A/N: Hey guys! Here is chapter 21! Now that we've had our fill of angst-filled drama, it's time for things to start falling into place and head to where they should head. I wasn't going to put you through emotional hell and not pay it off, after all.
So here's a chapter featuring the return of Dr. Mitchell, good-guy Jesse, a visiting Legacy, and Aubrey's chat with Beca. I'll try to get chapter 22 up by tomorrow but it might not be as long as this. Depends really.
I don't own pitch perfect.
Communication is the key.
Beca never really understood what that meant until now. A good talking – more like scolding – from Luke was enough to make her see it.
That, and well, she was bound to see it soon right?
She was in love with Chloe Beale, with everything that made her who she was and more. She had been in love with her for as long as she could remember, for the length of time she's known Chloe. And she was being an idiot for not wanting to accept that truth.
And if only Beca did more than just try. Chloe brought the Bellas to Luke's window when they had hurt her, they sang to her and all. Meanwhile, what does Beca do this time that Chloe was the one hurt? She texts her, calls her, then gives up and gives into her own heartache, letting it consume her completely.
But really, the answer was there right in front of her. She should have gathered the courage to go after Chloe, figure out why she was being distant in the first place – because really, it felt like they were in a fight but they don't even know what it was all about.
All their problems could be solved, if not all then most, if they just talked. And Beca was willing to do anything and everything in her power to prove to Chloe, she would never do anything to willingly hurt her or break her heart. She would never dare.
Baby we've been living in sin 'cause we've been really in love
But we've been living as friends
Beca chuckled as she pulled her buds out of her ears and wrapped them up as neatly as she could before shoving it in her pockets. She took a deep breath to calm herself a little before walking the short distance she had left to her father's house.
It was Spring Break. Emily was coming in for a few days to visit while her parents were in town for business. The step-monster was away for a conference somewhere and her dad was going to a different one by the end of the week.
It was now or never. Beca's got a lot on her mind and they had a lot to talk about.
"I'm glad you manage to find yourself here Beca, that is, without me forcing you to come." Dr. Mitchell had said, grabbing a pot of coffee and pouring a cup for both himself and Beca.
"I know, who knew miracles can happen?" Beca remarked as she gladly accepted the cup.
"What's on your mind Beca?" her dad asked, genuinely curious with the purpose of her visit.
"I don't know. A lot I guess. I have to admit, I hated you for making me come to Barden for a year, it felt like I was sentenced to prison for a lifetime. In the end though, well, I hated Barden for probably only the first few hours of being here. I didn't want to go to class, I wanted to make it as worse as it possibly could but then I met Chloe, and Amy, and Stacie and the Bellas, Luke with the radio show, and Jesse and…" Beca started to say, honestly speaking what was on her mind. "Things just got so crazy, and the year's going by without me even noticing it. Other than the radio show and a handful of friends, I don't really have much anymore. I mean, the plan was to not make attachments but…"
"You miss the Bellas? You miss the crazy things that made the year go by so fast?" Dr. Mitchell asked with an understanding look and Beca nodded gently.
"Hey, no one was more surprised than me, but I really liked those girls. Even Aubrey Posen, you do know Aubrey, right?"
"Yeah, really good student." Dr. Mitchell commented. "But you were the one who quit the first place Beca. You thought that quitting was the answer before you even made it last."
"Seriously? You can say that to me?"
"Come on Beca, we're having a nice chat. Don't be unfair. Look, your mom and I, we didn't work out and it's not like we didn't give it our all and tried. But now, I'm trying so hard to make things right between us. I know my methods aren't perfect, my approach is more apprehensive to you than anything and often times, intentions get lost along the way. But every time I do reach out, you shut me out."
"Yeah, well, I shut everybody out. Don't take it personally. It's just easier."
"It's also really lonely." Dr. Mitchell pointed out and Beca knew just so well how true it was.
"What do I do?"
"Well, that's up to you." Dr. Mitchell replied.
"I want to make things right, but I don't know how to. The Bellas, they're still all within reach but we're all drifting apart. And Chloe…"
"What about Ms. Beale?" Dr. Mitchell asked with a knowing look in his eyes.
"Well, I… I miss her. A lot. I don't even know if you're allowed to miss anyone this much." Beca replied honestly, trying to carefully to choose her words. She didn't quite know how to open this topic up with her dad, her mom would have been easier.
And now Beca wishes she talked to her mom about this first but that's too late now.
"What happened?" Dr. Mitchell asked.
"I don't know either. I'm just sure that somewhere along the way I messed up or something."
"Beca, you don't know that for sure. Have you tried to talk to Chloe?"
"I tried texting her. I left a message too. Guess I should've done more, huh?"
You'd be surprised at how many problems could be solved with talking." Dr. Mitchell noted before taking a sip of his coffee. "But there's more to it, am I correct?"
Beca gave a weak smile. "Well, I… Chloe… she's… uh…"
Dr. Mitchell smiled and reached out to give his daughter's hand a squeeze. "If I had known that all I need was to introduce you to a student of mine to get you here to Barden and stay, I would have done that immediately."
Beca stared at her dad confused. "You're not freaking out."
"I don't think I have the right to, I barely know my daughter and I'd be a hypocrite to judge her for anything that she is." Dr. Mitchell said simply. "Did you ever have a girlfriend before?"
"What part of I don't let people in is not clear?" Beca threw back slightly amused. "Besides, Chloe's not my girlfriend."
"Ah, I'd assume no boyfriends then either. Well, at least that's good." Dr. Mitchell replied. "And do you want her to be?"
Beca smiled fondly at the thought, a bittersweet feeling settling in. "I don't even know if she feels the same way. I mean, she seems fine going out with someone else."
"Oh yeah, sure, any ordinary person in their right mind will go to their friend's parent's house at the crack of dawn to defend them and make sure the deal for a dream said friend is chasing stays intact." Dr. Mitchell deadpanned, something that surprised Beca a little. "Come on Beca, I think we both know the answer to that question. Besides, people sometimes deal with things the best they can, they deal with things differently. If she thought you didn't feel the same way, she would want to heal her broken heart too and move on. But that doesn't matter if you're not clear with yourself. What is Chloe to you? What does she mean?"
"I… it's… that's one difficult question you've got there…" Beca started rambling.
"What makes you say that?"
"I don't know, I feel like, it's just… every time I think about it…"
"Maybe you shouldn't? Love isn't something you overthink Beca, it's something you feel."
Beca nodded thoughtfully. "She's the unexpected." she finally answered almost as instant as she thought of it. And it was true. Chloe Beale was everything Beca never thought would be possible, the person she never thought she'll need. Beca never thought she would ever crave a person's touch, or hugs, or search for their presence like a need. She never thought she'd look into someone's eyes and lose herself completely, or ever feel safe in anyone's arms the way she did with Chloe. She never thought she would ever meet someone that would push her, make her want to be better. She never thought hearing a voice could ever soothe her nerves, wash away her fears, and comfort her. She never thought a person could ever be a home. Chloe Beale was the unexpected, the dream that Beca never though she had until the day she realized it, until it was already there having completely taken over her.
Dr. Mitchell smiled and Beca could see he understood. "This, and whatever I decide to do… you're okay with all of this?" she asked.
"You're my daughter Beca. All that matters to me is that you're happy, that someone loves you for all you are. Chloe does make you happy, right?"
"Yeah." was Beca's simple answer, nodding along as she said it. "It's so strange, it was just like all of a sudden, the universe decides to throw her onto my path. Like 'Bam!' there she was at the quad and then that whole shower incident and then –"
"Shower incident?" Dr. Mitchell asked conflicted and confused at catching that. Confused on what it was all about and conflicted on whether he wanted to know or not.
"I said that out loud, didn't I?" Beca said in some sort of monotonous tone, realizing her blunder but still somewhat trying to hide it.
"I'm guessing I don't want to know?"
"Yeah." was Beca's short reply.
"Okay then, but yeah. I can be the cool dad." Dr. Mitchell then said with a shrug.
Beca shook her head. "Don't ever call yourself cool. Doesn't work that way. But, you are fine with all of this?"
"Beca, I'm just glad you're opening up to me about this. You're young Beca, you'll still discover a lot of things about yourself you've never even known, some of them might surprise you. What matters is that you are true to yourself, never compromise who you are for anything or anyone. Your mom?"
"Haven't talked to her yet." Beca replied and her dad's smile turned into a grin upon realizing Beca talked to him first. "Oh don't flatter yourself, I have to deal with the step-dad along with her."
"I'm surprised you haven't developed a name for him like the one you call Sheila. Like Darth father perhaps?"
"That's sort of you."
"Touche." Dr. Mitchell replied.
"Speaking of the step-monster though… will she freak out? I mean, I'm pretty sure she wanted to set me up with a friend's son."
"Ah, well, that might be tricky." Dr. Mitchell said with a tight-lipped smile. "I think it'll eventually settle down on her once you introduce Chloe as you're girlfriend, but if it doesn't, who cares? Right? Again, what matters is that you're happy. The fallout, if any, I'll deal with. I'm the one married to her. What matters now is you go get your girl."
"Thanks." Beca said with a genuine smile. For the first time in her life, she actually had a decent conversation with her dad, one that lifted her spirits and cleared her head and…
…and Beca realized they were finally on the right path of building a real relationship with each other.
Despite their own fallout. Despite all the debris that had fallen on them and damaged the relationship from the house that crumbled when he left.
And that's when Beca understood, sometimes people, and sometimes relationships, they fall apart to become new again. They get torn and scarred to be better, they withstand the toughest of storms, bend to the wills of the wind, so that one day they can stand better than ever. They get pieced back together, scars heal, they fall apart and they become more beautiful than ever.
Beca was ready to leave after an hour more of talking about things. Luke, Amy and Stacie's shenanigans. Emily's visit – although she hasn't exactly arrived yet – and Jesse's progress at trying to make it up to her about being the best 'dude bro' ever – a title he decided to settle upon himself.
"Beca, one last piece of advice before you leave, although I think you already know what it means." Dr. Mitchell said as they both made their way to the door of the house. "It doesn't matter who you love or who you end up with. It doesn't matter what comes next or how many more storms you'll face. Love someone who's worth the pain, and never let that person go."
Beca smiled. "That's one hell of an advice."
"I suppose it is."
"Thanks dad. I mean it." Beca then said giving him a quick hug. It was brief, but it was progress.
The walk back to Luke's apartment where they were all planning to camp out with Emily's visit was a little long, but with everything still dancing around in her mind. But slowly she could feel that the storm clouds were rolling away. Spring was coming along with bright new days.
Beca fished for her phone in her pocket and dialed her mom. She figured it was also now or never.
She already adored Chloe from all of the stories Beca kept telling her during their talks on the phone the past few months.
The only thing left is to actually fight and go get the girl.
"So what was that about last night? The brokenhearted thing going on with Beca? Is she still not talking with Chloe?" Jesse asked while walking with Amy towards Luke's apartment. He was glad his nightmarish trials were over and was genuinely curious as to what was going on. "Where are we headed anyways?"
"Well, since you're part of the fold now J-man, we're going to Luke's apartment. Beca's cousin's dropping by for a visit for a few days. We're mostly just going to hang out but, who knows, we might strike up a plan to get those two out of their stubborn heads and make out."
"Don't you mean make up? You know from whatever the reason behind them not talking is?"
"Make up, make out, what's the difference?" Amy shrugged and Jesse chuckled. H
"Yeah, I suppose." Jesse agreed. "What are they fighting about anyways?"
"I have a theory, and by theory I meant the only possible explanation to all of this, that it's because of you. Stacie agrees, you know. Red might've seen you kiss Beca, and now every time she sees you with her, she thinks you're dating. Doesn't help that our fearless leader kept driving that idea home to Red."
"Wait, hold up." Jesse said suddenly halting. Was it… no… he was responsible for this?
Amy stopped and looked back giving Jesse a sad smile. Jesse was never exactly one who hides his emotions, he always wears his heart on his sleeves, and right now, his heart feels the guilt of knowing that he messed things up beyond what he thought was possible.
He cared for Beca, he really did, and he might've misread things, but it was never his intention to place her in this predicament. It was never his intention to make things bad between her and Chloe or cause a misunderstanding.
Some friend he was.
"Look Jesse, maybe Stacie still blames you a little for all this mess but at the end of the day it's those two at the center of things. If they didn't want this miscommunication between them to make things worse they should talk. So don't blame yourself."
"Yeah, but I still get that a part of this is my fault, and I do get why they haven't talked to each other too. It's hard. I may be a hit or miss with Beca sometimes but I do know that she finds it hard to open up to people, especially regarding her feelings. And what's the hardest thing to do but tell the truth? Tell someone you love them?"
"You're not a bad guy Jesse, don't beat yourself up too much about it." Amy said. "Maybe a little, because you did do your part."
Jesse nodded thoughtfully but with a final knowledge of what he's done comes a renewed determination of making things right. He thought before that pursuing Beca when she wasn't interested was all that he's done wrong. Now he understands fully, he stepped in between two people who should be together in the first place. He wasn't being the best friend character in a movie, he was the complication, the villain. And that was totally unforgivable.
And Jesse might've just gotten the most dangerous idea he could potentially have.
It was great to be back. Luke was talking outside his apartment with Stacie when Emily got dropped off. Apparently, they saw Matt out with his girlfriend as they left for their trip. Once again, the apartment was all theirs for the taking and Emily was definitely looking forward to see the Bellas again, see Chloe, and hang out with her favorite people.
But boy has the picture of his short stay totally different from what she was expecting.
In the first hour since her arrival, Stacie brought her up to speed with what had happened after the Bellas fallout, after they made things up. She thought the 'punishment' for Tom was brilliant but her heart was breaking for Beca and Chloe.
She heard about Beca's hand and something punching a guy but she didn't know about them not talking to each other.
"But I just don't understand. Why aren't they…" Emily piped up while sitting in the living room with Luke and Stacie, munching on some cookies when Jesse and Amy finally arrived.
"It was him! Blame him!" Stacie exclaimed although it was clear from her tone that she meant it as a partial joke.
Jesse looked at Stacie confused before turning to Emily. "Oh hey, yeah, I think I remember you. Emily right?"
"Who are you?" was Emily's innocent reply. For the life of her, she couldn't remember who the guy was.
"I'm Jesse, a friend of Beca's." Jesse chirruped.
"If you're a friend then why did you mess up the magic between Chloe and Beca?" Emily threw back still upset by the news, catching Jesse of guard.
Jesse looked conflicted and torn and guilty as he sat right next to her with Amy right behind him. He was about to say something when they heard the door bursting open with an incredibly flustered Beca tumbling in. "Emily! Will you please explain why my mom thinks that I'm already dating Chloe!?"
Emily instantly froze. She was already off to a bad start and now she's in trouble for her misunderstanding from her last visit.
Although technically it wasn't a misunderstanding, she just jumped forward many steps.
Like ten million steps ahead.
Yeah, totally not what she was expecting at all.
The week had gone by relatively fast.
But then again, her stay at Barden was going by even quicker for Beca.
"So, have you thought about it?" Jesse asked on their way to the radio station for their intern duties.
"Thought about what?" Beca asked, although she could already see where Jesse was going with this. She had a week to clear her head and make up a game plan, a week to just take a break from it all – her studies and the sudden colorful drama of her life – and a week to just be. Beca knew, she had to fight for Chloe if she wanted to be with her. And she can't do it without a solid plan.
She's had her fun with Emily, Luke, Stacie, and Amy. Jesse too now that he's been sort of initiated into their little group from what Beca could tell. She's found a new fighting spirit, a new vigor for life to take on the challenges up ahead.
"I had a week to think about it too." Jesse said thoughtfully. "Amy might have pointed out that Chloe might've seen me kiss you and everything after that just sort of led to miscommunication and misdirection on what was totally happening. I've been trying to make it up but I'm afraid I've made things worse Beca. I want to apologize again."
Beca stopped on her tracks as she listened to what Jesse had to say, lightbulbs lighting up in her head as she connected the dots.
"She was… of course… ugh, why was I such an idiot! Jess, I think I have a plan… what exactly that entails, I still don't know. But yeah, I get it now. The whole misunderstanding." Beca said, running a hand through her hair.
"Well, shouldn't you be going to get the girl now or something?" Jesse asked. "For what it's worth, I think Chloe loves you very much Beca."
"Yeah, but the question is, does she think loving me is worth the pain?"
"Do you?"
"Of course I do." Beca replied adamantly and Jesse smiled.
"Then I think you have all the answer you need. I think I get it, why Chloe isn't talking to you. It's taking every bit of strength, a great amount of courage for Chloe to face you with a smile on her face now despite the fact that deep down her heart is breaking thanks to all this misunderstanding. It's agony Beca, it's a bittersweet agony and what Chloe needs now is for you not to give up and prove her wrong from her assumptions." Jesse said with his usually boyish grin. "If I could do anything without making things worse, I would. But I think it's your move now. So if you need any help, I am here for you Beca. I support you! Don't give up on her."
Beca nodded, spring was definitely coming and with it a new day.
But the day in the here and now wasn't over just yet.
Beca's phone started buzzing the moment she and Jesse picked up their pace to head to the radio station. Students were all starting to roll in, their spring break over and reality once setting in.
But what Beca wasn't expecting was for reality to catch up to her relatively fast as she received a text message from the last person she ever expected.
"Jess, I have to go." Beca said with a worried look in her eyes as she quickly ran towards the opposite direction they were headed. "Tell Luke it's an emergency!" she yelled right back leaving a confused Jesse behind.
"I'm impressed Mitchell. Didn't think you'd run all the way here considering you hated cardio." Aubrey commented as she took a sip of her drink at the little coffee shop at the University Hospital.
"How's Chloe? Is she okay? Is everything alright?" Beca asked while huffing as she tried to catch her breath, pulling up a chair across Aubrey.
"I don't know, I haven't exactly seen her since she left for Spring Break. We had a fight."
"Oh. Well, how did you know she was here?"
"I called her parents. Apparently she had her surgery scheduled for her nodes today. It's a simple procedure so I expect things would turn out fine." Aubrey replied, not trying to hide her frustrations at Chloe for not telling her about this. "I figured you'd want to know so I texted you."
"Thanks. I guess." Beca replied uncertainly and Aubrey couldn't help but notice that things were definitely still tense between them. She wanted that to stop.
She didn't hate Beca.
She hated that she knew that the munchkin had a power over Chloe, that she could hurt her in a way that Aubrey knew she wouldn't be able to do much about anything. And while it was sort of clear Beca wouldn't purposefully do anything like that, her obliviousness at times was a danger that she knew was unavoidable.
And she might've hated the fact that Beca was right at times and she was too blind of her own ambitions to listen to her.
But one thing was clear, whatever Chloe meant to her, she definitely cared. And that was enough for Aubrey, at least for now. "Care for a drink? My treat."
"Will you poison the drink?" Beca asked with a hint of sarcasm I her tone.
"At least you're already in a hospital." Aubrey quipped, standing up and getting Beca something. When she returned, Beca looked deep in thought and Aubrey could only guess why.
Aubrey handed Beca her drink which she cautiously accepted. "I don't think I've ever apologized for the pain I caused you." Aubrey said as she cleared her throat, braving to take a step forward by accepting her mistakes.
"I didn't exactly make it easy for you to like me." Beca replied. "I think I should apologize too. I know I'm not perfect Aubrey, and I make it hard for people sometimes to get me."
"Yeah, you do." Aubrey replied with a smirk of her own. "But I do too, so I guess we can call it quits?"
"Is this a truce?"
"I suppose it is Mitchell." Aubrey said thoughtfully. "I think you should know, Chloe doesn't hate you Beca. She's just hurting, heartbroken. She thinks you're with Swanson. Nope, she's not mad at you, she just wants to mend her broken heart before she can even face you again. She wants you to be happy."
Beca groaned. "But there's nothing going on between Jesse and me!" she grunted, tired of having to repeat other same thing to people over and over again.
"I get that now." Aubrey replied and Beca gave her a questioning look. "Swanson has been trying to prove that point to me the past couple of days, following me everywhere, it's quite annoying actually. But I mean if he's willing to die to do just that and prove the point, I figure…" Aubrey explained and it was clear to Beca was surprised to hear about what Jesse was trying to do. "Huh, I figured you'd know." Aubrey mumbled more to herself before getting back to her point. "But Chloe, she doesn't exactly see it that way, and we haven't exactly talked. Besides, even if you aren't with him, it doesn't matter who it is, you're going to love someone else."
"No I won't." Beca said in an adamant tone.
"What?"
"No I won't. I only love one person Aubrey, I'll always only love her." Beca declared with determination in her eyes and with such passion in her tone that it caught her off guard.
"I'm in love with her. I'm in love with Chloe." Beca then continued to say, more to herself than Aubrey, as if it was the first time she was hearing herself say it, out loud at the very least.
"You're only actually realizing this now, at exactly this moment?" Aubrey asked to clarify what was going on and Beca gave out a nervous laughter as she nodded.
"Well, technically I've been realizing it the past week, but that is the first time I said it out loud. Of course you just had to be the person who hears it." Beca chuckled.
"If it helps, I think I might be falling for Stacie but I've been fighting it off." Aubrey then found herself admitting, feeling more and more comfortable with talking to Beca.
"It does." Beca replied with a smirk.
"Shut up munchkin."
"Let's just agree we're both idiots?" Beca then offered up.
"Alright, I agree that you're an idiot." Aubrey replied as she took a sip of her coffee, Beca quirking an eyebrow at her. "Fine, I suppose I am too."
Beca gave a satisfied smile before standing up to excuse herself. "Aren't you going to see her?" Aubrey asked noting that Beca was about to leave.
"I will. Eventually. I came here because I was worried, but right now I have to figure out what to do."
"To woo Chloe? I'd venture a guess that not much." Aubrey replied. "But it wouldn't hurt your chances if you do some grand gesture. I think we both agree that Chloe deserves so much more."
"Much, much more." Beca replied.
Aubrey found herself once again sitting as she watched the tiny brunette leave, her heart feeling a little bit lighter.
At least that was one thing she had the chance to clear up and make right. If only she could do something about all her other past mistakes.
Aubrey was deep in her own thoughts when her phone rang, an unexpected call.
And her heart leapt as she heard the news.
Broken dreams and wasted chances were in the past, now was the time to mend the bridges that were burned and save whatever she could save, and Aubrey knew it was an uphill battle.
But she was willing to fight, this time around with a different approach. She's learned her lesson.
The Bellas were going to Nationals.
And this time, Aubrey told herself, they were going to do it the right way.
Song in the chapter: 'Coming Home' by Diddy ft. Skylar Grey; Title of chapter based on 'I Can Barely Say' by The Fray
PS: My heart goes out to the victims and those affected by the massacre that happened in Orlando. I think it's terrible that every time I tune into the news I hear another number, the latest number, of casualties. Too many people are dying, the question is how many people must die before we realize we all have the right to live?
To those in the area, I encourage you to donate blood as it is greatly needed. And those who aren't, let your voices be heard. Who knows? We might actually be able to change something.
