I was going to put this chapter a week ago, but not everything went as planned. So... I will post the next chapter, tomorrow to make up for the time delay! My profile did say I was working on the next chapter, and since we were stranded on the side of the war for 3 hours I got the next chapter done! Sorry, about the delay. I love you all. Thank you for supporting me, and I hope you guys comment and criticize.
Kira's PoV
It seemed like I was choking on my own breath. Gasping for air brought only nothing but pain to my chest and salt water tears to my cheeks.
"Kira, please wake up!" Strong sturdy hands gripped my shoulders where they were frantically shaking me.
Blinking desperately to try and clear the fuzziness in my vision, I could barely make out a face. "Castiel?" I croaked.
"Thank God," he murmured scooping me into his lap. My face pressed to the side of his neck as he cradled and rocked me trying to soothe me even though I could barely let out a sound. "I didn't know what to do. You just started screaming all of a sudden. I… I thought there was an intruder, or," Castiel himself trembled violently at the thought as he continued, "something or someone was hurting you."
I let myself soak in his warmth for a few minutes. "Don't worry. I just have nightmares sometimes," I said casually as if playing it off as no big deal made it any less of a deal.
"Don't worry?" He was incredulous. "When I came in here you were thrashing around and screaming as if someone was beating you to death, Kira." Just voicing his thoughts out loud made Castiel squeeze me tighter.
I winced from his crushing embrace and his frightening words. "I have had them since I moved here. My aunt made my room sound proof for this reason. I didn't mean to wake you up," I struggled to see my surroundings. After a few moments I was capable of seeing his face drawn in pain. Castiel's eyes were closed and he was biting his bottom lip. Laying my hands on Castiel shoulders I peered up at him. "Castiel, thank you, but I'm alright now."
His eyelids flickered open. "Are you now?" he inquired hoarsely
I swallowed down my next words. Please don't look at me like that, I wanted to beg. His minty breath tickled my nose. Steel eyes fettered me to my spot. Forget about what I said when I thought that I could have him removed from my life and I would be alright with that. My heart squirmed uncomfortably at the thought of Castiel leaving me behind. All I could do was gulp and nod.
"I'm glad you are alright," he responded breaking the spell as he turned his head away.
I gave a shaky smile. "Yeah, me too."
Castiel left in a hurry as if he couldn't wait to get out of this house. I was left alone, sitting on the cover of my bed wondering what happened.
Maybe Castiel just would never be able to see me any other way besides a friend. While I believe that I love him, I hadn't done anything to destroy the land of the friendzoned. Sure, we have hugged a couple of times, but that doesn't mean anything if I'm the only who get goosebumps and whose heart begins to pound like there is no tomorrow. With renewed determination I pulled the sheets around myself and tried to get a wink of sleep.
The drive to school was uncomfortable to say the least. Adjusting and readjusting the volume control on the radio was my nervous habit throughout our quiet drive. Every time I reached over I was afraid Castiel was going to snap at me for being a nuisance, but it seemed like he didn't hear the volume difference because he never stopped looking out the window. How were able to switch from feeling incredibly comfortable with each other to this awkwardness?
"We are here," I mumbled pulling into an empty parking space. Too late I realized that I had just pulled up next to Deborah's red mustang.
Contemplating going into reverse and backing as far away as I could the option fell apart as Deborah stepped out of her car and waved at Castiel. "I have some great news, Castiel!" She shouted as I turned my car off. "My manager said it would be great if you became our new guitarist!"
New guitarist? I stared at Castiel's leather clad back as I awaited an answer. Ignoring my quizzical stare he got out of the car. "What in the world is going on," I muttered ashamed of my ignorance on this whole matter. I did remember Castiel telling me about Deborah moving away from Sweet Amoris to pursue her music career, but nothing else was mentioned to me.
"I… I still need to think about it," Castiel said running his hand through his hair. A ring of uncertainty resounded throughout his voice.
Deborah who looked surprised that an answer had not been given right away looked at him crossly. "What is there to think about? It would just be like the old days except you would be getting paid for doing what you love!"
My lip started bleeding as I ripped at it with my teeth after hearing that statement. I couldn't offer that. I couldn't help Castiel carry out his dream so easily, so casually, as if it took her no trouble at all to hand him hope. Maybe I had misjudged Deborah, anyone who is willing to help another accomplish their dream can't be all bad, right? The pit in my stomach only grew wider, and I realized that I would have to do some digging into who Deborah was before I truly did decide to let go Castiel go.
In between busy and hectic class periods I tried talking to my friends about Deborah in the hallway.
"She has only ever been nice to me," Violette said looking vaguely confused at my question. It was hard to imagine Violette talking bad about anyone, let alone someone she considered a friend, so I moved on.
Lysander stared long and hard at me. "Why are you asking?"
Hiding anything from Lysander would be the worst thing I could do, "I have a bad feeling about her."
"I have a bad feeling about her too," Lysander said nodding in agreement.
Relief soared throughout me. "Thank goodness, I thought I was the only thinking something was fishy about her." I couldn't help but smile up at Lysander. At least someone didn't think I was crazy for questioning Deborah's motives in coming back.
"I'm sure Castiel would see it too if he wasn't so caught up in the past."
My smile dropped at those words. Even if I did prove that Deborah wasn't who she said was it was still going to bring Castiel pain. "Maybe," I whimpered sorrowfully.
Lysander stroked my head, "I'm sure Castiel isn't just following her blindly this time. I wasn't friends with him back then, but he had seemed pretty infatuated with her. I don't actually know much about Deborah myself."
"Really? Me neither. I guess I was too much of a social recluse to pay attention to her."
I realized at that moment, that while it was great Lysander believed me, he wasn't the most informed person on the happenings of this school. I was gonna need someone who knew all the latest gossip and details about everything and anything. I was gonna need Rosalya.
"Do you wanna go talk to Rosalya with me?" I inquired as I headed towards the lunchroom.
Falling into place with me Lysander gave a small smile. "You think Rosalya might know something?"
I squinted up at him not paying attention to where I was going. "Of course. Out of anyone it seems most likely that she would know the latest gossip since she loves that sort of thing. Walking into the lunchroom I tripped over my own feet and was sent hurtling towards the ground. "Oops," I stuck my arms straight out and prepared for impact.
An arm swooped down and wrapped itself around my stomach catching me before my face decided to plant itself against the floor. "Watch where you are going, Kira!" Lysander rebuked me in a teasing tone. Straightening up I couldn't help but tuck my hair behind one of my ears in a nervous twitch. Well that was humiliating!
"Sorry, Lysander. I'm kind of a clutz."
"I thought cats were supposed to be agile and graceful," Lysander said straight-faced.
I clicked my tongue to the roof of my mouth in protest. "Too bad I'm human. A human that trips over her own feet and invisible lines all the time."
Lysander nodded in consent, his silver hair bouncing slightly as he did so. "I guess no matter how much you look and act like a cat you aren't really one. How many bloody noses have you gotten since I met you?"
"Don't remind me," I huffed letting my black hair partially hide my shamed face.
Lysander grabbed a few items from the snack shack and waited for me to finish getting my cheese pizza. "You can go ahead, Lysander. I already see Rosalya at our table, so you can go tell her what I want to talk about with her." I tilted my head in the general direction of our table.
After a curt nod, Lysander headed off leaving me to wait in the lunch line. The person standing in front of me suddenly turned around only to whip me in the face with brown hair.
"I thought you liked Castiel?" Deborah said twirling a strand between her fingers.
I couldn't help but choke out, "What?" Nice going Kira. First time you talk with her without Castiel around and you sound like a total idiot.
She stabbed me in the chest with her long bony finger. "You like Lysander and Castiel? Wow, and here I thought you were a goody two shoes. Crushing on best friends is pretty low of you, Kira." My lip curled up into a snarl, but before I could come out with a sharp retort she laughed. "I'm joking! There is no need to be so serious!" My glare didn't soften. It hadn't sounded like she was kidding around. Suddenly her eyes fixated on me and her mouth drew into a hard-line. "In all seriousness, you are going to help me convince Castiel to join my band aren't you?"
I began sputtering incoherently. Was she crazy? "What?" I stuttered, once again sounding like a fool.
"You do know that this is a once in a lifetime offer for him don't you? Everyone told us that we were the best couple with me being an awesome singer, and him being the guitarist." She analyzed my reaction, but I had left my face become impassive finally as I stewed underneath. Why is she telling me this?
I grounded out, "It's not my decision, so I probably will stay-"
"I was hoping that along with getting his guitar playing skills maybe things could go back to the old days when him and I were the cutest couple!" She cut me off with a mocking laugh.
Could I just annihilate her now? Just take this lunch tray in my hands and bang it over her head until she was unconscious?
The hurricane of rage that was ripping through me got stopped short by a familiar voice. "Hey, what are you two doing?" Deborah flung her arm around my shoulders and pulled me close.
"What does it look like we are doing, Castiel? Can't two girls have a friendly chat without you butting in?" She playfully said hugging me tight. I shook her arm loose and began to near my own table.
"We were just talking," I sighed not wanting to see either of their faces. Leaving, I set my food down next to Rosalya's and across from Lysander's.
I kept my head down as I heard Castiel being dragged away by Deborah to her table. Her words stuck in my stomach like thorns making it impossible for me to find the appetite I had lost talking to her, instead I just sat down at the table with a huff. Ignoring all the commotion around me I looked between Lysander whose brow was furrowed and Rosalya who was deep in thought.
"I already told you, Kira, that she wa bad news," Rosalya moaned pinching the bridge of her nose.
I smiled and patted her back. She seemed hesitant to tell me anything. "I know, and I believe you. I want to know why and if there is any proof she can't be trusted."
Rosalya looked troubled as her painted nails dug into the palms of her hands. "Not proof. Only speculation with rumors, and my own gut."
"What rumors?" Lysander and I spoke at the same time.
Surprised Rosalya looked between us until she seemed to reach some sort of understanding. "I forgot that you two used to be the school's biggest recluses."
"Tch. I just don't like gossip in general," Lysander said folding his arms against his chest.
Those were the days. Only Rosalya, Alexy, and Armin were my friends. I had no enemies, and no drama. I wouldn't trade the present with the past though. I never had as much fun nor people I cared about. That was the tradeoff for a live of solitude for one where you socialized. Rosalya noticed my faint smile and beamed at me as if reading my thoughts. She had always worried about my loner ways.
"These are the facts.. While Castiel and Deborah were playing one day they were found by a talent scout. Deborah broke up with Castiel to pursue her musical career. Something happened between Nathaniel, Deborah, and Castiel causing the two boys to hate each other," Rosalya finished. Looking around she bent even closer to us. "These are the rumors. Deborah somehow caused the manager to only pick her for entering the new band, and Nathaniel tried to kiss Deborah to make her stay which Castiel caught and proceeded to beat the crap out of Nathaniel. That was before Deborah broke up with Castiel."
"Nathaniel and Castiel didn't always hate each other?" I asked being the most shocked at that part.
Lysander answered the question, "They never liked each other, but they didn't used to hate each other to the extreme they do now."
Looking at Deborah it was completely unimaginable to me that Nathaniel would try to kiss her. Skimpy clothing barely hiding her chest and piercings dotted throughout her body made Deborah seem completely opposite of his type.
"Maybe I should talk to the Nathaniel then," I thought out loud.
Scoffing Rosaly responded, "Good luck with that. He doesn't talk about what happened with Deborah with anybody. Nathaniel got outcasted by almost everyone when it happened. While I said it was only a rumor most of the school took it as the truth, and Nathaniel had to pay for that. He probably just doesn't want to rehash somewhat old history."
It all made sense now, the grimace plastered on Nathaniel's face when he saw Deborah. How he was one of the few students who didn't give her a warm welcome back. Even if Nathaniel refused to talk to me about her, I still needed to ask. Besides the person herself, Nathaniel was the only person that I knew of who could tell me Deborah's true nature.
"Why do you want to know?" Nathaniel sighed. I had waited until after our history test to quiz him about what happened between him Deborah. We were in our same seats as yesterday.
I couldn't help but say vaguely, "Because." I sounded stupid even to my own ears.
Nathaniel only gave me a patronizing look. Exasperated he set his crime novel down on his desk. "Jealousy," he stated like it was obvious.
I gaped at him. He knew? How did he know? The only person I officially told it to was Rosalya! Oh no. Oh no. If he figured it out who else has? I'm screwed. I'm totally screwed. Maybe, Castiel has figured it out. While I was internally shrieking, my face probably showed I was about to shit my pants out of terror any second now because Nathaniel then began to try to pacify me.
"Calm down, Kira." My hands still flapped in front of me as if I was trying to fan my face. "No one told me." That sentence only made my face scrunch up in complete crying mode.
"Who told you? Did you figure it out yourself? Oh my god. Oh my god. Who else knows? Does he know? Oh my god. Oh my god. Please don't tell him!" I harshly whispered probably not whispering at all. "I will do anything you say! Just please don't tell him!" I tried to bow my head in a begging matter, but I caused my face to accidentally smash itself into my desk.
"Holy crap, Kira! Are you okay?" Putting a concerned hand on my shoulder, Nathaniel moved me so I faced him directly. My head was spinning and my nose ached.
I woosily answered him, "I think I'm good," That was before I felt the familiar thick liquid come seeping from my nose.
Panicked Nathaniel dug some tissues from his backpack. "You have a bloody nose," he confirmed as if blood running out of my nose could be anything else.
"Don't worry. It happens all the time," I sounded drunk as I spoke. I pressed the clean tissues to my nose, but the tissues got soaked in only a few seconds.
"I'm going to take you to the nurse." Nathaniel helped me up and with a nod from the History teacher we began to step through the rows of desk. As we neared the front a hand shot out and gripped Nathaniel's arm.
The owner of the arm was Castiel himself. He was glowering at Nathaniel and ordered, "Let me take her."
Brushing off the hand Nathaniel headed me along. The ringing in my head blurred out what he said next.
"It's okay, loverboy, I'll take her to the nurse's room." And with that statement we left the classroom.