James escorted Snape back to the dungeons.
"How am I going to tell Lily?" Snape asked.
James frowned. "I'm not sure, but I certainly don't envy you," he chuckled, but his eyes couldn't hide his worry.
"Are you going to tell the others? Black, Lupin, or Pettigrew?" Snape pried.
"I'm going to have to, aren't I? I mean, they're going to be at the wedding."
Snape closed her eyes tightly. "Merlin! The wedding. How are we going to plan that?"
"I'll take care of it," James replied. "You don't have to do anything."
Snape nodded. "Good, because that's really the last thing I want to think of. But no funny business."
James laughed, "Oh, I'll try. But I can't promise we won't have a little fun," he winked.
"We're really doing this?" Snape asked. "We're falling to our own damnation and you're acting so blasé?"
"How else should we act? We have to get on with it, might as well not act so morose all the time." James replied, his smile faltering before his mouth formed a thin line.
"I hope you know what you're doing," Snape responded. "Because now there's no going back."