"I'll crush you like a bug!"
A blue orb of chakra formed around Naruto's palm. With a cry he charged the figure in front of him. The enemy simply increased the size of his scowl. Naruto's teeth tipped into the primordial fangs of an animal. The blue ball rushed towards the enemy's chest. A swirling, condensed hurricane of death.
"Please."
Naruto's eyes widened in shock as he turned to see the orange haired man behind him. The scowler had a hand firmly attached to Naruto's wrist.
How did he move so fast?
The orange haired man had a hand on Naruto's wrist. Naruto's ears filled with his angry growl as his arm shook with the effort, of not moving.
"Oh, are you trying to break free?" the man asked, concerned about the growls that poured out of Naruto's throat.
With a scream and a sharp yank Naruto ripped his arm free of the enemy's strong grip. His feet landed at the other end of the field, a clearing surrounded by forest. He turned to face his foe. His hands formed a simple shape.
"Shadow Clone jutsu!"
Three Narutos appeared around him. Their arms rose into the air. A light blue shape appeared above the outstretched palms. The shape began to take on a familiar form, a throwing star, a shruiken.
"You're dead!" The Narutos released their raishuriken. The weapon flew towards the enemy. In a series of jumps the chakra came closer and closer to the man. Naruto's eyes had trouble following the raishuriken, there was no way that this guy could follow even react. This fight was over. He was about to be—then the orange haired man disappeared.
What?
Naruto felt that same inescapable grip on his hips! A faint breeze coursed through the leaves. Naruto shivered as he felt the hands move up to his chest. His body was pulled back. He felt himself pressed up against a hard, strong chest.
"What are you doing?"
"Shh, it's all right." Naruto's eyes seemed to shake in terror as he felt warm breath grace the back of his neck. "Just think of Sasuke," said Ichigo before he kissed the blonde.
"Tomo!" screamed Kagura, "You can't just turn everything into yaoi!"
"Why not?"
"It doesn't even make sense! You did it with Dual Survival, Twilight, Hetalia, Dragon Ball Z, and even Pokémon!"
"What?" asked Tomo, "are you so bent out of shape about? I like yaoi and besides Ash certainly didn't hate Paul."
"He's ten years old!"
"What?" cried Tomo, incredulous, "How is he still ten?"
"At the beginning of Black and White the narrator said he was ten," Kagura shrugged.
"That makes no sense but whatever, at least I'm not like Yomi, she turns everything into yuri!"
"What do you mean?"
"She wrote about Kaorin and Sakaki, Kaorin and Chihiro, you and Sakaki, me and Sakaki, and me and you!" Tomo's face looked like Kimura had snuck up on her while she was in the shower.
Kagura's eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. Then her mouth switched from shocked to speculative. "Do you think Yomi might be a lesbian?"
"Hey Osaka!" said Chihiro, "what are you up to today?"
"I failed my exam," she whimpered.
"That's horrible! I feel so bad for you, what class?"
"Math."
"Meh," said Chihiro with a shrug, "I don't think it'll mean anything in the long run."
"Ya think so?"
"What did you want to be again?"
"A PE teacher like Ms. Kurosawa!"
"Uh," Chihiro paused, "Osaka, I don't know how to say this but, are you out of your mind? You, a PE teacher?"
"Did I say PE? I meant an English teacher like Kimura was...no wait, he taught something else."
"Why would you want to be like him?"
"I never said that," Osaka gave her a concerned look, "Why the heck would I wanna be like a pervert?"
"Sorry," said Chihiro, "I guess I misinterpreted what you said."
Kyon sat at the club room table. He'd been told to wait there for some reason by Haruhi. He was getting impatient with her, but then again she had those powers. Now a noise at the door told him that whatever he was asked to wait for had arrived. Koizumi?
"Fuck it," said Kyon, "I'm leaving."
"I like the sound of that," said Itsuki, "where to?"
"Please," said Kyon, "Don't follow me."
"You little pervert," Koizumi teased, "your mind instantly jumps to the dirtiest possibility."
"Oh be qui—"
"I like that," said Itsuki his smile gaining an unusual—
"Tomo, you're doing it again!"
"If you don't like it why are you reading it?"
"My Xbox is in for repairs and you said we were gonna go have fun somewhere!"
"Oh yeah, whoops!" she said with an awkward smile. "Say, you wanna borrow some of my manga? Maybe that'll convince you to accept my—"
"Absou-lutely not!"
"Then why are you blushing?" Tomo teased, "you're afraid to admit it aren't you Boobzilla?"
"I am not blushing!"
"You know some of the guys look a little like Ken—"
"Don't bring him up!"
"You are interested," she smiled.
"Not that much." Kagura's gaze focused to the side.
"Why don't we go see what Minamo's boyfriend is like?" asked Tomo, "that sounds like fun."
"Actually he's not her boyfriend."
"Whatever let's just go, before I find more of Yomi's weird yuri fanfic." Tomo shivered. "I'm just glad that she doesn't make fanart."
"Uh, I just found this sketch book under the couch."
"Burn it, now."
"It's just some Bleach chibis. You're so paranoid."