"Not Ron. Malfoy. I kissed Malfoy."

Harry stopped in his tracks and Hermione couldn't even look him in the eye. It wasn't necessarily that she was ashamed of what had happened, although she had to admit that was a little part of it, but deep down inside she didn't want her friends to think that she was a traitor. Draco Malfoy had never given Harry or Ron any reason to like him or trust him. The fact that she had kissed him... well it might make them think that her judgement was impaired. They might not trust her as much. She couldn't stand that thought.

"You did what?" Harry asked in complete disbelief.

"I didn't mean to do it. It just happened," Hermione explained running her fingers through her hair.

"How does that just happen? Did he force himself on you? I swear if he did I'll make him pay. Just because some piece of paper says that he's supposed to be your husband is no reason for him to mistreat you or take advantage of you." Hermione could see that Harrywas getting very angry and she wanted to do her best to dispel that before Ron appeared and caught on that something wasn't all right. While Draco had kissed her first, several times in fact, before she had kissed back, she knew that there had been nothing forceful about it. After all, she had kissed him back.

And enjoyed it.

"He didn't force himself on me. It was just a spur of the moment thing. I kissed him back but I had stayed up studying and I was sleepy. I just wasn't thinking properly, you know?" Apparently he didn't know because he was looking at her as if she'd just grown three very large, very ugly, heads.

"Have you ever thought that maybe he has you under the Imperius curse?" Harry asked somberly.

"That's ridiculous Harry. It was completely of my own free will and I stopped it. We've just spending a lot of time together and... and I don't know but it was a mistake and it isn't going to happen again." At least she was being honest. It couldn't happen again. In all honesty her reaction to him scared her. He made her feel like she was drowning in tinglies and butterflies and that wasn't something that she could let herself do. Drowning was bad, very bad. Still, whenever she thought about the way his lips had touched hers and the way his hand had traveled over her skin she felt a sense of longing. She was determined to make it go away.

Harry seemed like he was at a lost for words and Hermione couldn't blame him. She'd be having much the same reaction if he had been the one to kiss Draco. That thought gave her just a little bit of amusement that was completely dispelled by the appearance of Ron.

"Morning Hermione. I'm starving..." he seemed to sense that they were in the middle of a serious discussion and he stopped and then looked from one of them to the other. "Is everything okay?"

"Fine," Hermione said quickly, while giving Harry a look that she hoped said loudly and plainly, 'keep this a secret'. While Harry's reaction hadn't been good, she didn't even want to imagine what Ron would say or do. She hoped that she didn't have to find out. Obviously having Harry as a sort of confidant wasn't going to work. Hermione just wanted someone that she could tell her feelings to and who wouldn't look at her like she was insane. She quickly ran through a list of names in her head.

There wasn't one person that she thought of that didn't have an intense to deep dislike for her future husband. She shuttered at those words. Fiancee was a little bit more tolerable. All in all it seemed as if the only person she could really talk to was Dumbledore. That thought made her chuckle out loud over her cereal. She definitely did not plan to tell the Headmaster about how she had kissed Draco and was now confused, not to mention concerned, about this strange affect that he was having over her.

Teenage hormones.

After all, they were spending large amounts of times together. It probably had something to do with pheromones or something like that. He was attractive yes, and she was beginning to think of him as a friend, but that was no reason to go about kissing him and letting him kiss her back. It had been her fault for inviting him into her bed. Hermione had to admit that she was glad that she had kept that fact from Harry. Then he really would have thought that she was under the Imperius curse.

"What's up with you two today?" Ron asked in the middle of chewing a bit of pancakes.

"Nothing," both she and Harry said at once. Hermione felt bad for making him keep something from Ron but obviously Harry realized that it would do more harm than good to tell him. Or he was waiting for a better time to break the news to him. Hermione hoped that Harry would at least tell her first if he decided that Ron needed to know.

Once breakfast was over Herione looked over at the Slytherin table, wondering if she would see him. She didn't. She supposed that it was a good thing that he was still asleep. The more he got the better. After breakfast, Harry and Ron were going to go to the Quidditch Pitch with the rest of the Gryffindor team and Hermione decided to join them. She needed something to keep her occupied and tagging along didn't seem like such a bad idea. Classes were going to be starting up in a few days and Gryffindor had a match, against none other than Slytherin, next weekend so the practice was needed. Hermione was glad that she had a book with her. She usually did.

It was a nice Spring day, not terribly cold, and the sun had decided to make an appearance from behind the clouds. Hermione was glad for the good weather. As her friends flew around on their brooms she sat in the stands with the book on her lap. It took her awhile to realize that it had been several minutes since she'd even turned the page. Her thoughts were elsewhere and completely not where they ought to be.

Hermione wondered what it was about him that made him get stuck in her thoughts so much. She reminded herself of her hormone theory and that comforted her a little. A biological explanation was better than anything else she could come up with. She liked knowing the why of things and why she had Draco Malfoy on the brain was a question that needed an answer, and a good answer at that.

She wondered what his answer was for kissing her. Or if he even had one. She wasn't sure that she would be able to ask him. She was quite dreading their first meeting. Would he want to talk about it? She wanted to pretend that it had never happened. Tt was much easier to do that then to try to talk about it. What if he had a reason that was... well... unacceptable? Really, she didn't want to know.

Hermione looked down at the Pitch. Things had just gotten interesting as the Hufflepuff team had decided to practice as well. It looked like the Captains of both teams had decided to have a practice game so Hermione shut her book and decided to watch. While she wasn't a big fan of Quidditch she did occasionally find it entertaining. That, and she hoped that the zooming and whirling figures would keep her more occupied than the book had.

Hermione was surprised to find that after the match was over it was only an hour until lunch time. She followed the other Gryffindor up to their Common Room, for a mini celebration over their win against Hufflepuff. Harry had been distant the entire time and while he wasn't ignoring her she could tell that he wasn't altogether happy with her. She hoped that he was still trying to process everything and then once he was done thinking he might come to the same conclusion that she had.

That it mean nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

They all walked down to the Great Hall together. Hermione was trying to be especially talkative to make up for Harry's glum silence. She wanted another opportunity to talk to him. Maybe to explain things more, but she couldn't find a diplomatic way to get Ron to leave. Instead they all sat together eating while Hermione chattered on about nothing specific.

"How are things going now that he's back from break?" asked Ron. Hermione had been hoping to avoid this conversation. Yesterday, when she had confided in them about asking to see Draco's arm, Ron had been quite nasty about Draco. Really she couldn't blame him all that much but it was still something that she didn't like to hear. Not when she was trying her hardest to get along with him. It seemed as though she was succeeding too well though.

"Fine. I haven't seen him all that much," Hermione explained while Harry shot her a look of disapproval. Hermione felt guilty and wished that she'd never said anything. It would have been so much simpler if she would have just kept it to herself. She and Draco's little secret.

Draco woke up and yawned, dreading even the thought of getting out of bed, but glad that he'd had the most peaceful sleep that he'd had in awhile. He had no idea how long he had been asleep or what time it was. His whole body was sore but he had no intention of moving just yet. He figured that if he got out of bed and walked around a little bit he might feel better. Still, the bed was more comfortable. It was soft and warm, and he still felt like a few more hours of sleep wouldn't be a bad thing.

It was bright outside and as he closed his eyes it made it hard for him to drift back off into sleep. It had been a bad night, but tolerable. Once he had made it into his bed, sleep had come easily, at least for awhile. The nightmares had come but he hadn't woken up through any of them, at least not that he could remember. It still did not make for a very restful sleep. Nightmares were not the only thing that had interrupted his sleep.

There had also been thoughts of her.

He remembered waking up, some time around dawn and thinking of nothing but her. The night's actions seemed like a sort of dream to him but as far as he could tell what had happened between them was real. The memory of the smell of her and the warmth of her skin, the taste of her lips, was still too real in his mind for him to have imagined it. The fear in her voice when she had asked him to leave had also been too real.

Draco laid in bed wondering if she was angry with him. Last night when she had asked him to leave he wasn't sure that there had been any hint of anger in her voice. His mind again wandered to the kiss that they had shared. He felt his blood burn at the memory. Whether it had been sleep deprivation or the lingering memory of the nightmare that had made him initiate it he didn't know. He did remember how unbelievably wonderful it had felt to be near her in such a way. Even now he couldn't help but wonder what would have happened if she hadn't have stopped things.

It was for the best, he knew that much.

Draco decided that it was better that he get out of bed and stop thinking. Getting out of bed was a rather painful experience. He had spent to much time laying down and his muscles protested at the unwelcome exercise. Draco made his way to the bathroom, intent on a steaming hot shower to sooth away the aches in pains.

He was fairly certain that he fell half asleep standing up in the shower because all he could remember was the feeling of the hot water cascading over his body, not a thought in his head. Once he climbed out of the shower he had to admit that he felt a lot better. He stood in front of the mirror and smoothed his hair back and then, wrapping a towel around his waist, he opened the door and walked into the Common Room. It was just his luck that there she was, walking through the door.

They stood there for a moment standing in awkward silence. Draco was painfully aware that the only thing that was covering him happened to be a towel. Something had changed last night. The only thing he could concentrate on was the contour of her lips, the look in her eyes that spoke of confusion but he could also see desire. It took a lot of his self control not to go to her and kiss her the way he had the night before.

She cleared her throat.

"I'm glad you are awake. I was just going to stop by and make sure that you were still alive. You weren't at lunch," she said crossing her arms around her chest. He wasn't sure exactly what the gesture meant, other than she wanted him to stay away. Still, there was an influx of sexual tension in the air and he wasn't sure who was emitting more of it.

"I just woke up," he explained. So it was after lunch? He had slept longer than he thought. She was looking at his bare chest and her gaze was making it harder for him to think. "Will you wait while I go get dressed?"

Hermione nodded.

Draco went into his room and dressed before spending a minute in front of the mirror applying a generous amount of gel to his hair. If he allowed it to dry naturally it sometimes began to stick out at odd angles. Feeling much more at ease once he was dressed and looked decent he went back into the common room. She was sitting on the armchair to the left of the fireplace so he sat in the chair to the right. There was a good six or seven feet between them. Draco looked up at the grandfather clock in the corner and saw that it was just after two in the afternoon. He was surprised that he wasn't feeling hungry yet. It felt like it had been forever since he'd had anything to eat.

"Did you sleep well?" she asked while looking at the book that was sitting in her lap. She hadn't looked at him at all. He studied her for a moment. Her eyes didn't look like they were traveling across the page. In fact, it looked like she was trying to look distracted. He wanted to know why.

"As well as usual. About last night..."

"I'd really rather not talk about it. People do strange things in the middle of the night when they are half asleep."

Draco wandered if that was her excuse or his? Or both of theirs?

"So you regret it?" he asked lightly.

"Yes. Of course," she said hurriedly. There was a long pause that lasted longer than it should have. "Don't you?"

Draco thought about it for more than a minute and he could tell that it was making her uncomfortable. Did he really regret it? He didn't know. He did know that it shouldn't have happened. It complicated things more than they already were. But he couldn't say he felt all that much regret. In fact, if he was being honest...

"No."

"No?" she questioned, looking at him in a way that made him wonder if he'd accidentally told her that he was a Death Eater. He wasn't sure the look of disgust could be much worse. Those words in his head, Death Eater, brought with it a new conflict that he had resolved with himself last night. He was determined, by whatever means necessary, that he wasn't going to be his father. He had a few months until he had to go home, and take her with him, but for those few months he was going to be himself. He wasn't going to manipulate her, he wasn't going to hurt her, he wasn't going to do anything.

Most of all he wasn't going to tell her the truth.

Since their engagement, there was only one thing that he had really lied about, and that was the fact that he was a Death Eater, or nearly so. There were, of course, the little lies that had gone along with that, but for the most part he had tried to be as honest with her as possible. He was going to keep it that way for as long as possible. No more dishonesty unless she again asked him flat out if he was a Death Eater. He was at least going to marry her honestly.

That thought struck him as amusing but in his own twisted way he meant it. One lie wasn't that much. If he spent the next three or so months manipulating her, deceiving her, lying to her, then he wasn't sure he would be able to live with himself. Once they were married maybe he would tell her. It would be that much harder for her to leave him. Perhaps she would help him find some way around his father's plans. After they were married he would tell her everything. That thought lifted an incredible weight from his shoulders. He wasn't going to be a liar forever.

"I thought it was nice, didn't you?" he asked impishly, feeling better than he had in a week. He wanted her to admit it but by the color rising in her cheeks but he wasn't sure that was going to happen.

"It was inappropriate," she said shortly, again pretending to pay no attention to him as she engrossed herself in her book.

"How is that?" he asked curiously. Hermione didn't even look up at him. He could tell that she was flustered and not amused.

"Students should not be doing what we were doing in the middle of the night." Her eyes never left the book.

"I believe we are the exception to the rule. After all we have rooms right across from each other. There are no enchantments to keep me out of yours, unlike the female dormitories in the other Houses. I'm sure Dumbledore is hoping that by summer you'll be pregnant with a child to name after him." The scathing look of furious annoyance that she graced him with was well worth it. "In all seriousness you are my fiance. Is it so bad that I wouldn't mind kissing you?"

"Yes."

"So it would be worse if I told you I thoroughly enjoyed it?"

"Yes!"

"And that I wouldn't mind doing it again?" He didn't get an answer because in a matter of seconds she had stood up, the book flying through the air in his general direction, and her bedroom door slamming shut with her behind it.

For the first time in a while Draco felt like himself.

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