A/N: Welcome to Souls of Fire, I ran out of spicy chips to make clever comments about.

Sadly I've recently lost a favorite and follower :( if quality is going down, I'd like to hear.

Thank you to my diligent reviewers :D always taking the time to read this, totally not being held at soda-point. Azure, Thunderwolf, and ItsJustCrow, thanks a ton for your support! (Wherever the rest of the reviewers went, I miss you guys)

Enjoy!

The room felt so cold, the authority of the ALF bearing down like a press. My answer came clear, but it was bitter for my heart. I looked back to the girl I once called friend and foe. Nodding, I kept my breath as quiet as possible.

Haru's gaze softened, thinking she knew my answer. Just looking back down at her, I remembered it all. The night of wolves she helped me survive, finding her that S class herb. Just as her spirits calmed, that's when I grabbed her arm.

"What're you doing?!" Haru shrieked, "Garr?!"

"I'm...sorry, Haru."

"No!" she begged, "Please don't, you're my only friend!"

I tugged her towards the authorities, my arms cold with goosebumps. The helmet guarded sight of my face, hiding what would've been so obvious had I been open.

"I helped you!" Haru shrieked, "Why would you do this!?"

"Authority...must be respected." I stuttered, "I don't mean you any harm."

"Liar!" she roared, "You're still mad that I called you stupid!? You sick, vindictive...ugh!"

Haru grabbed my armor covered arms, clawing at me as I tore her freedom away. I couldn't even open my eyes, only keep marching despite her screams. She was out of grenades, and her staff would've been useless to stop me at these ranges.

"Let me go!" she screamed, "Please, Garr! I'm sorry!"

She pulled, forcing me to floor her. Knocking her to the ground, I gripped her by the wrists before continuing. Presenting the ALF with their prey, I lowered my head. She was my friend...I told her she could come with us. I broke my word as a man, damnable.

The regally armored Kibaou smiled, nodding to Anthem.

"You're an honorable man, Garr." Kibaou nodded, "Thank you for helping us rid a criminal from our streets."

I said nothing, holding Haru down as Anthem took hold. Looking up at me with glowing yellow eyes, I could feel the despair...but had no clear answer. The leather gauntlets of Anthem took hold of her arm.

The black hatted greatswordsman glared at me, hate filling his eyes.

"Betraying your friends...that's a new low for you, or is it?"

I said nothing, riposted by the pikes of shame. Raising a strange dark blue crystal, his order was clear.

"Corridor, open." Anthem called.

I've heard that command before. In an instant, I was a man in black...the same kids who kidnapped me and threw me through a portal. Watching the red cloaked pyro vanish, I felt like I was choking.

"You're not going to torture her...are you?" I peeped.

"Excuse me?" Kibaou raised a brow.

I fell silent, unsure how to respond.

"He was tortured..." Rika boldly confronted.

"Really now?" Kibaou inquired her, "Got any evidence?"

Drawing a letter, the blacksmith used [Item Appraisal].

"This sicko tore all of his skin off." Rika growled, "When his Pain Absorbers are turned off!"

Gasps left a few in the background, whispers of my old 'Cursed Man' title. Kibaou took the letter, his eyes darting along to examine.

"Wow...that's...messed up." he grimaced, "Left his name on the letter...item appraisal proves it wasn't a forgery either."

"Will that suffice?" she questioned.

"Yea..." Kibaou nodded, "Definitely putting a warrant for that one. You don't mind if I keep this, do you?"

"No." she stated.

"Sir." Anthem growled, "I wanna duel him...finish this."

"Denied." Kibaou ordered, "That wouldn't be respectful to our helper."

"You think he's gonna help you?" Anthem argued, "Sir, that man's going to be a Pk'er, mark my words!"

It all felt like a sick joke. Nobility, what was that? Some notion that I'd do good when others wouldn't, that turned into a lie. Hearing the harsh cries of revenge from Anthem, I felt a spark. It wasn't so much that I wanted to fight, it was just familiar. Comfortable even.

To hear others exclaiming their rage towards me, it all felt strangely easing. I hated that, it wasn't supposed to be that way. Standing there in that empty throne room, that animosity brought me back to reality.

I had to surrender Haru, for my own sake. The more I thought about it I realized, Rika needed my help in Floor Six. I couldn't do that if I didn't earn my name back with the same people who made a stronghold out of her domain.

Still, I felt so sick of myself.

"I don't think so." Kibaou snapped, "I see an honest guy willing to do what's right."

"Are you blind?" the swordsman growled, "He killed my brother over a sword!"

"You need to let go, Anthem. Yuri scammed your brother into going bounty hunting."

"And you with your pride!" Anthem decried, "Captain Derek was right, it's all about you."

"Say that again..." Kibaou's voice lowered.

Anthem fell silent, looking at Kibaou with a submissive expression.

"Go ahead." Kibaou snarled, "I wanna hear that righteous indignation...judging me when you've never had to make such decisions."

Continuing the act of silence, Anthem withdrew his stance. The spike haired commander turned back to me, sighing with irritation.

"Thank you for your help, Garr." Kibaou commended softly, "You saved our medic, and helped us succeed in our mission."

I nodded politely.

"I hope I didn't interfere, sir."

"Ha, far from it!" Kibaou applauded, "Heck man! You stood up to a colored knight on your own!"

"I've never seen a guy do that, and I lead a clearing force!"

All of these accolades, they would've felt so much nicer if I didn't do that.

"It was a mission." I replied softly, "I couldn't let others suffer."

"And a noble heart. It leads me to ask," Kibaou sheathed his cutlass, "Perhaps...you would like to join us?"

Anthem's eyes lit, as if he was betrayed by his master.

"You'd rise through the ranks pretty quick!" the commander crossed arms.

"Thank you." I sighed.

"Listen man, if you join us? I can boost you to the rank of Sergeant. That means weekly income...and status."

That snapped me out of momentary angst. Weekly pay and a position in a pretty prominent guild? With that, I could get inside the northern mines Rika spoke of...I could save her business. Even if I couldn't though, the extra income would benefit us.

Top it off...people would call me by military rank, something I always wanted. Sergeant Garr, I liked that...no Chief Master Sergeant. Sergeant Major? I wanted it. Looking at Rika, she seemed absolutely excited. The flicker in her eyes cheered me on, she saw progress for her dream. Done.

"I'll take the offer when I'm ready." I looked back, "Any time limit on that, sir?"

"Nah," Kibaou waved, "Just send me a message."

"Can she join with me?"

"Course! The more the merrier. Might even get the mining guilds she's influenced to unify."

"I'll see to it then." I nodded, "I'll let you know soon."

"Excellent!" Kibaou clapped, "Will be happy to have you join us."

With that, they warped away. The moment of potential glory was gone, leaving only the lingering sting of decisions. Haru, one of the first if not only friends I made...I threw to the wolves. Why, because it would benefit me...us. The warmth of Rika's gloved hand gripped mine moments later.

"You did very well." she whispered, "I'm...sorry about Haru."

I gripped her hand snugger, my eyes stuck to the ground.

"I feel terrible." I mourned, "Betraying Haru..."

"Try to remember." she gripped my hand. "She was gonna set you on fire!"

"It's just..."

Loosing my hand from her grasp, I removed the helmet from my head. She had to see my face, lies weren't welcome. She smiled slightly, feeling my face after removing a gauntlet.

"I didn't like doing that. From where I'm standing, it was all a mistake."

"So why do it?" her pink hair stroked past her eyes. "You did the right thing to me."

"...Because I...wanted favor."

"Huh?"

"If I can get a ranked position among them? I could help you in Floor Six."

"So you're saying you sacrificed your friend for my sake?"

"No!" I decried, "I meant..."

I stopped, realizing where I was going.

"I'm sorry." I tried defusing. "I'm just...being emotional."

"It's okay," she grabbed my hand again, "It's been a long day for us."

"That doesn't excuse my little act earlier though," I growled.

She looked at me with a somber expression.

"Seriously?! Nearly hitting you?" I ranted, "God! What kind of animal am I!?"

I swerved, breathing deep as I raged against myself.

"Even if you did." Rika reasoned, "Did you see me?"

"...No." I answered, "I was somewhere else."

"What were you seeing?"

I turned back to her in respect.

"The alley." I sighed, "The place I was taken..."

"Hm." she blinked, "What triggered it exactly?"

"When you sprayed sand in my face." I noted, "Think it might've something to do with the paralysis potion memory."

"Hmm...good to know."

"You're acting like this is something you should deal with!" I cried, "Rika, I'm not going to burden you with...that!"

"Why not?!" she challenged, "What, you think I'm someone that's just gonna bolt from you the second things go bad?"

I fell silent.

"That hurts." she whined, "You just assume things that aren't true...even when I try to show you that!"

"And you just think I'm some kind of superhero!" I complained, "What gives with that?"

Her rouge eyes watered, her tenderness unfolding.

"You just..." I slowed in pain, "Think I'm a good person...well wasn't that proof to you?"

Rika's tears struck me like a sledgehammer, stopping my advance. Despite the position, I was the one who collapsed.

"You tell me all the time how good I am." I sobbed, "Ignoring my faults like they don't exist!"

"I'm not ignoring them." Rika groaned.

"Then why won't you judge me?!" I glanced back, "Why won't you just..."

I stopped myself, sitting down to reclaim emotional control. This...wasn't going to last. It was our first kiss, yet here I was...a whiny submissive dog.

"I'm sorry..." I gasped, "It's just so painful. I hate knowing what I did, it makes me wanna just...take it back."

Stepping beside me, my pink haired princess sat.

"I want to be a good boyfriend." I whined, "Not some sappy sob story for you to carry around."

"I'm willing to do what it takes..."

"I know." she stepped in front, "Let me help you."

God, I couldn't hide my emotions to save my soul.

"You helped me when I suffered." Rika hugged, "Why shouldn't I?"

"Because...you don't need me."

"What?"

"The truth is?" I teared up, "I'm the one slowing you down. I'm the one filled with overly sensitive bullshit!"

"What're you talking about?"

"I claim to be the muscle of the couple," I breathed, "Yet I'm always the one that needs saving."

"You're making stuff up now." she argued, "We've made it here because we have each other."

I shook my head, trying to wipe clean the waters of disdain from my face.

"I mean...you remember that night? Floor two, the mithril hunt?"

"Yea?" I wept.

"If you hadn't gone out there? I would've never gotten that metal."

"You went till morning out there, risking it all just for me." Rika glared, "And yet you insult me by calling yourself worthless."

"How does that insult you?" I inquired, "I'm assessing myself."

"Because this isn't about you anymore. You wanted it that way, didn't you?"

I nodded in reply.

"Then why didn't you pick Asuna?" she brought up, "I mean she's a warrior, she's more like you than I am!"

"I'm not looking for myself." I choked.

"Then what're you looking for with me?" her eyes lit.

"...Someone who counters my weaknesses."

"I'm so flawed..." I admitted, "You're right. I do assume things, I just pretend I know the answer."

Her expression calmed, sitting back down with me.

"I want to improve." I leaned on her, "It's just hard sometimes."

"I see how things are with you." she sighed, "You've...made quite a few enemies in your time."

She giggled a little.

"You fit in this place like a battle tank in a parking garage."

She elbowed me.

"And dammit, I like that about you." she smiled, "You don't try to fit in."

I laughed weakly, enjoying her joke as she embraced.

"It reminds me a lot of my time growing up." her heart beat against my chest.

"Really?" I hiccuped, "Why would you have enemies though? You're beautiful, sweet and smart."

"Yea." she nodded, "Well when you learn how to prank, you make a few mistakes."

I giggled a little.

"They had to know you were kidding." I counseled.

"When everyone's got a pole up their ass?" Rika smiled slightly. "Plus the whole being half Scottish in a pure Japanese society?"

"Trueee." I shrugged, "I wanna hear your story on that."

"Later," she snuggled, "Promise."

I nodded.

"You there..." a stray voice croaked.

We turned to the source. Sitting there on the throne was another skeletal fish, just as dead as the others we faced. Looking at us, it beckoned Rika and I closer.

"I'm...just warning you." the skeleton told, "The mechanism he turned...it cannot be undone."

"What mechanism?" Rika peeked around him, "All I see are some glowing signs."

"The barrier our people set to keep the Great Old Ones away."

"Oh great." I groaned, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Creatures beyond your understanding will take form in the unexplored corners of Aincrad. If you do not hold them back, their gods will return and rule again!"

"Oh joy!" I dripped sarcasm, "What're we talking about here? Cthulhu?"

"Yes."

I stopped, looking back at Rika for a second.

"You're...serious." I glanced back.

"Course I am!" the dead king shouted, "I haven't sat here for millennia to crack a joke!"

"How's his speech so advanced?" Rika questioned, "He seems awfully receptive for an NPC."

"Sorry Rika, kinda lost it all with the whole 'Arrival of freaking Cthulhu' part." I blinked, "When though?"

"When the stars are right, when enough is spilled." The king ranted, "Then he and the other eight will rise."

This day was just getting better and better. I was already being all emotional about this stuff, before realizing I and everyone around me was at risk of getting owned by the king of monsters himself!

"How will we know?" I hesitated

"Beware of unusual powers," the king sighed, "While they may benefit you...they will bring about their will."

"What do you mean?" Rika questioned, "That's so vague, it's irritating."

"Magic, spell casting...self enhancement. It'll be offered as rewards for service."

"Aw, come on!" she whined, "I want magic!"

"You'd only be helping them." The king warned.

"Hey, they might be chiller than the edgelords we've been dealing with." she shrugged.

In the end, it all meant one thing. PoH was gonna get stronger, the last thing we friggin needed. The prospect of magic being gifts from these beings, however, made for an intriguing ideal. Just as I looked to keep asking, my blacksmith dragged me away from the throne room.

"I'm taking you somewhere nice." Rika said, "This is just a wee bit insane."

"Where?" I stepped beside her.

"Floor Seventeen." she directed, "It's a tropical island zone...you know, for the week of our three month-vversary?"

"A week?" I blinked, "That's a long ti-"

"You need this." she quipped, "We'll get back to it when you're ready."

I was in no position to ignore my mental state, I followed her wishes.

Souls of Fire

January 10th 2023

Floor Seventeen, it was truly a gift from the maker of this deathtrap. Like Floor Five there was ample sunlight, but it was dampened heavily by the ocean air currents. Surrounding us, tropical islands dotted the sapphire blue waters. Waters so clear that it let us see the very corals resting below.

"So what did you see?" Rika inquired softly, "You can tell me anything."

Sitting in the beach, the pink haired blacksmith gently embraced me as the waves lapped our toes. Every time the water pulled back, I'd feel the Hellcat tearing off the skin. Jerking them away from the cool fluid, I groaned in frustration.

"It's...me." I sighed, "I keep seeing myself without a name..."

"Why wouldn't you have a name?" Rika stroked my unguarded knuckles.

"Because Nobel took it."

I felt my skin tenderly, smiling a little.

"It's still there, I'm still there."

Rika frowned a little, kissing me on the cheek.

"So when you were in that dream, where were you?"

"The alley." I noted, "Was surrounded by guys cloaked in black. They were reaching to take me away."

"Ohhhh." she nodded, "Now I get why you were fighting."

"He was there too..." I sighed, "Couldn't find him, but he kept talking."

"Do you remember what he said to you?" she snuggled, "You...were yelling about something."

"Yes." I answered quickly, "He was telling me he owned everything..."

"Everything was his...my skin, my name, my dignity..."

"Well he's a liar." she growled, "He could never hope to be as strong as you!"

"By letting him talk you down?" she jabbed, "You're forfeiting what makes you special."

"I hear you in your sleep." Rika smiled, "You wanna be a god slayer someday."

"I do." I looked, "It's something I wanted ever since that night."

"It fascinates me." she compiled, "How could you feel that way, yet still follow one?"

"Because the one I follow doesn't need me." I answered. "...and he teaches us peace."

"Hm..." Rika tilted her head, "I'm pretty much undecided when it comes to those things. I mean, there's so many questions I would."

"Like?" I turned.

"Why us? Aren't angels so much better?"

"That's actually untrue." I smiled a little, "You see, there's something people have that put us above such celestial things."

She looked with some curiosity.

"Free thought." I nodded proudly, "They're just windup toys, thoughtless in following His wishes."

"We on the other hand? We choose what we do, follow, or believe."

I rested against her slightly.

"Free thought's the greatest gift in the universe, for it gives us as a species a chance to be more than just a carbon construct."

"Like making porn?" she smirked.

"You would know."

"Excuse me!?" she piped.

"You heard me." I giggled.

"I'm the girl in this relationship!" she dismayed, "You're supposed to be the horn dog!"

"Makes you unique, right?"

Rika slapped my back.

"Where'd you get sass like that?" she teased.

"I learned from the best."

Rika smiled, nodding as she rested back on me.

"Good answer..."

She tugged me, keeping our bodies close. The seagulls laughed in the distance, mocking me for my open weakness. The cackles brought me back to Floor Two, my humiliating defeat by the gang. I could almost hear the chains of that flail ring, striking my thigh bones.

"You wimp...there's no pain in this game!"

"It's poetic isn't it? To feel in a world of the unfeeling?"

More laughter.

"Hun?"

"Sorry...was hearing them again."

"Come on." she coaxed, "There's something I wanna show you."

I nodded, rising to join her on the walk. Reaching a nearby cliff, I kept several feet back from the edge.

"You see the islands?" Rika pointed.

"Oh yes." I nodded, "That gets me thinking one word."

"Hm?"

"Volcanoes." I distracted myself, "Means minerals...ore that'd be difficult to find."

"You read my mind!" she cheered. "But...that isn't what I wanted to point out today."

"Oh?" I looked

"Look how far they are. Does it bother you?"

"A little, but that's nothing a boat couldn't fix."

"That's how you need to see this." she grabbed my hand.

"No matter how far the end of this may look...you'll always have a name in my heart."

I looked back at her.

"Incorrect. You're an expendable asset. Once you're of no use to her, you will be left behind."

"Aid?"

"Thank you." I held Rika, "I just...need faith in myself."

"You will. Whether your see it or not, you are a king."

Souls of Fire

January 11th 2023

The warm waters of the ocean enveloped us, swallowing us like pebbles on the stream. Rika's words yesterday kept repeating, reminding me to see the good in myself. It felt so hard to believe though, knowing what I've done. But was it wrong? I was looking out for our interests.

The coral reef below welcomed us to a garden of life. Great pillars of rock peaked from the sandy base, covered top to bottom in brightly colored corals. Fish swam from the innumerable channels. Rika directed me towards the bottom, our feet landing on the soft sand.

Looking back at her, she mouthed the words "Do you trust me?" I nodded, smiling a little. That second, Rika pulled me close, our lips sharing the air we held dear. This kiss felt different, our mouths locking. It felt...rather sensual.

It didn't have the same feel as the first kiss. It wasn't powerful, but that's just a sign of getting used to it. While I missed the immediate electric pulse, I craved for what the adaption would mean for us. Our [Air Meter] ticked away, reminding us we couldn't stay.

I was in love with Rika, I really was. She's been there with me since the first days of this world, helping each other conquer things we wouldn't have otherwise. She had every reason to let me go, but she chose to stay and help. That was the drug I was unfamiliar to, compassion.

Releasing ourselves, I smiled like a complete idiot. Grinning back at me, her rouge eyes glimmered in the water broken light. Her hair floated and parted with the tides, leaving her in an almost dreamy appearance.

We swam through the coral reef just outside [Drakuwai], the coastal town of this floor. Bright yellow flattops held up like platters, their hundreds of little beads swaying in the tide. The appendages of anemones stretched, some a bright orange, others a deep royal purple.

Rays of sunlight broke against the water's surface, refracting like a broken mirror on the denizens below. The shimmering of that brilliant star made the deep victory red of a few tree-like corals just so enticing. All of the color, it just...mesmerized me.

Fish swam past us, busy with their own affairs. Watching a school twirl around Rika as it passed, her pink hair fluttering from the current they drew, I was happy. She was absolutely having a blast watching them go, moving her arms and legs as they danced around.

Despite all of our bliss, the meter flashed, telling us it was time to go. I stroked her arm, pointing to the glassy sky. Going back to the world we knew, our eyes kept looking down to the saturated realm we'd call a reef. This was our third dive.

I gasped, feeling the air pressing against my cheeks

"Ugh!" Rika smiled, brushing the hair from her face, "I wish we didn't have a damn air meter."

"Trueee." I swept droplets from my brow, "Could lose myself down there."

We left for the beach, abandoning the reef. Walking along the shoreline, we kept close to town for Safe Zone protections. The sun shined down, the coastal breeze keeping our near bare bodies cool.

Rika recently bought a two piece for the occasion. White with red stripes, it had this tomboyish pirate theme. A little see through red skirt hung around the waist, bobbing with her every move. It gave an image I hadn't yet seen of my blacksmith, one I couldn't ignore.

Her breasts, they had a bit of bounce to them. A lump on the tummy, giving me the damn good sign that she actually ate food once in her life. All of her had this slight musculature.

"Huh...what's that." Rika suddenly bent over.

I stopped, watching features presented themselves. Started wondering how she'd feel against me. Realizing what I was seeing though, I glanced away in respect.

"Pervert. You just wanna get in her."

In all honesty, getting in was an interest. Thing was, I promised to only do it when I'm married.

"Never mind." she rose with a smile, "Thought there was a shell."

"You might've!" I exclaimed, "We could probably find one pretty easily out here."

"You seem a bit excited." Rika stretched her arms forward, "What's got you goin?"

Why. Why did she have to stretch that way? The motion pressed them both together, grabbing my gaze like a light show. Glancing back to her dark pink eyes, I blushed...knowing I was caught.

Rika said nothing, winking as she turned to keep walking. I had to talk, something to push away the immediate concern of my chivalry.

"So what was it like?" I inquired, "Growing up half Scottish?"

"Well," Rika glanced back, "For starters? Japan doesn't like freckles..."

"Why?" I raised a brow, "They look beautiful to me!"

"It's just our culture," she shrugged, "Gotta have super clean skin...the whiter the better."

"Eh?"

"Standards for girls." She explained, "We're always supposed to be quiet, unassuming and modest."

"Can only imagine how you fit in..." I grimaced, "You're fiery, passionate, and strong."

Spotting a seashell, I scrounged the calcium cup off the ground. A conch shell, pink in its coloration. Passing it to her, I let her marvel over the trinket.

"Being loud never helped. Had some people saying I was possessed, others a Yakuza adopted child."

"How dare they." I growled, "Couldn't take anyone being different."

"But that's what made my dad amazing." she smiled, "He'd always stand up for me."

"I respect that!" I commended, "I'd...love to meet your father."

"He'd like you." Rika brushed her hair, "Was always on about me finding a strong man."

She saw me as a strong soul? Even with everything I've done?

"Course don't tell him whatcha think of the accent." the smith chuckled, "He'll kill ya for that."

"Something tells me he would anyway." I joked.

"Reminds me when he was nearly jailed." she sighed, "All for my sake."

"What?!" I stopped, "Hold the phone! What?"

"That was a while ago." she explained, "Was like...twelve at the time?"

A nearby palm tree provided some shade, a few small crabs scuttling about as we sat against the tropical trunk.

"A guy was telling my father that I was trouble, out of control."

"Guess he likes his girls submissive." I groaned, "Seriously, why not hump a corpse then?"

"What?" she stopped.

"Submissive women to me are like corpses." I shrugged, "You can do plenty with them, tell them anything."

"Course just behind those eyes, you have no idea what thoughts could be lurking!"

"Well...you're definitely one to speak your mind." Rika grimaced.

"Sorry if I grossed you out." I irked.

"No." she rubbed her chin, "I was actually thinking about it...and I agree."

I loved the fact Rika was so honest. Seriously, I could tell her exactly how I felt about something and not worry.

"Anyway!" I shook my head, "You were saying?"

"About that guy. He said I was a monster, right?"

"Yea?" I looked eagerly.

"Dad was like, That what your parents used to call you?"

"Ohhhhh!" I bellowed, "Burrrrrrrrrrrrn!"

She laughed at my cheers, nodding happily.

"The guy just stared at him, eyes as big as baseballs." Rika guffawed, "Dad never liked weak guys."

Well, that whole not liking weak people sounded...familiar.

"The only thing I don't get?" I approached, "Why the harsh standards? I mean he's clearly protective of you."

"I don't know." Rika shrugged, "Maybe because he wants me to be better than him? Wish I could ask him about that."

"You'll get the chance." I answered. "Does he drink?"

"A little?" she shrugged, "He never gets drunk, he likes pale ales best."

"Remind me to get him one when we're out of this." I smiled.

"I'll try." Rika rested her head on my shoulder, "But yea, it made fitting in...difficult."

"It got so annoying..." she sighed, "They raise guys at home to be so delicate. Can't even talk to them, let alone rough around."

"With you?" Rika snuggled, "I can do all those things."

"You're a great guy, someone I...wished I could've met earlier."

"Likewise." I put an arm around, "Before I forget!"

Pulling that white and red flower again, I put the bud and stem in her hair...the blossom coming out on the side. Rika quickly drew her hand mirror, looking with gleeful surprise as she adjusted the flower on her head.

"It's beautiful!" she cheered.

"Thought you'd like that." I chirped, "It just...works!"

"It does!" Rika giggled, "Thank you."

Seeing her with that flower on the side, new thoughts crept in.

"Rika? I wanted to...talk about our careers."

"That's new and sudden." she blinked, "Something wrong?"

"No, I just...wanted to see how our interests would mesh when we're back home."

"Hmm." Rika brushed her bangs back. "Well you said you're gonna be a physical trainer or something?"

"Yea." I nodded, "Thing is, my focus in that career will be helping people who've lost their ability to move."

"Oooohh!" Rika smiled, "Well I wanna make prosthetic limbs for people. Build stuff to help them maintain a normal life."

"That's what I was thinking!" I grinned, "I'll have a job focused on helping them move again."

"Course, I...don't know how long I'm gonna need to get through school."

"I'm not worried." Rika assured, "Because even if our careers change? I wouldn't care, we've got a plan."

Souls of Fire

January 14th 2023

Another day on the beach. Nothing changed, I still feared the unseen. Rika's business continued to suffer, the ALF refusing to release their hold on Floor Six. I kept trying to tell her to let me go in and fix the situation, but she insisted on peaceful solutions.

That morning, she was away at another meeting. I had to find a solution, it couldn't be based on Rika either. If I wasn't stable on my own, then I would become overly needy. So I wandered the beach, seeking truth.

The sun looked so beautiful, basking the clear sea with its purity.

"How could you do this to me?..."

"I had to, Haru." I bit my lip, "I didn't plan on doing that."

"The only thing you do is destroy!"

That notion had me pinned. What was built up since my arrival? Then again, was I really that important in the grand scheme of things? Sure, I had strength...but that wasn't unique in the human race.

"Excuse me." I heard suddenly behind me.

I swerved, catching sight of a familiar face. Wearing that ALF uniform was the medic Rika and I rescued from the storm.

"I hope I'm not in the way." he spoke softly, "I don't think we've really introduced ourselves."

"We haven't." I admitted, "Good morning. Hope everything's alright."

"It has." He smiled, "I'm Graye...we've met before that day."

"Really?" I raised a brow.

"Yep...and I have to say, you're very different from the guy I met on day one."

I kept looking, unsure what he was saying.

"You remember the day Kayaba told us we're stuck? The railing around Aincrad?"

"Wait!" I raised a finger, "You're...him?"

He nodded.

"I remember you when you were an obnoxious brute...you still are."

"Would hope so!" I chuckled, "I like it simple and honest."

"But the way you handled that situation." he pointed out, "You kinda grew up."

"I try." I lowered my head, "I admit...being with Lisbeth made me sort of rethink some equations."

"I was wondering if I could help you." Graye brushed his brown cloak, "It's been a few days since we last met and you looked troubled."

The gesture felt very welcome. I nodded, waving for him to come along. Explaining the events to him, Graye was surprisingly calm and composed. While he wouldn't say much, his green eyes kept very attentive.

"Everywhere I go, I hear him claiming me." I looked to him, "I keep re-imagining the kidnapping."

"How exactly did they kidnap you?" Graye pondered, "You're definitely not weak...especially taking on threats meant for small parties by yourself."

"They paralyzed me using poison." I frowned, "Never felt so helpless in my life."

"Not to jump to conclusions." he stopped, "But you think that might be the core problem?"

"What?" I ceased.

"Helplessness? Being paralyzed? I know that feeling."

"How so?" I glanced, "You were with some pretty tough guys."

"...yeah." Graye sighed, "Let's just say there's a reason you found me out there."

"I'm glad I could." I smiled, "But...why were you? Would've thought protecting the medic would be critical."

"Not to Kibaou." he replied, "For him, the glory of bagging the Dragon was more important."

"Have you seen her?" I asked, "I was friends with the person you arrested some time ago."

"Yeah. Talked to her a few times...she's got issues too."

"Course." he shrugged, "She's got a chance of making it out in court...long as she skirts away from the 'attempted murder' issue."

"I highly doubt she really wanted to murder anyone." I assured, "She was just a guard for the real threat."

"We'll talk about that later." He addressed, "It's you I'm helping."

The discussion moved on from there. The conclusion was simple, but absolutely sensible. To defeat the nightmares and voices, I had to face them directly...to put myself back in the zone. Meditating on the sand, Graye put me to focus on the moment.

Water lapped against sand. A gentle breeze, running through me like a river of soul.

"Focus on breathing." he directed, "When you feel you're ready, take the sand and submerge."

I nodded, keeping my mind directed to the act of circulation. It felt...calming, I heard no voices. In the circus of a brain I had, the silence felt almost alarming.

"What do you hear?"

"The waves." I answered.

"Good." Graye commended, "Relax by the way, you're as stiff as a crystal."

I lowered my shoulders, unaware of their rigid state. Reminding myself of the good things, I felt a warmth steadily build. Looking ahead, I felt something I hadn't the whole week. Hope.

Souls of Fire

January 20th 2023

Ironback gleamed in the sun, whirring as I swung. It had to be the three hundredth slash, my shoulders were burning from the exertion of weight. The tip scattered sand, the weapon wobbling a bit in my hands.

"How can he even lift that?" Graye inquired, "The thing's almost as tall as he is!"

"Strength and determination." Rika answered, "...and a little compensation."

"Hey!" I shouted, "No need to remind me!"

Graye and Rika laughed, chatting about their problems with the ALF. I had to say, the medic was mixing in well with the two of us. The meditation process he showed me gave me peace. Sure I'd still hear voices talking every once in a while, but then I'd meditate it away.

Listening to the heavy blade crash against the beach, I felt momentary strength.

"Graye?" I shouldered Ironback, "Wanted to ask you something."

"Yes?" he glanced, soft on expression as usual.

"Could you join us? You've been a great help for me, and you're respectful to Lis."

He seemed rather nervous to the idea. We've already informed him of our mission, so this was to be expected. His messy brown hair blew in the wind, lighter in tone than my own.

"I mean I'll stay." Graye answered, "Not sure for how long, but I can try."

"So why did you leave the last group?" Rika elbowed, "Didn't expect to see you stealing my man."

"I...have my reasons." He stumbled from her hit, "Just felt I could help you guys more."

"Does this affect my chance of joining them?" I swung Ironback through the air, "I...think I'm almost ready."

"Not at all!" Graye smiled, "If anything, Kibaou's been pretty excited."

"Though I have to ask, what about your current mission?"

"It'll be handled as usual...gotta find him after I recover."

"Hey guys?" Rika smiled, "Gonna go meet up with friends for a bit."

"Alright, dear!" I nodded, "Nothing too wild, right?"

"Nothing I would apologize for." she winked, "Later!"

With that, the pink haired smith was gone.

"Graye? You can relax a bit, I'm gonna visit an old friend too."

"Oh?" he looked, "I mean I'd rather come along."

"That's fine too, heading over to the first floor."

Graye nodded, following behind me back to familiar sights.

Or at least I thought was familiar. While the same walls and meadows stood, the people seemed new. There wasn't fear in their eyes. If anything, vacancy had taken their minds. Some glanced at me, bearing that same pleasant expression.

Seeing the light smiles of strangers felt odd as we left town. They didn't know me, nor the things I've done. Yet, they still found time to show compassion. It's human nature to seek acknowledgement, we're social beings. I just...hoped I would be known for the good I intended someday. In all fairness, I wasn't the 'Cursed Man' or the 'Black Knight'. That alone was enough of a plus to put a smile on my face.

According to my friends list, Nishida was west of the Town of Beginnings. He hadn't replied to my messages, leaving me in the dark to what's going on. Graye remained pretty quiet, almost making me forget he was even there.

Feeling the grass stroke my legs, I remembered my first day with Haru. Herb hunting, her calling me basically the worst creation God ever made. Despite how belittling she was then, I couldn't stop wondering what she's been through since we last met.

A [Frenzy Boar] trotted by, munching at a random herb. I remembered fighting off a pack of these, hoping to get the alchemist an S class herb. Just giving the beast a [Front Kick] was enough to end its digitally generated existence. Ha, set the score straight in my book.

"I can't say I missed this place." Graye sighed, "I just wish...never mind. Being stupid."

"Wishing for things makes you stupid?" I glanced back.

"Wishing for stuff that'll never come true is."

"How do you know it wouldn't?"

"It just won't." he dismissed.

"Well fine." I groaned, "I won't ask again."

"Sorry, just feeling a bit depressed."

In the woods, we found a fairly unassuming log cabin. The menu told me this was the place, but it all felt strange. There wasn't a monster anywhere in sight, not a sound beyond the crunch of leave beneath my shoes. How'd he get out of that cave in the first place?

I approached the door, giving it a gentle knock. Not a sound from the other side.

"...Nishida?" I eased, "It's me, Garr."

Still nothing.

"You...haven't replied back to my message. Are you okay?"

Not a sound from the other side.

"I was hoping we could talk. Even if it's for a few minutes, I just wanted to know you're safe."

I heard the door knob twist, the barrier creaking open. On the other side, stood a small girl.

"Hello," she squeaked with her head tilted.

"Hi?" I glanced down.

This little thing had to be like eleven years old, barely measuring up to my waist. With hair and eyes as black as coal, a gentle gaze was all I could see. She smiled slightly, stepping back a bit.

"I'm Yui." she bowed her head slightly, "What's your name?"

"Garr."

She perked her head up.

"You wanna see Nishida?" Yui smiled, "He's talked about you."

"Hopefully for good things." I grimaced.

"Oh yes!" she nodded, "Come in! I'll have to wake him up."

Leaving the door open, the strange girl let me inside.

"You know her?" Graye probed.

"No we just met." I looked back equally as confused.

Closing the entrance, I glimpsed at the interior.

The hell!? Nishida had some really...odd looking stuff. It was all pretty fancy, something I'd imagine being in some Floor Clearing commander's quarters. After a few minutes of waiting, the bedroom door opened. Looking up, I was left in shock.

Nishida wasn't a spider anymore! The man seemed to be in his forties, his eyes glossy and tired.

"What is it, little one?" he sighed, "I'm not expecting any visitors."

His eyes met mine, a soft brown.

"Oh hi!" Nishida smiled, "I'm Nishida, who might you be?"

I stopped for a minute. He...wasn't recognizing me?

"I'm Garr." I greeted with a smile, "Do you...remember me?"

He kept a completely vacant expression, the balding older man simply smiling.

"Not sure what you mean, my friend." he laughed, "But maybe we have?"

The man who started me on this quest, the one who believed in me. What happened to him?

"Nishida?" I inquired.

"Please!" he pardoned, "Make yourself at home, got a mean dish I have for my wife and daughter when I'm home!"

Well at least he remembered that.

"Do you...remember the Malishard?" I tossed.

"What's that?"

I looked to Graye, my face cooling from the shock. This couldn't be happening, he completely forgot everything involving the mission. Yui emerged in the chaos, sitting on the opposite end of the table. She kept staring at me, as if I was one of those heroes you'd find in a story.

"You seem very troubled." she frowned, "Did something happen?"

"Sorry." I shook my head, "You're too young for that."

"You should!" Nishida advised merrily, "This little girl's got great advice!"

"Umm...she's a kid." Graye raised an eyebrow.

I started to feel kinda creeped out. This Yui kept looking at me, her eyes soft and playful on the outside. I couldn't put my finger on it, but something was deeply wrong here.

"By my calculations." She suddenly chirped, "You are driven primarily by emotion, rather than logical foresight."

I coughed, what kind of girl was this?

"Accounting for this branching form of thinking," she explained, "You will without a doubt drive away everyone you love away from self doubt."

"Wow wow wow!" I raised hands, "What the actual...how'd you know that?"

"Your body language." she answered, "The way you talk to people. You seek assurance from others almost automatically."

"Judging by that ring on your hand too." Yui continued, "You have or had a special someone."

How the hell did she know all of this? I steadily rose from the chair, watching her carefully. Graye joined alongside me, glancing back towards the door.

"Your chances of destroying your relationship are above eighty eight percent."

I froze, staring at the artwork behind this eleven year old savant. My God, this girl was...absolutely spot on.

"No..." I was gripped in doubt, "I won't let her down."

She said nothing, tilting her head again. She spent the next few minutes staring at me. Who was Yui!? She's barely known me for longer than five minutes and yet already knew my deepest fears!

My mind ran back to the days prior, Rika and I swimming through a coral reef together. Losing that would've meant the world to me, I could see spending the rest of my days with her.

"How important is she to you?" Yui suddenly popped.

"I'd...give up my fingers for her."

"That's an odd tribute...why?"

"For a warrior, our fingers are what let us fight. For me to give that, I'm surrendering myself."

"Interesting." Yui smiled. "If you talk to me, I can promise you it'll last as long as you and her want it."

"Don't." Graye warned, "Garr, something's not right here."

"I have to know." I argued to him, "It was always me that messed things up before."

Just as I approached the table again, a message flashed in my HUD.

[From Lisbeth: Honey? I've got a situation.]

A/N: Garr has stopped working and needs to reboot, would you like to send an error report? Please be sure to tell me, not Microsoft...they'd be wondering what the f you're talking about.

Hey guys, thanks for readin mah stuff! :D as usual reviews are greatly appreciated, as well as favorites and follows. Will send another chapter soon!