A/N: Sorry for the long wait everyone! You know the excuse for this time of year. Finals. They make life much more difficult, but I'm done now and can write to my heart's content between family time.

Wow. This is the longest thing I've ever written no my own. I still can't quite get my head around it. Part III will mostly be wrapping everything up in a nice, neat little package for you. If you have any questions please let me know, and I'll try to address them in the fic. I have completely redone Iruka's past from what it was when I originally started this, but it still works (except for the scar- shoot!) so I'll be using as much of my new version as possible.

Also, because several of you have asked: I don't know for sure if Orochimaru was Iruka's sensei. I read the idea in Soelle's fic "Two Truths, One Lie, and Uncertain Amount of Love" and liked the idea. As I watched the show, I picked up subtle clues. Like Iruka staying for Sasuke's match, but leaving before Naruto's turn. Hhhhmmm…

Also, for those that were confused, the arena in which Kakashi and Iruka fought was underground. So there was no sunlight, just the same artificial lights they were used to. Sorry about that confusion!

All The Broken Pieces
Part III: Chapter 1

'Come on, Iruka, you can do it. Breathe in. Breathe out. This is Tsunade. She's not going to hurt you.'

It had become Iruka's mantra the last several minutes as the Hokage continued to inspect his injuries. The moment she'd stepped in to his personal space it had triggered an intense fight-or-flight response within him. His breath started to come in short gasps and ever muscle tensed for action.

It had been the same with Guy. The moment Kakashi was not there, it was all Iruka could do not to panic. Guy had had to hold him down until he'd gotten himself back under control. It was embarrassing and, more than that, worrisome.

He knew he should have expected that reaction. It would be nearly impossible to go through what he had and not suffer some sort of trauma from it. He only hoped it wouldn't last very long. Children needed to touch and be touched. He couldn't teach until he'd gotten over this new set of panic attacks.

It had taken three years to recover from the forced withdrawal into himself and skittishness around others that training under Orochimaru had caused. And that had been with Sarutobi's constant help and guidance. He wasn't so sure that Tsunade would, or could, offer him that same kind of instruction.

"You need a good bath," Tsunade observed quietly. Iruka personally agreed, though he wasn't so sure that everything he was coated in would ever come off. He was sure there would be phantom smells of chili pepper on him for years.

Tsunade placed a gentle finger on his back, and Iruka's breath stopped.

"I could heal these," she whispered without moving, and Iruka let his breath out slowly. Control. He needed to be in control.

"But?"

"But it's best to let them heal on their own. If we use chakra to heal everything, your body will forget how to heal itself. It's best to let wounds that can heal without help do so."

Okay, that made sense. It sucked, but it made sense.

Tsunade removed her hand and stepped back, allowing Iruka time to begin breathing normally again.

"I can pretty well guess what happened while you were being held captive," she said, walking around to stand in front of him. Iruka watched her warily. He couldn't help it, and once she was where he could keep an eye on her he felt infinitely more relaxed.

"Yes, Tsunade-sama."

"I must say that I'm impressed with how well you held up, Iruka. The torture methods they used were extreme. After your Jounin exam they have special courses to cope with this kind of stress, and I'm very proud of you for staying as strong as you did without those classes. Most chuunin level shinobi would have broken."

Iruka smiled wryly. "I survived my sensei, Tsunade-sama. Most things after that are manageable."

"Yes, I suppose so," Tsunade said, and she sounded sad. She sighed, dropping her impressive folded arms stance. "What I'm not clear on is what happened when you attacked the torture specialist. Kakashi's version of events was broken at best, and all three of your rescuers had a slightly different version. I'd like it if you told me what happened, please."

He didn't want to talk about it. Didn't want to talk about ANYTHING that had happened there. He just wanted to get clean, eat something, and sleep for years until this whole thing was nothing but a distant memory. He knew she wouldn't allow that, and the more reasonable part of his brain understood the reasons. He still didn't like it.

"Once I'd discovered what was going on from one of the genin…I'm sure Kakashi told you about them…" He waited until Tsunade nodded the affirimtive. "I knew the only way to stop their plan to over throw the Raikage and ally with Orochimaru was to kill their leader. I got to the stairs leading to him as quickly as I could and found that they were already open."

Tsunade nodded again. "Anko told me that they'd opened those doors to make for a quick escape once they had you both. They hadn't expected you to find them."

Iruka smiled a bit at that. "Once there, I ran up the stairs. They weren't paying attention to me. They seemed to still be looking for us below. I attacked the leader. I…I would know him anywhere…even though he didn't have his mask on I knew. The guards were too surprised to do anything or…"

"Anko had them under a genjutsu, if that's what you're wondering."

Iruka nodded again. "I took him so off guard; he didn't have a chance to react before I had him pinned to the wall. I set the technique up almost on instinct. After that, Anko and the others showed up and I'm sure it's all the same after that."

Tsunade nodded a final time, sighing and stepping forward slightly to inspect his eyes. "Would you have had the chakra to perform the technique?"

Iruka smiled a little at that, even if it was one that completely lacked any happiness behind it. "I don't know. At the time I sure thought I'd be able to pull it from somewhere. Maybe I would have."

"I'm glad you didn't. I'd hate to have to tell your students why their favorite teacher was never coming back." Tsunade smiled sadly at him, brushing his bangs back gently. Iruka flinched at her touch, but she ignored it. "They've missed you terribly. I'll let them come see you when you're feeling up to it. I'm sure it would help everyone."

Iruka closed his eyes and nodded. He didn't want his students to see him like this, and he certainly wasn't up to seeing them just yet. Soon, though. At seventeen he'd discovered the healing properties of children, and he would be happy to see them again. Let their innocence soothe his jaded soul like it had done then.

"Do you think you can manage to bathe yourself? And be honest with me, Iruka."

"Yes, Hokage-sama."

Tsunade studied him a while longer before stepping back toward the door. "The bathroom is through there. It has a shower, clean towels, and hospital gown waiting for you. Take as long a shower as you need, the hot water is unlimited. Once you're done, ring for a nurse and she'll bring you some food. After that, you're under strict orders to sleep. Got it?"

"Yes, Hokage-sama," Iruka said meekly. She was almost out the door when he yelled for her again. "Hokage-sama?"

"Yes?"

"I…How's Kakashi?"

Tsunade smiled at him as she looked back in the room, her hazel eyes shining with something Iruka couldn't quite read. "The brat's fine. Dehydrated and suffering from extreme chakra exhaustion, but he'll be fine in no time. If we can keep him in bed instead of demanding to see you."

Iruka blushed, looking down at his bare feet, as Tsunade shut the door.

One hour later, Iruka was clean, warm, and fed. He hated hospital food, generally, but right now it was the best thing he'd ever eaten. It was warm, it required no effort to chew and swallow, and he knew it wasn't poisoned. Life was all about the simple comforts, really.

Now he was lying on his uninjured side, trying to force his body to sleep. He'd been able to rest fitfully while being carried in turns by the Jounin, but whenever he did sleep it had been filled with nightmares of the last few weeks, or where their rescue had been a dream and he and Kakashi were still trapped. Somehow, he knew if he fell asleep now it would be the same thing. Idly, he thought of ringing a nurse and asking for some heavy sedatives.

A soft knock at the door drew him from his mental menu of the things he'd tried as a teenager to help him sleep without nightmares- what had worked and what hadn't.

"Who is it?"

"Might Guy," came the cheery, if subdued (for Guy) response.

Iruka blinked a couple of times, taken off guard by the answer. He didn't know who it was he'd been expecting, but Guy certainly hadn't been it. "Come in, Guy-sensei."

The tall Jounin walked in, carrying with him the biggest basket of fruit Iruka had ever seen. It was all he could do to stifle a laugh as Guy's bushy eyebrows appeared over the top of the pineapple perched on the top of the gift.

"Guy-sensei, what is that?"

"It is a get well gift for you, Iruka-sensei."

Iruka continued to stare opened mouthed at him. "But that must have cost a fortune! Some of the fruits are really rare, and they're huge…"

The basket was set on the bed side table so that Guy could strike his nice guy pose, his teeth somehow flashing even in the dim artificial lights of the hospital room. "There's no need to worry about that Iruka-sensei. You should just focus on recovering your strength."

Iruka did chuckle then, a little bit. It felt good. "Thank you, Guy-sensei. I appreciate your concern."

"Aa," Guy said, waving it off in a manner similar to Kakashi. "How are you, really, Iruka-sensei?"

"Better now that I'm clean," Iruka answered honestly. Though he was seriously thinking of cutting his hair as he was sure the tangles were never going to come out. "Is there something I can help you with, Guy-sensei?"

Guy took a seat by Iruka's bed; carefully keeping his hands were Iruka could see them. It was a small gesture, but Iruka appreciated it anyway. He was helping to keep him relaxed without making it seem like he was looking down upon him. Never let it be said that Guy was insensitive. Brash, but not insensitive. "My eternal rival and I have discussed much of what happened."

"Oh," Iruka said, blinking slowly. He wasn't sure what else he was supposed to say to that. If Guy thought he was discussing what he'd been through then he was crazier than Iruka thought, but if he wanted something else then Iruka was completely lost.

"Yes. You are truly a man full of love and compassion, Iruka-sensei."

Now Iruka was really confused. Guy was still looking at him with a serious look on his face, and it so ill suited him that Iruka was almost tempted to laugh. Where on earth was Guy going with all of this?

"I told you once that you would find the answers to your questions when you were ready for the responsibility that went with them, do you remember?"

Iruka nodded slowly. Had it really only been three weeks ago? It felt so much longer than that.

"You showed my eternal rival perhaps more love and compassion during a time when you could have blamed him for your suffering then he has perhaps known in his whole life."

Blame Kakashi for what happened? The thought had never even entered Iruka's mind and it seemed utterly ridiculous to even SUGGEST that he could have. Of course none of this was Kakashi's fault. He'd just been doing what he thought was best as the field commander, and he'd suffered just as much as Iruka had…

Besides, Kakashi had saved him. He'd been dying that night, he knew it. It had been cold and getting darker. Kakashi's voice had nearly faded away. But then Kakashi had done something, and the next morning he'd been alive.

Blaming the other man for that whole mess wouldn't have been fair, and Iruka was about to tell Guy so when the black-haired Jounin held up his hand to keep him quiet.

"Not everyone would have been as kind as you Iruka-sensei, nor as strong. All of this has impressed my eternal rival greatly. He thinks very highly of you, and cares for you."

Kakashi…Kakashi cared?

Iruka mentally kicked himself. Of course Kakashi cared. They were comrades, teammates. Kakashi had cared for him during their torture. Yes, he cared. So why did having Guy say it out loud make his stomach do flips?

"It is for this reason that I have decided I can tell you his story now, if you still wish to hear it and help him. I now believe you are capable of doing what you expressed to me you wanted to."

Guy would tell him Kakashi's past now? He could finally know all that had happened to the older man and help him? He could show Kakashi that he understood! He could really help him now, finally, instead of just being a burden.

And yet…and yet something felt off. Yes, he still wanted the information. He still wanted to ease the pain he'd seen in Kakashi's eyes; that he'd watched increase over the last several weeks. He still wanted all of that but…he didn't want Guy to be the one to tell him.

Iruka smiled at the Jounin kindly, carefully meeting his eyes. He was not broken. He was NOT. "I appreciate it, Guy, I really do. It's just…if anyone is going to tell me…I want it to be Kakashi. I want him to want my help. Do you understand?"

Guy smiled then, this time lacking in the sparkling effects. Iruka thought this made the smile seem more genuine, but didn't say so. "Of course, Iruka-sensei. Now I know you will be able to help Kakashi…and yourself. I wish you the best of luck with my eternal rival. He is not an easy person to deal with, but I am sure you will manage somehow."