.Disclaimer: Yet again I don't own anything here apart from Raisa Ramsey

Chapter 20

James was missing Lily.

To most people this might seem a somewhat odd assertion given that to all intents and purposes he recently dumped the girl, but it was true all the same. It was almost like getting rid of your nose, in that you take it for granted as something that will always be there and then it isn't and you realise that you can't smell things anymore.

He opened his mouth, lips quivering and made to address the room at large once more: "-"

"For God's sake James, if you ask me more time whether you did the right thing then I swear I'll smack you one," Sirius snapped, sitting on his bed Indian-style.

"Shut up," muttered James mutinously. He knew that Sirius was also going through some weird girl related issues, but if he was so adamant that he did not want to discuss them then the least he could do was have the decency to give James the floor and moan to his heart's content.

"If you don't mind me asking though..." Sirius began, attempting to pose delicately the question that had been on his lips for the last three and a half hours. "Why did you dump her?"

"I was being adult about the situation," James protested. Although, having spent every waking moment turning the situation over and over in his mind, he was beginning to think that maybe 'adult' had not been the best way to go.

Due to really not wanting to talk about his feelings James instead decided to throw a pillow at Sirius, only to miss and fatally injured a favourite lampshade of Remus'.

"Bugger off, Padfoot." James glowered. "And you're going to replace that lampshade."

"I'd almost forgotten how mean you were when you were miserable," remarked Sirius dryly.

James inclined his head tartly and surveyed Sirius: "So Padfoot, how are things going with Raisa?"

At this unwanted intrusion into his personal life, Sirius abruptly jumped up from his bed and left the room.

Yup – nothing shut a man up like turning the tables on him.

He frowned. Although Sirius was now off his back, James was now alone. He didn't like being alone ...funnily enough thin air was not nearly as receptive to his words as regular people.

Luckily for James, at that moment the door swung open to reveal the tiny form of one Raisa Ramsey...

"TAKE COVER - MAYBE SHE'S ARMED!" yelled James with bloodcurdling intensity, immediately swan-diving under his bed. James then realised that bar the object of his irrational fear, no one else was in the room. What he basically looked like was a big pansy of a guy scared stiff of a tiny and sheepish looking girl.

"Jamsie, can we talk?" Raisa inquired hesitantly, wondering briefly why the hell he had jumped under his bed as soon as she had entered the room. Was she really that intimidating? Well, Sirius bloody Black seemed to think so given that he had sprinted down the dorm stairs just now and completely blanked her. Raisa glared.

A forlorn head popped out from under the bed: "I'm not scared of you."



Trying to fight back images of her seven year old brother hiding under his bed afraid of monsters in the dark, Raisa made her way over to James' bed and sat down warily. (The 'warily' here inserted because in all honesty you never quite knew what you might find sitting on the bed of a Boy.)

"Come on James," Raisa began. "Do you want to come and sit with me?" she questioned softly, patting the empty space on the bed next to her.

Forlornly the disembodied head nodded. Not that he wanted to sit with the girl who stupefied him and then bodily assaulted him, of course. James was simply beginning to realise that under no circumstances is it ever a good idea to dive under your own bed...

Raisa smiled affectionately, happy that she now had her role back: "Tell me everything..."

James lit up like a very large Christmas tree. He loved an audience...

He had to tell her...

She would either not believe him or completely freak out, but he had to tell her all the same.

It was not fair that it had to be like this, but then again life wasn't fair.

He had to tell her...

"Really? So you'll actually come down with me and talk to her?" Raisa frowned; a little shocked that she can actually managed to achieve what she set out to.

James nodded, still a little dazed from Raisa's words.

"She loves me," he spluttered, bemused in the extreme but happy. For the first time in a long time he was happy.

James trudged off down the stairs and Raisa made to follow him. However, she quickly found herself dragged into a dark and murky corner by some unknown force.

She gasped on coming face to face with Sirius Black, who looked tormented...if that was even possible.

"What the hell do YOU want?"

He cut her off with a searing kiss.

"There's a prophecy..." he murmured the words slow and soft, not desperate to broadcast them to the Gryffindor Tower at large.

Raisa would have scoffed at this statement were it not for the look of utter seriousness (forgive the pun) in his eyes.

He continued - the cadence of his voice almost hypnotic... "I fall in love with a girl, I lose her."

She stared at him, by now half convinced that maybe he was telling the truth.

..."I can't be with you because I have to protect you."

Finally done presenting her with surprising and shocking information Sirius stepped back, as if to say 'there you have it'. Raisa knew he was expecting her to respond but in truth she had no idea what to say to him, much less any idea what he actually wanted to hear.

"You love me?" she eventually managed to trip out, the words feeling heavy on her tongue.

"I...I...Look Rai, I think you've misunderstood the point here," Sirius stuttered.

"Well what is the point?" Raisa snapped, now aware of the fact that she had left Lily and James alone in the Common Room together. If she was going to be responsible for finally getting them together then the least to expect was to be around to see the resolution.

Talking round in circles with Sirius Black was really not very high on her list of things that she wanted to be doing right now.

"The point is that I can't love you," Sirius affirmed, reaching out a hand to caress Raisa's cheek, attempting to let her down gently.

He didn't expect the sharp slap to his wrist and the even harder knee connecting with his man parts.

"Good luck with that then sweetie," Raisa called overly jauntily as she sped down the stairs, desperate to put as much distance as possible between herself and the only guy to ever say he loved her...

Sorry for the wait between chapters, I've been a bit out of the loop with my writing recently. It's not really an excuse though, so I'm just really sorry I'm so disorganised with my writing at the mo...Please forgive me!

(...and Please review! )

;)