Amethyst Notes (vanity publishing)
The ending to this story was difficult for me, as I wasn't sure what to do.
I did originally think of a version where Amethyst killed Frodo, and the nymph race did go to Sidaradiijes. But then I realised it wasn't a good ending. Then I thought that Amethyst would kill herself out of guilt, and her blood hitting the ground would reverse the process, saving the world. I didn't use it, as it was far too depressing.
I did write a version in which Frodo went back to the havens, but it didn't seen quiet right. I couldn't put my finger on it for a while, and realised why the end of Lord of the Rings felt odd: It wasn't right. Frodo deserved happiness in the Shire.
I don't know what's going to happen to him, but I would like to try to write a sequel, with anyone's helps of course. I can't seem to get it to go right in my mind. If anyone would like to help, me please email me at wolfmaiden23@hotmail.com. But now to how I decided to get the ending......
I couldn't figure out how to finish it, when I decided to watch Spaced. It is a programme about two people who live together pretending to be a professional couple to keep a flat. I watched the end of the second series, and am ashamed to say I stole most of the ending from spaced, because I liked it, and as this is fanfiction, I'm allowed to do stuff like that. I shouldn't have really, but it just happened. It isn't the ending they use, but a deleted scene, which I thought was brilliant. (Okay, it's a bad thing to do, but the guy who did the movie signs practically lifted the ending from Alfred hitcock's the birds, so, I don't think I'm the worse)
If you are wondering about the whole Rhiannon Rose thing, I shan't explain, because if I get around to doing the sequel it shall explain, but for the time being, let's just say Gandalf discovered it. Let's also say that Aster met Gandalf long before Rex, and definitely before he threw her out.
There are many other references to movies, books and TV programmes in here, and thank god I didn't put a Matrix reference in! I don't think I did, well, not at least the usual one (the one where the character hangs in the air, just before a kick)
One reference I think is a little usual is the one from eXisteZ, because it's a little known movie. That is when as blows out the base of Myotisis's spine. This is the end of the movie, when the woman realises that her bodyguard is her real assassin. What he yells is what is shouted in the movie.
The thing with the scrabble letters came out of my mind for no good reason. As you probably know, That is a reference to the Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy, when they are trying to work out the question of life, the universe and everything.
The bit where Rhiannon and Gimli are sobbing is a reference to the first episode of spaced. In later chapters, I tried to get things to run on, like in Spaced. (If you haven't seen it, you don't know what you're missing, it's a program on Channel 4 in England, and you can order it off channel 4 at the shop. It's about two people who pretend to be a professional couple to get a flat. It is really, really good, and can even make my friends laugh, which is an achievement as they don't like what I like.)
The name Rex and Ebony use in this story (Hiligard) is the name of a Took who died young. Check it out, I promise it should be there in appendix C.
The bit with the spring was just for my personal like. I liked the idea of baptism, i.e. being baptised into god's family. In this story she is removed from her old, hobbit identity, and then given her new nymph identity, but I do not believe baptism can tell you who you are, but show you what you want to be. Don't get into a big religious debate with me, I just write fanfiction.
The whole dream sequence things was a little Hysteria (screenplay) mixed with Memento, Matrix and eXistenZ. I always find dream sequences an interesting (although admittedly a lazy) way of showing character personality and maybe premonitions. In one of them, the one when she's ill, there is a reference to Alice in Wonderland.
The childhood game, in which Amethyst makes up stories to play is sort of a reference to the TV series of Mona the Vampire.
The last words Amethyst say's to Frodo, 'For I am just a cloud' is from a poem by U.A Fanthorpe. It was called 'old man, Old Man' and was about a father who ignored his children. I'm not saying Frodo ignored the child, I just liked the last few lines. They made me cry when I read it, as the poem is very touching. I kinda had to edit them, but please forgive. Please read it, as it'd a very good poem, even if you have to study it for GCSE (which is NOT the reason why I put it in!)
The Idea for Ebony came from a mixture of Drussila in Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Alice in Alec McGees game and a mistress in Randell and Hopkirk (deceased) [episode 4, paranoia]. Basically, I got the idea that Rex should have a mad woman to love, as he is a mixture of Spike, Ram from the tribe, (I think it was series 4, but if I'm wrong I'm sorry. He was at least the leader of the tecno's.), and Lethe from Demonology 101 (at http://faith.rydia.net It's really good, trust me. Again, I admit I plagiarised a few lines from that.).
There is yet another reference to Spaced in the scene with Merry and Frodo. In the way Merry tries to get Frodo to stay, is more or less like in the programme, and what Frodo says about asking Merry if he wants him to stay is them same. I just liked the sentimental touch there.
Rhiannon the Blue and Xandra the blue are different. Rhiannon for instance, is fictional, while Xandra is the name of a fanfic writer. One of my friends gets a cameo in this (scarlet Webb), as she always bugs me to put ones in, and I was going to have all of my mates in there, but I changed my mind.
I know I was really nasty to Legolas in this fic, but I have no clue why. I suppose because he's beautiful (grins evilly) and I don't personally fancy him. He just seems to me to be in the right place whenever I need a serious injury.
But, on a different note, there is going to be a second story of Amethyst. It's sort of a love story, but there will be action from all of our favourite hobbits, wizards, dwarf and elf.( If I can get around to working out the damn PLOT! All help is appreciated on this, especially if anyone wants to co-write this with me). But understand that I may do a Tolkien, and hand the torch over to our newest characters, (i.e Amethyst's children)
Thank you for reading and reviewing and so on. I hope you've enjoyed reading this stuff, as much as I've enjoyed writing it. It's almost a pity to end it, but I have to let it go. But, on the upside, I get to give Amethyst, Aster and Rhiannon a change of scene. I might even meet her one- day, if she doesn't mind.
The outtakes (in no particular order)
When Rex is stabbing Asters body..
*stab*
*Looks at crowd *
Rex: One from the vaults! (everyone cracks up laughing as Aster gets up, covered in fake blood)
Xandra the Director: CUT!!!!!!
When discussing what Amethyst is.?
Merry: Yeah right.
Frodo: I have a point. You seem to think that just because I can't remember the F****** lines.(Bursts out laughing. All of them start to laugh)
Xandra the Director: (laughing) Oh god.CUT!
When Frodo greets Pippin.
(Pippin runs up to him and Jumps on him, knocking Frodo to the ground. They both start laughing, and then Pippin pretends to shag him.)
Pippin: Oh, I'm such a sexy beast!!!
(Everyone on set starts laughing.)
Xandra the Director: (laughing) .CUT
After Ash appears to her when she runs away.
Amethyst: ASH!
(Ash walks in the shot.) Ash: Yes? You wanted me?'
(Amethyst bursts out laughing.)
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
When Amethyst gets back to the hole.
Merry: (waving his finger) do you know how much trouble you're in.(Starts laughing)
(Amethyst starts laughing.)
Xandra the Director: CUT! Okay, scene 67, take 1347845789587957894.
Ash and Arwen
Ash: I know of little halflings.oh F***, I got my lines mixed up again!
(Arwen starts to laugh)
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Elanor and Amethyst
Amethyst: you don't like me, do you Elle?
Elanor: what are you trying to say?
Amethyst: (just for a few seconds she's quiet. Then she start to laugh)
Elanor: Okay, maybe that was rhetorical! (Bursts out laughing herself)
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Pippin, Sam and Frodo in the study.
Pippin: FRODO! (The door sticks) (Muffled) S****!
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Take 2
Pippin: FRODO! (tries to open the door) (Muffled) COCK!
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Take 3
Pippin: FRODO! ( The door doesn't open. Pippin kicks it a few times, and finally it falls on the floor.)
Pippin: THE DOOR IS OPEN!
(Frodo and Sam start to laugh, as well as Pippin)
Pippin: I don't see what's wrong with that?
Xandra the Director: CUT!
Take 4
Pippin: (opens the door with ease, and falls flat on his face, as he isn't used to it.)
Sam: (Starts to laugh. The set is in hysterics.)
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Pippin: Right, but what does that mean?
Frodo: (starts laughing)
Xandra the Director: CUT!
Rex: And I've got my Ebony a little present..
Ebony: And I've got you a present...(flashes him)
(Rex starts to laugh.)
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Frodo: 'I need you to live! You're the only thing that keeps me going on like this! I would have left long ago if you hadn't come into my life, like a little ray of light. Gemstone, if you die, you'll take a part of me with you. Please, I love you, I need you!'
Amethyst: BOO!!
Frodo: AHH! (starts to laugh)
Xandra the Director: CUT!
(Amethyst walks into the dark kitchen)
Sam: Do you like scary movies?
(Amethyst starts to laugh)
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Ash: Are we there yet? (Everyone on set is laughing)
Legolas: No
Ash: Are we there yet?
Legolas: No
Ash: Are we there yet?
Legolas: No
Ash: Are we there yet?
Legolas: (Goes on for a couple of steps) Yes. Now we are.
(Rex stops the cart. We are filming from Amethyst being in the back)
Rex: Right that's far enough!
Amethyst: (jolted across the cart) S***! (Starts laughing)
Xandra the Director: CUT!
Ash and co arrive at Bag end.
Ash: (Tries to jump over fence and ends up only going half way. He slowly slips over the fence, laughing.)
Legolas: (laughing as he comes into the shot looking blurry.) Are you all right?
Ash: (laughing) NO!
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Frodo, ash, Myotisis and Legolas are discussing Amethyst and where she's been taken.
Frodo: Do you know how to get there?
Ash: Yes, sort of.. But you've got to remind me of my lines, as I've forgotten them.(Hits table as everyone bursts out laughing) We shall be the fellowship of the kitchen table!
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
The bit when Rex does a Galadriel.
Rex: Go on, have a look. It's all in the Shire, the place you want to be.
Amethyst: I see, I see that Shaggy will get another number one! (Bursts out laughing with Rex)
Xandra the Director: CUT!
Aster attacks Gandalf.
Aster: Hyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! (Throws a knife at him, missing him completely)
Gandalf: that was disturbing..
Xandra the Director: CUT!
Take two
Aster: ( Aster jumps out of tree, and misses him completely) S***!
Gandalf: (starts to laugh)
Aster: F*** you!
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Take three
(Aster and Gandalf are dancing)
Gandalf: IT'S GETTING HOT IN HERE, SO HOT! SO TAKE OFF ALL OF YOUR CLOTHES.
Aster: I'm getting so hot; I Just Want To Take My Clothes Off.
Gandalf :IT'S GETTING HOT IN HERE, SO HOT! SO TAKE OFF ALL OF YOUR CLOTHES. I'M GETTING SO HOT.
Aster: I Just Want To Take My Clothes Off.
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Afterwards..
Scarlet: Aster, you might want to get off Gandalf.
Aster: (bursts out laughing.)
Gandalf: (Sitting up) OH my god.. (Laughs. The whole set is in hysteric)
Xandra the Director: CUT!
When Ash blows Myotisis's spine out.
Myotisis: AH! (dies)
Legolas and Ash: I only wanted to blow the bloody arms off!
(Everyone starts to laugh)
Xandra the Director: CUT!
Gimli and Rhiannon in the dudgeon
Gimli and Rhiannon: Ten green bottles, sitting on the wall, ten green bottles sitting on the wall!
Xandra the Director: CUT!
In the dungeons
Legolas: Where's Aster? And Scarlet?
Frodo, Sam, Ash and Gandalf: over there.
(looks over to see Aster and Scarlet in the dungeon dancing to very loud clubbing music.)
(Everyone starts to laugh.)
Xandra the Director: CUT!
Scarlet: Kathaerdous? What the heck is the Kath erd dus? Kath a doths? Kath ath ath ping pong dong lous! (Starts to gag and laugh.)
Xandra the Director: CUT!
Denver: My lord, how may I serve you?
Rex: The blood for the ceremony has escaped from the dungeons Denver, You couldn't possibly go and stop it running away, could you? But make sure no blood is split, it would be a pity to have to put the Nerhurrevd back.
Denver: Do you want fries with that?
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
The ending to this story was difficult for me, as I wasn't sure what to do.
I did originally think of a version where Amethyst killed Frodo, and the nymph race did go to Sidaradiijes. But then I realised it wasn't a good ending. Then I thought that Amethyst would kill herself out of guilt, and her blood hitting the ground would reverse the process, saving the world. I didn't use it, as it was far too depressing.
I did write a version in which Frodo went back to the havens, but it didn't seen quiet right. I couldn't put my finger on it for a while, and realised why the end of Lord of the Rings felt odd: It wasn't right. Frodo deserved happiness in the Shire.
I don't know what's going to happen to him, but I would like to try to write a sequel, with anyone's helps of course. I can't seem to get it to go right in my mind. If anyone would like to help, me please email me at wolfmaiden23@hotmail.com. But now to how I decided to get the ending......
I couldn't figure out how to finish it, when I decided to watch Spaced. It is a programme about two people who live together pretending to be a professional couple to keep a flat. I watched the end of the second series, and am ashamed to say I stole most of the ending from spaced, because I liked it, and as this is fanfiction, I'm allowed to do stuff like that. I shouldn't have really, but it just happened. It isn't the ending they use, but a deleted scene, which I thought was brilliant. (Okay, it's a bad thing to do, but the guy who did the movie signs practically lifted the ending from Alfred hitcock's the birds, so, I don't think I'm the worse)
If you are wondering about the whole Rhiannon Rose thing, I shan't explain, because if I get around to doing the sequel it shall explain, but for the time being, let's just say Gandalf discovered it. Let's also say that Aster met Gandalf long before Rex, and definitely before he threw her out.
There are many other references to movies, books and TV programmes in here, and thank god I didn't put a Matrix reference in! I don't think I did, well, not at least the usual one (the one where the character hangs in the air, just before a kick)
One reference I think is a little usual is the one from eXisteZ, because it's a little known movie. That is when as blows out the base of Myotisis's spine. This is the end of the movie, when the woman realises that her bodyguard is her real assassin. What he yells is what is shouted in the movie.
The thing with the scrabble letters came out of my mind for no good reason. As you probably know, That is a reference to the Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy, when they are trying to work out the question of life, the universe and everything.
The bit where Rhiannon and Gimli are sobbing is a reference to the first episode of spaced. In later chapters, I tried to get things to run on, like in Spaced. (If you haven't seen it, you don't know what you're missing, it's a program on Channel 4 in England, and you can order it off channel 4 at the shop. It's about two people who pretend to be a professional couple to get a flat. It is really, really good, and can even make my friends laugh, which is an achievement as they don't like what I like.)
The name Rex and Ebony use in this story (Hiligard) is the name of a Took who died young. Check it out, I promise it should be there in appendix C.
The bit with the spring was just for my personal like. I liked the idea of baptism, i.e. being baptised into god's family. In this story she is removed from her old, hobbit identity, and then given her new nymph identity, but I do not believe baptism can tell you who you are, but show you what you want to be. Don't get into a big religious debate with me, I just write fanfiction.
The whole dream sequence things was a little Hysteria (screenplay) mixed with Memento, Matrix and eXistenZ. I always find dream sequences an interesting (although admittedly a lazy) way of showing character personality and maybe premonitions. In one of them, the one when she's ill, there is a reference to Alice in Wonderland.
The childhood game, in which Amethyst makes up stories to play is sort of a reference to the TV series of Mona the Vampire.
The last words Amethyst say's to Frodo, 'For I am just a cloud' is from a poem by U.A Fanthorpe. It was called 'old man, Old Man' and was about a father who ignored his children. I'm not saying Frodo ignored the child, I just liked the last few lines. They made me cry when I read it, as the poem is very touching. I kinda had to edit them, but please forgive. Please read it, as it'd a very good poem, even if you have to study it for GCSE (which is NOT the reason why I put it in!)
The Idea for Ebony came from a mixture of Drussila in Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Alice in Alec McGees game and a mistress in Randell and Hopkirk (deceased) [episode 4, paranoia]. Basically, I got the idea that Rex should have a mad woman to love, as he is a mixture of Spike, Ram from the tribe, (I think it was series 4, but if I'm wrong I'm sorry. He was at least the leader of the tecno's.), and Lethe from Demonology 101 (at http://faith.rydia.net It's really good, trust me. Again, I admit I plagiarised a few lines from that.).
There is yet another reference to Spaced in the scene with Merry and Frodo. In the way Merry tries to get Frodo to stay, is more or less like in the programme, and what Frodo says about asking Merry if he wants him to stay is them same. I just liked the sentimental touch there.
Rhiannon the Blue and Xandra the blue are different. Rhiannon for instance, is fictional, while Xandra is the name of a fanfic writer. One of my friends gets a cameo in this (scarlet Webb), as she always bugs me to put ones in, and I was going to have all of my mates in there, but I changed my mind.
I know I was really nasty to Legolas in this fic, but I have no clue why. I suppose because he's beautiful (grins evilly) and I don't personally fancy him. He just seems to me to be in the right place whenever I need a serious injury.
But, on a different note, there is going to be a second story of Amethyst. It's sort of a love story, but there will be action from all of our favourite hobbits, wizards, dwarf and elf.( If I can get around to working out the damn PLOT! All help is appreciated on this, especially if anyone wants to co-write this with me). But understand that I may do a Tolkien, and hand the torch over to our newest characters, (i.e Amethyst's children)
Thank you for reading and reviewing and so on. I hope you've enjoyed reading this stuff, as much as I've enjoyed writing it. It's almost a pity to end it, but I have to let it go. But, on the upside, I get to give Amethyst, Aster and Rhiannon a change of scene. I might even meet her one- day, if she doesn't mind.
The outtakes (in no particular order)
When Rex is stabbing Asters body..
*stab*
*Looks at crowd *
Rex: One from the vaults! (everyone cracks up laughing as Aster gets up, covered in fake blood)
Xandra the Director: CUT!!!!!!
When discussing what Amethyst is.?
Merry: Yeah right.
Frodo: I have a point. You seem to think that just because I can't remember the F****** lines.(Bursts out laughing. All of them start to laugh)
Xandra the Director: (laughing) Oh god.CUT!
When Frodo greets Pippin.
(Pippin runs up to him and Jumps on him, knocking Frodo to the ground. They both start laughing, and then Pippin pretends to shag him.)
Pippin: Oh, I'm such a sexy beast!!!
(Everyone on set starts laughing.)
Xandra the Director: (laughing) .CUT
After Ash appears to her when she runs away.
Amethyst: ASH!
(Ash walks in the shot.) Ash: Yes? You wanted me?'
(Amethyst bursts out laughing.)
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
When Amethyst gets back to the hole.
Merry: (waving his finger) do you know how much trouble you're in.(Starts laughing)
(Amethyst starts laughing.)
Xandra the Director: CUT! Okay, scene 67, take 1347845789587957894.
Ash and Arwen
Ash: I know of little halflings.oh F***, I got my lines mixed up again!
(Arwen starts to laugh)
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Elanor and Amethyst
Amethyst: you don't like me, do you Elle?
Elanor: what are you trying to say?
Amethyst: (just for a few seconds she's quiet. Then she start to laugh)
Elanor: Okay, maybe that was rhetorical! (Bursts out laughing herself)
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Pippin, Sam and Frodo in the study.
Pippin: FRODO! (The door sticks) (Muffled) S****!
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Take 2
Pippin: FRODO! (tries to open the door) (Muffled) COCK!
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Take 3
Pippin: FRODO! ( The door doesn't open. Pippin kicks it a few times, and finally it falls on the floor.)
Pippin: THE DOOR IS OPEN!
(Frodo and Sam start to laugh, as well as Pippin)
Pippin: I don't see what's wrong with that?
Xandra the Director: CUT!
Take 4
Pippin: (opens the door with ease, and falls flat on his face, as he isn't used to it.)
Sam: (Starts to laugh. The set is in hysterics.)
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Pippin: Right, but what does that mean?
Frodo: (starts laughing)
Xandra the Director: CUT!
Rex: And I've got my Ebony a little present..
Ebony: And I've got you a present...(flashes him)
(Rex starts to laugh.)
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Frodo: 'I need you to live! You're the only thing that keeps me going on like this! I would have left long ago if you hadn't come into my life, like a little ray of light. Gemstone, if you die, you'll take a part of me with you. Please, I love you, I need you!'
Amethyst: BOO!!
Frodo: AHH! (starts to laugh)
Xandra the Director: CUT!
(Amethyst walks into the dark kitchen)
Sam: Do you like scary movies?
(Amethyst starts to laugh)
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Ash: Are we there yet? (Everyone on set is laughing)
Legolas: No
Ash: Are we there yet?
Legolas: No
Ash: Are we there yet?
Legolas: No
Ash: Are we there yet?
Legolas: (Goes on for a couple of steps) Yes. Now we are.
(Rex stops the cart. We are filming from Amethyst being in the back)
Rex: Right that's far enough!
Amethyst: (jolted across the cart) S***! (Starts laughing)
Xandra the Director: CUT!
Ash and co arrive at Bag end.
Ash: (Tries to jump over fence and ends up only going half way. He slowly slips over the fence, laughing.)
Legolas: (laughing as he comes into the shot looking blurry.) Are you all right?
Ash: (laughing) NO!
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Frodo, ash, Myotisis and Legolas are discussing Amethyst and where she's been taken.
Frodo: Do you know how to get there?
Ash: Yes, sort of.. But you've got to remind me of my lines, as I've forgotten them.(Hits table as everyone bursts out laughing) We shall be the fellowship of the kitchen table!
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
The bit when Rex does a Galadriel.
Rex: Go on, have a look. It's all in the Shire, the place you want to be.
Amethyst: I see, I see that Shaggy will get another number one! (Bursts out laughing with Rex)
Xandra the Director: CUT!
Aster attacks Gandalf.
Aster: Hyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! (Throws a knife at him, missing him completely)
Gandalf: that was disturbing..
Xandra the Director: CUT!
Take two
Aster: ( Aster jumps out of tree, and misses him completely) S***!
Gandalf: (starts to laugh)
Aster: F*** you!
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Take three
(Aster and Gandalf are dancing)
Gandalf: IT'S GETTING HOT IN HERE, SO HOT! SO TAKE OFF ALL OF YOUR CLOTHES.
Aster: I'm getting so hot; I Just Want To Take My Clothes Off.
Gandalf :IT'S GETTING HOT IN HERE, SO HOT! SO TAKE OFF ALL OF YOUR CLOTHES. I'M GETTING SO HOT.
Aster: I Just Want To Take My Clothes Off.
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!
Afterwards..
Scarlet: Aster, you might want to get off Gandalf.
Aster: (bursts out laughing.)
Gandalf: (Sitting up) OH my god.. (Laughs. The whole set is in hysteric)
Xandra the Director: CUT!
When Ash blows Myotisis's spine out.
Myotisis: AH! (dies)
Legolas and Ash: I only wanted to blow the bloody arms off!
(Everyone starts to laugh)
Xandra the Director: CUT!
Gimli and Rhiannon in the dudgeon
Gimli and Rhiannon: Ten green bottles, sitting on the wall, ten green bottles sitting on the wall!
Xandra the Director: CUT!
In the dungeons
Legolas: Where's Aster? And Scarlet?
Frodo, Sam, Ash and Gandalf: over there.
(looks over to see Aster and Scarlet in the dungeon dancing to very loud clubbing music.)
(Everyone starts to laugh.)
Xandra the Director: CUT!
Scarlet: Kathaerdous? What the heck is the Kath erd dus? Kath a doths? Kath ath ath ping pong dong lous! (Starts to gag and laugh.)
Xandra the Director: CUT!
Denver: My lord, how may I serve you?
Rex: The blood for the ceremony has escaped from the dungeons Denver, You couldn't possibly go and stop it running away, could you? But make sure no blood is split, it would be a pity to have to put the Nerhurrevd back.
Denver: Do you want fries with that?
Xandra the Director: (laughing) CUT!