Chapter Twenty

Eros stood watching as Peter slept. He'd moved his son back to his own room the previous night, after A'lars had pronounced him back to normal, and he had stayed close all night, struggling to think of how he could tell Peter the harsh truth- that he'd had to leave Gamora behind, and she was most likely d- No. He would never tell Peter that. Besides, there was no proof she was dead... But if Peter suspected she was alive, it was almost certain he would try and demand they rescue her. Eros ran his hands through his already untidy hair. What a mess.

Peter turned over, mumbling, and his eyes opened slowly. He blinked in the daylight. "Dad?"

"Hey. You alright?" Eros could hear the sadness in his own voice, and just hoped Peter couldn't.

Peter sat up, rubbing his eyes. "Think so... How'd I get back to my room? I thought I was downstairs..."

"I brought you back after you fell asleep. How're you feeling?"

"Again, I'm ok- wait, you've been here all night?"

Eros nodded. "I didn't feel like leaving you, after..." He shook his head, taking a deep breath. Why was this so hard to say? "And... I know in the past, I haven't been the parent I should, but... I want to change things. if you ever need to talk, or..."

Peter eyed him. "Dad, have you hit your head or something? You're not acting like yourself."

Eros managed a wry smile. "I guess I deserve that. But I am serious. This might never have happened if I'd paid more attention to you, and not only thought of myself."

Peter frowned. "But... it was Thanos' fault, not yours. You didn't make him do all this to me."

Eros got to his feet in agitation. "He shouldn't have had the chance!"

"Dad, I'm safe now. It won't happen again."

"No, it won't. I will never let you down that badly again." Eros' voice nearly broke.

With shock, Peter realised his father actually had tears in his eyes. He looked away, feeling a little awkward. He and Eros didn't do emotional talks. Time to change the subject. "Is Gamora settling in ok?"

Eros avoided his gaze. Peter's heartrate quickened. "She's not seriously hurt, is she? I don't remember how we got out of there!"

Eros took a deep breath. "Peter-"

"She's not in trouble, is she? I know she was sent to help Thanos capture me, but she'd been brainwashed, it wasn't her fault! And I do know she helped us get out- she brought me to find you on Sanctuary. You can't tell me she's being punished for that! You have no idea what she's been through!"

Eros' heart withered and died inside him as Peter spoke. When he finally managed to speak, his voice came out flatly. "She isn't being held captive here."

Peter was almost certain his blood had turned cold. "Did... did Thanos' forces kill her?" They can't have, she deserved so much better than that, she saved us!

"No." Eros' voice was barely audible, and he couldn't make himself look at Peter. At least, I don't think so. He wouldn't let her off that easily...

Peter blinked several times. "What do you mean, no? You're not making sense!" He clenched his fists. "Where is she?!"

Eros opened his mouth, prepared to force the words out and face the consequences, but A'lars chose that moment to walk in. The older Eternal placed his hand on Eros' shoulder before looking solemnly at Peter.

"You need to calm down. You've only just woken after a traumatic psychic experience, and aggravating yourself is unwise."

Peter clenched his teeth. "I'll calm down when someone explains where Gamora is!"

Eros winced. I can't do this.

A'lars squeezed his shoulder, having picked up on the thought, and took over, sitting in the chair next to Peter's bed. "You will need to be adult about this."

"About what?" Peter's heart began to pound again. He was beginning to realise that when his grandfather got the words out, he probably wasn't going to like the sound of them.

A'lars looked stern, but his eyes were full of sorrow. "Once Thanos had you and your father in Sanctuary, the priority was to get you out. From what Eros has told me, Gamora understood that."

The blood drained from Peter's face. "What do you mean?"

"Understand that none of us, least of all your father, wanted this to happen, but there was no way to extract your friend."

Peter leapt out of bed, rounding on Eros, eyes blazing. "You left her there?!"

Eros flinched, hanging his head. "Peter, we would all still be Thanos' captives if-"

"I can't believe you did that!" Peter was in no mood to listen to his father's explanation. "All that talk about wanting things to be different, and you're just as selfish as ever!"

Eros' face crumpled, though part of him knew he deserved this. What was that poor girl going through right now?

"Enough!" A'lars' voice was authoritative. "What's done is done. Gamora made a heroic choice in saving you, and she will be honoured for that. But the past cannot be changed. Raging will not alter facts. You need to calm yourself."

"Easy for you to say! Do you know what he might be doing to her?! Some of the things she told me..." Peter's hands shook. And Thanos will be angrier than ever now we've gotten away!

A'lars face set as Eros flinched at Peter's choice of words- of course, Peter didn't know what Thanos had done to their mother...

A'lars' voice was carefully controlled when he spoke. "I am well aware of what Thanos does to his captives. Far more so than a boy of fifteen. I suggest you calm down. I will return when I have done the same." He strode away, keeping a firm grip on the grief that was rising inside him. Sui-San...my poor wife... He shuddered. What if young Gamora was suffering the same fate? Leaning against a wall, he buried his face in his hands. What could he do about it if she was?

Back in Peter's room, Eros tentatively approached a still-fuming Peter, hands raised. "I'm sorry. You're right to be angry." His face was haggard with guilt. "I keep replaying the scene in my mind, trying to see how I could have..." He finally met Peter's gaze, and let his son see the pain he was in. "I swear, I would not have left her behind if I had thought there was any other way. Can you trust me on that?" Though stars know he has no reason to trust me on anything.

Peter grudgingly nodded. His father might be shallow sometimes, but he knew he'd never deliberately leave a child to suffer. He jumped suddenly. "Can't we send a force out to rescue her?"

Eros sighed. "We could ask, but I doubt Father will allow it."

"What? But..."

"Thanos' defences are almost impenetrable under normal circumstances. I was able to get through because he wanted me to, so he could gloat. Father may not want to risk sending in a large number of our people, when Thanos will be even more guarded than usual, especially considering that Gamora may be past help." Eros hated speaking this bluntly of the matter, but if he didn't explain it in these terms, quash Peter's fantasy now, it would only hurt him more when A'lars refused.

Peter swallowed several times, looking incredibly vulnerable. "You think she's dead."

"No, I don't. Thanos will still hope to re-convert her. He will not waste the life of an asset so easily." Eros backed up as Peter glared at him. "I'm speaking like Thanos would, not saying what I think!"

Peter nodded slowly, hating that this made sense. His heart still broke for his friend. "So we don't know for sure?"

"No." Eros sighed. He knew he was only prolonging his son's hopes, but he couldn't bear to destroy them.

Peter chewed his lip. "If we ever get a chance... can we go after her? I know Grandfather won't let it happen, but you and I could..."

"It's too dangero-"

"Too dangerous to go into Sanctuary, I know, but if we ever hear that she's been seen elsewhere... " Peter held Eros' gaze. "Don't we at least owe it to her to try?"

Eros bowed his head, ceding that point. "But you know it could be years... or we may never find anything out..."

"I know, I know, but... if, someday..." Peter's eyes were pleading.

Eros put an arm round Peter's shoulders, already having agreed in his heart. Peter was right. "If we ever get a chance. We will try and save her. I promise."

Peter leaned against Eros' shoulder. "Thank you... Father."

Eros smiled, feeling both happy and sad as he and his son gazed up into the sky. We will find her. No matter how long it takes. Someday, Gamora will be free again.

~ End of Part One ~