Scene Twenty -One
While Beth was asleep, Karen quickly got dressed in jeans and white sweater and made a cup of coffee while keeping a sharp eye on the post. The local St Mary's Hospital had interviewed her the week before Christmas for a permanent nursing post and said that they would let her know the result of her job. She had been up with the lark for the past few working days and, this time, the letter plopped through her letterbox that she had expected. Padding out in bare feet, she opened it carefully and her heart leaped inside her with joy. Their reply was good news and that she would definitely be starting at the end of the month. She jumped around shouting to herself, clutching the piece of paper and rushed into the bedroom.
"Beth, I've got the job I've been angling for. I've got a permanent job at last."
"Hey, that's fantastic news," came the surprisingly coherent reply, straight up from total sleep." Come here, babes."
Karen slid on the bed next to her lover, her hair slightly rumpled but a big smile on her face. Beth's slim arms extended themselves and wrapped themselves round the fair-haired woman. The fullness of their lips met and their tongues caressed each other. Karen sighed to herself blissfully, thinking just what a magic morning it was when really it was quite normal after all.
"Darling, you've got too many clothes on for my liking," Beth drawled at last, her eyes looking up expectantly at the woman whose eyes were alight with the joys of life." We'll talk about your job….after."
Karen looked down at her lover, looking so alluring in her delicate lacy white nightie which suggested the curves that she knew so well. She felt on top of the world with energy coursing through her nervous system. She pulled her sweater over her head and threw it to one side. The sudden sight of her lover's full figure, tousled hair and laughing blue eyes was irresistible to Beth and also the way that her lover didn't beat about the bush in unzipping her jeans and sliding back into bed.
"Come on, Beth. I thought you were in a hurry," cajoled Karen in those husky tones that Beth had such a weakness for. She was already sliding her hands greedily up Beth's slim body and expertly touching her nipples.
"You give me a bit of space for a minute, babes and then I am all yours," retorted Beth, lingering over the words. After she had cast her nightie aside, Karen stared down with desire at her lover's already hardening nipples and the look of desire all over her face. She laid her body alongside Beth's and greedily started kissing and licking her lover's smooth neck, whose legs were already wrapping themselves round Karen. The blond haired woman felt unbelievably horny this morning and her desires flowed outwards. She edged her way down Beth's body while her lover gently caressed her skin and hair and, after she had slowly and lovingly licked one nipple after another, kissed her way down that flat stomach to where her desires wanted her to be. She was in seventh heaven as her tongue expertly coaxed her lover to excitement to the accompaniment of Beth's moans of pleasure and the taste of her on her tongue. The feel of their skin against each other was a delight that was so impossibly extreme, of touching and being touched. At moments like these, Karen felt so incredibly grateful to Beth for liberating her to the delights of lesbian lovemaking. What was music to her was the sounds of another woman's sighs of pleasure and words of endearments and ecstatic sounds building up to a climax of adoration. Above all else, she knew that Beth's feelings were utterly genuine and it was that that unlocked Karen's fierce emotions, so long denied inside.
Thoughts rushed through Karen in no particular order as she and Beth finally got dressed, ready for the day. They curled up around each other in the large and capacious armchair while they discussed their plans. It felt far more comfortable than being all stiff and formal round a table. Office organization was the death of the intimate expression of feelings, so Karen thought so strongly, after her long experience over the years. The feel of Beth's slim fingers against her white sweater along the line of her bra felt far more intimate and normal rather than disembodied office politics, divorced of real feelings. She knew now that Helen's trial would take place before she was due to start work for her new job. It meant that she could carry on working as an agency nurse and she could definitely set aside time to stand by Helen and Nikki at the her own and Beth's personal joy, she never let it deflect her from her own worries as to their friends' predicament.
"So about this job, babes, this is a really permanent job? I can't believe it, not that you haven't slaved for it."
"I've got to pass through a three months probation period but the beauty of all the temping that I've done is that I've picked up on a whole range of work experience, including some work at St Mary's already. I've made my name there already," came Karen's rush of enthusiastic words, which gladdened the heart of the dark haired woman. She wanted so much for her lover to have wings to fly with.
"It sounds like you've got it made, babes. Pretty soon, you'll be running the ward if I know you."
"Hardly that, darling," denied Karen modestly though secretly thinking that her solid managerial experience at Larkhall might stand her in good stead yet." I've checked out just how the NHS has changed since I last worked in it full-time. If I stick at it, I should be all right."
"I'm really happy for you, babes. I know how good things are between ourselves personally but I also want to see you where you belong."
"This does mean, of course, that I can properly pay my way and, when I get my first paycheck, I mean to treat you to a romantic meal out, for …..everything you've done for me," Karen finished in melting tones. All her feelings of love and gratitude came pouring out in that instant.
There came the time when both of them had to make a move. She knew that Beth would be preoccupied with a journalism assignment that morning.
"Darling, I'll pop over in the car to see Nikki and Helen," called out Karen to Beth. That was fine for both of them as both knew that they'd be back for each other.
"Give my love to them both," called Beth as their lips locked one more time.
********
Karen was out into the morning's air, driving round London in her little MG. She could never get bored of driving as, thank God, she was in a position to be driving her car rather than think of it rusting away in that police pound. It felt nippy and maneuverable as she steered it along that well remembered route to Nikki and Helen's flat. Confidently, she strode up the steps and a wave of good feeling took her into the hall, where she was affectionately received, duly kissed on her cheek and hugged by each grateful woman.
"I've sorted out my plans for the future. I've got a permanent job at St Mary's hospital. You will see Karen Betts in her blue nurse's uniform and stopwatch and a regular wage at the back of me."
"That's fantastic news, Karen. I'm so glad for you. I bet you a fiver you'll be ward sister in six months if not sooner or whatever they call them these days," Helen said with unaffected pleasure, putting her own troubles to one side.
"Do you know, Helen, you're the second person to say that today?" Karen said with certain levity while blinking tears out of her eyes at the smaller woman's generosity of spirit. It was curious but in these recent months, she found it easier to cry and it didn't cross her mind to feel foolish about that.
"Beth being the other of course," added Nikki dryly." Better face it, it's a toss up whether your best friend or your lover knows you best. It all depends on the quality of the relationships."
"I'll make coffees for us all," added Helen, with that air of wanting to jump up and do something practical.
Everything seemed amicable and friendly on this winter Saturday and Helen hospitably fetched three mugs of steaming hot coffee into the lounge and the conversation ambled along and started to touch on the oncoming trial. This gave Karen the opportunity to show that her good fortune would benefit her friends also. Karen's positivism of spirits felt irresistible to herself.
"I was wondering if you'll need my company when it gets nearer to the trial. I've figured out that I can carry on with temping for the agency till my regular job starts and fit my hours round the court hearing and before then as well if need be."
"Sure," Nikki answered in deliberate tones, not quite her spontaneous self." You know that you are welcome, any time you call. The only problem is that, with the best will in the world, we're going to get tense. We may well need your calming influence."
"That's really kind of you, Karen but are you sure you can take all this on? You know how wearing trials can get," warned Helen very compassionately.
The penny had finally dropped for Karen. Helen and Nikki were obviously thinking back to when Karen was downing way too much whisky than was good for her and on the edge of a nervous breakdown. They had got things wrong and this time, Karen could see that she could contribute that strength and clarity of vision. She was definitely needed around here.
"We'll really be grateful for your help, Karen. We just wanted to be straight with you," Nikki bit off her tongue from talking about Fenner having done them a favour as the guy was doing time and she knew how sensitive Helen really was about her forthcoming trial despite her best efforts.
"I know what you're really getting at, you two. This time around, I can be strong for you both. I know how I can carry the weight this time. I'm even better than I used to be now I've got Beth," Karen explained." You have to see that I can't possibly not help you. You've both stuck by me through thick and thin when I stood to get a ten-year stretch for a crime I didn't commit. But for you, Nikki and of course George, I would have got sent down and gone completely over the edge."
"We debated it amongst ourselves and we felt duty bound to help you," added Helen stiffly with obvious effort. Karen began to sense that just now and then, the smaller woman couldn't suppress the strain that leaked out of her and that her tension was also rubbing off onto Nikki.
"You even inadvertently found me the love of my life," pursued Karen with fierce urgency and conviction, not deterred from her mission." I've talked this over with Beth and she's all for the idea.I'm sure that Nikki will give you all the tender support before the day in court but if there's any role for me, just tell me. I know what it's like, believe me."
A few tears escaped Helen's large green eyes before she flicked them out of her eyes. It was down to them to lay their cards on the table.
"I'm really sorry, Karen. You might have got the idea that we were emotionally freezing you out. The truth is that we're really waking up to realize that this trial is for real, no matter how irrational and stupid it sounds. Up till now, we've been into emotional denial. We went to a meeting with George and Jo the other day with the intention of treating it as an academic exercise. What freaked us out that even Jo and George thought that the establishment is either being incredibly stupid or that they knew something we didn't. In all the court cases we've fought or backed, we've got cocky in thinking that nothing bad could possibly happen to us. You came round on a bad day for us but we don't want to think you weren't welcome. We would really love you to help us out."
Karen reached forward and put her arms round Helen who silently cried into the other woman's fair hair. She clung onto the fair-haired woman as a drowning woman onto a rock. A minute later, she felt a fresh pair of soft arms round her and knew it was Nikki. She made shushing sounds into their ears and stayed with them until they finally got through to the other side of their emotions and everything was all cried out.
"Thanks a million, Karen." Nikki said shakily, her emotions written all over her face. "The trouble is that neither of us wanted to admit to the other that we were feeling the pressure."
"I understand you entirely. It's a strange British quality to be bad at accepting help and, for that matter compliments," Karen said in a calm reassuring tone of voice." You've both got it even worse than I have if that's possible. Till recently, I didn't let anyone in on my own traumas, believe you me."
"That's true," Nikki laughed shakily, flicking tears out of her own eyes. "I don't know what we can do about it, that's our problem."
"Just accept help when it's kindly offered," came Karen's simple soothing reply.
*****
The harsh winter wind howled round the flat where Karen and Beth lived. Beth had gone out to work early leaving Karen a start at an old people's home where the agency had sent her for three days this week, the first day being a half-day. She remembered the very emotional conversation she'd had with her two dearest friends the previous day. She felt that she was returning some of the enormous help that she'd received from them during her own troubles.