A/N: Hello! I just got home from the most amazing experience of my entire life! I drove with my friend and her older sister from California to Wisconsin, met her very... American... family, and drove back. Anyway, about this chapter: I know it's short. But let me tell you, it's a bang! Ahem. I haven't had a lot of time to write. But there's also a few inside jokes some of you might not get. One of them is room 201. Read 'That Day in a Hospital Room'. You can find it on my profile. The other one has to do with a chair and a table, and who sits where. If you gon't get it or remember it, feel free to ask in your review.
Now that I know how I want this whole blasted thing to end, I'll be updating more! And I'll dry my darndest! Enjoy, and please review!
-WhirledPeace
Kakuzu and Hidan lay on the couch, watching the news. "And in other news, the long-lost Obito Uchiha had been found living on California with amnesia. We have our reporters on the scene right now." Hidan fell off the couch in shock, and Kakuzu sat bolt upright.
"What the hell?" Hidan cried.
"-we're glad to have a member of our family back," Madara was saying. Tobi and Sasuke were standing beside him. Sasuke looked bored, and Tobi looked ecstatic. Deidara was next to Tobi, looking rather lost and tired. Fugaku was nowhere to be seen.
"How did you find him?" asked the reporter to Madara. Madara wore dark glasses, and was hoping he was facing the right way.
"Well, I met him at Akatsuki when our businesses became partners. It's nagged at me, since he looks so much like Obito, and finally when Sasuke met him we decided we'd better get a test."
"I see. How does it feel, Obito, to find your family again?" The reporter turned to Tobi.
"Call me Tobi," he said. "And it feels awesome! It'll be nice to have somewhere to go for Christmas."
"Why has no one drawn the conclusion before?"
"That is something we will be taking up with the detectives on the case," Madara said curtly. "As for now, we're glad to have Obito- Tobi- back."
"Do you plan on taking part in anything related to the Uchiha enterprise?" the reporter asked Tobi.
"Nope. I'm sticking with Akatsuki," Tobi replied. Deidara yawned. The reporter seemed to be at a loss for questions, and so turned to Deidara.
"And how do you feel about this?" he asked. Deidara shrugged.
"Pretty cool he now has access to a fortune, yeah," he said. The reporter nodded. Suddenly, he turned to Madara.
"Is it true you've now married a man?" he asked. Madara licked his lips, brow sweating.
"Yes."
"Is that him right there?" The camera panned to catch Zetsu talking to one of the camera men. He looked over, a bit surprised, then looked at the reporter.
"Yes?"
"How do you feel being married to an Uchiha heir?"
"Aggravated."
"Why?"
"He has a million maids and won't pick up his socks." The reporter laughed.
"Do you use any of his fortune?"
"Not really. I haven't read their entire library yet, so I have no reason to spend money." The reporter laughed again.
"Did you have any idea Tobi might be part of the Uchiha family?"
"No," Zetsu sighed. "I'm sad to say that many people have light skin and black hair."
"I see. How do you feel about all the hate your marriage is attracting?"
"I really couldn't care less. I don't read my mail and I have a spam block on my e-mail," Zetsu replied calmly. "I have better things to do than rationalise with people whose best argument is screaming 'fag' from afar." Zetsu glanced at the camera man he had been talking to. "I didn't catch it, what were your views on communism?" The camera panned back to the Uchiha heirs.
"It seems like everything is working out for you. Do you have any plans for the future?"
"We're going to go on as usual, except as a complete family," Madara answered. Sasuke wrapped an arm around Tobi's shoulders, leading him away. Deidara looked up, rather lost, before Tobi turned around and grabbed his hand, kissing him full on the mouth. Madara walked into the reporter.
"I'm so sorry, I wasn't-"
"Oh shut up," Zetsu muttered, grabbing his hand and leading him away. The reporter, rather flustered, turned back to the camera.
"And that's all." Hidan climbed back up on the couch, settling in against Kakuzu.
"You'd kiss me on national television, wouldn't you?" he asked cutely. Kakuzu rolled his eyes.
"Probably just to shut you up." Hidan laughed, pecking Kakuzu on the lips.
Kakuzu was in the kitchen when it happened. Hidan was in the hall, shouting into the kitchen about dinner, when he heard a thud. Panicking, Hidan ran into the kitchen, finding Kakuzu face up on the floor. "Kakuzu!" Hidan screamed, almost running to his side. But then he remembered and ran to the phone, dialing 911. "Help, he had a heart attack! Help!"
"Calm down. Give us your address." After rattling it off, Hidan took deep breaths, trying to calm down. "We'll send an ambulance over immediately. Can you perform CPR?"
"Yes."
"Do it." Hidan dropped the phone and ran over to Kakuzu's side, turning his lover's face and placing his hands on his chest. Taking a deep breath, Hidan pressed their mouths together and blew. He felt Kakuzu's lungs inflate, and then he pressed, expelling the air. He repeated this procedure until the paramedics arrived and separated them. Hidan sat back on the kitchen floor in a daze, watching as the paramedics hoisted his love onto a stretcher and carried him hurriedly down to the ambulance. Hidan followed hazily, feeling it was all a dream.
As they came to the ambulance the paramedics, by some stroke of luck, allowed Hidan to ride with them to the hospital. They got Kakuzu an oxygen mask, and used the AED. Hidan prayed to anyone or thing that would listen for Kakuzu to survive this. He just hunched over and held his stomach, hoping now he wouldn't be sick. After ages they arrived at the hospital and they unloaded Kakuzu, spiriting him off to some unknown part of the hospital and leaving Hidan in the waiting room. Hidan collapsed onto a seat.
Everything had happened so fast. First Kakuzu was making a salad, the next thing Hidan knew he was sitting in a hospital, feeling like his own heart had been torn out. Hands trembling, Hidan got out his phone, dialing it and putting it to his ear. "Hello, un?"
"Kakuzu… hospital-"
"I'll be there, un. Give me the address."
"St. Agnes'…"
"On my way, un." And Deidara hung up. Hidan hung up as well, placing the phone on the arm of his chair. He then collapsed in tears, not caring if anyone was even in the room. His sobs and shrieks of anguish would be heard throughout the entire wing, and a few spared him a sympathetic glance. His tears flowed around his fingers and down his arms, but he couldn't care less. His Kakuzu was dying and there was nothing he could do. Nothing. This helplessness ate away at his sole like a fiery worm, leaving a jagged emptiness behind. Helpless he was indeed, helpless to ease his only love's suffering.
Eventually he felt someone next to him and an arm around his shoulders, but he couldn't feel the warmth. To him it was just pressure. There was no love if Kakuzu wasn't there calling him an idiot. He heard hushed, soothing words, but they didn't even get past his skin. His heart could not recognize anything except sorrow.
"Hidan, darling, please wake up, un." Hidan looked around blurrily. He must have dozed off. He sat up, finding he had been resting in Deidara's lap. "Tobi's got the car, un." Hidan's tears didn't stop, and Deidara helped him up, holding him all the way to the car, and held him in the back seat of the car, but Hidan couldn't feel it. He was lost in a world of dark despair into which no light could penetrate. Deidara talked all he wanted, but Hidan couldn't draw any consolation from it.
Hidan awoke to find himself in a bed. Confused, he looked around, wondering where he was. The door to the bedroom opened and Deidara walked in. He walked over and sat down on the bed next to Hidan. "How are you feeling, un?" Deidara asked. Hidan groaned and looked away. "We have some eggs and toast in the kitchen. You need to eat, un." Hidan shook his head. Deidara calmly took Hidan's arm, helping him up, dragging him into the kitchen. Tobi was sitting on the table, munching on toast. Deidara deposited Hidan in a chair. Getting out a plate, he then began to pile it up with eggs. Hidan just glared at it moodily. "Come on darling, eat up, un," Deidara said. Hidan shook his head. "Hidan, please, you need something in your stomach, yeah."
"Tell me about Kakuzu," Hidan demanded. Deidara licked his lips. He was sitting on the table next to Hidan, who was in the chair.
"I talked to the doctors last night, yeah. He had a heart attack, and needs a transplant very fast, hmm. But there's still a chance…"
"Don't. I've deluded myself enough. Kakuzu's not going to get a transplant." Tears flowed down Hidan's face, and Deidara wrapped his arms around him, kissing his silvery hair.
"It's all right, un. I'm here, yeah." Hidan sobbed, and couldn't feel the warmth in Deidara's words or touch. There was only one way he could feel warm ever again.
Hidan leapt up and ran to the bathroom, getting sick into the toilet. Deidara followed him, holding Hidan's hair from his face and rubbing his back. After a moment Hidan got up and groaned, spitting into the sink and leaning heavily against the wall. Deidara grabbed a cup and filled it with water, handing it to his friend. Hidan drank gratefully before sighing, calming himself. Deidara helped him back to the table and sat him down. "When can I see him?" Hidan demanded.
"During visiting hours, un," Deidara replied. "He was asleep when we left last night, but he might be awake, yeah." Deidara sat on the table next to Hidan, laying a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Eat first, un. You need something in your stomach, yeah." Hidan slowly began eating the eggs on his plate. Deidara sighed, relieved, and exchanged a worried look.
The little trio arrived at the hospital later that morning, and located Kakuzu in room 201. He was awake, but barely. Hidan collapsed next to him, grabbing his hand and looking desperately into Kakuzu's dark, hazy eyes. "Kakuzu?" he asked, tears already flowing down his face.
"Come on, Tobi, let's go find the doctor, yeah," Deidara said, heart aching at the sight of Hidan and Kakuzu. The two left, leaving Hidan to simply lie by his lover.
"So what's happening?" Deidara asked the doctor, crossing his arms over his chest. Her heels made her taller than him, and she looked down at him.
"He needs a transplant within the week or else he'll die," she said. Deidara bit his lips.
"So how does he get a transplant?"
"Someone with his blood type died and gives their heart away."
"I see, un." Deidara sighed. "You look awfully young to be a doctor, hmm."
"I'm training to be one," the nurse replied sheepishly. Deidara nodded. "You actually look rather familiar yourself."
"Hmm?"
"When was the last time you came to a hospital?" she asked. Deidara eyed her.
"Why?"
"Just wondering where I've seen you before."
"I was here last night when we brought my friend in, yeah."
"I don't work Saturdays, I work Fridays and Sundays." Deidara was growing uncomfortable. Tobi stepped in.
"Can you tell us more about Kakuzu's condition?"
"Sure."