Author's Note: I can't apologize enough for the delay in this chapter, especially given what it turned out to be. I'm not thrilled with this chapter, in case you couldn't tell, but I need it to push forward. If you're on my Facebook account, you know how much I struggled with this chapter. I hope you forgive me!

Sspecial thanks to Flames101 (I'm so glad you like Anna!), canny-bairn (please forgive me – you'll know why), Pheonix1995, Daisyangel, ChocoboMuffins (thank you!), Nic-Brooke, sweber22, jltmysterylover, nebula2, spk, deeda (all my stuff is eventually happy), whimisical-one-ga, Cmfandoodle, and Leggomygreggo21 (I'm glad you like it!) for the reviews.

Additional Author's Note: Corrected a few typos - thanks, nebula2! Also, as a side note, Lauren was mentioned in the previous two chapters as a girl that was Reid had started to see. Had a couple of requests to see her so I though I'd bring her aboard.

Of Bad Dreams and Worse Decisions

"What you do you say we make some tea and talk once we get these guys to bed?" JJ asked, Hotch as they finally made it through the front door. It was clear that someone had come by and straightened up the house while they were gone. JJ made a mental not to find and thank that person.

Hotch sighed. "Sure."

He shifted a sleeping Jack in his arms. Jack had fallen asleep before they pulled out of the parking lot. Henry never stirred as they transferred him from the chair to Hotch's arms to the car and now to JJ. JJ lead them upstairs. She tucked Henry into bed with a kiss to the forehead while Hotch waited for her in the doorway. They moved to Jack's room, taking off his jacket and shoes before putting him under the covers. Hotch kissed him good night before moving to allow JJ to do the same.

"Mommy!" Jack shrieked as JJ pulled away from him. He flung his arms around her neck, clawing wildly at her back as he tried to climb onto her, half-asleep. "No! No-no!"

"Jack!" JJ said, firmly, trying to break through his dream. She fully pulled him into her arms and sat on the bed. JJ rocked him back and forth, gently, rubbing his back while he cried. She looked up at Hotch for help, but he just looked lost. "Jack, it's okay. I'm right here." She waited until his sobs had calmed before continuing, "Can you tell me what scared you?"

Jack laid his head on JJ's shoulder and nodded. "I had a bad dream and I couldn't find you. I saw Anna on the floor. I think she was dead."

"Oh, Jack," JJ whispered, her heart breaking. "Anna's fine. She just has to spend the night in the hospital to get some rest. And guess what? She's going to stay with Uncle Dave for a little while."

"Why?" Jack asked, softly.

JJ pulled him in closer. "Because she's not feeling very well right now and she needs somebody take care of her right now."

"Uncle Dave can take care of her?"

"Yep."

Jack pulled his head away to look at JJ. "If Uncle Dave's taking care of Anna, who's going to take care of me and Henry when you and Daddy go away?"

JJ kissed his forehead. "We'll figure something out."

"Can I sleep with you," Jack turned in JJ's lap to look at Hotch, "and Daddy?"

"Of course," Hotch answered, finally speaking.

JJ squinted at him, surprised by his answer. Hotch shrugged, but offered no other answer. "Um, why don't you let Daddy help you get some pjs on and meet me in his room? I want to check on Henry and get changed."

"Okay." Jack hopped down from JJ and ran to his dresser to grab his pajamas. He waited until JJ left the room before speaking to his dad. "Daddy, can we have a ser'us convo'ation?"

"A serious conversation?" Hotch corrected, helping Jack out of his shirt. Jack nodded. "What do you want to talk about?"

Jack scrunched his face. "I wanna talk about my birthday wish. Anna said I needed to talk to you. She said my wish needed help."

"What's your wish, Jack?" Hotch peered at him, trying to think what he possibly could have wished for that would require such a conversation.

Jack took a deep breath. "I want to call JJ 'Mom.'" He took another breath. "Henry gets to call you 'Daddy' and JJ's just like my mom and Anna doesn't think Mommy would be mad because JJ loves me just like Mommy did."

"Henry calls me 'Daddy' because you call me 'Daddy' and Henry wants to do everything that you do," Hotch explained. He frowned when Jack continued to stare at him. "This is kind of a big decision, Jack. I mean, it would be one thing if JJ and I were married..."

"Marry JJ!" Jack said, excitedly.

Hotch sighed, not realizing he had said that last part aloud. "Jack, why don't you take a few days to think about this?"

Jack pouted. "I have been thinking about it. I been thinking about it for a long time."

"Jack!" Hotch said, sharply. He instantly regretted his tone when he saw the hurt in Jack's eyes. "Let's just save this conversation for another day, okay? A lot's happened today and it's time for bed."

Jack nodded, staring at his feet.

"Hey," JJ called out, softly, "what's going on in here? You guys are taking forever."

"Can you finish getting him ready for bed?" Hotch asked, brushing past her.

JJ nodded, watching him curiously as he left the room. She grabbed Jack's pajamas from the dresser and helped him get into them. Jack was subdued the entire time, leaving JJ dark over what had occurred while she was gone.

"JJ?" Jack whispered as he snuggled in close to her in Hotch's bed. Hotch had yet to return. "Are you going to stay here forever?"

"I..." JJ's voice trailed off. "You know I love you, right?" Jack nodded against her chest. "There is nothing that could ever happen to make me stop." She paused. "Anna's not gone forever, you know. She's just gone for a little while."

Jack's only response was a light snore. JJ tried to wait up for Hotch, but soon found the siren song of sleep too strong to resist.

She awoken the next morning with Jack curled into her side and Henry staring at her beside the bed. She glanced over at the bed, but saw it was empty. She wasn't sure that Hotch had even made it to bed last night.

"Hey, little man," JJ said, turning her attention back to Henry. "What are you doing?"

Henry shrugged. "Hungry."

"Okay. Let Mama use the bathroom and I'll come make you some breakfast." When JJ returned, she found both Jack and Henry awake and looking at her. "Anyone know where your dad is?"

"Working," Henry replied.

JJ frowned. "In the basement?"

"Yep."

"JJ, can we have waffles?" Jack asked her. She nodded before leading them downstairs. She got them feed, dressed, and settled in the living room before getting herself dressed, giving Hotch some time to himself. It wasn't until after lunch was done that she finally ventured downstairs.

"Dave just called," JJ announced, walking into his office in the basement. Hotch was pouring over a stack of files. "He and Anna made it home. She hasn't said much, but he's gotten her eat a little."

"Hm," was all Hotch replied, not looking up.

JJ sighed. "Okay, that's enough."

She walked around to his side of the desk, taking the pen from his hand and closing the folder he was reviewing. She squeezed between him and the desk, sitting on top of it. Hotch sat up a little straighter, placing his hands on her denim-covered thighs. He looked at her expectantly.

"Well, clearly, you're not going to make this easy," JJ commented with a sarcastic bite. "Let's talk about Anna."

Hotch's fingers clenched her thighs. "What's there to talk about? I thought we were... close. I thought we were family. Family's suppose to help family. She doesn't want my help."

JJ ran her hands through his hair. "She's hurt right now. She's lost."

"Exactly!" he emphasized. "She used to come to me when she was in pain. Now, I have to turn her care over to Dave? I failed her. She's trusted me since she was eighteen years old and I let her down."

"You didn't let her down. You didn't fail her. Hey," she said, grabbing his face when he moved to look away. "Did you ever stop to think that the reason she pushes you away is that she knows that you'll always be there?"

Hotch released a long breath. "Maybe."

JJ frowned knowing from his tone that he didn't believe her at all. She also knew she wouldn't be able to push him any further on it now. She switched tactics. "So, you want to tell me what you and Jack were talking about last night that got you so upset?"

"It was nothing. It was a long day and I was tired. I didn't react the right way." He laid his cheek on her lap, surprising her by seeking comfort. JJ gently stroke his hair. "We have to figure out something to do with the boys."

"I can stay behind for awhile. As long as it's not a highly public case, you guys can make do without me."

Hotch moved his hands around her waist. "And if it ends up being a highly public case?"

"Maybe Garcia can help us out... or maybe I'll take some time off." She paused. "I'm going to take this week so we can figure out something with the boys and give them time to settle."

"Daddy? JJ?" Jack called from the top of the stairs. "The movie's over. Can we put on Cars 2? And make popcorn?"

JJ looked down at Hotch, who simply looked back her, not responding not Jack. "I'm coming!" JJ shouted back. She kissed Hotch's forehead before hurrying upstairs.

Rossi sat in his living room with just the table light on. He held a book in his hands, but he wasn't really reading it. He was waiting and listening. He suspected that Anna agreed to her sleeping pill and bedtime just a bit too easily. Rossi grinned to himself when he heard soft footsteps walking down the hall.

"Hello, Anna," Rossi called out when she passed.

Anna gasped at the sound of his voice. She shuffled into the living room, knowing she was busted. She stood in front of him, her shoulders hunched as she stared at her feet. "I couldn't sleep."

Rossi suppressed a sigh. "I thought you took a sleeping pill."

"I don't like them. They make me feel funny."

"Sit down," Rossi ordered, gently. He waited until she was on the other end of the couch before continuing to speak. "Are you ready to tell me what happened when you were kidnapped?"

Anna's eyes snapped to his. "What do you mean? Everything's in the report."

Rossi shook his head. "I know you. If everything that happened was in that report, you wouldn't be acting the way you've been acting. You wouldn't have landed in the hospital. What happened, Anna? Please tell me."

Tears welled up in Anna's eyes, but she didn't allow them to fall. "He... he was hired to kidnap us."

"Hired? By who?"

"My father," she whispered in a voice barely audible. She closed her eyes, wiping away the stray tear that fell. She heard Rossi inhale suddenly over her confession, but he otherwise remained silent. She was grateful for that. "We couldn't afford college... so I was looking into going to the community college for a few years and then transferring. My mother didn't like the idea. She had her heart set on me going to a four year college, you know? Something she had never been able to do. She went to my father and begged him for the money to send me to school."

Rossi cleared his throat. "I'm guessing he said no?"

Anna nodded. "When he told her no, she threatened to tell the press about how he had treated us the last ten years. He told her he would give her an answer in two weeks. He went out and hired... him... the next day to kidnap us and scare us."

"And then your grandmother got involved and your father wasn't able to pay him," Rossi reasoned. Inwardly, he was seething at Anna's father. Learning this must have completely thrown her world off it's axis and certainly explained the shell she'd become lately.

"I," the tears were falling freely from Anna's eyes now, "wasn't even worth a college education to a multimillionaire, I'm not worth much of anything."

"Don't say that. Why would you say that? Think that?"

Anna rolled her eyes. "Look at how many lives I've made worse: Hotch and JJ, Jack and Henry, Spencer and Derek, yours..."

Rossi reached over and grabbed her hands. "You haven't made anything in my life worse. If anything, you've brought laughter and joy into my life. And you helped Hotch, JJ, Jack, and Henry become a family."

"I terrified those little boys as if they didn't have enough trauma in their lives. And I saw Hotch's eyes. He's going to blame himself for my failures, just when he was forgiving himself for Haley. How did I make any of that better? And look what I did to Spencer! I forced him to be my friend, to be my brother, and then I shut him out cold. He has almost no family and I gave him that just to snatch it away. And Derek? I got him to fall in love with me just to turn my back on him." Anna hung her head. "How did I make anyone's life anything but miserable, Dave?"

"I think," Rossi told her slowly, "that you are in a very bad place right now and there's not much that I can say that you would believe right now. But I promise you, there's not a single person that you named that thinks their life is better without you. They're all fighting for you. It's all up to you to decide what you want."

Anna huffed. "What I want?"

"What do you want, Anna?" Rossi asked her, softly.

"I want to move away to where nobody knows who I am. I want to tuck the last thirty-one years in a box and never think about it again." She paused, wiping away her tears. "I want to disappear, but I can't do that to Jack and Henry."

"Oh, kiddo," Rossi breathed.

Anna licked her lips. "I want to never hear that tone again."

"Why don't we start with a hug?" Rossi held his arms open until Anna crawled into them. He cradled her close as he would a small child. "It's going to be okay. I promise that someday, it's going to be okay."

"Can you," Anna muttered against his clothed chest. "Can you ask Hotch and JJ if I can see the boys?"

Rossi nodded. "I'm sure we can go over there tomorrow."

"No, I'm not ready to see them. Just the boys. I need to let them know that I'm okay. They have to see it for themselves."

"Okay," Rossi agreed. He pulled her in close again. "I'll see what I can do."

Rossi rang the doorbell to Hotch and JJ's house the next afternoon. He was unsurprised when both Jack and Henry followed JJ to the front door.

"Hi, Dave," JJ greeted warmly. "Come inside."

Rossi leaned down to hug Jack and Henry before they scurried off to be replaced by a curious Hotch. He seemed to freeze slightly at seeing Rossi. Hotch cleared his throat. "Everything okay?"

"Everything's fine. I actually got Anna to eat half a bowl of pasta for lunch today. She's napping right now." Rossi's eyes flickered from Hotch to JJ. "I actually came to ask you both a question."

"What is it?" JJ asked him.

Rossi took a deep breath. "Anna would like to see the boys. She wants them to reassure them that she's okay. I think it would do her a lot of good, too. She's got a lot of guilt wrapped up in them."

Hotch looked to JJ. She waited for a few moments before realizing that he was leaving the decision up to her. "I think that's a good idea. It might help with Jack's nightmares."

"Jack's been having nightmares?" Rossi repeated.

JJ nodded. "They're to be expected after something like this. I'm not too worried. Both he and Henry have been really clingy, too." She stopped talking as Hotch excused himself to take a phone call.

"How's he doing?" Rossi asked JJ.

She shrugged. "He's not really talking to me. I mean, I know it's only be two days, but he feels distant, more distant than he has been in a long time."

Rossi squeezed her shoulder. "I'm sure he just needs a few days to process. What do you say I pick the boys up on Sunday to spend the afternoon with Anna? I'll stay with them the whole time."

"That would be great, Dave. Thank you."

"Oh, Anna has an idea for a baby-sitter, too, if you're up for suggestions," Rossi offered.

"Definitely. Let's go into the kitchen and eat some cake that Garcia dropped off. We can talk more."

Rossi eagerly followed her, excited for Anna, but also worried for Hotch. He hoped Hotch wasn't spiraling once again, but he had faith that JJ could handle anything thrown her way.

"Anna!" Henry called out a few days later. She whipped her head around from the mantel, where she had been staring, lost in thought, to see Rossi, Jack, and Henry standing in the doorway. Anna broke into a wide grin. She fell to her knees as Henry ran to her, enveloping each other in a giant hug.

"Oh, I missed you!" Anna told him, kissing the top of his head repeatedly. "I missed you!"

Henry looked up at her with complete adoration. "Missed you." He ran his tiny fingers over her cast. "You gots an owie."

"I do. That means you and Jack get to color all over this one, too. Uncle Dave even bought some stickers." Anna looked up to see Jack still standing next to Rossi, solemnly observing the scene. She raised her arm to him and he fell into her, sobbing.

"Can you take him?" Anna asked, quietly. She passed Henry off to him before wrapping her arms tightly around Jack. She turned them both until her back was against the couch, pulling him onto her lap. Anna rubbed circles over his back until he calmed down. "I'm so sorry, Jack. I never meant to scare you."

Jack laid his head on her shoulder. "I'm sorry, too. I should have protected you."

Anna closed her eyes briefly. "Jack, it is not your job to protect me. It is my job to protect you; you and Henry, and part of that is taking care of myself so I can take care of you. I was just... so sad about what happened to me that I forgot that. I won't forget it again. That's a promise."

"Does that mean you're coming home? Me and Henry miss you. I think Daddy misses you, too. JJ says he walks around in a maze."

"I think you mean a daze," Anna corrected, gently. "I need to stay with Uncle Dave for awhile."

Jack sighed. "What's going to happen when Daddy and JJ have to go back to work? Who's going to watch me and Henry?"

Anna looked over at Henry, who was watching them from Rossi's arms. Rossi was sitting the chair. "Do you remember Olivia? She was Zach and Tucker's nanny? Well, she is meeting with your mommy and daddy right now to work out the details about being your baby-sitter for awhile. You liked her, remember?"

"Yeah! She does the obstacle courses!" Jack said, excitedly. "And she does the plays!"

"The lion! Rawr!" Henry added, bouncing on Rossi's lap.

Anna smiled. "See, you'll have lots of fun. And Uncle Dave talked to your parents and you get to come here to spend a day with me every week."

"At Uncle Dave's house?" Jack asked, stretching his neck to look at Rossi.

Rossi chuckled. "That's right, slugger. And we can do anything you want. We can go swimming in the indoor pool. We can run around in the basement. We can go sledding riding on the hills when it snows."

"Can we do sock races in the hallway?" Jack pleaded.

Anna pursed her lips to cover up her smile. Rossi half-rolled his eyes at her. "Maybe... if we clear everything out of the hallway first. But suddenly, I'm pretty sure I know how the vase that JJ's mother sent got broken."

Anna, Jack, and Henry all glanced at each other before replying at the same time, "Oops."

"So, I understand that somebody is having their third birthday party soon. And I hear it's a Thomas the Tank Engine party," Rossi said.

"Me! Me!" Henry shouted. He turned on Rossi's lap and patted his check. "Unc' Dave coming?"

Rossi nodded. "You bet, sport. I wouldn't miss it."

Henry turned back around. "Anna coming?"

"Not this time," Anna said, sadly, "but we'll do something special, just us."

"Hey, what do you guys say we go make some sundaes?" Rossi asked before the conversation could turn sad again. He threw an arm around Anna as the followed the boys to the kitchen, reassuring her that things would be okay.

"It's about time you got here!" JJ teased, opening the door to find Reid standing there, looking sheepish. "I'm starting to get a complex. You're always late to these parties."

"Sorry," Reid apologized. "I-"

He was cut off when another person popped up beside him. She was cute, in her mid-twenties, with deep brown eyes and brown hair just cut under her chin. She smiled nervously. "It was my fault. I couldn't decide what to wear. I don't go to a lot of kids' parties, especially ones I don't know. And really what do you wear to meet the co-workers that your boyfriend considers family?" She took a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I'm rambling. I'm Lauren."

"JJ," JJ replied, shaking her hand, "and I think you look adorable. Come on in."

"Is, uh, is Anna here?" Reid asked as he and Lauren followed JJ inside.

JJ shook her head. "She told Dave that she wasn't quite ready to face us yet. But everyone else is here and they're looking forward to meeting the new girl in your life."

Reid grabbed Lauren's hand as they made their way into the living room. Most of the team was there as well as a few adults he didn't recognize, Jack, Henry, and half a dozen small children. Henry's train theme appeared on the walls, on the tables, in the food, and even on Henry himself as he was dressed as a conductor.

"Where's Hotch?" Reid asked JJ, noticing his absence from the room.

JJ sighed. "Hiding in the kitchen."

"Uncle Spence!" Jack yelped before leaping onto him. Reid struggled not to drop him. "You're here!"

"I am," Reid affirmed. "Jack, this is, uh, my friend, Lauren."

Lauren waved at him. "Hi Jack. It's very nice to meet you."

"You, too," Jack replied, politely. "Are you going to marry Uncle Spencer?"

Behind them, Garcia and Morgan both laughed while Prentiss groaned. She pulled out a ten and slapped it into Morgan's outstretched palm. Reid glared at them both.

"Come on, Jack," Rossi said, taking Jack from Reid's arms. "What have I told you about listening to anything that Mr. Derek tells you to do?"

"Only to do it if you're in on the bet," Jack repeated dutifully.

JJ shook her head. She excused herself before wandering into the kitchen. She found Hotch standing at the counter, arranging food on a tray. JJ stood beside him, rubbing his back.

"Reid's here," she told him. "He brought Lauren. She seems sweet."

"I'll be out in a minute," Hotch replied. He never looked up from the food.

JJ removed her hand and turned so that her hip was against the counter. "Is everything okay?"

"Everything's fine. I'm just trying to get the food organized. Anna usually takes care of these details."

"Hotch-"

"JJ," Jack interrupted, pulling Henry along, "Henry has to use the potty, but he won't let anybody, but you take him."

JJ shot one last look at Hotch before picking Henry up to take him to the bathroom. Jack took her place next to Hotch. "Daddy, have you thought about my birthday?"

"Not today, Jack," Hotch told him, soberly.

"But, Daddy-"

Hotch slammed down the knife in his hand. "I said not today. Go play."

Jack puffed before running from the kitchen. He ran straight to Rossi and sat on his lap, pouting while the party continued. He finally left when it was time to open presents, the draw of seeing what Henry got too big for his sullen mood. The rest of the party passed uneventfully.

"Can we help with anything?" Reid asked as Hotch and JJ collected leftover plates and cups. Lauren stood next to him where she had joyfully been the entire time. Jack and Henry were playing in with Henry's new toys in his room.

JJ shook her head before hugging him. "No, we got it. Thank you so much for coming, Spence. The boys were so glad you came. And, Lauren, it was great to finally meet you. You're going to have to come to our next outing."

"Sounds wonderful," Lauren told her.

"Hey, Casanova," Morgan called out from the hallway. "We're going to head to the movies. You and your girl want to come with us?"

Reid glanced at Lauren who shrugged. "Sure."

"What about you, Rossi?"

"Another time," Rossi grinned. "I've got to get home."

Rossi's comment brought a bit of tension into the house that had dissipated during the course of the party. Rossi cleared his throat uncomfortably before saying his good-byes to the rest of the team. The others quickly followed.

"That seemed to go well," JJ commented to break the silence that descended over them after the others had left.

"Mm-hm," was all Hotch replied.

JJ frowned. "Jack wants to have a sleepover next Friday with a few of his friends. What do you think?"

"Whatever you want," he answered.

JJ threw the plates and napkins in her hands onto the coffee table. "Okay, are you going to tell me what's going on?"

"It's been a long day, JJ. I'm just tired."

JJ nodded. "And what's your excuse for the last few weeks?"

Hotch stood up and faced her, his eyes hallow. "What are you talking about?"

"You've been pulling away from me, away from us, since Anna went into the hospital. We've barely spent any alone time together."

"What are you talking about? We live together."

JJ licked her lips. "Yeah, we leave together and you've been going in early and coming home late. We take separate cars to work. We haven't had lunch together. You make sure that one of the boys is with us at all times when we're in the same room together. You haven't come into my room once or invited me into yours since the night you, me, and Jack slept in your room."

Hotch folded his arms, becoming defensive. "In case you haven't noticed, we've been a bit busy between increased paperwork at work and not having a nanny at home."

"We have a nanny now. Let's ask her to stay late on Monday and go to dinner together. Or we can get Rossi and Anna to look after them and do lunch tomorrow."

"I have work to do tomorrow and a late meeting with Strauss on Monday." Hotch wouldn't quite meet her eye.

JJ released a long breath. "Okay. What about telling the boys about us? You were all gung-ho about it, but you haven't mentioned a word lately."

"I just don't think this is the right time."

JJ froze, her heart pounding. "What do you mean?"

Hotch completely turned his head away. "I just think there's been a lot of changes in the boys' lives right now and throwing one more at them probably isn't the best idea right now."

"They've been wanting this for months. They've been our biggest cheerleaders. They'll be thrilled." JJ's voice was fluctuating between anger and sadness.

"I think," his voice was heavy, "that we should cool things down for a bit. I think everything's been crazy the last couple of months and we need to step back and take a breath."

The color drained from JJ's face and tears welled up in her eyes. "Are you serious? Look at me. Look at me!" JJ waited until he faced her before continuing. "Where is this coming from?"

"I just think that we should take stock of whether or not we-" his voice trailed off and his gaze slipped to her chin.

"Whether or not we should be together? After everything we've been through the last two years are you going to stand there and tell me that you are questioning that?" JJ wiped her nose. "I love you. Do you love me?"

Hotch's eyes flew to hers. "Of course, I do."

"Then, I don't understand how you can tell me that we need a break. We just started!"

"Exactly," Hotch breathed out. "We just started and look how hard it is already. Don't you think that if it was meant to be, it wouldn't be so hard?"

JJ ran her hands through her hair. "It's not hard. You're making it hard!"

Hotch felt his own tears slipping down his cheeks and a sob building in his chest. "I just... I can't right now. There's too much at stake. It was a mistake-"

"A mistake?" JJ roared. "You think being with me is a mistake?"

"That's not what I meant." Hotch took a few steps backwards. "I have to get out of here for awhile."

"Hotch," she called after him. "Hotch!"

JJ sat down on the couch and sobbed as the front door slammed closed.

CMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCM

Hotch returned home after midnight. The house was still. He felt a brief pang of guilt when he noticed that JJ had finished cleaning up after the party without him, but that was nothing compared to the boulder of shame currently residing in his stomach. He hadn't meant for the conversation to turn out that way. He hadn't meant to upset her. His head was just all over the place and he was used to having it on straight. Therefore, he was unprepared when JJ wanted to talk and blurted out anything without thinking.

He loved JJ with all his heart. It tore him apart to think that she would question that, but he had driven her to ask just that very question. At the same time, he wasn't sure he was any good for her. He lost faith in himself so how could he ask her to have faith in him? He adored the family they created with the boys, but he couldn't shake the feeling lately that it was going to be ripped from him at any time. That's why he continuously pushed off Jacks birthday wish.

Hotch sighed as made his way up the stairs. He wasn't sure what he was going to say, but he knew that he needed to talk to JJ. He would do that tomorrow, at least enough that they could continue the friendship they had.

He paused in front of Jack's bedroom. He stuck his head inside, surprised to find it empty. He next moved to Henry's room, but found neither of the boys there either. Assuming they must be sleeping with JJ, he carefully poked his head in her room. However, he found that room to be empty, too. The dread in his chest began to grow as he raced to his own room, hoping they had decided to have a sleepover there, but found that room deserted as well.

Hotch was fumbling for his cell phone when he saw a note in the center of the bed. He recognized JJ's handwriting as he picked it up.

Hotch,

I'm taking the boys to Spencer's for a few days. I think we both need some time to figure out our next step. I've also arranged it with Strauss to take the next two weeks off. I'll have Jack call you tomorrow to check in.

JJ

Hotch sank onto his bed, letting the letter fall onto the floor.

What had he done?