}~{ Gild the Lily }~{
Everything you know about the Elders, about the Gou'ald coming to Luxima, about what they were there for; it was all a lie.
Follow the thread. I know you've had a lot of questions over the years, Rosie. More than you have let on or told Jack and I. The biggest being these I think:
What happened to your parents?
Was Roderick really your father?
What happened in your childhood?
Why can't you remember anything before age 11?
Why there seems to be a bigger stigma around you than just being too "inexperienced" to be an Elder?
I can't answer everything because there was just too little information and so many people didn't have answers. However, I think that everything leads back to the Elders from the last Council in some way or another. They've done a good job at keeping secrets and covering their tracks through the years. It's not hard to see there's been a dark cloud hanging over the Elders for a long, long time. Stretching back to when the Gou'ald visited Luxima. Somehow the Gou'ald, the Elders and you are connected and I think I've figured out what it is.
They're all covering something up, Rose. Something that happened to you back when you were a child. You say that you can't remember. I think that was on purpose. I believe the Elders erased those memories to protect you and cover up whatever they were doing or letting the Gou'ald do.
At least two of them were looking out for you anyways and I say two because I think that both of you parents were Elders, Rosie. I know, I know… That's not allowed and it's a taboo, but there are too many coincidences that point to it. The Keeper, Eamon, even agrees with me. He said he suspected something of the sort for a long time, but never said anything to the others because they would have taken it out on you. He didn't find that was very fair, but I assume that there are those on the Council who feel otherwise.
I know you think you can't trust anyone on Luxima, but I don't think that's true. There are some, working in the back ground, who do have your best interests at heart and are on your side. Avia, Eamon, even Uinseann, though I know you don't trust him.
Anyways, the biggest question of your father. I think I've figured out who he is thanks to Eamon. During the last twenty years there have been nine men serving on the Council; two High Elders, one Keeper, two Seekers, one Judge, and three Arms. It very well could be any of them, but I narrowed it down to those who were serving at the same time as your mother. Which leaves Eamon, Miach, Torrin, and Uinseann.
I told you I have a feeling I know which it is, but I think you do too. I think you've known it for quite some time, but just wouldn't allow yourself to believe it. I'm not sure you would fully believe me either if I just told you outright. I want you to finish reading all of this because it's going to become clear. Everything is going to become clear. Just know, for now at least, you're father never left you or your mother behind. He never died in battle or fled in the middle of the night.
I think a good place to start is with a little history. Your planet is very old, as you already knew, but while it resembles other planets there's something quite different. The climates in different sections are off, deserts where there should be arctic tundra for one, and no matter where you go you have an overwhelming sense you are being watched.
Your people have stories for all of this. Those like Gaenor, the phantoms you see in the forest at night, creatures in the north and south with large claws. Stories come from somewhere. You see them for what they are. I've learned that most of your people, however, do not. They think they're all just that; stories. They have never seen an Alma. They have never seen a phantom or one of the large creatures to the north with black and white stripes.
Somehow you have though. Somehow you are able to interact with it all on another plane. Kind of like of Oma except you're still living. You can sense when something isn't right in the world. I've seen it. Your long dazes into space, maybe you've never really noticed or just simply shrugged it off, but you feel something; you know something even if it isn't clear to you. That's why Gaenor found you in The Forest.
There are things much older on that planet than you and your people or even the Gou'ald. I think your parents knew that too. I think your connection to whatever this is, magic or life-force or whatever, is why the Elders erased your memories. But there's something else too. It has been bothering me for a long time. Ever since Jack and I stepped foot on the planet.
There is no trace of Gou'ald interaction in any piece of literature, any document, and no one can seem to recall the last day specifically when the Gou'ald left for good. They all remember Lucretia, the famed woman who led your people out of slavery from the Gou'ald, but they can't remember the name of the Gou'ald she fought.
Another thing is, what were the Gou'ald doing on your planet to begin with? This ties in with how there is something about your planet that just isn't right and I say "isn't right" because I don't know how else to describe it. I believe it's magic of some form, but not like in the movies you've seen here on Earth. I mean real magic that the planet provides and only a select few have the ability to wield. I tore the library and the Records apart searching for some kind of hard proof. I found it. Mysticus. It's what your people used to describe as magic, Rose. More often than not it was used long ago to define those who had abilities to communicate with spirits, interact with the dead, and feel things that were unnatural, even use unnatural means to combat them. They had power, real power, and sometimes it ended badly. Very badly.
I think the Elders were afraid of you and what you might be. They had seen a Necromancer before in Lucretia. Some of the records described her as a force to be reckoned with and able to raise the dead on a whim, using them as puppets. That's how she won the war with the Gou'ald. However, what happened after is a bit more sinister. She was "claimed" by the darkness and it became "necessary to put an end to her wrong doings." The document was all but destroyed in the basement of the Records. The Elders, once the Council was created, deemed Lucretia was "too powerful" and "unpredictable" and so they felt the need to stop her. It took the whole Council to stop her before she destroyed the White City. She was hell bent on seeing it burn to the ground. She claimed that it was built on top of a henge of sorts that her people, your people, had drawn their powers from.
Lucretia maybe your ancestor according to the records, but your abilities are quite different though. You can't control the dead, but you can speak to them. According to Eamon, that was how Lucretia had begun as a child. It's the first step to being seduced by the darkness. I think this "Mysticus" is why the Gou'ald first appeared on your planet. They probably observed someone centuries ago using magic and saw that it was a raw power that never depleted or waned. They probably wanted to harness the power so they could somehow find a way to use it. When they figured out they couldn't just collect magic like they had Naquadria and Naquadah they decided to use the people who could wield it instead.
Looking deeper through everything there is this overwhelming sense of light and dark on Luxima. In some of the literary works I stumbled upon, some people alleged that there had been Mysticus wielders who served on both sides; Luxima and the Gou'ald, but that they had died out long ago. I don't think that's true. I think they may have gone into hiding. Perhaps they thought that if they "disappeared" then the Gou'ald wouldn't have a reason to return.
Not all who used Mysticus were "dark." Actually, there were more who had practiced Animancy, usually referred to these people as Conjurer, more so than the Black Arts. A phrase continued to pop up stating, "Everything has a price." I think they were talking about the Conjurer who turned dark. Using their powers for so long for such a horrible war took its toll on them, on Lucretia. This Animancy was the "light" side of Mysticus. It roughly means "the breath of life." It was to give life to something or give a soul, but not in the same way as bringing the dead back to life. So hence the nickname Conjurer. It was more like force wielding; psychokinesis, pyrokinesis, hydrokinesis, geokenisis, etc. It's actually quite interesting, but I'm sure you just want the facts so you can answer your questions.
Between you and Lucretia there was a long line of women in your family, leading all the way down to you and your mother. There has always been someone in your line sitting on the Council. Always. I don't know if the other Elders made sure there was a Levana holding a seat or if it was your family's "duty" and they made sure or even if anyone realized this was happening, but there's always been someone.
Now seeing as Lucretia had wielded magic it would make sense that her abilities flowed down through the line. The fact that you are able to communicate with Gaenor, even the fact that you could see her spirit when you first met her, means you have some of that power. However, trying to find a written accord of your mother having power was near impossible. It's almost like she didn't exist altogether. Other than the "Letter of Declaration for the Seizure of Celyna Valara Levana" there isn't much else to prove she existed passed your eleventh birthday. No grave, no paper trail, no one seems to know where she went. She hadn't been seized by the Imperial Soldiers. By that time she was already in the wind.
Your mother had grown up outside the White City. I think Avia already told you that though. She was from a small village to the north nestled near the Araceli Mountains. I wasn't able to go there myself without Jack figuring out what I was doing, but Eamon told me that the village was gone. It had been destroyed during the Great War for Freedom.
When I asked him how he knew this, he said it had been his home as well. Your mother and he had grown up in the same village, but had come to the city at different times. He also said that there was a third who had come from there, but he refused to say who. I believe this to be your father. Well, anyways, your mother came to the city when she was about eighteen. She became a Bellona and then by sheer force she fought her way into taking her place on the Council. She became the Healer, but you know all this. Now I know it's a bit of a stretch, but I think your mother used her powers as a Healer. There were some recordings of times she had saved people on the verge of death with just a gentle caress of her hand.
According to most, your mother had come into the Council being very much like you. Happy-go-lucky, eager and then one day she became very reserved; no friends, no family, kept to herself. That kind of behavior always breeds rumors and at the time people wondered if there was something wrong with your mother. Mentally. They hadn't suspected anything more yet. It wasn't until she became pregnant that they questioned things. They had never seen her with any man. She was very content with being alone and to all of a sudden appear one day pregnant was odd to say the least. The Elders questioned her on who the father was, but for the longest time she refused to give up a name. She finally did when they threatened to remove her from Council, imprison her and place the baby for adoption once it was born.
After that people began to spot her with Roderick Miren, an Imperial Soldier, and they just assumed that he was no doubt the unnamed father of her child. However, I think differently. I believe Roderick was just a scapegoat, whether he knew it or not, perhaps under a charm or something, was a different story. Despite my attempts, Eamon just wouldn't give me a name for the third person to have come from your mother's village. That's your father and because no one would name him that means he was somebody important. The only ones that important are the Elders because of it being such a taboo. I think it's safe to rule Eamon out, just so we're clear.
Your mother and Roderick never married. It was strange, but not uncommon for your people to do that. A few years after you were born he died in battle and your mother went back to being a recluse with you at her side. More and more though she began to "wither" as Eamon called it. She grew too quiet, stared at nothing for hours, couldn't eat, couldn't sleep. He often found your mother standing in the garden with you in her arms, just staring out at the sky with a blank stare. On some occasions he would spot Uinseann questioning your mother on her behavior and how she was handling you. He seemed very concerned for your well-being.
Eamon made it clear that your mother never hurt you or neglected you, but that people questioned her ability to mother you in her state. They chalked it up at first to grief of Roderick and then when you came of age for schooling they began to see other changes. Your mother became less quiet. She became defiant and unruly. She argued with the Council constantly and held a grudge against your teacher, Sabine, over reforms. What reforms is a mystery though. It was listed in the records as reforms to protect orphaned children in the city, but there was so little in the way of movement with those reforms that I think they fought over something else. Something the Elders, or maybe just Sabine and your mother, didn't want the public knowing.
I talked with some of the other Elders and they told me that your mother would disappear for days at a time. Randomly too. Sometimes in the middle of a meeting she would just stand and leave without so much as excusing herself, that she would come to one of their doors and leave you in one of their care. It soon arose that someone was accusing your mother of leaving the White City to practice the Black Arts like your ancestor had. They claimed to have spotted her by a waterfall chanting and making the water boil. Her accuser was Sabine, of course. I believe it might have been out of spite. I think your mother was meddling in her work, whatever it was, and she wanted it to stop. Best way would be to get your mother out of the picture.
Uinseann said that at your mother's hearing she never once denied the allegations, but instead explained that she had been looking into a series of disappearing children from the surrounding villages. She accused Sabine of using the children in some kind of science experiment. She had found out that children had been taken from the villages under Sabine's orders and vanished. They never came back and no one ever saw them again. Sabine again accused your mother of Necromancy and the Black Arts in retaliation. Your mother, overcome with anger, apparently shattered the Conclave windows without so much as raising a hand and her eyes seemed to glow. That only helped in Sabine's case because your mother was labeled as a Necromancer like Lucretia. She was imprisoned and you fell under the care of Uinseann for a short while.
After about a year, you disappeared mysteriously under Sabine's watch one day. You had gone to class with other children and you were all gone before night fell. When Uinseann told your mother she, as he described, "broke her chains in a surge of embers that she emitted from her hands." At that point, it was clear she was a Conjurer if nothing more. She went off after Sabine and then never came back, but you did. Uinseann and you came back, but neither of you could say where your mother had gone.
Soon after that you were sent to live in an orphanage. Then Avia found you and you went to live with her. After your mother's disappearance and Sabine's death a cloud hovered over the Elders and Council. The people began to distrust the government they had chosen to represent them. There were too many secrets and strange things were happening, children had gone missing, now not one but two Elders were missing. They have had a hard time overcoming everything.
No one has heard from your mother since or seen her. She just vanished that day. I don't think the Elders have bothered to search for her either. What happened between you, Sabine and your mother is a mystery. The only person who would know besides you is Uinseann. He was there at every point and even afterwards. I believe searching for your mother would fall under Uinseann's authority, wouldn't it? If he declared a country wide search, the people would have to or vice-versa. So why hadn't he ordered one? Was he trying to help her because she had been right? Or was there more?
That made me curious. He has been this shadowed figure in your life for a long while. So, I dug. I found out that he was the one who told Avia where you were and asked her to adopt you. He signed the paperwork affirming it. He was the one who got you into the Academy when you decided you wanted to be a Bellona like your mother. He was even the final, decisive vote that got you onto the Council at such a young age. Uinseann has always been there with you and your mom… He was the third person from that same small village to the north. They both sat on Council at the same time. He has always seemed very interested in your life and has always seemed to make it a point of showing up when you were either getting into trouble or when you were being praised. I don't have any other proof that he is your father, but Rosie, if I feel that this is him, then you must.
I'm sorry that I don't have more to give you. The Elders have kept everything very hush-hush and most of the documentation has been destroyed over the years. I don't know who wiped your memory. Perhaps your mother or another Elder? Maybe even whatever had happened that day? I don't know what exactly happened between your mother and Sabine or what Sabine was doing. It couldn't have been good though. I also don't know for sure what role the Gou'ald had to play in it all either. I do think they had come to your planet in search of harnessing the magic there, but that's all I can attest to.
There's a stigma around you being an Elder because of your mother's tarnished reputation of dabbling in Black Arts and whatever went on with Sabine. She took you somewhere and something must have happened. I just don't know what. I do know that the Stargate was moved from its original place to the White City in the West Wing after it all. I would assume then that Sabine was using the Stargate somehow. Maybe she was taking the children to another planet or someone was visiting Luxima. Maybe it was a Gou'ald, maybe it wasn't.
I wish I could have helped more. All the documents I could find are here in the journal. You need to talk to Uinseann. He must have some answers and I think you need to hear from him what you already know. I also think you should take a visit to the Araceli Mountains and see the village where your parents came from. Maybe there is something left behind that might help. Who knows? I would also track down the original place of the Stargate and find out why it was moved.
Jack and I are here to help if you need it, Rosie. Don't be afraid to ask. Teal'c and Sam would jump at the chance to help too. You have friends here who care about you. You're not alone. So don't think you are.
– Daniel