Author's Note: For those of you who are planning on seeing the sixth Harry Potter movie, just skip this chapter. Test screening reports say that there's no Dobby or Kreacher in the movie.

Chapter Twenty-One
The Chapter Where Pretty Much Nothing Happens, Except For Setting Up Stuff That Becomes Important Later On In The Book

The next week, the trio was up late in the Common Room, writing essays about Dementors for Snape. Harry was first to finish, so to pass the time, he decided to read the Half-Blood Princess' diary in hopes that it would give him a hint on how to get the memory from Slughorn.

February 13:

Tomorrow is Valentine's Day, and everyone is
making a big fuss over it this year. Personally,
I don't see what the big deal is. Who wants to
spend a bunch all your time with some loser
who calls you stupid nicknames like Cuddles?
Not me.

I said that this morning, quite loudly. One of
the Hufflepuffs heard and got in my face about
it. I would have smashed him in the face, but
Professor Dumbledore came to break up the
argument. Of course, as soon as Dumbledore
heard we were fighting about Valentine's Day,
he had to give his stupid love lecture, insisting
that love is the most powerful magic in the
world. He's been watching too many soap operas,
in my opinion.

Nothing much else happened today, except that
one of the seventh-years tried to cast Sectumsempra
on me in revenge for the underwear incident last
week. What a jerk. You should only cast that spell
on serious enemies.

On second thought, maybe I'll use it on Blaise
Zambini if he tries asking me out tomorrow.

"Sectumsempra…" Harry said to himself.

"What's that, Harry?" Ron asked.

"Nothing important," Harry said.

"Well, I've got something important to say," Ron said, throwing down his essay. "I'm done!"

Hermione picked up Ron's essay, and, naturally, she found a problem with the first thing she saw. "Ron, you misspelled your name!"

"Whoops," Ron said.

Suddenly there was a Crack!, and Dobby and Kreacher appeared.

"Harry Potter, sir!" Dobby said. "Dobby has come to give his report!"

"Report?" Hermione asked.

"Oh, yeah, I forgot to tell you," Harry said. "I told Dobby and Kreacher to follow Malfoy for a couple of weeks, and tell me about everything he did."

"Stalker," Hermione said.

"I'm not a stalker!" Harry said. "I'm just convinced that Malfoy is up to no good! So, Dobby, Kreacher, what's Malfoy been up to?"

"Draco Malfoy is a bad wizard! He is very mean!" Dobby said.

"Master Malfoy moves with a nobility that befits his pure blood," Kreacher croaked. "His features recall the fine bones of my mistress and his manners are those of—"

"We don't need to hear about you being in love with Malfoy," Ron said. "We get enough of that from Harry."

"I do NOT love Malfoy!" Harry protested.

"I know you don't," Ron grinned, "But I've heard some rumors about why you don't have a girlfriend."

Harry rolled his eyes. "Kreacher, just tell us if Malfoy's been doing anything suspicious."

"Master Malfoy is a pure blood, incapable of treachery," Kreacher said. "Surely—"

"Malfoy has been sneaking to the seventh floor, spending most of his time in the Room of Requirement!" Dobby said.

"He has?" Harry asked.

Kreacher and Dobby nodded.

"So that's where he is when he disappears from the Marauder's Map! HA! I've got him now!" Harry rejoiced. "Great job, you two! You can stop following Malfoy now!"

Kreacher and Dobby Disapparated.

"See, Hermione?" Harry gloated. "I told you Malfoy's up to something! Now all I have to do is find out what, and I can get him expelled!"

The next day, during his free period, Harry went to where the Room of Requirement was. Concentrating hard, he thought I need to see where Malfoy goes, I need to see where Malfoy goes…

Harry walked past the door three times, but nothing happened.

"What?" Harry said. "That didn't work? Lame!"

Harry tried again, this time thinking I need you to become the place you become for Draco Malfoy, but that didn't work either.

"Urgh!" Harry said. "Don't tell me I can't get in because Malfoy wants to keep what he's doing a secret!"

Harry spent the next hour thinking of different ways to ask the door to let him in, such as I'm not really Harry Potter; I'm Malfoy in a Harry Potter costume and If you don't let me in, I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow the door in! Unfortunately, none of them worked.

"Too bad this isn't the Order of the Phoenix movie where Umbridge could just blast her way into the room," Harry muttered. "Even though that totally violates the rule of not letting someone in another person's secret room."

Very angry with that particular rule, Harry slinked off to Defense Against the Dark Arts class, where Snape was being his usual jerky self.

"I suppose none of you dunderheads can tell me the difference between an Inferius and a ghost," Snape sneered. "Potter, why don't you try, so I can make fun of your answer?"

"Well, ghosts are transparent…" Harry began.

"Oh, WOW, ghosts are transparent. I can see why you got an "O" on your Dark Arts OWL, Mr. Potter. You're clearly the genius of the year," Snape said sarcastically.

"And Inferi are dead bodies, so they're solid…" Harry continued.

"A five year old could have told us as much," Snape interrupted. "Speaking of five, five points from Gryffindor for not being prepared for class. For your information, an Inferius is a dead body which is reanimated by a Dark Wizard. They are not truly alive. A ghost, on the other hand, is the imprint of a departed soul left upon the earth."

"So, what's the major difference between them?" Seamus Finnigan asked.

"Inferi are corporeal; ghosts are not," Snape said. "In other words, 'Cuddles' would be a good nickname for an Inferius. It would be a bad nickname for a ghost, because you can't touch ghosts."

"So, basically, what I said," Harry said. "Ghosts are transparent and Inferi are solid."

"TWENTY POINTS FROM GRYFFINDOR FOR BEING A SMART ALECK, MR. POTTER!" Snape said suddenly. "Now everyone turn to page three hundred and ninety-four…"

After class, Harry and Ron went to the bathroom together. Not to use the bathroom, though. They just went into the bathroom to talk.

"Snape is such a jerk," Harry said.

"Yeah," Ron agreed. "So what happened with the Room of Requirement?"

"I couldn't get in," Harry confessed. "It looks like Malfoy'll get away with…whatever it is he's doing. I wish—WOAH!"

At that moment, in a total invasion of privacy, Moaning Myrtle came floating into the bathroom.

"Oh," she said glumly. "It's you."

"You were expecting someone else?" Harry said sarcastically.

"Yes, actually," Myrtle said. "A boy. I like to meet him here and talk with him about his feelings."

"Personally, a bathroom is the last place I'd like to talk about my feelings," Ron said. "This guy must a real weirdo."

"Don't say bad things about my boyfriend," Myrtle sniffed.

"If Myrtle has a boyfriend, then it's official," Harry said. "There are no more single girls at Hogwarts."

The following week was no good for Harry. Not only couldn't he get into the Room of Requirement, he also couldn't talk to Slughorn outside of class.

"You don't need to trick Slughorn into giving you that memory," Hermione said. "You have to persuade him."

"How can I persuade him if I can't even talk to him?" Harry asked.

"I don't know," Hermione said. "Maybe you should try bringing him some chocolate cake in order to get on his good side…"

But even the chocolate cake plan didn't work; Slughorn said "Thanks," ate a piece, then left with the rest of the cake before Harry could ask him a single question.

That weekend, Hermione and Ron went to Hogsmeade for the final Apparition lesson before the official Ministry test. Harry didn't go because he was too young to get his Apparition license, and besides, he wanted to try to get into the Room of the Requirement again.

But, of course, the Room didn't open. Harry tried everything, such as begging the door to open, calling it "Cuddles," bringing it some chocolate cake to get on its good side…but the door remained stubbornly shut.

Eventually, Harry got mad and kicked the wall, which was a dumb thing to do.

"Ow! My foot!" Harry said.

"Harry?" someone asked. He turned and saw that it was Tonks, who, I'm sorry to say, was still being moody and depressed instead of fun and happy like she was in the last book.

"Tonks?" Harry asked. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to see Dumbledore…" Tonks said. "But he's gone, gone…maybe he's already dead and we don't know it yet…dust in the wind…dust in the wind…"

"So you don't know where he is?" Harry asked.

"No…no…he's gone…gone…maybe lost forever…forever…the only thing that last forever is death…death…"

"Right," Harry said.

"You haven't had any letters from anyone in the Order recently, have you?" Tonks asked.

"No one from the Order writes to me ever since Sirius died," Harry said.

Tonks' eyes filled with tears.

"No letters…" Tonks said. "Well…see you later, Harry…maybe…" She then left down the hallway, muttering, "Dust in the wind…death…dust in the wind…death…'

Harry talked about this with Ron and Hermione when they got back from Hogsmeade.

"Dunno what's wrong with her," Ron said. "Sounds like she could use a Cheering Charm or two, to be honest."

"You don't think she could have been…in love with Sirius?"

"What?" Hermione asked.

"When I mentioned his name, she started crying. And her Patronus is a big dog thing now, just like him."

"It's possible, I guess," Hermione said. "But she's his second cousin, so that might be kind of odd…"

"Love is never odd," Ron said, dismissively.

"What about you and Lavender?" Harry asked.

Ron thought for a moment. "Okay, maybe love is odd sometimes."

"Don't feel too bad, mate," Harry said. "You'll break up with Lavender in the next chapter."

"I do?" Ron asked. "Oh, goody!"