Chapter 21
Hello everyone, how are we today? Good? Yeah? That's good. :D
So once again I'm thanking all my reviewers for such great support on the story. It gives me fuzzies in my stomach, hehe.
So now I have a very serious question to ask. How do you all feel about lemons?
Not saying its going to happen right away or ever if you guys don't want it but I'd like some different views. It will um…certainly be different for me because I'm pretty shy when it comes to stuff like that but, it's up to you.
Let me know.
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Asch stroked the replica's pure black locks as she slept soundlessly in his arms. She had cried herself to sleep that night, all the while begging him to come up with a different solution to this war problem.
He had remained, for the most part, silent. How could he explain to such a fighter that he didn't want her to have to fight anymore?
'Why can't you be happy with peace?' he wanted to ask more than anything. Why didn't she want him to allow this for her? It was hard to know how her mind worked, why such a young girl would want to follow him into something as disgusting and mutated as the art of war.
But their love wasn't disgusting. It felt right.
For once, and for the first time since he had realized he loved her, this love made sense to him. They were worried sick about each other, more than anything else in the world.
It was this worry that kept them both safe, and when the same worry turned them against each other, one would have to lose. It would be her. He loved her more.
He didn't want to have to go to war, but it was his place now. The emperor himself had requested it, almost demanded it. He remembered walking out of the emperor's chambers that one night after Sin had long ago been dismissed, he remembered shaking his head and wondering why the emperor had requested such a thing so soon.
But the next factor was that she needed to have a stable life. There could be no more confusion or the mark would allow her thoughts to become tangled again, regardless of his fonons there to help her out.
"Don't leave…" Sin suddenly whispered in her sleep, her voice constricted.
Asch blinked, realizing he had accidentally halted the stroking that kept her soothed, his hand resting on her waist. He resumed the motion quickly, a comforting motion to not just her, but to him as well.
"I have to…" he replied quietly. It was only to make himself feel better, for she could not hear him.
She spoke again quietly, so he almost didn't catch it. "Take me with you…"
The God-General narrowed his emerald eyes. Was that what her inner thoughts were leading her to? To the idea that instead of making him stay, she would go along?
"Not a chance."
But she was sleeping. She didn't hear him.
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The bed was empty beside him the next morning, to his confusion.
He searched the room just as he had the time before; he searched for a note from her.
There was none though.
A quiet chime sang in his head and he blinked. She wanted her weapons, but it didn't sound terribly urgent.
'Training room?' he guessed impulsively while agreeing. But why did she want to go there now?
His walk there was slow but easy. When he opened the door he found her sitting on the floor tiredly, deep breaths making her chest rise and fall.
"Good morning," she stated politely, but she was staring ahead in thought.
He nodded unsurely, not quite sure what the whole purpose of her rushing here was. And why so early?
"What are you doing?" the God-General asked bluntly.
"Training…though it certainly took you long enough to wake up."
His eyes narrowed, he couldn't stop the suspicious action. "Training for what?"
She cracked a smile and turned to look at him. She seemed oddly at peace this morning.
"War."
He dismissed her weapons.
"No. You're not coming."
"Yeah, I think I will."
"No, and don't even bother trying to argue."
"I'm not going to argue."
"You're not going to war either."
"How are you going to stop me?"
He couldn't find a suitable reply to that question. When the time finally came, how would he stop her? All she needed was a lead – a direction – in the way he and the army was headed. It wasn't exactly easy to cover up such a large mass of soldiers.
Sin came towards him as he struggled noticeably with this new logic.
She laughed, but he really didn't see what was funny. "Sin-"
"-Train me Asch. I'll get even stronger."
"That's not-" he began but paused, cutting his own sentence off.
The replica thought the reason he wanted her to stay behind was because she wasn't strong enough.
He pressed his lips together tightly; a good and bad idea combined slipping helpfully into his thoughts.
"Maybe…" he said out loud, pretending to cave in just a bit for her benefit at the moment. Her eyes lit up and he knew he'd have to follow through with this for good. He felt disgusted with himself this time though, it would be worse than the last.
Because Asch knew Sin'kara would never surrender willingly.
And it was just the way he wanted to spend his time.
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Sin's P.o.v.
"Parry!" Asch shouted to her over the clang of steel upon steel.
Sin gritted her teeth but was pleased at this new turn in him. She slammed her weapons hard against his and showed him the parry that he wanted to see. He wanted to see everything she had right now; she could feel his gaze on her as they continued the match. She knew she would be far from winning this but he had to understand that she would do anything to stay with him.
Out of the ordinary, his foot shot out and almost tripped her up.
"Hey, hey-" she laughed at the new action similar to her own. He gave her one of those rare few smiles.
She was exhausted beyond words. It seemed like he wasn't going to allow a break until she had dropped to the floor and wasn't able to stand. That was fine with her though; all she wanted to do was prove to him that she could keep going, that he wouldn't have to look after a child on the battlefield.
"Hey, that man from before, who-" she narrowly dodged one of his wide sweeps. "-who is he? It seemed like you almost knew each other."
A kind of grim smile appeared on his face. "Should have blocked that."
"My bad. The question?" she huffed while attempting a quick double-jab.
He turned them both aside. "Barely know him, but it's easy to guess what makes him angry."
A light flicked on in her head, even though she was trying to keep track of a bunch of things at the moment. "Is he like someone from Auldrant?"
"Yeah, only with a few more anger issues." He shuffled out of the way of her drilling thrust, and then clanged his weapon upon hers to make sure she didn't follow through with something else. She pulled back to recover.
"Really? What was his name? Were you friends?"
"Largo, and I don't think he knows that word."
"What word?"
"Friends."
Sin tried to laugh but it came out as a yelp as a slash came at her. Trying to process the information, she accidentally ducked.
"Wrong." She heard him state and in the next moment, she was flat on her back with him towering over her, his sword almost touching her neck.
She decided to stay down and sneak a break.
"Ugh…" she sighed with a smile and a deep breath.
"You can't say anything." He warned.
She furrowed her eyebrows. "What, why?"
He leaned down and crouched over her, making her stiffen.
"Because…" he said quietly while his hand came up to her face, "You're dead."
Then he flicked her nose playfully.
She flinched at the action but burst out laughing while rolling her eyes.
"Haha. Get off me."
He laughed a little too before standing up.
Sin pushed herself to her feet with one motion and steadied herself, her legs and arms were feeling tired from the days training. It seemed like she hadn't done simple training in forever, let alone with just Asch.
The balcony doors were open wide, allowing the chilly winter breeze to slip in. It didn't feel chilly to her though, not after that work out.
"Why did you duck on a vertical strike?" the God-General asked while sheathing his sword. "You haven't made that mistake in a long time."
He dismissed her weapons next and she gratefully took in the reduced weight.
"I was wondering why that man was so mad at you…"
Asch winced noticeably. "I took his position. He feels he is being replaced. He is no longer a part of the war."
Sin fell silent. Whoever was in charge of assigning positions would be the first she would go after. Why would someone take that man out to put Asch in? Who was to say that Asch was really stronger? And why was this man no longer in the war? It was so unfair.
Asch's arms curved around her, snapping her out of her thoughts and back to reality. She let a breath out but allowed a small smile onto her face.
"You look so troubled." He stated helpfully over her shoulder.
"It's nothing."
"Such a convenient answer…" he replied sarcastically.
She shook her head and turned into him, wrapping her arms around his neck, though she had to stand on the tips of her toes to do it.
"We'll be alright…" he whispered and she grinned. Somehow when he said it, it sounded more convincing then when she said it to herself.
A peaceful moment passed as they stayed wrapped up in each other. Sin breathed deeply, allowing him to restore her energy. His strong arms always felt like a sanctuary.
'I'm so lucky…' she smiled.
But suddenly that thought was swept away from her as a heated shock shot through her. Her knees buckled and she gasped, but his grasp around her kept her upright. That burning need for something more than just his presence scared her a little. It wasn't a desire she understood.
Sin pulled her head away hastily from his shoulder, only to see a hardened but thoughtful expression on his face. He was staring at the mark on her neck.
"H-hey, why did you do that?" the replica asked with wide orange eyes. Her spine was still buzzing with the feeling.
His green eyes flicked to hers and that caused her to blink and lean even further away. His expression was so dark. What happened to the peaceful Asch that held her comfortingly just moments ago?
She attempted to pull away, uncertain, but his hug tightened.
He spoke. "I'm sorry. Are you alright?"
Her eyes narrowed in confusion.
'You didn't answer my question…'
"Uh…yeah. I'm fine."
He loosened his grip and allowed her to sit down on the floor. The moment her arms were free she covered the mark with her hand. She avoided his face as he knelt down beside her.
"I forgot about the effect it could have," he explained as she stared at the floor.
Sin nodded her head slowly. "It's alright…it was just more of a shock then anything…I…" she trailed off.
"Forgot it was there?" he finished for her. She nodded again sadly.
"I didn't mean to remind you…"
'I know…'
"I'll forgive you if you help me up."
He raised an eyebrow and she grinned. Then he offered his hand and pulled her to her feet.
"Can I have a piggy back?" she asked mischievously as well. He shook his head with tiny smile, but it was just because he didn't know what she was getting from all this.
"I'm not forgiven from helping you up?"
"Hmm….nope!"
He scowled lightly with humor. "Fine, get on."
She buried her smiling face into his crimson red hair as he carried her to the door. He hadn't meant it; he hadn't kissed her there on purpose.
'I love you.'
"Carry me outside!"
"What, I'm still not forgiven? You got your piggy back!"
"You've taken like two steps!"
"Try seventeen…"
"Fine, four and a half."
"How about I stand here until you forgive me?"
"But I want to go outside!"
"Then forgive me!"
"Alright fine! Forgiven!"
He dumped her off with a charming smirk sent over his shoulder. She scowled sarcastically from the floor, still been expecting the piggyback to be a part of the deal.
She launched herself to her feet. "Race you outside! You're forgiven entirely if you win!"
"Wow that was easy." He stated, even though they hadn't even moved yet.
"Tch. Go!"
He was forgiven.
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The days from there on out passed peacefully, easily. Sin knew she would be going to that war with him. Besides her little mistakes on the first day, she had been doing very well. She parried everything she was supposed to, now easily being able to distinguish when the time and the type of attack were right to do so.
They went everyday to the training room. She couldn't imagine ever having a better teacher than him – ever. She learned from just watching him, even when they weren't training, just the way he moved and even the way he talked helped drill the lessons into her head. He began to push her harder, to correct even the smallest mistakes.
She became stronger than she ever thought she would be. They dueled fiercely for hours sometimes, and sometimes with no mistakes on her part. Her special moves began to become defined, they became techniques for her to use at her own disposal. He approved with brief nods whenever she took a shot at going through with one. Normally they weren't successful attempts on him, since he had seen them all before, but he had told her never to be discouraged because her enemies would not have a clue to deflect them. They had no experience with such intricate moves. This piece of information from him only succeeded in making her work even harder.
She was going to that war, and she was going to fight with him until she breathed her last breath of the blood-filled air.
Asch was Asch – for the most part, she decide. He seemed at peace and disturbed at the same time. Sometimes he would give her hugs with no warning, or seemingly for no reason at all. Sin didn't mind though, those hugs made her stronger, even more sure of what she had to do. He seemed to open up a little over the days too, as they lay awake during the night, he would tell her stories about Auldrant and about Luke. He spoke to her about the life he had spent with Van and the life Luke had accidentally taken from him. He attempted to describe all his fellow God-Generals that had 'aided' him, but because she kept referring to them as 'his friends' he had stopped quickly enough while rolling his eyes in darkness. She had given him a wry smile, while trying to be helpful and state that friends could possibly choose to aim guns at him when they were mad. Legretta, was that her name?
It always intrigued her when he spoke of these things and she stayed awake as long as she could, nodding carefully and drawing designs on his chest as she listened. He seemed to realize she liked the stories, for there seemed to be new ones every night for her to swallow and digest. Usually the late night conversations would end with a question from her, when she could never manage to hear the answer before sleep surrounded her.
It became routine the next morning for her to ask him again for the answer. He always just shook his head with a tiny smile on though, saying that she would have to wait until later that night to hear it. She liked it this way; it always started off the conversation for the next time.
The war was coming, she knew, but for some reason, Asch would never give her a specific day. Always he would just reply quietly 'soon, soon' before turning away and going back to the task that was at hand. It bothered her a little, but she learned to assume that he just did that because he didn't want her to worry until the time was actually upon them. She focused solely on her training and tried to refrain from thinking about what an actual war would be like. Even in the few hours when Asch wasn't with her, while she was in their room, she practiced movement and precision, she trained with Kotone too. It seemed like her weapons became a part of her, each day, every day. They contained her soul; they had to, because Asch was the one who held her heart, her love. She woke up every morning, her ember eyes eager and focused on anything that would come to her that day, ready to accept, ready to defeat.
She never expected to wake up and find Asch not there.
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Something was wrong, she realized as she opened her eyes a sliver. Somehow the weight of the bed was different; she wasn't sliding down at all. Where was the weight that had always been on the other side, pulling her closer? Where was the comforting presence that always circled her waist at night, shielding her from nightmares?
There was no breathing coming from behind her, no gentle breeze brushing her neck from every exhale. There was no movement, no shifting whatsoever.
Nothing.
"Asch?" she asked quietly to the wall.
Nothing.
Her eyes widening slowly, she turned over to look at the other side of the bed.
Nothing.
Sin furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. He was always there.
"Asch?" she called again uncertainly while looking around the room. He wasn't on the couch or at the small wooden table in the corner either. The room was empty, completely empty.
The replica pushed herself to her hands and knees and crawled across the bed. It felt so weird, normally when she got up early she had to first detangle herself from his arms and then step carefully over him.
'Where are you?' she wondered, trying to swallow her ever increasing frustration.
She looked out the window, it was barely dawn, they sky covered in clouds telling her that it would be one of those grey days. Why would he leave this early?
Thinking back as she dressed, she tried to remember if she had missed him mentioning anything about this from the night previous. Nothing came to her though and she immediately felt panicky. That's it, where was he?
She was out the door as fast as her legs would take her.
"Training?" she huffed first as she ran. That was weird; normally he would drag her out of bed if he had to, to train.
'Maybe he wanted me to get some rest?' she wondered after a good few minutes of running. The door to the training room urged her to open and look in. She did so obediently.
"Asch?" Sin called, but the only answer was her own voice echoing off the walls in the early morning, digging into every crack but not revealing his whereabouts.
She slumped, her hand holding her up against the door frame.
Panic lashed at her harder now, making her orange eyes squeeze shut in concentration.
'Come on! Think! Think! What did he say?'
Once again she drew a blank though.
"Ugh!" she growled as she pushed away from the door and began her run again.
Her feet were completely silent as she pushed herself down the halls, glancing down every doorway, but no Asch slipped into her sights.
That's when she noticed it though, it was so silent.
She slowed to a walk. "Hello!?" she called.
No one answered. No one even popped their head out to shush her.
"What the…" Sin whispered, confused. It was completely deserted.
Her eyes locked on the floor, disheartened but not even close to being defeated.
Maybe it wasn't what he had said…maybe it was what he hadn't said.
'Don't tell me…'
She looked out the window to her left.
An army spread across her vision. Asch's army.
Eyes widened now, she leaned out into the cold air, scanning for him.
His blood red hair caught her attention almost immediately, even among the thousands of soldiers that were lined up around him.
'What are you doing?' she accused. 'What are thinking?'
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"Asch!" Sin yelled as loud as she could once she made it outside and to the field. Leaving the window had been almost terrifying in a way, it felt like once she left to head outside, once she got there, he would be gone.
But to her relief, the whole army was still there waiting.
Soldiers parted for her with sad expressions. She gave them odd looks while shaking her head. It seemed like they were purposely ordered to let her through.
She was almost beside him now. "Asch."
The crimson haired God-General turned around on the grey horse, his deep green eyes instantly locked on her and hardened considerably, much to her confusion. He didn't speak.
"Hey what's going on?" she asked, looking around. The soldiers were waiting patiently.
Still he didn't speak. She turned her gaze back to him
"Why didn't you wake me? Why didn't you tell me this was happening today?"
He voiced no answer.
"Asch?" she asked quietly while going closer to him. "Say something."
He didn't.
Sin walked right up to his horse's side, her bangs falling out of her eyes as she looked up at him. He looked down at her with that cold expression from before; she had no idea where it was coming from. His eyes voiced their own answer; she grasped to get her head around it.
Suddenly, she understood what the long silence was for. He didn't need to say anything because the answer was all around her.
'No…it can't be…'
Her ember eyes widened as she gazed hard at him, her head shaking frantically. He nodded carefully down at her.
"N-no…please no…"
He turned his head away just slightly, but kept his piercing green eyes locked with hers.
"You were…y-you were leaving! I can't…I'm such an idiot…"
It was too much to comprehend; her mind ran laps tiredly, trying to collect all the information, all the realizations.
His voice stabbed her. "You don't have to fight anymore, Sin."
She blinked repeatedly as the tears threatened to leak over. "W-what? No I-"
"-I wanted to say goodbye…" he said, the hard expression on his face instantly melting into a gentle one.
"G-goodbye?" What did that mean?
"Yes."
'No…'
"I don't u-understand…why- the training? Why would you-"
"So you could let go."
'Let go…of the war?'
"No!" she yelled, "You're l-lying! You have to be!"
"I meant every word when I said you were strong, and I meant every word when I said you weren't coming. I never changed my mind."
Her hands grasped at him as the tears finally fell from her eyes. "I'm going with you!"
His voice was soft. "I'm sorry…you're staying…"
"No! I won't!" she yelled with a breaking voice.
"Where it's safe…"
"I'll never stay!"
He reached down and grabbed her, pulling her up and into a crushing hug. She cried into his hair only for a moment before she went on a rampaging struggle, knowing he meant this as a goodbye. He held her tightly though, calmly, as he lowered his head to her ear.
"I love you…" he said in that soft voice, before he brushed his lips gently across her cheek. It was so quick that no one saw it; they saw only a departing hug between friends.
Her tears fell harder. "You're going to hell!" she yelled, trying with all her might to get on the horse with him. He made sure she didn't.
"Why are you doing this!? I can help you!"
"It will never be enough…"
"W-what!"
"I have to know you're safe."
"You can't stop me from following!"
"Actually…I can."
His strength overpowered her instantly, pushing her down, away from him. His soft demeanor turned ice cold and rock solid. She couldn't break through.
Sin struggled, trying to get back up but it was more than just a shock when his foot slammed into her collarbone, near her left shoulder, sending her falling backward.
The replica shook it off. "Hah, you'll have to do better then that!" she growled at him with a glare while getting back to her feet.
The God-General extended a hand toward her, like he was reaching for her touch.
An intense icy pain exploded from her neck, sending her crashing mindlessly to her knees. Her hand tried to come up and touch it, sooth it somehow, but she couldn't move. It was as if all her muscles were contracting, locking her in an intense struggle for freedom. Her eyes closed as the electric pulses kept her pinned down, helplessly.
'Why can't I move!?' she shuddered as the restraints kept her in check. Each time she tried to resist, a drilling shock got sent from her neck, down her spine to her limbs. Even blinking was hard to do.
Against the shocks of protest, she placed her hand on the ground tried to struggle back to her knees, where she could see him. She couldn't do it though, she could fight through the pain but not through the tension in her muscles, they wouldn't move any further.
"Stop moving." She barely heard Asch command her.
Then she remembered that he had done this, it hadn't occurred by itself.
'How…?' she asked wearily as sweat poured down her face and her hair stuck to her pale skin.
But through the dizziness she retained her thoughts and the realization that all the constrictions seems to be coming from her neck.
Wait…no. He couldn't have…
"Traitor! You used it!" Sin screamed, "You promised! You promised!"
Lightening seared her body from her shouts, but she didn't dare pull away from what he had just done, she gripped the guilty part of him in her thoughts, wrestling, fighting to keep the love for him away, to not forgive, so she wouldn't forget.
His broken promise.
Her eyes slammed shut.
'You used the mark! How could you!'
His voice was disappearing slowly the next time he spoke. "Don't ask for you weapons, unless you're on your death bed. I don't know when I'll come back, but don't you dare come looking for me."
His voice was fading, but the next one was close.
"General Asch, what should we do?"
"Take her to her room… she'll be out-cold soon."
'No…come back…'
"I know you can still hear me. This is goodbye, Sin'kara."
'Goodbye…'
...
Her eyes didn't see anything as she stared out the window, her hand holding her chin up, forcing herself to gaze uselessly out the window beside the bed she was in. She was in her old room, and it was lonelier then before.
Her heart didn't slow down. She cried for hours when she woke up, first from joy that it had all been a dream and then pain when she realized her reality had turned into a nightmare.
He was gone. He had left her behind.
--
So lately,
Been wondering,
Who will be there to take my place?
When I'm gone
You'll need love
To light the shadows on your face.
If the great wave shall fall
It would fall upon us all
And between the sand and stone
Could you make it on you own?
--
She didn't dare try to sort her problems out now; it would probably result in a mental breakdown. But why had he done that? He had tricked her into thinking that if she trained as hard as she could, she would be allowed to go with him to the war.
Sin broke down into a sigh of despair. Those past days had been some of the more memorable too, but that realization only succeeded in making her heart ache more. Why did she have to be so blind all the time? He had been working so hard to keep her happy, to tell her all about himself and more while the time of doom approached ever closer every day.
"I'm so stupid," she hung her head, "If only I had paid attention…"
--
If I could,
Then I would.
I'll go wherever you will go
Way up high,
Or down low,
I'll go wherever you will go.
And maybe…
I'll find out
A way to make it back someday
To watch you,
To guide you,
Through the darkest of your days.
If the great wave shall fall
Yeah and fall upon us all,
Well then I hope there is someone out there who
Can bring me back to you.
--
Alone again in the world, the replica slipped from the bed and her bare feet led her to the door. She couldn't stay here, it wasn't her room anymore.
Her trembling hand closed around the door handle weakly, and because she was shaking so much, her first attempt to get the door open ended in failure.
Sin pressed her sweating forehead to the door and closed her eyes, feeling defeated, like her purpose of living had rejected her. She didn't want to think about him…but…holding onto him was they only thing that kept her standing. Even if it was the angry part of her that thrashed at the thought of what he had done, that was enough. Her love wasn't buried far beneath it.
She gripped the door handle, thinking back.
"Asch?"
He turned around.
"Can you leave the door unlocked?"
His expression was a little confused. "It's always been unlocked…"
Sin turned her hand, her forehead still pressed against the door. It clicked and creaked open.
The replica let a broken smile onto her face. And so he was right again.
--
If I could,
Then I would.
I'll go wherever you will go.
Way up high,
Or down low,
I'll go wherever you will go.
Run away with my heart,
Run away with my hopes,
Run away with my love.
I know now,
It's quiet out.
My life and love might still go on
In your heart,
In your mind,
I'll stay with you
For
All
Of
Time.
--
Sin wandered aimlessly into the hallway and turned in the direction of their room. She kept her blank gaze on the floor, knowing she wouldn't be able to bear seeing anyone but him right now. But he wasn't here.
'Why am I here?'
He was worried about her safety.
'Am I not worried about his?'
She was powerless to stop him.
'When will he be coming back?'
When the war was over.
'Will he come back?'
If the war ended in victory.
Sin collided with something as she walked in a daze. Her eyes searched uncertainly for the thing she had hit, landing on a young maid as the girl stumbled.
"Uff!" the figure winced as she landed on her bottom, the towels she had been carrying landed in heaps around her.
Sin blinked slowly down at the girl, wondering if that had been what she hit.
"Oh! I'm so sorry!" the girl explained hastily while scrambling to pick up the towels, "I didn't see you there…so many towels, you know…" she laughed nervously as she stood up with the cloth in her arms again.
Sin furrowed her eyebrows but said nothing as the girl stood in front of her, waiting to be forgiven or perhaps an apology from her too.
After a moment, the girl tilted her head. "Are you alright?"
The replica jerked and blinked repeatedly. Was there still kindness in this world?
--
If I could turn back time
(I'll go wherever you will go)
If I could make you mine
(I'll go wherever you will go)
I'll go wherever you will go.
--
She blinked back tears and stared at the floor. The tears felt anyway and she felt ashamed for showing such weakness in front of a complete stranger.
'No…no I'm not alright! I'm the furthest thing from it!'
Sin covered her face and slumped to her knees, right in the middle of the hall, but she didn't care. The tears slipped around her fingers and dropped with small splashed upon the shiny floor.
The maids voice was comforting, not pitying. "There, there, it will be just fine, you'll see."
Sin felt a gentle hand on her back but shook her head, her voice choked.
"No…h-he broke his promise…I-it wasn't fair…"
"Sometimes breaking promises keeps the ones we love safe, hmm?"
'Yes…he knew that too…'
"N-no I cant…I just…"
"Yes you can." Her voice said soothingly.
"No…he's gone!"
"He will be back. Have faith."
'Faith…'
Asch came up behind her and placed another rock in her hand. When she grasped it, he placed his hand over hers.
"No one gets it on the first try…" he stated while pulling her arm back so they could throw the next one together. Sin glanced at him from the corner of her eye. His face looked at ease right now; there was no swirling uneasiness in the back of his eyes.
She turned back to the water. "I bet you did."
"I can't do everything; your faith in me fluctuates too much," he said in a low tone.
"What do you mean?" They flicked the rock out onto the surface. It bounced only a few times in succession before it descended under the water. Asch bent down, got another rock and placed it in her hand. They started again.
"I mean that your faith in me is either too much or too little. Never in between."
"I have more faith in you than anyone else." Sin stated as they threw the next rock.
"Yeah…I have…faith in him. He'll come home." She whispered, closing her eyes.
She didn't see the action but she sensed it as the maid nodded down to her.
"That's right! Master Asch is strong, he will come home no matter what!"
'She knew who I meant all along...'
"Yes. Thank you."
Suddenly something was pushed into her line of sight and she blinked at it. It was a towel.
The maid spoke up. "I just finished tidying up his room and I was going to clean this but I thought maybe you might want it?"
Sin felt her mouth actually curve into a decent smile. Wow this girl was like an angel in her darkest nightmares. She nodded and took the towel, bringing it close to her face.
"Smells like him doesn't it?"
A prickling blush shot across Sin's face, but she couldn't help but nod.
'Exactly like you Asch…'
The maid pulled her firmly to her feet with a full blown smile. "Make sure you hide it well though, or the other maids will take it by accident."
"Alright…"
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Sin lay awake that night, going carefully over her thoughts. Things needed to be sorted and rearranged – prioritized properly. She had new decisions to make, like what her purpose was now and whether staying in the palace without Asch was right.
Should she go out looking for him, and cast aside all the dangers he had worked so hard to prevent from coming to her? Would that be selfish?
Yes, because it's what she wanted to do.
No, because she swore she'd give her life to protect him, just as he was doing for her.
How would staying here help anything anyway? And what if he never came back? How would she ever live that down –scratch that – how would she ever live?
If he had had full faith in her though, he would have allowed her to go along with him. But he didn't have that kind of insane trust that she had for him, and because of that it brought him down to a more protective level of concern.
'How do I change that?' she wondered while furrowing her eyebrows in the darkness of their room, 'How do I receive that complete trust from him?'
The only answers she got were: Disobey, get stronger, go to war, and prove it.
Sin closed her eyes tiredly as she turned over on the new pillowcase she had just received from an angel.
It smelled like him.
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Well there you have it finally, hope you enjoyed it. I feel so guilty lol, I'm so mean to her…and Asch was really mean at the end of the chapter too ahaha. I hope its not a Mary-Sue though…isn't that when an Oc's gets everything they want? I have no idea.
PLEASE review. Even if it's just 'good' or 'bad' or 'banana' XP REVIEW!
Kazink